I was wondering if you have a bronze Republican
March 24, 2006 10:33 AM Subscribe
A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop in San Francisco's Chinatown. Picking through the objects on display he discovers a detailed, life- sized bronze sculpture of a rat. The sculpture is so interesting and unique that he picks it up and asks the shop owner what it costs.
"Twelve dollars for the rat, sir," says the shop owner, "and a thousand dollars more for the story behind it."
This post was deleted for the following reason: sucks
I admit the joke is really good, but does it nees an FPP?
posted by sourwookie at 10:36 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by sourwookie at 10:36 AM on March 24, 2006
i listend to that song for four seconds before closing the window.
posted by chococat at 10:36 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by chococat at 10:36 AM on March 24, 2006
The video the picture of the naked woman on the elephant links to is the dumbest song that totally embarrasses me to listen to that I've ever completely agreed with, mostly anyway.
posted by illovich at 10:36 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by illovich at 10:36 AM on March 24, 2006
Lame. Not a bad joke but a lame FPP (substitute Democrat for Republican if it suits you)
posted by substrate at 10:37 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by substrate at 10:37 AM on March 24, 2006
I wonder where I can get a bronze jackspace
*winks*
posted by isopraxis at 10:39 AM on March 24, 2006
*winks*
posted by isopraxis at 10:39 AM on March 24, 2006
sorry, it was a bad post. thumbs down. Now, if we can only get it removed before someone starts srilling about editoralizing and has a major hissy fit over it.
posted by edgeways at 10:39 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by edgeways at 10:39 AM on March 24, 2006
comic sans, indeed
posted by mowglisambo at 10:39 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by mowglisambo at 10:39 AM on March 24, 2006
Christ, this joke is old.
In the newspaper biz, the punchline is "bronze editor."
And the song blows.
posted by CunningLinguist at 10:40 AM on March 24, 2006
In the newspaper biz, the punchline is "bronze editor."
And the song blows.
posted by CunningLinguist at 10:40 AM on March 24, 2006
Jackspace: I actually have always liked this joke, back from when I first heard it about, oh, twenty years ago, when the punchline involved a brass lawyer. And I'm always partial to naked ladies, tho a NSFW warning would have been nice. But I'm curious. Did you post this because you like naked ladies? Or becase you like shaggy dog jokes? Or just wanted to take a shot at Republicans? Because keswick's right.
posted by mojohand at 10:40 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by mojohand at 10:40 AM on March 24, 2006
Now... if Samuel Jackson were somehow involved, or perhaps had read the story aloud...
posted by shoepal at 10:40 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by shoepal at 10:40 AM on March 24, 2006
LCBD. Furthermore, I just lost the game.
posted by By The Grace of God at 10:41 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by By The Grace of God at 10:41 AM on March 24, 2006
Why weren't there a bunch of rats in the store? I mean, did they not know it was there all along?
posted by billysumday at 10:43 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by billysumday at 10:43 AM on March 24, 2006
oh, and btw rats swim very well, so just getting 'em in the water is pointless.
posted by edgeways at 10:44 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by edgeways at 10:44 AM on March 24, 2006
omg flagged
posted by thirteenkiller at 10:47 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by thirteenkiller at 10:47 AM on March 24, 2006
I liked the joke even if I have heard it before. Perhaps the fact that it involved a bronze liberal last time has something to do with it. In any event, I am hoping that Dear Leader will edit this post to include a NSFW tag. If you are lucky he will take the punch line out of the title.
posted by caddis at 10:48 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by caddis at 10:48 AM on March 24, 2006
Owner: But it comes with a free Frogurt!
Homer: That's good!
Owner: The Frogurt is also cursed.
Homer: That's bad.
posted by phirleh at 10:49 AM on March 24, 2006
Homer: That's good!
Owner: The Frogurt is also cursed.
Homer: That's bad.
posted by phirleh at 10:49 AM on March 24, 2006
Time to break out the old "You suck and your post sucks and I hate you over the internet" .
posted by boo_radley at 10:50 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by boo_radley at 10:50 AM on March 24, 2006
edgeways writes "oh, and btw rats swim very well, so just getting 'em in the water is pointless."
What about Republicans?
posted by orthogonality at 10:52 AM on March 24, 2006
What about Republicans?
posted by orthogonality at 10:52 AM on March 24, 2006
"christ that was lame."
True. Brass pug would've been way better.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 10:54 AM on March 24, 2006
True. Brass pug would've been way better.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 10:54 AM on March 24, 2006
orthogonality: i dunno, but Teddy is helluva swimmer. Driver? Not so much.
posted by keswick at 10:57 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by keswick at 10:57 AM on March 24, 2006
Well if one wants to make jokes of Republicans that's fine, but damn If I find the link to be entertaining..it's pure low grade smear, FP style.
posted by elpapacito at 10:57 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by elpapacito at 10:57 AM on March 24, 2006
When I read the first paragraph, I was hoping for something like this:
I was very let down.
posted by brundlefly at 10:58 AM on March 24, 2006
I was very let down.
posted by brundlefly at 10:58 AM on March 24, 2006
I too was hoping for some sort of Gremlins connection. Still, that woman sure exhausted that elephant, eh?
posted by stinkycheese at 11:08 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by stinkycheese at 11:08 AM on March 24, 2006
Thanks for the NSFW link. Just what I needed to look at while at work. Oh and let's add lame post while we're at it...
posted by Mave_80 at 11:13 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by Mave_80 at 11:13 AM on March 24, 2006
"comic sans, indeed"
well at least mowglisambo knows humor
posted by Phantast at 11:17 AM on March 24, 2006
well at least mowglisambo knows humor
posted by Phantast at 11:17 AM on March 24, 2006
1) As mojohand says, this joke is funny when its punchline involves lawyers. Substitute "Republicans" and you're left with yet another soggy bag of attempted political humor. "OMG, it mentions Republicans, and I hate Republicans, so it must be TEH FUNNAY!"
2) As chococat says, you put the punchline in the title. You don't have have the sense God gave a duck.
Don't go whining when this post is deleted.
posted by languagehat at 11:17 AM on March 24, 2006
2) As chococat says, you put the punchline in the title. You don't have have the sense God gave a duck.
Don't go whining when this post is deleted.
posted by languagehat at 11:17 AM on March 24, 2006
If you are lucky he will take the punch line out of the title.
But that's the tip off that jackspace deliberately intended to make a post this deeply awful.
posted by jack_mo at 11:24 AM on March 24, 2006
But that's the tip off that jackspace deliberately intended to make a post this deeply awful.
posted by jack_mo at 11:24 AM on March 24, 2006
Frogurt also came to my mind.
posted by fire&wings at 11:25 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by fire&wings at 11:25 AM on March 24, 2006
Today I read the joke and substituted "bronze people who think the best place to stop and have a cellphone conversation is at the top of a down escalator" for "bronze Republicans" and considering the group of people I'm peeved at today, it came out funny.
posted by Spatch at 11:27 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by Spatch at 11:27 AM on March 24, 2006
No. That's just frost on my mustache.
posted by Armitage Shanks at 11:29 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by Armitage Shanks at 11:29 AM on March 24, 2006
I think between the nudity, the presence of an elephant, the song, the joke, and the comic sans font there's a strong argument to be made that this is in fact the best of the web.
posted by nixerman at 11:30 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by nixerman at 11:30 AM on March 24, 2006
I think between the nudity, the presence of an elephant, the song, the joke, and the comic sans font there's a strong argument to be made that this is in fact the best of the web.
...circa 1997
posted by pardonyou? at 11:33 AM on March 24, 2006
...circa 1997
posted by pardonyou? at 11:33 AM on March 24, 2006
I would like to take time from my bizzy day to alert the person who posted this link that I do not like it. Hopefully this person will get this message and never ever make such a poor contribution. As I see it, this does two things, 1. it puts poster on notice of qualitylessness and makes me feel better about upgrading the future of the internets. Hopefully my kids won't have to suffer through what I have.
posted by hatchetjack at 11:39 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by hatchetjack at 11:39 AM on March 24, 2006
I liked the joke, I was amused by the picture, I saw it at work and didn't get fired, I avoided the song....the font didn't really bother me...
I'm looking for something to complain about (so as to be part of the cool kid crowd) but can't find anything...
oh wait..I know... I really didn't care for the background on the page much....
posted by HuronBob at 11:44 AM on March 24, 2006
I'm looking for something to complain about (so as to be part of the cool kid crowd) but can't find anything...
oh wait..I know... I really didn't care for the background on the page much....
posted by HuronBob at 11:44 AM on March 24, 2006
...and the grasshopper replies, "You have a drink named Henry?!"
posted by lord_wolf at 11:50 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by lord_wolf at 11:50 AM on March 24, 2006
... then the nun says "Hot dogs? I thought you said wieners!"
posted by mr_crash_davis at 11:51 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by mr_crash_davis at 11:51 AM on March 24, 2006
By The Grace of God writes "Furthermore, I just lost the game."
OOOooooooohhhhh! I hate you!
posted by Fezboy! at 11:52 AM on March 24, 2006
OOOooooooohhhhh! I hate you!
posted by Fezboy! at 11:52 AM on March 24, 2006
... and the yokel says "I don't think I could stand 67 more of those."
posted by Floydd at 11:53 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by Floydd at 11:53 AM on March 24, 2006
I liked the joke, except for the generic, hot-swappable punchline. Although if we ended it with, "Do you have a brass politician?" I think we could all agree on the humor.
posted by Faint of Butt at 11:53 AM on March 24, 2006
posted by Faint of Butt at 11:53 AM on March 24, 2006
I want these motherfucking snakes off the motherfucking plane!
(Did I do that right?)
posted by Ynoxas at 12:00 PM on March 24, 2006
(Did I do that right?)
posted by Ynoxas at 12:00 PM on March 24, 2006
so the nun says "fifty bucks, same as in town."
posted by Cookiebastard at 12:02 PM on March 24, 2006
posted by Cookiebastard at 12:02 PM on March 24, 2006
Faint of Butt: "Although if we ended it with, "Do you have a brass politician?" I think we could all agree on the humor."
Those clowns in Congress have done it again!
posted by Plutor at 12:03 PM on March 24, 2006
Those clowns in Congress have done it again!
posted by Plutor at 12:03 PM on March 24, 2006
What a bunch of clowns.
posted by Faint of Butt at 12:24 PM on March 24, 2006
posted by Faint of Butt at 12:24 PM on March 24, 2006
No soap, radio!
posted by Faint of Butt at 12:44 PM on March 24, 2006
posted by Faint of Butt at 12:44 PM on March 24, 2006
"Harelip! Harelip!"
An excellent old joke.
posted by Turtles all the way down at 12:46 PM on March 24, 2006
An excellent old joke.
posted by Turtles all the way down at 12:46 PM on March 24, 2006
How does he keep up with the news like that?
posted by mowglisambo at 12:48 PM on March 24, 2006
posted by mowglisambo at 12:48 PM on March 24, 2006
The dumpster at Sloan-Kettering Memorial Hospital.
posted by Armitage Shanks at 12:48 PM on March 24, 2006
posted by Armitage Shanks at 12:48 PM on March 24, 2006
"And the dog says, 'You think I should have said DiMaggio?'"
"I wanted him to be a doctor."
"I never had the five bucks before."
"Yeah, but now I can't get him to stop!"
posted by kyrademon at 12:51 PM on March 24, 2006
"I wanted him to be a doctor."
"I never had the five bucks before."
"Yeah, but now I can't get him to stop!"
posted by kyrademon at 12:51 PM on March 24, 2006
Damn.
Ooh! Ooh! I know that one! "What did the beaver say when he saw a pile of sticks blocking the river?"
posted by pardonyou? at 1:00 PM on March 24, 2006
Ooh! Ooh! I know that one! "What did the beaver say when he saw a pile of sticks blocking the river?"
posted by pardonyou? at 1:00 PM on March 24, 2006
A stick.
posted by Armitage Shanks at 1:02 PM on March 24, 2006
posted by Armitage Shanks at 1:02 PM on March 24, 2006
oh-- "that's not a halo--it's a steering wheel!" ; >
posted by amberglow at 1:13 PM on March 24, 2006
posted by amberglow at 1:13 PM on March 24, 2006
"Why should I open it? It's probably just another fuckin' hat."
posted by chococat at 1:15 PM on March 24, 2006
posted by chococat at 1:15 PM on March 24, 2006
"Dopey fucked a penguin, Dopey fucked a penguin!"
posted by Divine_Wino at 1:22 PM on March 24, 2006
posted by Divine_Wino at 1:22 PM on March 24, 2006
Being unfamiliar with the joke, I am the lamest guy on the planet acuz I laughed. I am a simpleton, but with the grace of the Goob Lorb, one day I hope to be as hep and enlightened as the rest of all y'allz.
Braise Bejesus!
posted by eener at 1:32 PM on March 24, 2006
Braise Bejesus!
posted by eener at 1:32 PM on March 24, 2006
"He had a hat."
"Well, maybe somebody will come."
"Mate, fetch me my brown pants."
"Ze cat!"
posted by Faint of Butt at 1:35 PM on March 24, 2006
"Well, maybe somebody will come."
"Mate, fetch me my brown pants."
"Ze cat!"
posted by Faint of Butt at 1:35 PM on March 24, 2006
rectum? damn near killed 'em!
what's wrong with you? you're making love like a damn chinaman!
posted by shmegegge at 1:40 PM on March 24, 2006
what's wrong with you? you're making love like a damn chinaman!
posted by shmegegge at 1:40 PM on March 24, 2006
I would, but we need the eggs.
posted by sonofsamiam at 1:43 PM on March 24, 2006
posted by sonofsamiam at 1:43 PM on March 24, 2006
If I knew it was gonna be this kind of thread, I'd have stuck my dick in the mashed potatoes!
posted by keswick at 1:43 PM on March 24, 2006
posted by keswick at 1:43 PM on March 24, 2006
Where do you think lawyers come from?
posted by Kirth Gerson at 1:48 PM on March 24, 2006
posted by Kirth Gerson at 1:48 PM on March 24, 2006
Did you think I asked for a 12 inch pianist?
posted by brundlefly at 1:52 PM on March 24, 2006
posted by brundlefly at 1:52 PM on March 24, 2006
Why weren't there a bunch of rats in the store? I mean, did they not know it was there all along?
...hey, yeah, wait a minute! This joke doesn't even make any damn sense.
That is, unless you employ the Straussian ReadingTM which reveals the hidden secret joke too funny for the masses.
posted by sonofsamiam at 1:52 PM on March 24, 2006
...hey, yeah, wait a minute! This joke doesn't even make any damn sense.
That is, unless you employ the Straussian ReadingTM which reveals the hidden secret joke too funny for the masses.
posted by sonofsamiam at 1:52 PM on March 24, 2006
Nice FPP and lack of NSFW warning, asswipe.
posted by mrblondemang at 1:54 PM on March 24, 2006
posted by mrblondemang at 1:54 PM on March 24, 2006
still, you have to admit the post delivered a pretty solid result, which I shall henceforth refer to as the Portabella Effect.
posted by mowglisambo at 2:02 PM on March 24, 2006
posted by mowglisambo at 2:02 PM on March 24, 2006
mrblondemang takes really long lunches.
posted by Armitage Shanks at 2:03 PM on March 24, 2006
posted by Armitage Shanks at 2:03 PM on March 24, 2006
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PS: This post sucks.
posted by keswick at 10:35 AM on March 24, 2006