The Incredibly Easy Pee-Zee

November 29, 2004 6:48 PM

I will definitely get one of these . . . to use at various outdoor summer events, so I don't have to dehydrate myself for fear of using those awful porta-potties.
posted by livingsanctuary (36 comments total)

Pepsi Yellow?

(Just kidding.)
posted by Faint of Butt at 6:56 PM on November 29, 2004

Just promise me you don't own the URL and all will be well.
posted by adamgreenfield at 7:17 PM on November 29, 2004

Blue-Green. Pepsi is storied.
posted by Cryptical Envelopment at 7:20 PM on November 29, 2004

[sigh] bladder capacity remains the same
posted by HyperBlue at 7:32 PM on November 29, 2004

Am I the only one who sees something funny in that it's a Tripod site?
posted by wendell at 7:36 PM on November 29, 2004

Is it just me or is this really sorta... gross? I'm a lapsed farm kid and all -- I've wet down my share of fence posts and haybales -- but this... an appartus for discreet public urination?
posted by nathan_teske at 7:37 PM on November 29, 2004

I'm just surprised they actually have photos of it being used on the front page of the site.
posted by Hildago at 7:43 PM on November 29, 2004

Don't eat the yellow snow.
posted by blucevalo at 7:48 PM on November 29, 2004

I'm with nathan_teske. Why do you think they invented trees? They're made to pee on!
posted by BradNelson at 7:51 PM on November 29, 2004

Nathan: It's not for being discreet, it's for women to be able to pee standing up.
posted by Bugbread at 7:52 PM on November 29, 2004 [1 favorite]

I promise that I definitely do not own the URL!
posted by livingsanctuary at 8:00 PM on November 29, 2004

omg. is that chick in the blue t-shirt drinking from one?
posted by danOstuporStar at 8:04 PM on November 29, 2004

"Rinse when possible."

No, those words don't make me shudder. Not at all.

"purse friendly" on the other hand.....
posted by helcat at 8:05 PM on November 29, 2004

Pros use the Stadium Pal.
posted by Armitage Shanks at 8:07 PM on November 29, 2004

Oh.... it's for women. Ok, that makes much more sense --- I thought it was so guys could avoid public indecency charges or something (read first, then post)
posted by nathan_teske at 8:09 PM on November 29, 2004

Well, I suppose if I were a woman who enjoyed hiking this device would be terribly handy.
posted by Colloquial Collision at 8:19 PM on November 29, 2004

Here are a couple of pics of the model that Pee Funnel Camp was making at Burning Man this year. Scroll to the bottom and look for the clear cups with tubes coming out. LINK NSFW NAKED WOMEN *AND* MEN

It's basically a flexible Solo drinking cup, about beer-cup size, with a bit of vinyl tubing punched through the bottom. The seam is sealed with a little silicone gel.

Since the tub pokes up about half an inch, not all the pee flows out the tube. So the directions that come with the funnel say to be sure to turn it over and shake it out.

Now. I got into a long debate with a girl who said "What's the point of having the funnel tube at all if I have to turn it over and pour out that last inch of pee? Why not just use a regular cup if I have to turn it over and empty it?"

To which I immediately replied "Except you might have to do that a few times in any one pee." She said she never, ever peed more than would fit in a 12oz. plastic cup. I was very surprised, as I nearly always do.

We then walked around surveying people, asking if they generally peed more or less than 12oz. at a go.

And that's the wonder of Burning Man. You finally have time to figure out the really important stuff that you somehow just never get around to in your normal life.
posted by scarabic at 8:27 PM on November 29, 2004

I would be very surprised if she peed less than 12oz. I never realized how much pee was in a standard tinkle until I had to pee into a can while traveling. It's a lot of pee.
posted by Bugbread at 8:35 PM on November 29, 2004 [1 favorite]

You did not just say "tinkle."
posted by adamgreenfield at 8:58 PM on November 29, 2004

This is very similar to the Magic Cone. Only the Magic Cone is disposable.
posted by jefbla at 9:02 PM on November 29, 2004

I had a friend once, who after a hard night's drinking at the 6 bar, 2000k (including students) population town *almost* made it with a pee in the snow from the bar to the dorms (I'd estimate a half klick).

Myself, in a moving vehicle, had have to (is that proper grammar?) cut-off, and switch 1L bottles (the second one was ~half full).

I don't think this would help in a road trip, but it might keep the mess down. How well does cat litter do with human waste?
posted by PurplePorpoise at 9:15 PM on November 29, 2004

It looks interesting, but not owning vulva, I don't know how practical it is. Sadly, they don't link to instructions for how to dig a proper latrine. Not that I'd expect 100% of outdoor urinators to carry a shovel.
posted by bugmuncher at 9:30 PM on November 29, 2004

Disturbing quote #3, from Stadium Pal:

"I am the original Stadium Gal. I took the first step for all us women, and I'm glad I did it. I used to make fun of the Stadium Pal until the idea of the Gal came up, and I wanted to be the first. It works great and no one could tell I had it on. I'm proud to be a Stadium Gal. My husband is proud to be a Pal, but he seems to think that he is still at the game even after we get home. Men are lazy."

On the site, this paeon was in all caps, completing the shudder Trifecta of "I have a bumper sticker advertising that I carry a pouch of piss on my leg which I think makes me the Elizabeth Cady Stanton of sports attendees/my husband no longer bothers to stand to urinate/I punctuate my notice of this as though I were an 18th century woman of letters describing A Device of Exceeding Wit and Cleverness."

And yes, adamgreenfield, I just said paeon.
posted by melissa may at 9:36 PM on November 29, 2004

Sing to "If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands!":

Got a skeeter on your pee-zee?
     Wack it off!
Got a skeeter on your pee-zee?
     Wack it off!
Got a dozen on your cousin,
I can hear the bastards buzzin'
Got a skeeter on your pee-zee?
     Wack it off!*

Naw, it's just not the same, ladies!
posted by Doohickie at 9:38 PM on November 29, 2004

*ahem* though not female, i have a few friends and family members who have used variants of this device - they all claim it makes a mess when used, to the point of being worthless. perhaps everyone i know whose tried it is just clumsy - but i recommend caution.

maybe get one with a money-back guarantee :)
posted by louigi at 9:49 PM on November 29, 2004

"My name is Steven and I am a driver for United Parcel Service in Michigan. [...] Now that I have my stadium pal there is no more delay or inconvenience for constantly stopping to use the bathroom. It was a little unusual getting used to, but now I find myself urinating right during delivering packages or conversating with people. What people don't know won't bother them!!!!!!!"

"What can Brown do for you?"
posted by Armitage Shanks at 9:53 PM on November 29, 2004

Stem cells rebuild bladder control
posted by homunculus at 10:03 PM on November 29, 2004

I think I'm going to get a Stadium Pal for the next time I go see a 2 hour+ film and stupidly get one of those giant sodas.
posted by sixdifferentways at 10:53 PM on November 29, 2004

If it's made in Canada, how come it isn't called the Pee-Zed?

I'll be here all week, tip the waitress, etc.
posted by jokeefe at 11:22 PM on November 29, 2004

I find many of you to be extremely disturbed. Then again, it's what I've always enjoyed about reading MeFi.
posted by mstefan at 12:10 AM on November 30, 2004

Disturbing Quote #4: And who hasn't envied men their special Winter recreation? With Whizzy, you'll be able to paint with the boys!

Etc Etc
posted by lagavulin at 12:11 AM on November 30, 2004

Here's a simple rule of life:

If you can't deal with going to the toilet at your designated event then you really shouldn't be there. Stay home.

I need to volunteer as a Black Rock Ranger next year. If I caught any weenies bleating about their toilet traumas they'd be dropped off with the taxidermist in Gerlach toot sweet...
posted by i_cola at 12:51 AM on November 30, 2004

TINKLE
posted by Bugbread at 6:33 AM on November 30, 2004 [1 favorite]

That was funny, melissa may.
posted by deafmute at 6:54 AM on November 30, 2004

"I have a bumper sticker advertising that I carry a pouch of piss on my leg which I think makes me the Elizabeth Cady Stanton of sports attendees

Why that would make her an American Hero!
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 7:10 AM on November 30, 2004

Disturbing FAQ #1: From Stadium Gal
Q: Can I use the Stadium Gal while menstruating?
A: Not Recommended.

A Real Audio account of David Sedaris' less-than-pleasant experience with the Stadium Pal is at the This American Life site (5/31/02 show).
posted by bibliowench at 7:38 AM on November 30, 2004