"Because the internet needs prophylactics for memetically transmitted diseases."

October 18, 2007 12:17 AM

StupidFilter is a work in progress which aims to recognize online stupidity programmatically. Keep in mind we grade stupidity on a scale of 1 to 5. Someone might get a 1 or 2 for a comment that used no punctuation, whereas a comment consisting of nothing but text message abbreviations with a dash of LOLLLLL thrown in for good measure would probably rate a solid 4 or 5. There is a certain amount of subjectivity, and our software is aware of that; scoring will be normalized to eliminate excessively generous or harsh estimations of stupidity. Read some examples of "the tyranny of idiocy" in their collection of Random Stupidity .
posted by amyms (65 comments total)

Welcome to the best Mefi thread ever.
Please, be seated, and keep your hands and arms inside the thread. This will Wendell.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 12:21 AM on October 18, 2007

Are all the worst examples from YouTube? Does the Pope wear a funny hat?
posted by shakespeherian at 12:30 AM on October 18, 2007

Get yer coupons!
posted by maxwelton at 12:35 AM on October 18, 2007 [2 favorites]

Ah, a girl can dream...
posted by jrochest at 12:38 AM on October 18, 2007

Source
youtube

Source
youtube

Source
youtube

I sense a pattern.
posted by Brittanie at 12:43 AM on October 18, 2007

MOAR
posted by loquacious at 12:47 AM on October 18, 2007

I don't get it.
posted by Wolof at 1:05 AM on October 18, 2007

i think ur land got fuck by OTTOMAN EMPIRE too thats why r u sad this much:D idiot u dont know anything about history?? or facts??? u go back to ur pity life ur intelligent mind cant understand somethings:D little brain shut ur disgusting chin up WHO CARE WITH FUCKING EUROPE?:DDDDDDDD
posted by revfitz at 1:10 AM on October 18, 2007

Prescriptivist = super smart! LOL!

</prematurebacklash>
posted by whir at 1:13 AM on October 18, 2007

Hmm. Wonder what would happen if you fed that algorithm some E. E. Cummings?
posted by tomsk at 1:19 AM on October 18, 2007

MOAR!!!!!
posted by mr. strange at 1:29 AM on October 18, 2007

lol

(USER WAS AUTOBANNED FOR THIS POST)
posted by Bletch at 1:31 AM on October 18, 2007

Shouldn't this go in Projects?

If it's already there, shouldn't it stay there?
posted by chillmost at 1:33 AM on October 18, 2007

Are all the worst examples from YouTube?

Yeah, it does seem to be very YouTube-centric right now. I guess they decided to start with a guaranteed bastion of idiotic comments before branching out.

I wonder what results they'll get if they ever apply their algorithm to Mefi. From their FAQ page: ...even if an allegedly-smart person makes a short, stupid comment, their smartness doesn't make the comment any less stupid.
posted by amyms at 1:39 AM on October 18, 2007

Shouldn't this go in Projects?

Projects is for members to post their own projects.

From the Projects front page: MeFi Projects is dedicated to helping MetaFilter members announce their new web projects to the world.

I don't know if the people behind StupidFilter are Mefites, but, if they are, they haven't posted it.
posted by amyms at 1:42 AM on October 18, 2007 [1 favorite]

PLEASE DONT READ THIS. YOU WILL GET KISSED ON THE NEAREST POSSIBLE FRIDAY BY THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE. TOMORROW WILL BE THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE. HOWEVER IF YOU DONT POST THIS COMMENT TO AT LEAST 3 VIDEOS YOU WILL DIE WITHIN 2 DAYS. NOW UV STARTED READIN DIS DUNT STOP THIS IS SO SCARY. SEND THIS OVER TO 5 VIDEOS IN 143 MINUTES WHEN UR DONE PRESS F6 AND UR CRUSHES NAME WILL APPEAR ON THE SCREEN IN BIG LETTERS. THIS IS SO SCARY BECAUSE IT ACTUALLY WORKs

5 out of 5!
posted by algreer at 1:47 AM on October 18, 2007

MetaFilter already has its own version of this.
posted by Brittanie at 2:07 AM on October 18, 2007 [6 favorites]

UR STUPDMETER IS ONLY WOT CAN B MADE BY PPLS ON KRAK U MORONZ LOL!!!1! GET A LIFE U RETARTS U PROBLY DONT EVENHAVE A GRLFREIND OR U WUD B FUKING HER NOT FUKING UR COMPUTER LOLZ!!11! OR IF U HAD GLRFREIND SHE WUD B WIV ME BECOZ UR SO LAME U DUM FAGGOT LOZR!!!1!1!
posted by UbuRoivas at 2:43 AM on October 18, 2007

If a LOOOOL is a 4 or a 5, they will soon have to expand their scale.
posted by CautionToTheWind at 2:53 AM on October 18, 2007

well, shit...I'm caught!
posted by HuronBob at 3:14 AM on October 18, 2007

wtf wat an rtard

4 for stupidity. I'd give it 5 for irony.
posted by slimepuppy at 3:28 AM on October 18, 2007 [2 favorites]

StupidFilter is blind to irony LOL.
posted by Samuel Farrow at 3:30 AM on October 18, 2007

It continues:we consider the StupidFilter's irony-ignorance to be a feature.

Gold.
posted by Samuel Farrow at 3:35 AM on October 18, 2007

And your proof is? Or did you think that one up after smoking your weed? Dumb ass
posted by three blind mice at 3:35 AM on October 18, 2007

Oh no! If Matt implements this on Metafilter, I'm completely fucked.

"What about ironic uses of "stupid" diction?"

What about I hit you with this ironic bar if you don't get down on your knees and suck my stupid diction?
posted by PeterMcDermott at 3:36 AM on October 18, 2007

DAMN!!! I couldn't think of the pickles pickles part (LOVED the Robot Chicken star wars thing! LOLOLOL)
posted by Samuel Farrow at 3:41 AM on October 18, 2007

i dont think it is haram... brothers calm down.. there is no bad words in it or any sexual thing or any swear-bad languae? no! it just explains everyone that how we Muslims rejoice such wonderful blessed day!!! and everybody needs to learn it...it teaches -doesnt cause haram...soo those who think it is haram are wrong in my opinion. SALAMS.

Stupid rating: 3
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 3:54 AM on October 18, 2007

swear-bad languae?

i jst lyk 2 say swear-bad languae.

swear-bad languae!
swear-bad languae!
swear-bad languae!
posted by quonsar at 4:01 AM on October 18, 2007 [1 favorite]

Is it really necessary to find and concentrate all online stupidity at one site? This takes away the fun of discovery, of stepping blindly into a minefield of LOLOLZ.

I'm afraid it wil attainz a critical mass of stupidity and suck nearby domain in, eventually becoming a super black hole unLESS UR A FAGG AND DONT TAKE THING SO SIREOSLY?????LOL U SUX UH OH I FEEL KINDA STRANG
posted by not_on_display at 4:30 AM on October 18, 2007 [1 favorite]

If this innovation will allow me to read the IMDB message boards without wanting to stick a sharpened screwdriver in my ear, I'm all for it.
posted by kittens for breakfast at 4:32 AM on October 18, 2007 [4 favorites]

Oh hai!

I can has dis commentz auto-filtrd out?

Kthxbai!
posted by jgbustos at 4:42 AM on October 18, 2007

Is it really necessary to find and concentrate all online stupidity at one site?

Well, yes, Encyclopedia Dramatica is great!
posted by soundofsuburbia at 4:45 AM on October 18, 2007

i order you to be eaten by me
lol =)
posted by Flashman at 5:03 AM on October 18, 2007

Aha! The next big reality tv gameshow! Five randomly selected YouTube commenters are trotted out on stage to be judged by the StupidBot. To defend themselves, they must show either irony or a functioning grasp of the written english language. The two worst performers are summoned to a panel of experts in grammar, spelling, composition, and a subject-matter expert on whatever idiocy they've gotten themselves into.

The winner, and therefore stupidest commenter involved, is promoted to CEO of a major television company.
posted by Skorgu at 5:05 AM on October 18, 2007

WTF humanity? LOL... er... *HURL*
posted by Devils Rancher at 5:32 AM on October 18, 2007

StupidFilter released. Icanhascheezburger.com explodes.
posted by desjardins at 5:51 AM on October 18, 2007

HOLY SHIT UPSIDE DOWN PICTURES LIOLOLOLOLOL ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this gave me enough fuel to drive my ROFLCOPTER all day long, go kill yourself this isnt funny in the least

ROFLCOPTER. Want.
posted by spinturtle at 6:08 AM on October 18, 2007

While I get many a smile/frown from reading newspeak, I don't need someone to collect these gems for me -- they aren't too hard to find in the first place.

(ROFLCOPTER's a good one, very memorable.)
posted by not_on_display at 6:18 AM on October 18, 2007

ID: 34327
Rating: 4

everytime i watch this i cry, i never get to see my dad, he's in the military and if i'm lucky i get to see i'm once a year for a few days!

I think Michelle Malkin wrote this algorithm.
posted by dsword at 6:20 AM on October 18, 2007

I put on my robe and wizard hat
posted by damo at 6:24 AM on October 18, 2007

FAIL
posted by triv at 6:24 AM on October 18, 2007

Once they have a sufficiently ignorant data set to work with, hopefully they'll release a Mozilla plug-in to autogenerate profound stupidity so that Youtubers and Myspace twats can breeze through their online interactions with even less thought. Simply by clicking options such as "TEH SUCK", "I HAT U BICH", "LOL", "U RACEST", "KILL FAG", "OMG U HAWT", "U LIBURAL ALL RETARD", or the perennial favorite "ME TOO!" one will generate the full range of the content free comments that used to take people moments of effort and intense contemplation to create.

...in the years beyond 2000.
posted by bunnytricks at 6:30 AM on October 18, 2007

or the perennial favorite "ME TOO!"

I've just realised... I kinda miss ME TOO. Whatever happened to it?
posted by Leon at 7:06 AM on October 18, 2007

I'M IN UR BASE, BEING BELONGED TO BY US
posted by e.e. coli at 7:10 AM on October 18, 2007 [1 favorite]

I kinda miss ME TOO. Whatever happened to it?

it was diagnosed as schizophrenic 6 months ago
posted by pyramid termite at 7:11 AM on October 18, 2007

This is stupid.

...and the ratings should go up to 11
posted by jaronson at 7:14 AM on October 18, 2007

"lol awesome as usual"
Score: 3

Grade inflation strikes again.
posted by oddman at 7:29 AM on October 18, 2007

WHEN U R READING THIS DONT STOP OR SOMETHING BAD WILL HAPPEN MY NAME IS SUMMER I AM 15 YEARS OLD i have BLONDE HAIR , SCARS no NOSE OR EARS I AM DEAD IF U DONT COPY THIS JUS LIKE FROM THE RING COPY N POST THIS ON 5 MORE SITES OR I WILL APPEAR ONE CREEPY NIGHT WEN UR NOT ExPECTING IT BY YOUR BED WITH A NIFE AND KILL U THIS IS NO JOKE SUMMET ING GOOD WILL HAPPEN TO U IF YOU POST THIS ON 5 MORE FLASH BOXES

gets 4 out of 5, but this:

love it and love all her somgs that she made in history!!! well ppl that iz making bad comments.. plz stop becuase whats the point?! not like hilary will actually see this and notice that she is bad dum dums!!

gets a 5? I call shenanigans, and contend that they're going to need to push it up to a 10-point scale when they get to the threads on the moon landing/Hillary.

Also, I look forward to the implementation of this as a CAPTCHA-type step in submitting comments:

Unusual stupidity detected in this submission. Please correctly diagram the following sentence, randomly selected from the collected works of Hemingway, to verify baseline cognitive ability.
posted by Mayor West at 7:29 AM on October 18, 2007 [1 favorite]

man u know wa the dude is right at age 5 u yall was sucking ur thump and probaly still doing potty training u think most of yall can even under the nob'z and faders i give him prop'z u think tony hawk can skate good when he was 5? hater'z this days

Score 5, obviously.
posted by edverb at 7:31 AM on October 18, 2007

I've just realised... I kinda miss ME TOO. Whatever happened to it?

IAWTP
posted by kurumi at 7:38 AM on October 18, 2007

let's face it, this is the dumbest generation in american history, and youtube is their favorite website.
posted by bruce at 7:42 AM on October 18, 2007

MY NAME IS SUMMER I AM 15 YEARS OLD i have BLONDE HAIR , SCARS no NOSE OR EARS I AM DEAD

It could just be me, but I think the all caps/bad grammar here lends this an air of authenticity that makes it considerably creepier than it has any real right to be. That said:

POST THIS ON 5 MORE SITES OR I WILL APPEAR ONE CREEPY NIGHT WEN UR NOT ExPECTING IT BY YOUR BED WITH A NIFE AND KILL U THIS IS NO JOKE SUMMET ING GOOD WILL HAPPEN TO U IF YOU POST THIS ON 5 MORE FLASH BOXES

Clearly, Summer, my scarred/noseless/earless/dead dear, nothing very good has happened to you. Something doesn't quite add up...
posted by kittens for breakfast at 7:49 AM on October 18, 2007

SO YEAH, SOMEONE MADE THIS ABOUT ME. DO YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT THIS? NO? THATS RIGHT YOU DON'T. YOU DON'T KNOW SHIT. I MEAN, IT'S SUPPOSED TO INSULT ME BUT LISTEN, THERE IS NO (FUCK I WISH I COULD CAPS LOCK THAT BUT I AM ALREADY IN MAXIMUM CAPS LOCK) SUCH THING AS BAD PUBLICITY. I AM FAMOSE. THAT'S RIGHT. FAMOSE. YOU NOOBS SHOULD ALL TAKE TRIPCODES AND SEE IF YOU CAN BECOME MORE FAMOSE THAN ME. YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU CAN'T. THAT'S RIGHT. BECAUSE I'M THE FUCKING EPIC FIRST POST GUY. I TAKE FIRST POSTS. I TAKE FIRST POSTS SO FAST YOUR MOMMA IS A HOE. TRY BEAT ME, I CHALLENGE YOU. ALSO, FUCK ANONYMOUS. TRIPCODEPWNERERS FTW.
posted by goatdog at 8:02 AM on October 18, 2007

This isn't really a StupidFilter. It's a BanalFilter.

Truely stupid people and ideas that it would be nice for them to detect, but they present their arugments in such a way as to be misleadingly intelligent.

For example.

However, that tagline is sheer genius: "Because the internet needs prophylactics for memetically transmitted diseases."

It's the kind of tagline you repeat to other people to make yourself seem clever. I had to cut and paste it.

However, they should have capitolized Internet.
posted by jeffamaphone at 9:05 AM on October 18, 2007

And in my attempt to not be stupid, I composed a sentence that makes no grammatical sense. Oh well. I'm just getting into my first cup of coffee.
posted by jeffamaphone at 9:08 AM on October 18, 2007

Proposal:

Want to comment on Youtube? Please affix this FREE explosive neck collar as seen on The Running Man. Your comment will be passed to this filter. A failure value will result in detonation.
posted by snailer at 9:49 AM on October 18, 2007

lol
posted by Citizen Premier at 9:51 AM on October 18, 2007

Oh hey guys. This is one of my little projects. I was planning to post this to Projects when it was a little closer to complete, but it leaked to Reddit and I've been dealing with the media onslaught ever since. Would you believe I got interviewed by Fortune magazine?
posted by signalnine at 10:11 AM on October 18, 2007

Half of the random comments that come up for me are by someone named djsparkydog.

He's like a one-man stupid wrecking ball.
posted by Astro Zombie at 10:15 AM on October 18, 2007

So yes, everything so far is from Youtube because a) it's stupidity-dense and b) it was ridiculously easy to write a comment scraper for Youtube. Other scrapers are being written, so the database should grow and become more diverse.

Yeah, it's somewhat prescriptivist. Get over it.

The comments ratings are kind of all over the place, I plan to apply some normalization, some of my moderators grade excessively harshly, some too lightly. It's gonna get fixed.

Keep in mind that initially I'm just looking for deviation from standard written English. Eventually, I should have a large enough corpus of correlational data that I'll be able to start to recognize more advanced forms of stupid using something like a hidden Markov model.
posted by signalnine at 10:20 AM on October 18, 2007

Some people aren't really stupid at all who post stupid posts.
Some people drink alcohol and they post drunk.
Some people do drugs and they Post-Toasties.
posted by doctorschlock at 10:25 AM on October 18, 2007

That Markov thing Brittanie pointed out is exLOLent! It makes you smart. For instance, I know facts:
5' 8" and 152 is not a bunch of carjackers.

And I give solid advice:
This kid is 21 years old, just get away for a urine culture.

It needed to be said.
posted by Don Pepino at 10:26 AM on October 18, 2007

wtf wat an rtard

I am so smart! I am so smart! S-M-R-T! I mean S-M-A-R-T!
posted by Zinger at 10:37 AM on October 18, 2007

I think the problem with this thing is that they are calling it StupidFilter when they really should be calling it something like GrammarAndSpellingAndSmileyLOLFilter.Of course, it is easy to programatically detect these errors. If we make the assumption that somebody who writes something that is mostly LOLz and ;-) is stupid, we can simply count the spelling errors, LOLz, and crude ascii graphics and assign them a stupidity value based on the tally versus the average.

But that's no fun at all.

What would be infinitely more interesting albeit infinitely more difficult is a program that actually detects flaws in logic, incorrect statements and other types of flaws that actually make some body of text seem stupid.

The next step would be to update the routers on the internet to recognize and silently drop all the stupid traffic on the internet. This would cut instant messenger traffic down to about .005% of current levels, and if only we could feed some kind of image and audio processing engines into our stupidity buster Youtube would also cease to exist.

Looking back to the 90s our problems started when we thought we needed to break the "barriers that prevent the masses from getting onto the information superhighway" and thereby let all the stupid people near the internet, creating the problems of today.
posted by Sukiari at 5:05 PM on October 18, 2007

This will go great in the Human Being timecapsule to be discovered by future species.
posted by Curry at 12:27 PM on October 23, 2007