Monobrow: the new mullet.

December 27, 2003 9:43 AM

Monobrow.
posted by monju_bosatsu (41 comments total)

Can't they just do a little "touch up" when they're shaving? Is it that hard?
posted by tommasz at 10:34 AM on December 27, 2003

I bet in some cultures, a monobrow is a sign of virility, courage, sex appeal, etc.

Yeah.
posted by davidmsc at 10:43 AM on December 27, 2003

Jason Molina, from songs:ohia. do something about your freaking eyebrow, you alt-country indie rocker!
posted by mcsweetie at 10:59 AM on December 27, 2003

There is not enough coffee in California to make me awake enough to look at that site past the front page!
posted by billsaysthis at 11:17 AM on December 27, 2003

Those of us who have them prefer "unibrow", thank you very much.

And davidmsc, my ex-boss (an Iranian) said that it was called a "Persian eyebrow" and was very desirable, even more so for women than for men. Of course, he would wear a Speedo to the company waterski parties and it looked like he was smuggling Brillo pads in there, but that's beside the point.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 11:24 AM on December 27, 2003

I think week 29 is the Patron Saint of the unibrow, REM's former drummer Bill Berry. I'll admit it, I pluck.
posted by machaus at 11:25 AM on December 27, 2003

Something not entirely on topic but, assuming there is internet "grammar", which is the more correct linking style:

This.

Or...

This.

The second one looks more pleasing to me.
posted by Mwongozi at 11:59 AM on December 27, 2003

...Company waterski parties?
posted by kevspace at 12:00 PM on December 27, 2003

WWKD, what would Kyan do?
posted by MrBaliHai at 12:31 PM on December 27, 2003

You should know darn well, MrB: Kyan has done monobrow removal (painfully and usually comically) on 50% of all 'Straight Guys' on the show...
posted by wendell at 12:45 PM on December 27, 2003

Can't they just do a little "touch up" when they're shaving? Is it that hard?
There's an epidemic of guys walking around with a razor's width space between their eyebrows--it looks weird and abrupt (and not much better than an unibrow)--try tweezers, please!
posted by amberglow at 1:15 PM on December 27, 2003

"Company waterski parties?"

Yeah, that was the only perk of that shitty job. Although the Speedo nearly ruined that, too.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 1:29 PM on December 27, 2003

Personally, I welcome our new Super Greg overlords.
posted by fatbobsmith at 2:09 PM on December 27, 2003

Ain't no way my son would do tweezers. He'd think it was too "effeminate." Not to mention the ouch factor. Obviously none of you guys has plucked an eyebrow hair before.
posted by konolia at 2:35 PM on December 27, 2003

a) I have one
b) No point shaving it when you just end up with a strange grey spot
c) I'm a guy, therefore I don't care
d) It matches my prominent widow's peak (genetic, not receeding), which also looks stupid when shaved.
e) Last but not least, when you already have 25% grey hair at 25 you give up caring. There's no point anymore to looking good.

HTH. tommasz :-)
posted by shepd at 2:37 PM on December 27, 2003

konolia: Real men use tweezers. Plucking lasts much longer too (altho i've been thinking of going for threading)
posted by amberglow at 2:44 PM on December 27, 2003

Yes, unibrow is much more appropriate. As shepd said, I'm a guy, and I don't care, and it doesn't seem to impede my ability to meet women (my personality is much more of an impediment, and it's not like I can get uglier). I do trim my nose hair, for some reason that seems much grosser to other people. Besides, I'm just a blue collar grunt, who cares what my eyebrow looks like?
posted by Eekacat at 2:52 PM on December 27, 2003

There's a joke here set to the tune of the monorail song from The Simpsons, but damned if I can find it.
posted by keswick at 2:52 PM on December 27, 2003

Or is that "eyesbrow"?
posted by Eekacat at 2:52 PM on December 27, 2003

o sweet jeezus
'effeminate' my ass.
and the 'ouch' factor? it does NOT hurt that bad .... what a sissy.

if you have a unibrow or know someone who does, (even if you don't care about your looks anymore) do the WORLD a favour: get a $3 pair of tweezers and pluck it... no big deal. shaving will almost make it look worse. you'll still be 'man' enough to watch football and you won't have all those people in the elevator/onthetrain/inthemeeting staring at it and thinking 'is he too cheap for tweezers or does he just not own a mirror?' anymore. think of all the car accidents and nightmares you'll prevent.



nose hairs too, while you're at it.
posted by 11235813 at 3:05 PM on December 27, 2003

Look, I use tweezers and it hurts. Enough that usually my eyebrow hairs grow where they jolly well please.

I do pluck the occasional chin hair, though.
posted by konolia at 3:13 PM on December 27, 2003

what 1123456 said : >
posted by amberglow at 3:17 PM on December 27, 2003

(i apologize if i came off a little nasty in that post .... this topic hit a nerve :) )
posted by 11235813 at 3:23 PM on December 27, 2003

A little bit of wax goes a long, long way.
posted by Dreama at 3:49 PM on December 27, 2003

Hey there 21, here's an answer I always love:

IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT DON'T LOOK AT IT. :-)
posted by shepd at 3:57 PM on December 27, 2003

Dreama, my best friend's description of her eyebrow waxing was bloodcurdling. *shudder*
posted by konolia at 4:11 PM on December 27, 2003

All the women I know say that they cry from the pain of waxing, so I'll pass.
posted by amberglow at 4:18 PM on December 27, 2003

Can you wax nosehair?
posted by inpHilltr8r at 4:39 PM on December 27, 2003

All the women I know say they cry from the pain of childbirth, but still it must be done.

In all seriousness? Eyebrow waxing is not this excruciating experience that everyone makes it out to be. Is it as fun as oral sex? No, but I'll take one second of the ripping (literally... one second. That's how long it takes to remove the strip) over the hundred tiny one-after-the-other stings of tweezing.

The alternative is out-of-control eyebrows, which men have the luxury of joking about but women have to actually control lest they look "masculine."
posted by pineapple at 4:40 PM on December 27, 2003

but can you do it yourself without messing up, pineapple?

and no, inphilltr8r--trimming is it, i think.
posted by amberglow at 4:47 PM on December 27, 2003

Yesss. Frida Kahlo rules. (Monobrow owner and liker).
posted by raygirvan at 5:15 PM on December 27, 2003

I don't mind monobrows as much as I do people whose brows grow so long you could braid 'em.
posted by konolia at 8:06 PM on December 27, 2003

I had my stocking stuffed with one of these. Highly recommended. Go from Far Side cartoon to fruity metrosexual in 30 seconds flat.
posted by dong_resin at 10:24 PM on December 27, 2003

When my waning adolescence stopped producing zits a'plenty, I took up fixing my unibrow via tweezers as a substitute preening neurosis. Pulling out hairs on the *outside* of the brow is much more painful than the middle, but it's still about as painful as scratching your ass.

Now, plucking nose hairs...that'll induce tears, oh yes.
posted by notsnot at 11:33 PM on December 27, 2003

Dunno why, but I've always liked good eyebrows on women - nice natural full ones, not l'il ol' picked-over ones.
posted by alumshubby at 11:49 PM on December 27, 2003

alumshubby - Good eyebrows on women, and moustaches, indicate healthy levels of background testosterone (at levels far lower than in men though) which are necessary for the healthy female sex drive. Studies have shown.......

Anyway, it's the hair growing out of my nose and ears that bugs me. If I didn't trim the nose hair quite often, I'd be able to braid it.
posted by troutfishing at 4:03 AM on December 28, 2003

I didn't realize so many people were BALD in the center of their eyebrow. Poor disabled souls.
posted by HTuttle at 4:57 AM on December 28, 2003

but can you do it yourself without messing up, pineapple?


Oh, hell no. That's why it's worth it to me to pay a professional $10 every six weeks. Otherwise I'd be all uneven and raggedy (and possibly with permanent wax burns).
posted by pineapple at 9:12 AM on December 28, 2003

HTuttle - You can help them out through a tax deductible contribution to RODBS (Remediation of Dual-Browism Society), which offers free cosmetic reconstruction for the dual-brow impaired
posted by troutfishing at 9:16 AM on December 28, 2003

I guess I'm not surprised that some of you are so conformist, surpassing the joke to make real judgements about a person based on something so trivial as hair. I'm just still surprised when the weasels stand up and wave, "Here I am, I'm a weasel!"
posted by roboto at 3:51 PM on December 28, 2003

roboto - why are you challenging my right to mock my own advancing monobrow - so relentlessly encroaching, so diligently kept at bay through an endless succession of fresh razors?

Are you sensitive about your own?

It shouldn't be a point of shame - I blame society.
posted by troutfishing at 8:12 PM on December 28, 2003