Naked Portafilters (SFW)

March 9, 2005 12:17 PM

Naked portafilter photos!!1! (SFW) Naked is hot (about 200 degrees F)
posted by turbodog (33 comments total)

My favorite.
posted by turbodog at 12:17 PM on March 9, 2005

You were so totally googling "Naked Portman" when you found this, huh?

Damn that's some sexy foam, though. I hereby would like to commission an engineer to engineer me a portable, self-powered doohickey that'll spray foamy espresso spoor directly into my mouth whenever I desire it. A post-foaming cooling circuit may be required, however.
posted by loquacious at 12:27 PM on March 9, 2005

But is it a God Shot?
posted by debralee at 12:32 PM on March 9, 2005

Busted!

Actually the photographer is a frequent photo poster to CoffeeGeek.
posted by turbodog at 12:32 PM on March 9, 2005

Just when you thought the geekiest people in the world were beer nerds, along comes an even more whacked subgroup, the coffee freaks. It's coffee, it's not that fascinating.

(on edit) CoffeeGeek - Nice
posted by Keith Talent at 12:33 PM on March 9, 2005

looks like poo.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 12:39 PM on March 9, 2005

Actually, it's pretty fascinating. It's not cawfee, it's espresso, and there's definitely an art to making a quality shot. Something you won't find at your corner Starbucks. People mod their machines for performance searching for that perfect shot of espresso. (I'll be adding temperature control to my own Rancilio Silvia).

The geekiest people in the world are still Trekkies (in all their permutations).
posted by Eekacat at 12:46 PM on March 9, 2005

No, Trekkies while incredibly geeky to be sure, have developed a complex and nuanced little world to live in (which fortunely keeps them out of mine). Coffee geeks on the other hand have such a narrow set of criteria and so few variables in the quest for perfection as to be the most geeky of all the dorks. See the thing is great coffee isn't *that* much better than regular coffee, and the mesure of geekdom is how much effort are you willing to go to for tiny virtually imperceptable improvements of performance.
posted by Keith Talent at 1:01 PM on March 9, 2005

mmmmmm la crema
posted by laurenbove at 1:05 PM on March 9, 2005

Obviously, you haven't met the home theater geeks.

Not only will we go to extraordinary efforts for virtually imperceptible improvements, but we will spend vast sums to do it. Then claim that it's all absolutely necessary.

But then there are wine geeks. But they call themselves "connoisseurs". Or the cigar aficionados.
posted by cptnrandy at 1:07 PM on March 9, 2005

good post, thanks: interesting AskMeFi espresso-related thread here
posted by matteo at 1:11 PM on March 9, 2005

See the thing is great coffee isn't *that* much better than regular coffee, and the mesure of geekdom is how much effort are you willing to go to for tiny virtually imperceptable improvements of performance.

*pats Keith Talent on the head patronizingly*
posted by turbodog at 1:50 PM on March 9, 2005

It's coffee, it's not that fascinating.

Stone him!!! ;)

I was touching myself as I looked at those pictures. Is that wrong?

I use my coffee maker as a poor man's espresso machine. Basically, I double-load the basket with french roast and put the cup under to get the "crack" part of the coffee. Cut it with some half n' half and I'm flying high til' noon.
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 2:15 PM on March 9, 2005

That is some pretty beautiful looking coffee. Mmmmm.
posted by jb at 2:43 PM on March 9, 2005

Has anyone personally had a super-flavored "god shot"? (Which is defined as being the most potent, flavorful coffee) Personally I don't think I've seen it yet.
posted by uni verse at 2:47 PM on March 9, 2005

Actually, if espresso geeks were as geeky as Trekkies, they'd go to conventions dressed as their favorite bean and translate the bible into the non-existent language "caffiene".
posted by Eekacat at 2:51 PM on March 9, 2005

I poked my head above the clouds when I went from buying pre-ground coffee to buying whole beans. What I then discovered to be the most important element to making fulfilling coffee is to do the exact same thing every time.

With that in mind, I have now come to love Starbucks and "the machine". It's pretty good, every time. I stopped going to Peet's because of the variability.

And home theatre people are WAY geekier than trekkies. They basically strive to sit alone in a room with their eyes closed.
posted by hammurderer at 3:19 PM on March 9, 2005

Funny, in my opinion, the best coffee I've ever had is Turkish Coffee, made by one of my friends, who was taught by his Armenian grandmother. There's an article about it on everything2 written by him here: http://www.everything2.com/index.pl?node_id=1548436

My standard order at any coffee shop that doesn't have Turkish is a double short-pull (aka ristretto), which I then proceed to put much brown sugar in. As is mentioned in that article I linked to, it's very much like Turkish coffee.

And Turkish coffee is my definition of a God Shot. Espresso's just a cheap substitute.
posted by Calast at 3:23 PM on March 9, 2005

Some people really know how to grind.
Thanks, Calast.
posted by uni verse at 3:51 PM on March 9, 2005

Some people really don't know how to taste good coffee. "Just coffee." Pshaw.

Anyone got links to espresso machine hacking? I'd love to do some tune-ups on mine.
posted by five fresh fish at 4:38 PM on March 9, 2005

Not off hand, which one you got? I find double quantity and a longer run on the *BUCK$ personal barista helps me stay awake for those zen meditations.
posted by uni verse at 4:57 PM on March 9, 2005

And as a sacrilegious segue, how about this homemade espresso machine (courtesy Engadget)?
posted by bachelor#3 at 6:41 PM on March 9, 2005

Who you talking to? If me, I've got a Starbucks Barista (rebadged... Gaggia? Solis? Something like that). I've never purchased Starbucks coffee, though; I get a locally-roasted fair trade organic coffee ('cause I want coffee farmers to stay alive).
posted by five fresh fish at 6:50 PM on March 9, 2005

Er... damn. Universe, who are you talking to? ('cause now it looks like I'm replying to bachelor3)...
posted by five fresh fish at 6:51 PM on March 9, 2005

I think I may have had a one of these so-called God shots. Once. Out of thousands of shots. I was hanging out at one of dozens of shops in my life over the last dozen or so years. We were bored, doing espresso-shot drinking games and playing day-old bran-muffin hackysack and similar assgrabbery. If you've ever worked at or lived at a local non-corporate shop, you know what I'm talking about.

I told whoever it was that was working - I think it was Chuck, but it might have been Ryan, or Scott or Bryan or any other of a vast number of these sorts of theater major, literature, visual arts or "whatever, man" dropouts that one finds hip deep in coffee grounds trying to avoid the man just a little - I told him that I wanted something special.

We'd done redeyes and pinballs, depth charges and weird, gelatinously quivering foamy things that no one wanted to drink. Someone even tried ubercoffee - coffee or dr. pepper brewed through even more coffee. That was truly disgusting shit. Stupid, stupid kid's stuff. Ok, some of it was fun, but still.

But I want something different. So homeboy winks, heads back to the office and comes back out with an unopened 4 or 6 oz vac bag of beans. Grinds them carefully. Takes his time tamping a double shot, but doesn't fuss over it or overdo it. Gives it a good pull. Not a single, but obviously not a double.

By the time it got to my hands it was still half crema. The smell was just totally overwhelmingly delicious, like billions of chocolately-nutty-umami kamakazi dive-bombing flavor packets assulting every nook and cranny of my nose. I remember thinking "Woah, this must be what coffee smells like to a dog." Sensations bordering on synaesthesia from intensity. The first sip knocked me more or less speechless. He asked how I liked it, and all I could do was nod and grunt in appreciation, and apparently that was the effect he was hoping for. It took me like half an hour to an hour to sip that. I remember it was sunny but a little brisk, and I just closed my eyes and really didn't think it got much better that, at all.

Only, espresso really hasn't ever been the same for me since. I really can't go into Starbucks or Coffee Bean and order a shot for enjoyment and taste.
posted by loquacious at 6:58 PM on March 9, 2005

Yuck! Burnt water! How anyone can drick that vile stuff is beyond Berek!
posted by berek at 7:37 PM on March 9, 2005

/me lights berek on fire so he can experience first-hand the pleasures of smoking.
posted by loquacious at 7:39 PM on March 9, 2005

The geekiest people in the world are still Trekkies

For all of their pageantry, the Trekkies are just fans, imo.

The truly obsessed craft their own. I make my own ultra-fi gear with vacuum tubes. I welded my own bicycles. These folks are clearly just as afflicted. I had no idea people were modding their Rancilios...

If you're still buying your geekery in a box from a store, you're not really into it.

Now then... Beautiful description, Loquacious. I really want a latte.
posted by Triode at 8:34 PM on March 9, 2005

fff: I believe the Barista is a rebadged Saeco. Check the CG user reviews for tips and whatnot.

Until recently the height of home espresso geekery was PID'ing your Silvia. Lately Silvia has been eclipsed by heat exchanger models (that the geeks promptly want to drop a PID in).
posted by turbodog at 9:19 PM on March 9, 2005

thx, mang.
posted by five fresh fish at 9:04 AM on March 10, 2005

I work as a barista and just got a naked PF for my home machine, and let me tell you. Coffee is not just coffee, just as wine is not just wine, and cigars are not just cigars.

Don't understand what all the rage is about? Seek out some place you can be sure you're being served top notch espresso, and feel it for yourself.

I drink espressos and ristrettos pretty much all day, and my eyes water slightly at the first sip of the day every time. So.. much.. taste.. :)


(and hi! this was my first post. been lurking for years)
posted by flippant at 11:09 AM on March 10, 2005

I shouldn't mention that I was Pope Cappuccino I of the Church of Jesus Christ Caffeinated, then?

I would grant a plenary indulgence to anyone in town who could make a ristretto...
posted by Samizdata at 12:51 PM on March 10, 2005

Welcome flippant!

Did you make it yourself? I'm dying to get a 2nd PF and throw it under my neighbor's drill press.
posted by turbodog at 1:54 PM on March 10, 2005