we’ve found it folks: mcmansion heaven
February 2, 2024 12:11 PM Subscribe
It is rare to find a house that has everything. A house that wills itself into Postmodernism yet remains unable to let go of the kookiest moments of the prior zeitgeist, the Bruce Goffs and Earthships, the commune houses built from car windshields, the seventies moments of psychedelic hippie fracture. It is everything. It has everything. It is theme park, it is High Tech. It is Renaissance (in the San Antonio Riverwalk sense of the word.) It is medieval. It is maybe the greatest pastiche to sucker itself to the side of a mountain, perilously overlooking a large body of water.McMansion Hell (previ-ously on MeFi) explores the arcane architecture of 354 County Road 211 in Bremen, Alabama -- a gaudy (or Guadían?) wonder known locally as the Castle at Smith Lake.
Look at it. Just look.
Other recent favorites (that made me lol):
The McMansion Hell Yearbook: 1981 - "Okay. Okay. We’ve completed our tour of the main, relatively normal McMansion part of this house. We are now entering the Sicko Zone, wherein everything gets progressively a little more, well, sick."
Suburban Chicago McMansions Follow a Dark Logic Even I Do Not Understand - "Usually vernacular architecture has some kind of origin point, a builder or a style or a developer one can point to and say, aha, that’s where that comes from. [...] However, the McMansions in the Chicago Suburbs are so wildly customized and unique, it is as though each of the ten listed here were in competition with one another to build the most outrageous collage of wealth signifiers imaginable, to the point where their architecture becomes almost un-house-like."
gatekeep, gaslight, girlboss: "Howdy, folks! Today we will be heading down south to the Atlanta suburbs to view what may be the most yassified house in existence."
dome sweet dome: "First of all, trying to visualize the floor plan of this house is like trying to rotate seven cubes individually in my mind’s eye. Second, if you stand right beneath the hole in the ceiling you can get the approximate sensation of being a cartoon character who has just instantaneously fallen in love."
mojo dojo casa house: "Scale (especially the human one) is unfathomable to the people who built this house. They must have some kind of rare spatial reasoning problem where they perceive themselves to be the size of at least a sedan, maybe a small aircraft. Also as you can see they only know of the existence of a single color."
The Zillow listing. Asking $4.9 million, but it's been on the market since July so there might be a little room to negotiate, if you're on the fence.
posted by Mr.Know-it-some at 12:27 PM on February 2 [10 favorites]
posted by Mr.Know-it-some at 12:27 PM on February 2 [10 favorites]
I picture an architect in a straitjacket laughing maniacally in an underground cell
posted by gottabefunky at 12:32 PM on February 2 [7 favorites]
posted by gottabefunky at 12:32 PM on February 2 [7 favorites]
gottabefunky: "I picture an architect in a straitjacket laughing maniacally in an underground cell"
You're in luck! (Ctrl+F "tunnel", though the photo is labeled dungeon)
posted by Rhaomi at 12:36 PM on February 2 [2 favorites]
You're in luck! (Ctrl+F "tunnel", though the photo is labeled dungeon)
posted by Rhaomi at 12:36 PM on February 2 [2 favorites]
If I was an ultramillionaire who was for some reason unable to do anything to help humanity with the money, part of me would accept the ridiculous upkeep costs for all the one-off stuff just because the variety is so wild.
But I also know that with this design chaos there are probably a lot of normal-house things that would've been overlooked, like making sure the rain gutters don't overflow onto electrical outlets, or being able to walk around the living room safely in dim light without, like, falling into a wonkavator shaft.
posted by Riki tiki at 12:41 PM on February 2 [19 favorites]
But I also know that with this design chaos there are probably a lot of normal-house things that would've been overlooked, like making sure the rain gutters don't overflow onto electrical outlets, or being able to walk around the living room safely in dim light without, like, falling into a wonkavator shaft.
posted by Riki tiki at 12:41 PM on February 2 [19 favorites]
I saw this post yesterday basically the minute that it was up, since I am an obsessive fan. I love this house. If I had $4.9 million, it's not what I'd buy, but if someone gave it to me or I moved in after the revolution, I'm sure I would be very happy. There is a certain kind of puffy-pomo oversized detailing that is just the very stuff of childhood feelings of security to me, especially those enormous arched windows. And the double-glassed sunroom, that's where I'd idle away all my days as long as it wasn't too hot. I'd even try to make some of the furniture work - maybe that horrifying log bed would be okay if you...painted it? Covered it in gold leaf?
posted by Frowner at 12:41 PM on February 2 [7 favorites]
posted by Frowner at 12:41 PM on February 2 [7 favorites]
I just don't get the multi-floor stucco "booger" hanging off the house between the brickwork and the rest of the stucco exterior. Like, was it originally painted like the surrounding stone, to make the house look like it was built into the bluff? It confounds me.
The rest of it for the most part - eh, it's not the weirdest McMansion Hell I've ever seen.
posted by Kyol at 12:42 PM on February 2
The rest of it for the most part - eh, it's not the weirdest McMansion Hell I've ever seen.
posted by Kyol at 12:42 PM on February 2
The mojo dojo casa house linked above is just amazingly awful. The primary one in the FPP at least has some character, even if it's entirely baffling, but that one is just grim.
posted by dellsolace at 12:43 PM on February 2 [2 favorites]
posted by dellsolace at 12:43 PM on February 2 [2 favorites]
Omg and she didn't even see the TUNNEL BENEATH THE HOUSE!
posted by capricorn at 12:45 PM on February 2 [1 favorite]
posted by capricorn at 12:45 PM on February 2 [1 favorite]
Spoiler alert--it looks like it must be at least three shots but if you aim for the front door it goes through and pops right out onto the green for a hole-in-one.
posted by Horace Rumpole at 12:47 PM on February 2 [7 favorites]
posted by Horace Rumpole at 12:47 PM on February 2 [7 favorites]
Every year on our annual family beach trip Copronymus and I talk about how we'd love to see Kate Wagner take on multifamily beach house architecture and decor. It's over-the-top, absurd, and absolutely has its own unique vernacular and style. While this still hasn't happened yet, I actually think what we're witnessing here is the missing link between McMansion and Beach McMansion: the Lake McMansion. This is worthy of further study.
posted by capricorn at 12:48 PM on February 2 [3 favorites]
posted by capricorn at 12:48 PM on February 2 [3 favorites]
The window intimates the potential of seeing. But no one sees.
posted by Greg_Ace at 12:48 PM on February 2 [1 favorite]
posted by Greg_Ace at 12:48 PM on February 2 [1 favorite]
Hell? This is heaven. This is like you gave a coked out architect one simple instruction: I want all the styles of house. The exterior doesn’t even match the dimensions of the interior! This is some dot of weird non-Euclidean space. Like a jar where the water flows from inside to the outside to the inside.
posted by geoff. at 12:50 PM on February 2 [7 favorites]
posted by geoff. at 12:50 PM on February 2 [7 favorites]
Like a jar where the water flows from inside to the outside to the inside.
or a portal to another dimension to where this house drains the planet of good taste
posted by lalochezia at 1:03 PM on February 2 [2 favorites]
or a portal to another dimension to where this house drains the planet of good taste
posted by lalochezia at 1:03 PM on February 2 [2 favorites]
The "cedar shake roof to skate park" play right in there is amazing. Business on the left, party on the right, kawabunga in the middle.
posted by mhoye at 1:10 PM on February 2 [4 favorites]
posted by mhoye at 1:10 PM on February 2 [4 favorites]
It's pretty bad, but if given it I'd live there for a bit at least. If it has any good qualities they are that it doesn't seem to be trying to be anything else, like a faux castle or faux french country house or faux FLW. It's own best self. It also speaks of lots of meetings where the client brings in Yet Another photo they've discovered of something they like and told to add it in. I wonder how long it took to build? How much was built and then torn down as the whims change?
The playdough carbuncle is just plain awful.
posted by maxwelton at 1:14 PM on February 2
The playdough carbuncle is just plain awful.
posted by maxwelton at 1:14 PM on February 2
I really want a space opera window.
posted by doctornemo at 1:20 PM on February 2 [2 favorites]
posted by doctornemo at 1:20 PM on February 2 [2 favorites]
I would so put toeholds all over the thing and have an outside climbing wall.
I mean, the price is outside my range and the location is not my cup of sweet tea, but I'd live in that house.
posted by ocschwar at 1:20 PM on February 2 [2 favorites]
I mean, the price is outside my range and the location is not my cup of sweet tea, but I'd live in that house.
posted by ocschwar at 1:20 PM on February 2 [2 favorites]
The further in you go, the tackier it gets.
posted by Daily Alice at 1:21 PM on February 2
posted by Daily Alice at 1:21 PM on February 2
You're in luck! (Ctrl+F "tunnel", though the photo is labeled dungeon)
They misspelled "weird sex room."
But jokes aside, at least the house has character and is unique. It's definitely not my personal aesthetic, but it's also not a rectangular box that looks like the rectangular box to each side. If the goal was to have the best resale value and have the most potential buyers, you'd basically do nothing like this except the fancy bathrooms and typical-of-the-era kitchen.
I disagree with her that this qualifies as a McMansion. It is way too individual for that, much closer to one of those outsider art projects than an actual McMansion. Making fun of it for the terrible design is legit, but you need to critique it on its own terms.
(Like, the stairway that is paneled in "sheets of plywood screwed and glue together with glue squeezed out to create texture" -- that is so wildly out of character with every other piece of the house, but probably cost far more than something that would have fit with the rest of the aesthetic.)
posted by Dip Flash at 1:22 PM on February 2 [6 favorites]
They misspelled "weird sex room."
But jokes aside, at least the house has character and is unique. It's definitely not my personal aesthetic, but it's also not a rectangular box that looks like the rectangular box to each side. If the goal was to have the best resale value and have the most potential buyers, you'd basically do nothing like this except the fancy bathrooms and typical-of-the-era kitchen.
I disagree with her that this qualifies as a McMansion. It is way too individual for that, much closer to one of those outsider art projects than an actual McMansion. Making fun of it for the terrible design is legit, but you need to critique it on its own terms.
(Like, the stairway that is paneled in "sheets of plywood screwed and glue together with glue squeezed out to create texture" -- that is so wildly out of character with every other piece of the house, but probably cost far more than something that would have fit with the rest of the aesthetic.)
posted by Dip Flash at 1:22 PM on February 2 [6 favorites]
I can't believe this wasn't AI generated.
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln at 1:22 PM on February 2 [5 favorites]
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln at 1:22 PM on February 2 [5 favorites]
This looks like it was built by somebody who wanted to make Myst but accidentally made Holovista.
posted by mhoye at 1:35 PM on February 2 [11 favorites]
posted by mhoye at 1:35 PM on February 2 [11 favorites]
The author is arguing that this place represents an outer limit of the McMansion.
I also find this house someplace that could be home, hence McMansion heave. It isn’t the typical hell but it very much still retains the ‘theme restaurant’ vibe.
posted by zenon at 1:41 PM on February 2 [1 favorite]
The customization here lies in the assemblage of materials and in doing so stretches them to the height of their imaginative capacity. To borrow from Charles Jencks, ad-hoc is a perfect description.I certainly cant think of a different school of design for it. The house was likely conceived in the time before street view, Zillow tourism and the oddball house could be elevated from a local novelty to widespread scrutiny.
I also find this house someplace that could be home, hence McMansion heave. It isn’t the typical hell but it very much still retains the ‘theme restaurant’ vibe.
posted by zenon at 1:41 PM on February 2 [1 favorite]
It’s 44 years old! Possibly the adhoc construction was also good. It sure doesn’t look easy to repair.
(Or that explains the ?climbing wall? down the back. )
posted by clew at 2:05 PM on February 2
(Or that explains the ?climbing wall? down the back. )
posted by clew at 2:05 PM on February 2
Who keeps the windows clean?
posted by njohnson23 at 2:25 PM on February 2 [4 favorites]
posted by njohnson23 at 2:25 PM on February 2 [4 favorites]
(In the case of the houses featured in this post, nine of ten are located in Barrington, IL, which just might be the census designated place known as McMansion Hell.)
Can confirm.
posted by We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese at 2:43 PM on February 2 [2 favorites]
Can confirm.
posted by We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese at 2:43 PM on February 2 [2 favorites]
Don’t yuck on someone else’s yum.
Why does Metafilter have to be so snobby about other people’s homes?
posted by Ideefixe at 2:58 PM on February 2 [5 favorites]
Why does Metafilter have to be so snobby about other people’s homes?
posted by Ideefixe at 2:58 PM on February 2 [5 favorites]
OH. MY.
posted by Faintdreams at 3:26 PM on February 2 [1 favorite]
posted by Faintdreams at 3:26 PM on February 2 [1 favorite]
Hey, this is Metafilter - we gotta have someone to look down on!
/s
posted by Greg_Ace at 3:27 PM on February 2 [2 favorites]
/s
posted by Greg_Ace at 3:27 PM on February 2 [2 favorites]
Ideefixe : Did you see the Gallery? The Mishmash of styles? The Architectural Chaos? The Sheer, extravagant, audaciousness of .. *everything* ?
That is why the snark.
That is why alllll the snark.
posted by Faintdreams at 3:28 PM on February 2 [7 favorites]
That is why the snark.
That is why alllll the snark.
posted by Faintdreams at 3:28 PM on February 2 [7 favorites]
I kind of like it but at $5m on 6 acres on a lakeside, it's not a mcmansion, it's an actual mansion. A ridiculous one, but I think one that qualifies.
posted by The_Vegetables at 3:40 PM on February 2 [1 favorite]
posted by The_Vegetables at 3:40 PM on February 2 [1 favorite]
I love McMansion Hell...
So many lawyer foyers and an arts.
Reading TFA now
posted by Windopaene at 4:27 PM on February 2 [4 favorites]
So many lawyer foyers and an arts.
Reading TFA now
posted by Windopaene at 4:27 PM on February 2 [4 favorites]
"Prince didn't die for this"
posted by Windopaene at 4:42 PM on February 2 [9 favorites]
posted by Windopaene at 4:42 PM on February 2 [9 favorites]
That house is the sideshow bob rake gag of houses. It commits so, so much to the bit that it goes all the way back through being awful to being awesome. I actually kind of dig it.
I just don't get the multi-floor stucco "booger" hanging off the house between the brickwork and the rest of the stucco exterior. Like, was it originally painted like the surrounding stone, to make the house look like it was built into the bluff? It confounds me.
In my mind It's the beginner-level climbing wall, it just needs bolts. In all seriousness that's what I'd do, having build home climbing walls for my kids before. Beginner level because it's inward sloping, but you could still set some interesting routes on it especially if you include the rock and the battlements. Plus, if a couple own the house they can sexy times role-play Princess Bride Cliff Climbing, with the sword fight on the deck level.
posted by true at 4:46 PM on February 2 [8 favorites]
I just don't get the multi-floor stucco "booger" hanging off the house between the brickwork and the rest of the stucco exterior. Like, was it originally painted like the surrounding stone, to make the house look like it was built into the bluff? It confounds me.
In my mind It's the beginner-level climbing wall, it just needs bolts. In all seriousness that's what I'd do, having build home climbing walls for my kids before. Beginner level because it's inward sloping, but you could still set some interesting routes on it especially if you include the rock and the battlements. Plus, if a couple own the house they can sexy times role-play Princess Bride Cliff Climbing, with the sword fight on the deck level.
posted by true at 4:46 PM on February 2 [8 favorites]
Who keeps the windows clean? Alabama Pressure Washer's cleaning drone (tiktok).
Flintstones moment/stucco booger/LARP opp looks like a Dalí moai here (photo 8/25).
"The Castle at Smith Lake" has "a grandfathered-in fishing hut on the water with bunk beds, a kitchenette and a fishing hole."
posted by Iris Gambol at 5:02 PM on February 2
Flintstones moment/stucco booger/LARP opp looks like a Dalí moai here (photo 8/25).
"The Castle at Smith Lake" has "a grandfathered-in fishing hut on the water with bunk beds, a kitchenette and a fishing hole."
posted by Iris Gambol at 5:02 PM on February 2
Kate Wagner Lives in Chicago land so lots of her early work is local.
As for yucks and yums if it were my million dollar mansion, either those over in Barrington or this adhoc lake castle Id be ok with any of these hot takes on the styling. My focus would probably be on figuring out what bust to put in library to impress Wall Street Journal readers.
posted by zenon at 5:03 PM on February 2
As for yucks and yums if it were my million dollar mansion, either those over in Barrington or this adhoc lake castle Id be ok with any of these hot takes on the styling. My focus would probably be on figuring out what bust to put in library to impress Wall Street Journal readers.
posted by zenon at 5:03 PM on February 2
Homeowners went with a classic Lumbago Nicklaus instead of a bust.
This house makes me wanna Fanta.
posted by Iris Gambol at 5:10 PM on February 2 [1 favorite]
This house makes me wanna Fanta.
posted by Iris Gambol at 5:10 PM on February 2 [1 favorite]
Proof that in architecture, as in all art, you can go straight through “bad” and out the other side to “sublime” if only you want it hard enough. Who’s going to help me lobby UNSECO?
posted by q*ben at 5:26 PM on February 2 [4 favorites]
posted by q*ben at 5:26 PM on February 2 [4 favorites]
Damn, that place is something else. It really needs to be furnished in 1980s Memphis, tho.
posted by fimbulvetr at 5:46 PM on February 2 [2 favorites]
posted by fimbulvetr at 5:46 PM on February 2 [2 favorites]
The first house here has a couple good points: I actually love the Minas Tirith battlement thing right up until it becomes playdough. If they hadn’t put that thing on top I would’ve thought it was kinda cool.
What really made me stop and say “oh shit I non-ironically love that” were the architectural beams for the gaming/home office room that get called out 2/3rds of the way down. It’s like somebody distilled the word “Gravitas” into a structural support column. I am never going to have the money to play supervillain (and if I do then I’m too busy living in Sailing La Vagabond’s new Rapido 60 yacht). Specifically the kind of supervillain that gets to leave spittle-flecked 5 minute messages on their architect’s phone at 3AM.
But if I were? Day 1, Step 1 of planning out my mansion-lair is showing the architect that picture, tapping those beams and saying “start here.”
posted by Ryvar at 7:52 PM on February 2 [3 favorites]
What really made me stop and say “oh shit I non-ironically love that” were the architectural beams for the gaming/home office room that get called out 2/3rds of the way down. It’s like somebody distilled the word “Gravitas” into a structural support column. I am never going to have the money to play supervillain (and if I do then I’m too busy living in Sailing La Vagabond’s new Rapido 60 yacht). Specifically the kind of supervillain that gets to leave spittle-flecked 5 minute messages on their architect’s phone at 3AM.
But if I were? Day 1, Step 1 of planning out my mansion-lair is showing the architect that picture, tapping those beams and saying “start here.”
posted by Ryvar at 7:52 PM on February 2 [3 favorites]
The scale and er, style(s) seems very…Kubrick 2001, if you know what I mean.
posted by mollymillions at 8:32 PM on February 2
posted by mollymillions at 8:32 PM on February 2
I . . . love this house. I can't help it.
posted by thivaia at 9:05 PM on February 2 [2 favorites]
posted by thivaia at 9:05 PM on February 2 [2 favorites]
The only way that house sells is if someone buys the vacant property after the insurance fire.
posted by JohnnyGunn at 11:17 PM on February 2
posted by JohnnyGunn at 11:17 PM on February 2
I am an engineer and my wife has an architecture/design background, so I will openly admit we love McMansion Hell. I kinda always found it fascinating to see people with actual means buying such boring almost sad properties. If I had that kind of money I'd be building/buying something with a cool midcentury vibe that got people's attention. Like the Ben Rose house in Illinois, but on a more populated, walkable lot. Not that I'll ever have that kind of money, but I can dream.
Why does Metafilter have to be so snobby about other people’s homes?
Because the McMansion is, IMO, not just hideous but horribly cheap and wasteful. It's kind of an embodiment of everything that is wrong with American consumerism culture - there is zero attempt to be substanable, to integrate into the surrounding environment, to build with quality materials that would last, or even build in such a way that the neighborhood is walkable or accessible in any way (note how most of the traditional McMansions are built like faux-estates, no doubt with massive setbacks to keep the commoners out).
Also, normal people don't buy $5MM houses. Not gonna feel bad about crticizing the poor taste of rich people, seeing them as "just like us" is part of what is wrong with the US today.
posted by photo guy at 1:02 AM on February 3 [21 favorites]
Why does Metafilter have to be so snobby about other people’s homes?
Because the McMansion is, IMO, not just hideous but horribly cheap and wasteful. It's kind of an embodiment of everything that is wrong with American consumerism culture - there is zero attempt to be substanable, to integrate into the surrounding environment, to build with quality materials that would last, or even build in such a way that the neighborhood is walkable or accessible in any way (note how most of the traditional McMansions are built like faux-estates, no doubt with massive setbacks to keep the commoners out).
Also, normal people don't buy $5MM houses. Not gonna feel bad about crticizing the poor taste of rich people, seeing them as "just like us" is part of what is wrong with the US today.
posted by photo guy at 1:02 AM on February 3 [21 favorites]
I really think that lake house transcends McMansion status. The whole point of ‘Mc’ is to invoke a generic, fast food version of architecture, and that thing is not generic.
The worst thing about the built environment is mile after mile of mediocrity. ‘Ugly but interesting’ beats ‘mediocre and boring’ every time.
posted by Bloxworth Snout at 3:59 AM on February 3 [10 favorites]
The worst thing about the built environment is mile after mile of mediocrity. ‘Ugly but interesting’ beats ‘mediocre and boring’ every time.
posted by Bloxworth Snout at 3:59 AM on February 3 [10 favorites]
Remember late-era Frank Lloyd Wright? These architects dared to ask: What if he sucked?
Every link needs to be clicked on, my friends! The LOLs, they never stop!
posted by fuzzy.little.sock at 5:43 AM on February 3 [1 favorite]
Every link needs to be clicked on, my friends! The LOLs, they never stop!
posted by fuzzy.little.sock at 5:43 AM on February 3 [1 favorite]
But it IS taking generic elements and mish moshing them together (like The Sims! I've made roofs with all those pointless gables!) with no normal guiding principles of architecture, which to me is the essence of McMansionism.
posted by tiny frying pan at 5:48 AM on February 3
posted by tiny frying pan at 5:48 AM on February 3
It is the "oooo I want that toooooooo!" style of building a house, like a Life is Hell cartoon dream home. It's the richie riches indulging every whim and that's why it's ugly and contemptable.
posted by tiny frying pan at 5:56 AM on February 3 [1 favorite]
posted by tiny frying pan at 5:56 AM on February 3 [1 favorite]
I am an engineer and my wife has an architecture/design background, so I will openly admit we love McMansion Hell. I kinda always found it fascinating to see people with actual means buying such boring almost sad properties. If I had that kind of money I'd be building/buying something with a cool midcentury vibe that got people's attention. Like the Ben Rose house in Illinois, but on a more populated, walkable lot. Not that I'll ever have that kind of money, but I can dream.
The funny thing is how architectural tastes have such a very predictable curve. So when something is new, people like it, but then it falls out of fashion, generally for around 40-ish years. That 's the window where people knock down buildings or do non-historically accurate renovations and no one cares other than a few especially ardent preservationists.
So when I was a kid, mid-century was rapidly dropping out of style and already looked dated. I can remember my parents rolling their eyes at my grandparents' ultra mid-century house for exactly the kinds of reasons people roll their eyes at the McMansions. But now, mid-century has been back on the good list for the last decade or two and people would kill for a genuine mid-century house that had been spared from clumsy updates in the intervening decades.
The point of this being: if you wait thirty or so years, the remaining untouched, well-preserved McMansions will be back in demand. ("Oh wow, look at the great room!")
posted by Dip Flash at 6:40 AM on February 3 [3 favorites]
The funny thing is how architectural tastes have such a very predictable curve. So when something is new, people like it, but then it falls out of fashion, generally for around 40-ish years. That 's the window where people knock down buildings or do non-historically accurate renovations and no one cares other than a few especially ardent preservationists.
So when I was a kid, mid-century was rapidly dropping out of style and already looked dated. I can remember my parents rolling their eyes at my grandparents' ultra mid-century house for exactly the kinds of reasons people roll their eyes at the McMansions. But now, mid-century has been back on the good list for the last decade or two and people would kill for a genuine mid-century house that had been spared from clumsy updates in the intervening decades.
The point of this being: if you wait thirty or so years, the remaining untouched, well-preserved McMansions will be back in demand. ("Oh wow, look at the great room!")
posted by Dip Flash at 6:40 AM on February 3 [3 favorites]
There is a thesis sitting underneath the snark, though. It gets diluted by forays into taste wars, but the Pulte Homes market- driven house that tends to get roasted has a lot of easy targets for ridicule. 90’s to early 2000’s suburban houses in particular somehow combine the impractical proportions of a 60’s Cadillac with the blandness of a 1995 Camry. I think in the US one of the longest running, most effective forms of satire has involved parody of the nuclear family home. Our “normal” houses in the US aren’t normal - they are not sustainable, they work against creating strong communities, they reinforce social stratification and are massively subsidized by our own government. They’re worth thinking about.
posted by q*ben at 7:01 AM on February 3 [4 favorites]
posted by q*ben at 7:01 AM on February 3 [4 favorites]
Perhaps, we've been into mid-century design for our entire adult lives and find the more recent resurgence (perhaps post-Mad Men?) to be a bit interesting. Sadly it's made buying anything unaffordable as well.
I would argue however, that McMansions don't represent a specific architecture. The mid-century design I'm thinking of has a very specific style and follow a theme - clean lines, minimalist, elegance in simplicity, a focus on livability, light, etc. McMansions seem to be more of a "cobble random crap together" vibe, usually with an emphasis on showing off, hence the wasteful lawyer foyers, stupidly large footprints, excess roof lines, etc. On preview, what tiny frying pan said.
posted by photo guy at 7:13 AM on February 3 [3 favorites]
I would argue however, that McMansions don't represent a specific architecture. The mid-century design I'm thinking of has a very specific style and follow a theme - clean lines, minimalist, elegance in simplicity, a focus on livability, light, etc. McMansions seem to be more of a "cobble random crap together" vibe, usually with an emphasis on showing off, hence the wasteful lawyer foyers, stupidly large footprints, excess roof lines, etc. On preview, what tiny frying pan said.
posted by photo guy at 7:13 AM on February 3 [3 favorites]
Our “normal” houses in the US aren’t normal
I wish I could favorite this ten times. The fact that so, so many Americans have this weird paranoia and cannot bear the thought of being within sight of a neighbor's house does not help either. Seems like everyone in the US wants to build a giant self-contained fortress and cosplay that other people don't exist which is really just kind of sad. No wonder society is in such bad shape.
posted by photo guy at 7:31 AM on February 3 [3 favorites]
I wish I could favorite this ten times. The fact that so, so many Americans have this weird paranoia and cannot bear the thought of being within sight of a neighbor's house does not help either. Seems like everyone in the US wants to build a giant self-contained fortress and cosplay that other people don't exist which is really just kind of sad. No wonder society is in such bad shape.
posted by photo guy at 7:31 AM on February 3 [3 favorites]
What I just thought about, and is blowing my little mind, is that these houses are for sale. Which means someone got paid to stage them. Maybe with giant houses, they leave existing furniture? I know when we have sold houses, most everything is cleaned out before the sale. Also, all the houses around me that have gone on the market, (I go to all the open houses), certainly seem massively staged. So someone brought an art and an peacock...
posted by Windopaene at 7:51 AM on February 3 [1 favorite]
posted by Windopaene at 7:51 AM on February 3 [1 favorite]
Because the McMansion is, IMO, not just hideous but horribly cheap and wasteful. It's kind of an embodiment of everything that is wrong with American consumerism culture - there is zero attempt to be substanable,
This is wrong though. This house is a great example - it was built in 1980, it's 40+ years old. The average mcmansion on Mcmansion Hell is 40+ years old - if they weren't how could she make fun of the '80s decor? They are wasteful, I'm not denying that - I mean 2-3 people in 4000+ sq feet is wasteful. But that has nothing to do with how they are made nor what they look like on the outside.
That's my main problem with McMansion Hell actually - they are no different than any other home and hold their value equally well, and are either well made or well-made enough for some person to like them enough to pay the money to repair them. That mcmansions have smaller setbacks (the mc part of mcmansion) means that they are generally integrated into neighborhoods, I guess compared to actual mansions.
posted by The_Vegetables at 7:53 AM on February 3
This is wrong though. This house is a great example - it was built in 1980, it's 40+ years old. The average mcmansion on Mcmansion Hell is 40+ years old - if they weren't how could she make fun of the '80s decor? They are wasteful, I'm not denying that - I mean 2-3 people in 4000+ sq feet is wasteful. But that has nothing to do with how they are made nor what they look like on the outside.
That's my main problem with McMansion Hell actually - they are no different than any other home and hold their value equally well, and are either well made or well-made enough for some person to like them enough to pay the money to repair them. That mcmansions have smaller setbacks (the mc part of mcmansion) means that they are generally integrated into neighborhoods, I guess compared to actual mansions.
posted by The_Vegetables at 7:53 AM on February 3
It's like someone ate a volume of Architectural Graphic Standards and then vomited it back up...
posted by jim in austin at 8:09 AM on February 3 [1 favorite]
posted by jim in austin at 8:09 AM on February 3 [1 favorite]
I would argue however, that McMansions don't represent a specific architecture. The mid-century design I'm thinking of has a very specific style and follow a theme - clean lines, minimalist, elegance in simplicity, a focus on livability, light, etc. McMansions seem to be more of a "cobble random crap together" vibe, usually with an emphasis on showing off, hence the wasteful lawyer foyers, stupidly large footprints, excess roof lines, etc.
Arguably, those are the exact features that make it such an identifiable architectural style and easy to make fun of. It's been a persistent style, too, with large houses on small lots (i.e., profitable homes for builders) still being built with many of the same recognizable features.
In terms of things cycling back into style, I've been wondering for a while if split-levels will get their turn in the sun. So far, they still seem to be languishing in the unloved-but-practical category.
posted by Dip Flash at 8:59 AM on February 3 [2 favorites]
Arguably, those are the exact features that make it such an identifiable architectural style and easy to make fun of. It's been a persistent style, too, with large houses on small lots (i.e., profitable homes for builders) still being built with many of the same recognizable features.
In terms of things cycling back into style, I've been wondering for a while if split-levels will get their turn in the sun. So far, they still seem to be languishing in the unloved-but-practical category.
posted by Dip Flash at 8:59 AM on February 3 [2 favorites]
I know when we have sold houses, most everything is cleaned out before the sale.
The people in these houses probably aren't moving until the house is sold and the contracts signed. My guess is, nine times out of then, they're either building new or completely renovating an existing home before moving. They can afford to carry two mortgages.
posted by cooker girl at 9:16 AM on February 3
The people in these houses probably aren't moving until the house is sold and the contracts signed. My guess is, nine times out of then, they're either building new or completely renovating an existing home before moving. They can afford to carry two mortgages.
posted by cooker girl at 9:16 AM on February 3
I'm relieved that McMansion Hell is still keeping the faith on "ass" as intensifier.
posted by scruss at 9:46 AM on February 3 [8 favorites]
posted by scruss at 9:46 AM on February 3 [8 favorites]
Love to see a writer transported by their subject. I giggled all the way through. And the house certainly goes way harder than the "impractical proportions of a 60’s Cadillac with the blandness of a 1995 Camry" (spot on, q*Ben), and I respect that.
posted by EvaDestruction at 9:55 AM on February 3
posted by EvaDestruction at 9:55 AM on February 3
I'm relieved that McMansion Hell is still keeping the faith on "ass" as intensifier.
Me too, but I want a hyphen first.
posted by kirkaracha at 10:57 AM on February 3 [1 favorite]
Me too, but I want a hyphen first.
posted by kirkaracha at 10:57 AM on February 3 [1 favorite]
The_Vegetables, 40 years is not old for a house. Maybe that's less a critique of McMansions and more a critique of shitty American build quality (and lack of regulations) but it is true.
And how are they no different than any other home? Most houses on McMansion Hell are 5000+ sq ft of faux-French Rococo ornate over-the-top nonsense. Average people do not live like this, unless my perception of "average" is really screwed up. Also, ignoring the hideous architecture, the massive waste of square footage alone makes them fit for ridicule IMO.
posted by photo guy at 12:21 PM on February 3
And how are they no different than any other home? Most houses on McMansion Hell are 5000+ sq ft of faux-French Rococo ornate over-the-top nonsense. Average people do not live like this, unless my perception of "average" is really screwed up. Also, ignoring the hideous architecture, the massive waste of square footage alone makes them fit for ridicule IMO.
posted by photo guy at 12:21 PM on February 3
Once you see the McMansion window and roofline chaos you can’t unsee it.
This piece by Wagner (Baffler) explains a bit more about the style and issues.
posted by warriorqueen at 2:21 PM on February 3 [1 favorite]
This piece by Wagner (Baffler) explains a bit more about the style and issues.
posted by warriorqueen at 2:21 PM on February 3 [1 favorite]
The quintessential Mcmansions are typically NOT built well. They're made cheap, in quantity, like how McDonald's does burgers & fries. Hence the Mc.
It'd be really boring to just look at the average, awful Mcmansion neighborhoods though so I don't mind seeing the definition stretched to include these kinds of interesting houses. (Ideally there's still some highly questionable rooflines, pointless pillars, utter disregard for balance, a giant front-facing garage, or a total lack of landscape!)
There's this one house in my area that's absolutely gigantic, and behind it are uncounted identical houses in the planned development. I laugh when I pass it because the front looks nice enough but the side (facing the main road!) has one dinky little window.
posted by Baethan at 6:36 PM on February 3 [2 favorites]
It'd be really boring to just look at the average, awful Mcmansion neighborhoods though so I don't mind seeing the definition stretched to include these kinds of interesting houses. (Ideally there's still some highly questionable rooflines, pointless pillars, utter disregard for balance, a giant front-facing garage, or a total lack of landscape!)
There's this one house in my area that's absolutely gigantic, and behind it are uncounted identical houses in the planned development. I laugh when I pass it because the front looks nice enough but the side (facing the main road!) has one dinky little window.
posted by Baethan at 6:36 PM on February 3 [2 favorites]
That's just...bonkers. But, the kind of bonkers I can get behind. It's fully-commited, no-half-assing, bonkers. Like a Fantasuite, but done right. And, I defy anyone to not be ear-to-ear grinning every second you spend in the place.
posted by Thorzdad at 8:25 AM on February 4 [2 favorites]
posted by Thorzdad at 8:25 AM on February 4 [2 favorites]
The exterior rock climbing wall is clearly the only way to bridge the yawning chasm of style and form that was created between the massive boulder stack foundation and the delicate brickwork(?) of Rapunzel's al fresco dining tower! Do you not know these things?! I mean, really, how else would you do it?
I reviewed the drone fly-round imagery and that whole area is really fascinating. I wonder if bats or swallows roost at the top of the tower, it's covered in schmutz. And those boulders are...wowza...huge! It must have taken more than a year to even get those into place.
posted by amanda at 8:36 AM on February 5 [1 favorite]
I reviewed the drone fly-round imagery and that whole area is really fascinating. I wonder if bats or swallows roost at the top of the tower, it's covered in schmutz. And those boulders are...wowza...huge! It must have taken more than a year to even get those into place.
posted by amanda at 8:36 AM on February 5 [1 favorite]
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posted by TedW at 12:21 PM on February 2 [15 favorites]