"Quiet please. I'm having trouble following the plot."
August 17, 2008 11:35 AM Subscribe
Unintentionally funny blog of the day. Blogger suggests "child-free" movie theaters, citing his experience while attending a super-hero movie.
Tomorrow's unintentionally funny blog: livingoprah.com
Tomorrow's unintentionally funny blog: livingoprah.com
This post was deleted for the following reason: This is like a double Nelson-failure thing here. Personally disliking a couple of blogs != good front page material. -- cortex
Your emphasis suggests that you think super-hero movies are primarily for children. If so, please explain why.
posted by chudmonkey at 11:42 AM on August 17, 2008
posted by chudmonkey at 11:42 AM on August 17, 2008
Are you suggesting that super-hero movies are only made for small children? Because I think that most people here would disagree with that assessment.
posted by ColdChef at 11:43 AM on August 17, 2008
posted by ColdChef at 11:43 AM on August 17, 2008
And furthermore, I'll be the first to sign up for "adult-only" screenings. It would certainly make the screenings of new Pixar films much more enjoyable. *shakes fist at small children*
posted by ColdChef at 11:45 AM on August 17, 2008 [2 favorites]
posted by ColdChef at 11:45 AM on August 17, 2008 [2 favorites]
Oh for crying out loud, don't ask him to explain it further. Just keep flagging it until it goes away.
posted by nanojath at 11:45 AM on August 17, 2008 [2 favorites]
posted by nanojath at 11:45 AM on August 17, 2008 [2 favorites]
Behind me, a group of 6-12 year olds, accompanied by their mother, talking throughout the bulk of the film because they just couldn’t keep up with the plot.
Man goes to see film that appeals to 6-12 year olds and then complains that the audience acts like 6-12 year olds.
Pity one of the 6 year olds didn't tell him to grow up.
posted by three blind mice at 11:46 AM on August 17, 2008 [1 favorite]
Man goes to see film that appeals to 6-12 year olds and then complains that the audience acts like 6-12 year olds.
Pity one of the 6 year olds didn't tell him to grow up.
posted by three blind mice at 11:46 AM on August 17, 2008 [1 favorite]
I don't see what point you're making? Some people don't want to be around kids... It's a legitimate point; that's why there are specific clubs that have age limits above and beyond the minimum drinking age. Paying $X to go see a movie and wanting to be able to enjoy the experience, rather than fume about someone's aggravated child -- how is that a point worthy of derision? (Arguments as to how the viewpoint is expressed, aside.)
I'm an adult, and I like super-hero movies. I also don't care to spend time in the company of other people's children.
PS - funny is very subjective.
posted by Dark Messiah at 11:46 AM on August 17, 2008 [1 favorite]
I'm an adult, and I like super-hero movies. I also don't care to spend time in the company of other people's children.
PS - funny is very subjective.
posted by Dark Messiah at 11:46 AM on August 17, 2008 [1 favorite]
So I flagged this as 'other'. Why don't we have a 'noise' flag for the front page?
posted by delmoi at 11:48 AM on August 17, 2008
posted by delmoi at 11:48 AM on August 17, 2008
The best experience about watching Wall-E in the theatre was the muffled delighted squeaks from the kids in the audience with us. But then, Wall-E was an appropriate movie for children that they can get absorbed into. Go to the late show, otherwise, and enjoy your protracted adolescent consumption in like company.
posted by Space Coyote at 11:51 AM on August 17, 2008 [3 favorites]
posted by Space Coyote at 11:51 AM on August 17, 2008 [3 favorites]
My personal experience in Canada leads me to feel that teens and twenty-somethings (the group to which I belong) are far more annoying. They're always taking their phones out to check messages, they have loud conversations before the movie starts with little regard for vulgar content, they smoke a joint before the show and smell up the place, and they leave all their snack packaging behind, leaving one to navigate a treacherous path to the aisle.
One day I'll stop behaving like this.
posted by chudmonkey at 11:52 AM on August 17, 2008
One day I'll stop behaving like this.
posted by chudmonkey at 11:52 AM on August 17, 2008
This is a crap fpp. We have premium theaters here in chicago that are child-free. These theaters are showing the dark knight right now. Theres no unintentional comedy here. DK is not made for the under 10 set.
posted by damn dirty ape at 11:52 AM on August 17, 2008
posted by damn dirty ape at 11:52 AM on August 17, 2008
I think Zambrano skimmed over this in the article:
Iron Man is a 12A certificate, the official definition of which as being suitable for people 12 years and older and that no children under 12 will be allowed in, unless accompanied by an adult. The problem the BBFC has long had is that since the introduction of the 12 certificate for Batman, the pressure to give films a sub-15 rating is huge and Iron Man is a perfect example of falling between two stools. Not gritty enough to be a 15, yet tougher in general themes and violence than a PG. By giving itself that ‘unless accompanied by an adult’ get out clause, the BBFC has effectively absolved some of its responsibility to the general public. The problem with that is that much of the general public, bless ‘em, are incapable of making that decision for themselves.
posted by Pendragon at 11:52 AM on August 17, 2008
Iron Man is a 12A certificate, the official definition of which as being suitable for people 12 years and older and that no children under 12 will be allowed in, unless accompanied by an adult. The problem the BBFC has long had is that since the introduction of the 12 certificate for Batman, the pressure to give films a sub-15 rating is huge and Iron Man is a perfect example of falling between two stools. Not gritty enough to be a 15, yet tougher in general themes and violence than a PG. By giving itself that ‘unless accompanied by an adult’ get out clause, the BBFC has effectively absolved some of its responsibility to the general public. The problem with that is that much of the general public, bless ‘em, are incapable of making that decision for themselves.
posted by Pendragon at 11:52 AM on August 17, 2008
Unintentionally funny video of the day: Crazy woman is afraid of rainbows.
posted by Astro Zombie at 11:52 AM on August 17, 2008 [7 favorites]
posted by Astro Zombie at 11:52 AM on August 17, 2008 [7 favorites]
Though his "I want to see kids films without kids present" idea is a bit daft, he's mostly complaining about the 12A certificate, and with good reason - it's a sop to the studios who want to maximise their potential ticket sales on films that contain scenes that aren't really suitable for, say, six year olds. (There's been a bit of a kerfuffle about the latest Batman film in the UK because of this. I've not seen it, but everyone I know who has thought it should've been an old-style 12 or a 15, and I don't exactly run with a Daily Mail reading 'think of the children' crowd.)
posted by jack_mo at 11:56 AM on August 17, 2008
posted by jack_mo at 11:56 AM on August 17, 2008
If I go to a kid-free movie, who will I blame when I squeal loudly in delight at Pixar cuteness, or audibly gasp "AARRHHH!" when a villain flies onto the screen?
posted by NikitaNikita at 11:56 AM on August 17, 2008
posted by NikitaNikita at 11:56 AM on August 17, 2008
I went to the latest showing of DK available in my area on opening weekend, and there were multiple children under three there, which cried frequently. It struck me as a little inappropriate, but hey, I'm not a parent! I'm way too repsonsible to reproduce in a world of six billion and climbing.
posted by mek at 11:56 AM on August 17, 2008
posted by mek at 11:56 AM on August 17, 2008
Astro Zombie, I will never be able to see a rainbow without thinking of the evil government's selfish quest for energy sources. Cheers!
posted by chudmonkey at 11:57 AM on August 17, 2008
posted by chudmonkey at 11:57 AM on August 17, 2008
> The best experience about watching Wall-E in the theatre was the muffled delighted squeaks from the kids in the audience with us.
Second that. A friend tipped me off to the strategy of attending Pixar movies during matinees specifically because of the energy in a roomful of kids enthralled by the flick.
This doesn't work so well with most movies. Even most kids movies. Even kids movies that do well at the box office. All modern kids movies are going to have their laugh lines, chase sequences and teary-eyed moments delivered on cue but few of them are engaging enough to keep children in their seats and paying attention.
posted by ardgedee at 11:59 AM on August 17, 2008
Second that. A friend tipped me off to the strategy of attending Pixar movies during matinees specifically because of the energy in a roomful of kids enthralled by the flick.
This doesn't work so well with most movies. Even most kids movies. Even kids movies that do well at the box office. All modern kids movies are going to have their laugh lines, chase sequences and teary-eyed moments delivered on cue but few of them are engaging enough to keep children in their seats and paying attention.
posted by ardgedee at 11:59 AM on August 17, 2008
Is this a new daily feature at Metafilter? I can't wait for tomorrow's post!
posted by roll truck roll at 12:03 PM on August 17, 2008
posted by roll truck roll at 12:03 PM on August 17, 2008
If you're not going to Pixar movies stoned out of your gourd you're doing it wrong.
posted by wfrgms at 12:04 PM on August 17, 2008
posted by wfrgms at 12:04 PM on August 17, 2008
Can they make stodgy-adult free theaters? When I saw the new Batman movie I was sitting in front of a kid in a batman costume, who would exclaim things like "Oh no, the Joker!! Look out!!" and "Whoa Batman beat that guy up coooool!"
I loved it. That's the way superhero movies were meant to be seen.
posted by Solon and Thanks at 12:06 PM on August 17, 2008
I loved it. That's the way superhero movies were meant to be seen.
posted by Solon and Thanks at 12:06 PM on August 17, 2008
Some people don't want to be around kids... It's a legitimate point; that's why there are specific clubs that have age limits above and beyond the minimum drinking age. Paying $X to go see a movie and wanting to be able to enjoy the experience, rather than fume about someone's aggravated child -- how is that a point worthy of derision? (Arguments as to how the viewpoint is expressed, aside.)
I'm an adult, and I like super-hero movies. I also don't care to spend time in the company of other people's children.
Get the DVD then and watch it at home. This isn't about going to a club, or even an R-rated movie. It's a comic book super-hero movie. Expect there to be children.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 12:06 PM on August 17, 2008
I'm an adult, and I like super-hero movies. I also don't care to spend time in the company of other people's children.
Get the DVD then and watch it at home. This isn't about going to a club, or even an R-rated movie. It's a comic book super-hero movie. Expect there to be children.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 12:06 PM on August 17, 2008
Can we talk more about this Crazy Rainbow Lady? She's wonderful.
Honestly, is she for real?
posted by gc at 12:09 PM on August 17, 2008 [1 favorite]
Honestly, is she for real?
posted by gc at 12:09 PM on August 17, 2008 [1 favorite]
The end of the video says dboots. Dboots' page now has no videos and a few snarky comments. This makes me think that the video was at least real enough that someone got embarassed and took it down.
posted by roll truck roll at 12:11 PM on August 17, 2008
posted by roll truck roll at 12:11 PM on August 17, 2008
can we have nerd-free screenings of movies? pony, PLEASE??
posted by pyramid termite at 12:12 PM on August 17, 2008
posted by pyramid termite at 12:12 PM on August 17, 2008
Get the DVD then and watch it at home. This isn't about going to a club, or even an R-rated movie. It's a comic book super-hero movie. Expect there to be children.
Right now that is my only option. I didn't say ban them from the theatre entirely, but adult-only screenings would be nice. I'd rather have that option than stew in my rage about some kid being, well, a kid. (I don't like them, doesn't mean I'm the psycho screamy guy who rages on parents.)
Maybe you should accept that there are positions besides "let them all in" and "ban them all".
posted by Dark Messiah at 12:14 PM on August 17, 2008
Right now that is my only option. I didn't say ban them from the theatre entirely, but adult-only screenings would be nice. I'd rather have that option than stew in my rage about some kid being, well, a kid. (I don't like them, doesn't mean I'm the psycho screamy guy who rages on parents.)
Maybe you should accept that there are positions besides "let them all in" and "ban them all".
posted by Dark Messiah at 12:14 PM on August 17, 2008
So what we need is a Superhero movie where the afraid of rainbows lady battles it out with the Rainbow Lady. And kids aren't allowed to watch.
Disclaimer: Mrs. Rainbow is a family friend, was my 6th grade Art teacher, and one of the coolest people I've ever met.
posted by billyfleetwood at 12:14 PM on August 17, 2008 [1 favorite]
Disclaimer: Mrs. Rainbow is a family friend, was my 6th grade Art teacher, and one of the coolest people I've ever met.
posted by billyfleetwood at 12:14 PM on August 17, 2008 [1 favorite]
Actually, the finest theater chain in America doesn't allow kids in evening showings of pretty much any PG-13 or R movie. Although they do have a baby showing, where all movies before 11am on Tuesdays are understood to be available to moms/dads w/ infants. Plus, where else can you see Labyrinth w/ live music and The Killing in the same week?
posted by nushustu at 12:14 PM on August 17, 2008
posted by nushustu at 12:14 PM on August 17, 2008
Mrs. Rainbow is a family friend, was my 6th grade Art teacher, and one of the coolest people I've ever met.
Art teachers and Science teachers didn't mingle much at your school, huh? At any rate, thank you for humanizing her. I may have found her video a little silly, but it's nice to be reminded that I should judge a book by its cover.
posted by chudmonkey at 12:19 PM on August 17, 2008
Art teachers and Science teachers didn't mingle much at your school, huh? At any rate, thank you for humanizing her. I may have found her video a little silly, but it's nice to be reminded that I should judge a book by its cover.
posted by chudmonkey at 12:19 PM on August 17, 2008
Oh, you mean the other rainbow lady is your friend. Whoops!
posted by chudmonkey at 12:20 PM on August 17, 2008
posted by chudmonkey at 12:20 PM on August 17, 2008
This makes me think that the video was at least real enough that someone got embarassed and took it down.
She must have noticed a youtube redesign and freaked out about the government flouridating her internet.
posted by blasdelf at 12:24 PM on August 17, 2008
She must have noticed a youtube redesign and freaked out about the government flouridating her internet.
posted by blasdelf at 12:24 PM on August 17, 2008
Today's superhero movies are aimed pretty squarely at adults. You need to:
1) be able to sit still for absurdly bloated 2.5 hour running times
2) be able to understand higher level concepts like:
- hack screenwriters cramming in bullshit half-assed Bush/9-11 symbolism in an attempt to appear "serious"
- Robert Downey jr. phoning in a performance for a role that is far far beneath him and he only took b/c he needed to prove he could get insured for a blockbuster and not fuck it up.
Also, children like things that are fun. With the exception of Heath Ledger's Joker scenes, today's superhero movies are utterly joyless exercises in separating geeks and former geeks from their $10.50.
posted by drjimmy11 at 12:25 PM on August 17, 2008 [1 favorite]
1) be able to sit still for absurdly bloated 2.5 hour running times
2) be able to understand higher level concepts like:
- hack screenwriters cramming in bullshit half-assed Bush/9-11 symbolism in an attempt to appear "serious"
- Robert Downey jr. phoning in a performance for a role that is far far beneath him and he only took b/c he needed to prove he could get insured for a blockbuster and not fuck it up.
Also, children like things that are fun. With the exception of Heath Ledger's Joker scenes, today's superhero movies are utterly joyless exercises in separating geeks and former geeks from their $10.50.
posted by drjimmy11 at 12:25 PM on August 17, 2008 [1 favorite]
This is an instance where one must follow the will of the crowd to be proper. It's like standing at a rock concert. If everyone is standing up but you, and you're bitching, you're the asshole. However, if everyone else is sitting and you're in front of them blocking the view, you're the asshole. Some theaters and crowds are for noise. My old Brooklyn theater was a madhouse. Now, I go to the ArcLight, where silence is golden. I'm more of an ArcLight person, but a lot of people would find it stuffy.
posted by Bookhouse at 12:27 PM on August 17, 2008
posted by Bookhouse at 12:27 PM on August 17, 2008
Maybe you should accept that there are positions besides "let them all in" and "ban them all".
Sure, sure. You know, I also dislike it when someone shrieks at surprising moments in a film. They should have Non-Shrieking showings. I'm not saying we should ban the shriekers, but those of us who prefer to watch a movie in a theatre in an environment perfectly suited to our sensibilities should be afforded that option.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 12:27 PM on August 17, 2008
Sure, sure. You know, I also dislike it when someone shrieks at surprising moments in a film. They should have Non-Shrieking showings. I'm not saying we should ban the shriekers, but those of us who prefer to watch a movie in a theatre in an environment perfectly suited to our sensibilities should be afforded that option.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 12:27 PM on August 17, 2008
Comic books = kids entertainment?
Not on Earth-Ron Thanagar!
posted by Ron Thanagar at 12:30 PM on August 17, 2008
Not on Earth-Ron Thanagar!
posted by Ron Thanagar at 12:30 PM on August 17, 2008
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