Comments on: My eyes... the burning...

My eyes... the burning...

jonson — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 19:17:48 -0800

Pour Some Sugar On Me, as reinvisioned by Townsend, a boy band. Some would say it's the worst thing they'd ever seen, but I'd hazard a guess that it may actually be the worst thing ever filmed. The song is enhanced with a rap section, and the video is enhanced with the addition of the jackass from Smashmouth, for some bizarre reason. NSFNSAVI (not safe for the non sight & vision impaired)

By: techgnollogic

techgnollogic — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 19:24:35 -0800

Wow.

By: Tubes

Tubes — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 19:33:21 -0800

I'm not a violent person, but I'm seized with the overwhelming desire to beat each of those kids with a dead carp. I'm pretty sure I could take 'em all at once, too.

By: Quartermass

Quartermass — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 19:36:54 -0800

Holy shit. Speachless. "Im hot, sugar sweet, from my hands to my feet - ya - oo!"

By: keswick

keswick — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 19:39:02 -0800

...Deep.. hurting.... oh, it burns..

By: Quartermass

Quartermass — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 19:42:00 -0800

Perhaps some of this may be in order?

By: a3matrix

a3matrix — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 19:46:12 -0800

That is some kind of sick fucking joke, right? Please tell me it is. That was absolutely unbearable. I'm with Tubes, but I would use a bat.

By: riffola

riffola — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 19:54:10 -0800

It's not a joke, it's real. Trust me it's still better than Mariah Carey doing "Bringing On A HeartbreaK"

By: kenko

kenko — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 19:55:55 -0800

Just me, or is the scene where they're being chased in high speed by the girls a reference to A Hard Day's Night?

By: bobo123

bobo123 — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 19:57:14 -0800

it's the worst thing they'd ever seen, but I'd hazard a guess that it may actually be the worst thing ever filmed. Ugh, I think your right. I couldn't watch more than 30 seconds of it before I had to stop it. I thought I had a strong stomach but that was something else.

By: keswick

keswick — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 19:57:46 -0800

This has got to be a joke. They're not listed in allmusic, there's very few Google results.. It has to be a hoax. Please let it be a hoax?

By: dobbs

dobbs — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 20:00:41 -0800

direct link

By: kenko

kenko — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 20:04:37 -0800

The front man really has no presence.

By: deanc

deanc — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 20:04:56 -0800

My eyes. My eyes. Isn't this an illegal cross-homage by combining a cover of an 80s rock song with a video containing Nirvana-evoking (but cleaned up) cheerleaders? Thankfully, Townsend seems to have broken up, though they have left bad fan sites in their wake.

By: Down10

Down10 — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 20:13:59 -0800

I've seen guys getting each other hand jobs during the San Francisco Gay Pride parade, but this video is still the gayest thing I have ever seen.

By: tomharpel

tomharpel — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 20:15:51 -0800

Isn't that the singer from the unbearable, "Hey now, you're an all star, get your game on" band at the opening of the video, watching the television and looking all tuff?

By: bob sarabia

bob sarabia — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 20:19:57 -0800

tomharpel: yeah, that's the jackass from smashmouth. *ugh*

By: xammerboy

xammerboy — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 20:23:38 -0800

Paired with "Tek" from MTVs RealWorld??? Anyway, yeah, this was the worst video I have ever seen, and I will have to slash my wrists if these guys make it.

By: crazy finger

crazy finger — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 20:32:41 -0800

As if they would let the guy from Smashmouth out of prison so that he could watch this video with Tek and drink beer. Pretty unbelievable.

By: djspicerack

djspicerack — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 20:43:31 -0800

But is it worse than these folks doing a cover of "Photograph?"

By: O9scar

O9scar — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 20:59:30 -0800

Well, it's the Department of Television, Film, Radio and Theater at San Jose State University, so I would argue that Townsend is a fabrication.

By: dobbs

dobbs — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 21:03:10 -0800

But is it worse than these folks doing a cover of "Photograph?" Easily.

By: djspicerack

djspicerack — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 21:05:02 -0800

Figured. Just thought I would attempt to share the pain from when I flipped past that song on the radio and said "hey....I know these lyrics..."

By: iconomy

iconomy — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 21:05:15 -0800

You guys that can't stomach watching it to the end are missing out on something really good. Don't anyone tell them what happens.

By: dryad

dryad — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 21:06:33 -0800

Actually, I thought that the cover of "Working in a Coal Mine" on the Malibu Storm site was a lot worse than "Photograph", but that's just me.

By: mischief

mischief — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 21:33:07 -0800

"it's the worst thing they'd ever seen" Not surprising considering that the song itself is the epitome of corporate rock crap. ;-P

By: badzen

badzen — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 21:44:26 -0800

my eyes.. the goggles do nothing!

By: Feisty

Feisty — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 21:53:31 -0800

Smacks of William Hung. Totally Kick-Ass! "Intro starts and we get all the kids hyped up! We have a pretty good show and follow with a meet n' greet. Then we head off to the office and sign some more autographs for the schools administration. Somehow in the midst of everything that is going on, Matt talks one of the secretaries into giving him a big bag of Hot Tamales, yum!!"

By: zpousman

zpousman — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 21:55:14 -0800

Wow, poor tek. I always wondered what happened to him. Guess that reality TV doesn't always make one a star. Or even an actor. Or even an extra on a non-more-suck-than-suck-itself music video.

By: Galvatron

Galvatron — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 22:01:38 -0800

a boy band Oh. Somehow I missed this phrase and figured Pete Townshend's cover of Leppard would be worth having a look at. I'm... pretty sure Pete wasn't in that video.

By: headspace

headspace — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 22:06:04 -0800

On the upside, they enunciate beautifully, and now I know it's a bubble they're breaking up and not a "humlikeiknowthewords POUR SOME SUGAR ON MEEEEEEE!"

By: rhyax

rhyax — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 22:24:41 -0800

wow, i just watched event horizon last night. tearing out your eyes seems like a valid response.

By: WolfDaddy

WolfDaddy — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 22:36:31 -0800

Apparently Farnsworth was a bit off on his dating the end of the era when BOY BANDS ROAMED THE EARTH! mmmm ... boy bands

By: litlnemo

litlnemo — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 23:10:29 -0800

OMFG. This is hysterical. Great link.

By: skyscraper

skyscraper — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 23:17:23 -0800

Well, gee, I thought it was kinda poppy, kinda cool. My 7-year-old-daughter kinda dug it. Very, very white. Kenko - I think you're right, there was an attempt at filmed Beatles, but they appeared to be more like Moe (#1 Stooge, apart from Iggy).

By: mr.marx

mr.marx — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 23:23:06 -0800

[this is ... eh ... I have no idea] "very, very white" pretty much sums it up. jeebus!

By: stavrosthewonderchicken

stavrosthewonderchicken — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 00:21:25 -0800

Trust me it's still better than Mariah Carey doing "Bringing On A HeartbreaK" Damn you! I'd almost erased the memory of that from my mind!

By: weston

weston — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 00:57:52 -0800

the song itself is the epitome of corporate rock crap. I'd disagree. The song is very well crafted. This video, on the other hand, is a steaming pile of Huckapoo.

By: emelenjr

emelenjr — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 01:15:38 -0800

I love the fact that the girl behind the drums was only using one arm.

By: dobbs

dobbs — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 01:44:18 -0800

Whaddya want, Weston? It's a Huckapoo world! (And for you lucky NY Mefites: tickets go on sale Monday.)

By: holloway

holloway — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 02:42:53 -0800

Matt is a dreamboat.

By: holloway

holloway — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 02:50:24 -0800

Uh yeah, brother and sister, that's what I first thought too.

By: sciurus

sciurus — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 05:40:49 -0800

That poor innocent pug...

By: jonmc

jonmc — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 06:34:25 -0800

As a bunch of wise men once said: "Hold my breath as I wish for death..." *weeps like a little girl*

By: MrMoonPie

MrMoonPie — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 07:39:06 -0800

I saw Millie Jackson do this song live. Much, much better--I felt like she, you know, meant it.

By: mischief

mischief — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 07:43:16 -0800

"well crafted" Crafted? Certainly. Well crafted? Def Leppard was the Journey of hair metal.

By: Johnny Assay

Johnny Assay — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 07:46:03 -0800

The video's shite, yes, but I'm not sure that this replaces Westlife's cover of "Mandy" (yes, the Manilow song) for "worst boy-band cover ever."

By: JanetLand

JanetLand — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 07:47:58 -0800

Oh dear. My street name is Townsend. I'll never get this video out of my head. I must move.

By: chicobangs

chicobangs — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 08:05:19 -0800

I never thought I'd live long enough to type this sentence, but: I really hope Def Leppard is getting paid out of this.

By: jonmc

jonmc — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 08:14:47 -0800

Actually as pop-metal went, Def Leppard were pretty good, basically because they managed to satisfy both sides of the equation. "...Sugar" is far from their best work, but it's a good arena stomper. Def Leppard was the Journey of hair metal. No, there were hair metal bands far more deserving of hatred, like Motley Crue, Winger, and Europe.

By: Ethereal Bligh

Ethereal Bligh — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 08:30:09 -0800

David Boreanaz does a kick-ass cover of Mandy. What?

By: chicobangs

chicobangs — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 08:39:41 -0800

Is David Boreanaz in your living room right now, EB? Did he make you type that?

By: Ethereal Bligh

Ethereal Bligh — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 08:57:01 -0800

He hasn't had much work lately, so he's, you know, been hanging out over here and suggesting various ways to virally market his name. I saw an opportunity and I took it. I'm not evil.

By: KirkJobSluder

KirkJobSluder — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 11:13:53 -0800

Well, to be honest this isn't surprising. Can anyone think of a better song for a group of commercial narcissistic peter-pan wannabes than an 80s commercial anthem of adolescent sexual narcissism?

By: jonmc

jonmc — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 11:19:15 -0800

Well, KJS, to be fair, the guys in Def Leppard managed to make music that made their male sexual narcissism (always a part of rock and roll, anyway) sound convincing whereas the hairless twinks in this boy band couldn't.

By: jjg

jjg — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 11:21:42 -0800

Just me, or is the scene where they're being chased in high speed by the girls a reference to A Hard Day's Night? Definitely just you. Nirvana-evoking (but cleaned up) cheerleaders Also just you. These cheerleaders have almost exactly nothing in common with the cheerleaders in the Nirvana video. Crafted? Certainly. Well crafted? Def Leppard was the Journey of hair metal. Are you suggesting that there was such a thing as authentic, non-commercial hair metal? In their genre, Def Leppard was better than just about everybody else. (The same, actually, could be said of Journey.)

By: jonmc

jonmc — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 11:23:57 -0800

"authentic" and "commercial" are not mutually exclusive terms, jjg.

By: waxpancake

waxpancake — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 11:32:38 -0800

I'm mirroring the file. Feel free to spread this one around, since their server is getting slammed.

By: dejah420

dejah420 — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 11:58:49 -0800

Just me, or is the scene where they're being chased in high speed by the girls a reference to A Hard Day's Night? Definitely a Beatles riff. I think the whole video was designed and filmed as a very clever parody. That's what I'm telling myself. For I refuse to believe that we are having a ressurection of the boyband phenom...

By: KirkJobSluder

KirkJobSluder — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 12:08:52 -0800

jonmc: Well, KJS, to be fair, the guys in Def Leppard managed to make music that made their male sexual narcissism (always a part of rock and roll, anyway) sound convincing whereas the hairless twinks in this boy band couldn't. Perhaps it is just having been jaded from overabundance in high school, but Def Leppard did not sound all that convincing, and tripped well over the line from "well crafted" to "overproduced". From "commercial" to "cynically crafted to maximize marketability."

By: dobbs

dobbs — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 13:06:12 -0800

This is actually worse than that Christian Slater trailer from a week or two ago. (Which the director has taken down now. Anyone got a mirror on that?)

By: chicobangs

chicobangs — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 13:20:35 -0800

Thanks for the mirror on this one, wax. If everyone in the world saw this video, world peace could arrive, if only for as long as we all continued to convulse in horrified laughter.

By: five fresh fish

five fresh fish — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 19:24:08 -0800

I could only watch a bit of it before I had to shut it off. Nonetheless, I'm convinced it was a spoof. It seemed deliberately bad.

By: NortonDC

NortonDC — Sun, 29 Aug 2004 19:48:18 -0800

Jesus, did someone lose a bet?

By: Dreama

Dreama — Mon, 30 Aug 2004 05:11:29 -0800

The boys from Townsend are, if nothing else, excellent role models. I mean, after all, they're all virgins. Otherwise, they couldn't have sung the line "You've got the peaches, I've got the cream" without changing their expressions one tiny bit. They clearly have no idea what it means. Such adorable innocence. Pardon me now, I have to go and vomit.

By: chicobangs

chicobangs — Mon, 30 Aug 2004 07:25:45 -0800

Naw, Dreama, see, here's the genius of the song. Hang with me here for a second. For you, it's a rock and roll horndog's extended metaphor of a come-on, slyly delivered through batted eyelashes and slick boozy ten-minutes-after-last-call lips to some unsuspecting quarry who may have missed her last bus home, and the two tequila shots her best friend did with her aren't completely agreeing with her and whom she's separated from because her friend is waiting outside and there's no cel phone reception in the backstage area, and suddenly everything is one big ball of I'm-not-sure, and yet here right in front of her is this beacon of charisma and I-know-what-you-need with his ever-so-slightly cokey nose just nuzzling the tip of her earlobe and making up these words on the fly, knowing they'll work as long as he can keep her attention long enough for them to make their way into her head, and down through her pleasure zones, one nerve ending at a time, until she melts in a pool at his feet and he mops her up and takes her back to the hotel. Much humping ensues. But for Townsend, it's a song about dessert toppings. Multiple interpretations. There is no right or wrong.