Friend of mine down in Quincy just named his pit bull “Ozawa.”
February 5, 2019 8:10 AM Subscribe
If Bostonians Loved Other Local Institutions The Way They Loved Their Local Sports Franchises. (Sl McSweeney's)
Giggle. Yeah, that's about right.
posted by Making You Bored For Science at 8:21 AM on February 5, 2019
posted by Making You Bored For Science at 8:21 AM on February 5, 2019
Fahk yeah kid.
posted by The Baffled King at 8:22 AM on February 5, 2019
posted by The Baffled King at 8:22 AM on February 5, 2019
Grew up in Fairfield County, live in Mass now - this checks out.
posted by camyram at 8:37 AM on February 5, 2019 [1 favorite]
posted by camyram at 8:37 AM on February 5, 2019 [1 favorite]
Yant, mush!
posted by slkinsey at 8:40 AM on February 5, 2019 [3 favorites]
posted by slkinsey at 8:40 AM on February 5, 2019 [3 favorites]
To be fair to Boston, this is true of everything everywhere.
posted by The Card Cheat at 8:49 AM on February 5, 2019 [4 favorites]
posted by The Card Cheat at 8:49 AM on February 5, 2019 [4 favorites]
Yeah, but the Stockton Ports really are the best thing about Stockton.
posted by East14thTaco at 8:53 AM on February 5, 2019
posted by East14thTaco at 8:53 AM on February 5, 2019
I'm gonna lay all of you out. Figuratively, of course.
posted by tobascodagama at 9:12 AM on February 5, 2019 [2 favorites]
posted by tobascodagama at 9:12 AM on February 5, 2019 [2 favorites]
Am I missing something? This is how Bostonians talk about that shit. It might take a lot to get them on the subject of the BSO, but once they do, this is exactly what it sounds like.
posted by kevinbelt at 9:13 AM on February 5, 2019 [14 favorites]
posted by kevinbelt at 9:13 AM on February 5, 2019 [14 favorites]
New England's whole "Pissed off little brother" syndrome it has with New York has always made me laugh, but then again, they're my people. I can totally see it irritating people.
Funny thing in my mind is there's always been the same thing between San Francisco and LA, but where NY gives Boston gleeful crap back, most Angelenos response to the amount of grousing about LA from San Francisco is "ehh... I like visiting SF?"
(Dodgers and Giants fans excepted because yeesh)
posted by drewbage1847 at 9:30 AM on February 5, 2019 [3 favorites]
Funny thing in my mind is there's always been the same thing between San Francisco and LA, but where NY gives Boston gleeful crap back, most Angelenos response to the amount of grousing about LA from San Francisco is "ehh... I like visiting SF?"
(Dodgers and Giants fans excepted because yeesh)
posted by drewbage1847 at 9:30 AM on February 5, 2019 [3 favorites]
Fahking Connecticut.
posted by davros42 at 9:34 AM on February 5, 2019 [4 favorites]
posted by davros42 at 9:34 AM on February 5, 2019 [4 favorites]
As comic pieces go, this is a little weird, because the point is that Boston is overcompensating for its shortcomings vis-a-vis NY and, uh, Boston has totally owned NY sportswise for the past decade or so. Actually since about 2002.
(Also, the MFA recently scored a huge donation of Golden Age Dutch art from the Otterloos which includes "arguably the finest and best-preserved Rembrandt portrait in private hands."
Also, the finest Renaissance painting in America is in Boston. Just sayin'.)
posted by praemunire at 10:39 AM on February 5, 2019
(Also, the MFA recently scored a huge donation of Golden Age Dutch art from the Otterloos which includes "arguably the finest and best-preserved Rembrandt portrait in private hands."
Also, the finest Renaissance painting in America is in Boston. Just sayin'.)
posted by praemunire at 10:39 AM on February 5, 2019
This city once aspired to be the Athens of America. I’m not about to disrespect that majestic civic aspiration by acting like a goddamned fucking barbarian.
posted by doctornemo at 11:08 AM on February 5, 2019 [4 favorites]
posted by doctornemo at 11:08 AM on February 5, 2019 [4 favorites]
kevinbelt: Am I missing something? This is how Bostonians talk about that shit.
I have lived in greater Boston & Rhode Island since 1990 and never heard anyone here even mention the BSO, other than the Christmas Pops, except for the bike couriers I ran who used the building as a landmark. (And that was my BiL, whose Rhodey accent is what I was hearing for one voice in my head as I read this article, with the other being an East Boston guy named Mike Pesci who I used to work with.)
posted by wenestvedt at 12:12 PM on February 5, 2019 [2 favorites]
I have lived in greater Boston & Rhode Island since 1990 and never heard anyone here even mention the BSO, other than the Christmas Pops, except for the bike couriers I ran who used the building as a landmark. (And that was my BiL, whose Rhodey accent is what I was hearing for one voice in my head as I read this article, with the other being an East Boston guy named Mike Pesci who I used to work with.)
posted by wenestvedt at 12:12 PM on February 5, 2019 [2 favorites]
Also, the same guy who reads that headline as "QWIN-zee" would pronouce his dog's new name as three separate words.
posted by wenestvedt at 12:13 PM on February 5, 2019 [3 favorites]
posted by wenestvedt at 12:13 PM on February 5, 2019 [3 favorites]
With minimal edits this same thing would work for Philadelphia. (I've lived in both. Both are old cities with old institutions and complicated relationships with New York.)
posted by madcaptenor at 12:22 PM on February 5, 2019 [1 favorite]
posted by madcaptenor at 12:22 PM on February 5, 2019 [1 favorite]
"QWIN-zee"
There is another way to pronounce this word?
posted by jesourie at 12:54 PM on February 5, 2019 [4 favorites]
There is another way to pronounce this word?
posted by jesourie at 12:54 PM on February 5, 2019 [4 favorites]
Well, "QWIN-cee," like the old show "Quincy, M.E." -- not a hard ZEE but a CEE, and with a smidgen less hang time between the sounds.
I grant you, it's a small difference. :7)
Unless you're local, and pullin' my @&^%%^@#in' leg heah?
posted by wenestvedt at 1:07 PM on February 5, 2019
I grant you, it's a small difference. :7)
Unless you're local, and pullin' my @&^%%^@#in' leg heah?
posted by wenestvedt at 1:07 PM on February 5, 2019
I immediately shared this with my Bostonian in-laws; will report back with their thoughts.
posted by TedW at 1:31 PM on February 5, 2019
posted by TedW at 1:31 PM on February 5, 2019
Have lived in the Boston area for over a decade. Enjoyed this immensely.
posted by olinerd at 2:04 PM on February 5, 2019 [1 favorite]
posted by olinerd at 2:04 PM on February 5, 2019 [1 favorite]
I have totally had conversations like the one about biotech and Silicon Valley.
And yeah, I can spend all of a week in NYC before I get the terrible feeling that there isn't any actual land underneath me, like the city just exists as a series of pipes and grates down the Earth's core.
posted by es_de_bah at 3:46 PM on February 5, 2019
And yeah, I can spend all of a week in NYC before I get the terrible feeling that there isn't any actual land underneath me, like the city just exists as a series of pipes and grates down the Earth's core.
posted by es_de_bah at 3:46 PM on February 5, 2019
the point is that Boston is overcompensating for its shortcomings vis-a-vis NY and, uh, Boston has totally owned NY sportswise for the past decade or so. Actually since about 2002.
Boston could win every sports title from now until the year 2153, including in jai alai and harness racing, and a portion of Boston sports fandom would still talk daily shit about the Yankees and Jets/Giants.
A Boston friend of mine reported that she was in the obstetrician's office for an ultrasound today, and the nurses kept popping in to watch the TV that happened to be in the same room, so that they could catch glimpses the Super Bowl parade. "I hope they're showing this in school today!" one of the nurses said.
Reader, as you are probably aware, this is the sixth Super Bowl have won in the past 15 years, and the third in five years.
posted by joyceanmachine at 3:48 PM on February 5, 2019 [6 favorites]
Boston could win every sports title from now until the year 2153, including in jai alai and harness racing, and a portion of Boston sports fandom would still talk daily shit about the Yankees and Jets/Giants.
A Boston friend of mine reported that she was in the obstetrician's office for an ultrasound today, and the nurses kept popping in to watch the TV that happened to be in the same room, so that they could catch glimpses the Super Bowl parade. "I hope they're showing this in school today!" one of the nurses said.
Reader, as you are probably aware, this is the sixth Super Bowl have won in the past 15 years, and the third in five years.
posted by joyceanmachine at 3:48 PM on February 5, 2019 [6 favorites]
Having had to deal with parade-goers overwhelming the commuter rail in both directions today, I have about had my fill of Boston sports and Massholes in general for one day.
posted by briank at 4:48 PM on February 5, 2019 [3 favorites]
posted by briank at 4:48 PM on February 5, 2019 [3 favorites]
"the point is that Boston is overcompensating for its shortcomings vis-a-vis NY and, uh, Boston has totally owned NY sportswise for the past decade or so"
It's not just a sports thing, or a New York thing. Overcompensating for their (many) shortcomings is one of the defining features of the New England personality. They'd talk the same shit about, say, Minneapolis, if they had any conception that Minneapolis was a real place and not something made-up like Hogwarts or Oz. NYC just gets it because no one in New England has ever traveled west of the Hudson River. I had someone tell me once that the best Mexican restaurants in America are in Massachusetts. I'm like, uh, what about the states that actually border Mexico? There are so few Mexicans in Mass that they have white people working in the kitchens of their Mexican restaurants. But sure, whatever. Whatever the topic of conversation, Massachusetts is the best at it. One of my FB friends comments on every post "Ohio sucks, Mass is better" (I'm from Ohio). And these are people I like! One of my co-workers refuses to talk to me because I pointed out that Kyrie Irving couldn't be the best point guard in the NBA because, at the time, Russell Westbrook was averaging a triple-double over the course of an entire season, and Steph Curry was literally redefining the way the game is played. "Westbrook? Bum! Curry? Bum!" Seriously.
posted by kevinbelt at 5:37 PM on February 5, 2019 [6 favorites]
It's not just a sports thing, or a New York thing. Overcompensating for their (many) shortcomings is one of the defining features of the New England personality. They'd talk the same shit about, say, Minneapolis, if they had any conception that Minneapolis was a real place and not something made-up like Hogwarts or Oz. NYC just gets it because no one in New England has ever traveled west of the Hudson River. I had someone tell me once that the best Mexican restaurants in America are in Massachusetts. I'm like, uh, what about the states that actually border Mexico? There are so few Mexicans in Mass that they have white people working in the kitchens of their Mexican restaurants. But sure, whatever. Whatever the topic of conversation, Massachusetts is the best at it. One of my FB friends comments on every post "Ohio sucks, Mass is better" (I'm from Ohio). And these are people I like! One of my co-workers refuses to talk to me because I pointed out that Kyrie Irving couldn't be the best point guard in the NBA because, at the time, Russell Westbrook was averaging a triple-double over the course of an entire season, and Steph Curry was literally redefining the way the game is played. "Westbrook? Bum! Curry? Bum!" Seriously.
posted by kevinbelt at 5:37 PM on February 5, 2019 [6 favorites]
— Because there’s far, far less to see and do here, and so it’s easier to concentrate.I loved this part, which works for every small city's inferiority complex.
— Exactly.
posted by Harvey Kilobit at 8:26 PM on February 5, 2019 [3 favorites]
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Fehfield Cownee
posted by wellred at 8:14 AM on February 5, 2019 [5 favorites]