"There's also a Katamari level where everything is just slightly bigger than you, and a Mario level with a star just out of reach."
April 9, 2010 11:10 AM   Subscribe

Xkcd's hell, the flash game.
posted by Artw (83 comments total) 13 users marked this as a favorite
 
My high score was π lines.
posted by explosion at 11:13 AM on April 9, 2010 [4 favorites]


HAHA YES this is fucking glorious. 20 seconds in and I am already hysterically frustrated.
posted by elizardbits at 11:14 AM on April 9, 2010


I can't clear any lines, and the screen quickly fills up. How is this different from regular Tetris?
posted by uncleozzy at 11:16 AM on April 9, 2010 [18 favorites]


Going for the longest time? Hold down the left or right arrow key.
posted by jangie at 11:17 AM on April 9, 2010


Hell is other Tetrominoes.
posted by The Whelk at 11:17 AM on April 9, 2010 [2 favorites]


I tied the high score!
posted by Mister_A at 11:17 AM on April 9, 2010


The funny thing is, if it had normal Tetris physics, it'd probably be playable. Hell, apparently, is low gravity.
posted by daniel_charms at 11:19 AM on April 9, 2010 [12 favorites]


Boo. I managed to build a stable base and got 5 squares in a row.

Nothing happened. The game was not coded for lines to be removed.

Therefore, this is merely heck. Hell would be if the task was achievable, but always just out of reach. Sisyphus could roll the boulder up hill, after all. If this game was his punishment, there would just be a wall around the hill and the boulder would be chained to a post.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 11:19 AM on April 9, 2010 [25 favorites]


Levels Of Hell As Embodied By Video games - GO!
posted by The Whelk at 11:23 AM on April 9, 2010 [2 favorites]


Oh, also: if you have a hatred for yourself, here's another version of tetris. I remember the version I had a few years ago to be more unforgiving (that it would give you the worst piece all the time, rather than choosing between the three worst pieces)

http://blahg.res0l.net/2009/01/bastet-bastard-tetris/
posted by jangie at 11:24 AM on April 9, 2010 [5 favorites]


Nothing happened. The game was not coded for lines to be removed.

Pff.

That said, forwarded to my tetris-loving son.
posted by DU at 11:26 AM on April 9, 2010


The low gravity aspect is an added annoyance. Why not have normal Tetris gravity?
posted by yeti at 11:26 AM on April 9, 2010


It's possible to get a game over in error if you get a green "L" piece, move it as far to the right as possible, and rotate it very quickly. It'll move up and over the top.
posted by LSK at 11:26 AM on April 9, 2010


If you want this to be a real game, there's always Triptych.
posted by aspo at 11:27 AM on April 9, 2010 [2 favorites]


Levels Of Hell As Embodied By Video games - GO!

Go is not a video game.
posted by DU at 11:28 AM on April 9, 2010 [1 favorite]


who knew hell was so easy to avoid.
posted by edgeways at 11:29 AM on April 9, 2010 [2 favorites]


(sentences DU to the hell of willful misunderstanding )
posted by The Whelk at 11:31 AM on April 9, 2010


I was very amused when I carefully lined up a block on a stack for the first time and it knocked over the stack.
posted by smackfu at 11:34 AM on April 9, 2010


It's kinda fun to use the down arrow to speed up the pieces, then slam them into each other.

It doesn't actually help you progress in the game or anything, but the collision physics are interesting.
posted by Kadin2048 at 11:37 AM on April 9, 2010 [1 favorite]


The low gravity aspect is an added annoyance. Why not have normal Tetris gravity?

Ow, the pitchforks really hurt! Can't it just be really hot in here?
posted by Crane Shot at 11:38 AM on April 9, 2010 [12 favorites]


Oh god I can't stop giggling.
posted by restless_nomad at 11:39 AM on April 9, 2010


daniel_charms: "The funny thing is, if it had normal Tetris physics, it'd probably be playable. Hell, apparently, is low gravity."

"Normal" Tetris physics is played in 0g. The pieces do not accelerate downwards, instead they move at a fixed velocity.
posted by Plutor at 11:40 AM on April 9, 2010 [3 favorites]


Oh come on you guys. It wasn't that hard.
posted by ardgedee at 11:42 AM on April 9, 2010 [4 favorites]


Plutor: yeah, I realized this a bit after I had posted that comment. But at least in normal Tetris, when pieces hit the bottom they stay at the bottom, instead of floating around randomly. So it may not have gravity, but at least it has friction or something.
posted by daniel_charms at 11:48 AM on April 9, 2010


The other annoying thing is that you lose control of the blocks as soon as they touch another one, rather then when they 'settle'

An interesting variation on this would be to get the blocks packed as densely as possible.
posted by delmoi at 11:49 AM on April 9, 2010


>Therefore, this is merely heck. Hell would be if the task was achievable, but always just out of reach.

Welcome to hell.
posted by Mr. Anthropomorphism at 11:51 AM on April 9, 2010 [7 favorites]


I beat it!

The last guy is really hard.
posted by jquinby at 11:52 AM on April 9, 2010


You can get the blocks packed as densely as possible by never letting go of the down key. Eventually, they'll literally explode.
posted by aniola at 11:53 AM on April 9, 2010 [4 favorites]


Levels Of Hell As Embodied By Video games - GO!
  • A Legend of Zelda game with all Water Temples.
  • Resident Evil without ammunition.
  • Super Metroid without an ice beam.
  • A Mega Man game where all of the Robot Masters use the standard arm cannon for a special weapon.
  • God of War with no monsters to slaughter.
  • Final Fight featuring all Andores.
posted by Servo5678 at 11:55 AM on April 9, 2010 [2 favorites]


Levels Of Hell As Embodied By Video games - GO!

Shadow of the Beast (Genesis version) was ridiculously hard. So it's akin to that level of hell where you have to do physical chemistry problems while riding a unicycle. You are also locked in a cage with a rabid bear.
posted by Mister_A at 12:00 PM on April 9, 2010 [2 favorites]


How about super fast invisible Tetris? (It's merely really fast at the beginning. Then ridiculously fast starting at around 3:00. Then invisible starting at around 5:10.)
posted by kmz at 12:01 PM on April 9, 2010 [7 favorites]


OMG WTF
posted by zonem at 12:05 PM on April 9, 2010


That looks unpossible.
posted by Mister_A at 12:07 PM on April 9, 2010


Already? Wow.
posted by Pseudology at 12:11 PM on April 9, 2010


Levels Of Hell As Embodied By Video games - GO!

The hover bike level in Battletoads comes pretty close.
posted by burnmp3s at 12:11 PM on April 9, 2010 [10 favorites]


I was freakishly good at the hover bike level. It was my single notable talent when I was a kid.
posted by naju at 12:13 PM on April 9, 2010 [1 favorite]


Oh, and I later found out that I was also really good at sight-reading music. Not a coincidence.
posted by naju at 12:14 PM on April 9, 2010 [4 favorites]


Levels Of Hell As Embodied By Video games - GO!

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles -- NES
posted by milarepa at 12:19 PM on April 9, 2010 [7 favorites]


Hell would be if the task was achievable, but always just out of reach.

Well actually, that is just normal Tetris, isn't it? The purest form of the game has no "end." The "acheivement" is that fleeting accomplishment that is snatched away. You are left only with your mistakes, doing your best to dodge or reclaim the jagged remainders of the pieces you couldn't account for as the barrage grows ever more intense, until you are inevitably swallowed by faliure. Your only hope is to fail a little further down the line than last time.

I've always been fascinated by the psychology of tetris, and have often thought it could be a great way to judge personality (perhaps this has been done, or at least said better than I can put it).

You have the pragmatist, who tries to use every piece as efficiently as possible, forgoing big multi-line scores in the hope that they can instead survive long enough and keep things neat to complete more predictable single-lines.

You have optimist, who builds up everything but the gap for that one, elusive skinny piece that will bring the big, eponymous 4-line score... until that time that it doesn't come and they are left panicking to fill the void with whatever they can.

And then there is the haphazardist, who flies by the seat of his pants, submitting to the fact that the "opponent" may fall by his own means: randomness.

Of course, all these techniques are but illusions of control, and they all break down eventually. When the screen finally fills, you are left with a choice: accept that the effectiveness of your foolproof system can be quantified by the number flashing on the screen, or push the button and start again. This time, you will make your choices even more (or less) deliberately. This time you will derive a sense of accomplishment from your actions, will escape the inherently unbeatable, demoralizing mechanics of the game. You are in control.

Just one more round....

Man. What a great game.
posted by Mr. Anthropomorphism at 12:20 PM on April 9, 2010 [22 favorites]


Levels Of Hell As Embodied By Video games - GO!

Final Fantasy 13. god that game gets boring.

on the joke level,
how about Portal WITH a cake.
posted by ShawnString at 12:21 PM on April 9, 2010


Levels Of Hell As Embodied By Video games - GO!

Contra - With the Konami code disabled.
posted by kmz at 12:22 PM on April 9, 2010


I am not a game person. At all. Yet this amused me greatly. Well done.
posted by cccorlew at 12:24 PM on April 9, 2010


I'm on an iPad, so Flash apps would give me nothing but FailLego. Hell has several floors, just like Dante said it would.
posted by runningdogofcapitalism at 12:42 PM on April 9, 2010


Levels Of Hell As Embodied By Video games - GO!

Daikatana.
A version of Dwarf Fortress that you can never figure out how to play.
Farmville that you cannot turn off and all your friends are playing.
posted by daniel_charms at 12:44 PM on April 9, 2010


Levels of Hell As Embodied by Video Games – GO!

-Shadow of the Colossus with hairless colossi.
-Mirror’s Edge: Faith is colorblind.
-Bioshock – All you hear over the communicator is Atlas Shrugged read to you in a robot voice.
posted by edbles at 12:48 PM on April 9, 2010 [7 favorites]


If you want this to be a real game, there's always Triptych.

Seconded. I fucking love Triptych.
posted by The Devil Tesla at 12:50 PM on April 9, 2010


Anyone have a good walkthrough? There isn't one on GameFAQs yet.
posted by eyeballkid at 12:54 PM on April 9, 2010


aniola:You can get the blocks packed as densely as possible by never letting go of the down key. Eventually, they'll literally explode.

Wow, you weren't joking either.

If you keep the down=key pressed down, the end-of-game detector doesn't kick in, because each new piece moves down before the collision detection stops it, and then all the pieces on screen start to vibrate faster and faster as the physics code gets overloaded. Its pretty cool.
posted by memebake at 1:03 PM on April 9, 2010 [1 favorite]


Honestly, HD tetris seems even more hellish. (Alternatively, First Person Tetris exists only to make you sick)
posted by schmod at 1:04 PM on April 9, 2010 [1 favorite]


Another take on tetris hell via reddit.
posted by delmoi at 1:14 PM on April 9, 2010 [1 favorite]


You can get the blocks packed as densely as possible by never letting go of the down key. Eventually, they'll literally explode.

Hmm, they started vibrating, but eventually the End of game thing shows up, haven't gotten an explosion (I've tried it twice)
posted by delmoi at 1:20 PM on April 9, 2010


Levels of Hell As Embodied by Video Games – GO!

Doom with just the chainsaw. Hell for all those demons that is :)
posted by litleozy at 1:31 PM on April 9, 2010


> Levels Of Hell As Embodied By Video games - GO!

Pong with paddles that chip away every time the ball hits them.
Adventure without a sword.
Zork without an N key.
GT on a unicycle.
ET the game, superglued into the Atari console.
posted by ardgedee at 1:44 PM on April 9, 2010 [2 favorites]


You can get the blocks packed as densely as possible by never letting go of the down key. Eventually, they'll literally explode.

Hmm, they started vibrating, but eventually the End of game thing shows up, haven't gotten an explosion (I've tried it twice)


No explosion, but a few did start falling out the right side and into the Next Shape box, which was a surprising turn of events!
posted by platinum at 1:47 PM on April 9, 2010


Maniac Mansion where every task can be completed by a combination of Dave and two other kids, but no such combination can complete every task.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 2:33 PM on April 9, 2010 [3 favorites]


> I'm on an iPad, so ....
posted by runningdogofcapitalism at 8:42 PM on April 9 [+] [!]


Epony.. oh forgeddit
posted by fcummins at 2:40 PM on April 9, 2010


When I saw that comic, I knew without a doubt that someone would make a real version of it. I'm surprised it took so long.

Is there a webpage listing XKCD ideas that have been created in real life?
posted by straight at 3:08 PM on April 9, 2010 [1 favorite]


I'm reminded of Tetroid 2012 (gameplay videos here), which is awesome, because not only is that an excuse to link to something on Pouet (makes me happier than it should), but because it also by proxy reminded me of Tetripz, which reminded me to call my friend Dave, whom I haven't spoken to in ages.

Cheers MetaFilter! :~D
posted by TheTorns at 3:16 PM on April 9, 2010 [1 favorite]


> Levels Of Hell As Embodied By Video games - GO!

The Barrens in WoW
any Kings Quest game
the last untouchable pegs in Peggle
posted by Wuggie Norple at 3:43 PM on April 9, 2010


I've found a way to make it a playable and interesting game: see how few blocks you can end the game in.

My best (lowest) so far is 8.
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 3:59 PM on April 9, 2010 [1 favorite]


Apparently I'm in an extra special circle of Hell where nothing happens when I press the space key.
posted by Horace Rumpole at 4:00 PM on April 9, 2010 [1 favorite]


In spite of the physics and the uneven boundaries, I started wondering if it was possible to...

No.
posted by Anything at 4:41 PM on April 9, 2010


Horace, try clicking the game area before pressing space.
posted by Anything at 4:43 PM on April 9, 2010


Levels Of Hell As Embodied By Video games - GO!

How about Frogger with the homes imperceptably thinner than the frog itself?
posted by ikahime at 4:48 PM on April 9, 2010 [3 favorites]


I've found a way to make it a playable and interesting game: see how few blocks you can end the game in.

My best (lowest) so far is 8.
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 3:59 PM on April 9 [+] [!]


I got 6!
posted by Anything at 4:54 PM on April 9, 2010


(including the new piece)
posted by Anything at 4:55 PM on April 9, 2010


5!
posted by Anything at 4:58 PM on April 9, 2010


4!

(I have a feeling that's as low as I can get)
posted by Anything at 5:08 PM on April 9, 2010 [1 favorite]


(Don't believe me? Check my profile image.)
posted by Anything at 5:20 PM on April 9, 2010 [1 favorite]




Boo. I managed to build a stable base and got 5 squares in a row.

Pix or it didn't happen.
posted by dgaicun at 6:45 PM on April 9, 2010


Awww.
posted by ageispolis at 6:51 PM on April 9, 2010


Actually, you can finish it with just one (1) brick: an L brick can be pushed against the wall in a way that actually sends it back upwards, and with a couple of repetitions back over the top edge, which ends the game.
posted by Anything at 7:50 PM on April 9, 2010


Hell would be if the task was achievable, but always just out of reach.

Well actually, that is just normal Tetris, isn't it?


You never beat my Mom's high score. There was victory in Tetris then, my friend! We'd get pizza and take out because somebody just had to reclaim her title. Somebody who could not make a SPAM casserole if her life depended on it, mind you.

To me, the quickening of Tchaikovsky tastes like egg rolls now.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 8:16 PM on April 9, 2010 [1 favorite]


Contra - With the Konami code disabled.

Pansy.
posted by Pope Guilty at 11:11 PM on April 9, 2010


The game might be rigged, but I'm awarding brownie points for the best screen capture.
posted by dgaicun at 12:29 AM on April 10, 2010


HEY GUYS:

Please, there was a cool game on here maybe 6 months or a year ago. You had to stack, to get "this high". Then the screen zooms out and you have to stack an order of magnitude higher.

Remember that game? Please link it?
posted by Meatbomb at 1:03 AM on April 10, 2010


Please, there was a cool game on here maybe 6 months or a year ago. You had to stack, to get "this high". Then the screen zooms out and you have to stack an order of magnitude higher.

Remember that game? Please link it?


99 bricks and its sequel?
posted by Phssthpok at 2:20 AM on April 10, 2010


No, it wasn't that one... It is with bricks falling like rain, and you have to glom them onto your pad at the bottom... the structure you build gets bigger and bigger, and the bricks fall faster and faster.
posted by Meatbomb at 2:36 AM on April 10, 2010


Contra - With the Konami code disabled.

Pansy.


QFT
posted by King Bee at 6:10 AM on April 10, 2010


Meatbomb, was it Pixel Pile?

I'm curious as heck about this game, and loaded up Google Ultra to try and find it.

Pixel Pile was the closest I could find, but it seems to be an iPhone/Touch game.
posted by crushthemall at 2:04 PM on April 13, 2010


I totally lied:

Pixel GROWER?
posted by crushthemall at 2:08 PM on April 13, 2010 [1 favorite]


Oh, thank you so much crushthemall, that's the one!!!
posted by Meatbomb at 4:05 PM on April 13, 2010


« Older the countries of old men drift like the waters   |   Butch Anthony and The Alabama Museum of Wonder. Newer »


This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments