Took our cars and melted down the metal to make rings for gay weddings

January 18, 2013 10:23 AM

For Want of a Nail. A vision of the post gun-control apocalypse.
posted by kmz (6 comments total)

That's what a diet of gin and tacos will get you.
posted by 3.2.3 at 10:30 AM on January 18, 2013

"Their guns could hold 30 bullets. Ours could not."

By this measure, the Storm Troopers should have been an unstoppable fighting force....
posted by schmod at 10:30 AM on January 18, 2013

To think I wrote off the gay agenda as propaganda. Keep the beagles off my winky!
posted by biffa at 10:30 AM on January 18, 2013

"Grandpa? I have one more question."

Grandfather sat in silence, listening patiently.

"Grandpa, does all this have something to do with what happened to your face?"

The old man tensed in the darkness, and grunted.

"I mean – the hole in the side of your face – in your cheek – how did that happen?"

"Well, sonny – they were hard times. Everything was was scarce, and we didn't know when the days of plenty might return – if they ever would. And my cheek – well, I had nowhere else to put my tongue, so I just left it there."
posted by koeselitz at 10:35 AM on January 18, 2013 [2 favorites]

This is totally wrong.

Everyone knows that by 2033 all cities in the US will be named Obamatropolis.

Also: Boise, Idaho is an urban legend. Idaho doesn't exist.
posted by chasing at 10:35 AM on January 18, 2013 [2 favorites]

biffa: Keep the beagles off my winky!

The attack beagles gave away the game I think. If the author had left them out, Poe's law would have been fully in effect. Meaning the piece would be indistinguishable from most of what crosses my Facebook feed.
posted by ob1quixote at 10:38 AM on January 18, 2013 [1 favorite]