Modern artists don't give a shit... or do they?
January 29, 2006 7:04 PM Subscribe
I love that the excretion of this epic poop took place on a bowling lane.
posted by Dr. Wu at 7:15 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by Dr. Wu at 7:15 PM on January 29, 2006
Watch out, he might turn into a werewolf.
posted by homunculus at 7:18 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by homunculus at 7:18 PM on January 29, 2006
I am amazed that this breakthrough did not come to us from Japan.
posted by Krrrlson at 7:19 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by Krrrlson at 7:19 PM on January 29, 2006
poooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooop.
posted by soiled cowboy at 7:21 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by soiled cowboy at 7:21 PM on January 29, 2006
I think I read a David Sedaris story about this once.
posted by ColdChef at 7:22 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by ColdChef at 7:22 PM on January 29, 2006
I was really hoping I'd open this and find that I was no longer the only user of the "defecation" tag.
Help a guy out, fff.
posted by weston at 7:22 PM on January 29, 2006
Help a guy out, fff.
posted by weston at 7:22 PM on January 29, 2006
She should start a blog.
posted by TimeFactor at 7:31 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by TimeFactor at 7:31 PM on January 29, 2006
longest fake poop
I guess that makes it the longest bullshit !
posted by lobstah at 7:33 PM on January 29, 2006
I guess that makes it the longest bullshit !
posted by lobstah at 7:33 PM on January 29, 2006
It's about time the Jackass crew added a female to the roster.
posted by dgaicun at 7:37 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by dgaicun at 7:37 PM on January 29, 2006
This is exactly the sort of thing I always hoped to find on the Interweb.
posted by Joey Michaels at 7:39 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by Joey Michaels at 7:39 PM on January 29, 2006
Alright, that's it, I've seen all there is to see on the web. I can't think of anything else I haven't seen. Night all! I'm turning out the lights on the way out.
posted by rolypolyman at 7:39 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by rolypolyman at 7:39 PM on January 29, 2006
I want to believe.
posted by exlotuseater at 7:44 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by exlotuseater at 7:44 PM on January 29, 2006
This was so much better when I thought it was real. You've killed Mr. Hanky for me, jassamyn. I don't want to hear one word about the easter bunny.
posted by cytherea at 7:58 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by cytherea at 7:58 PM on January 29, 2006
I doubt that after a fiber rich diet and administering a laxative, the feces would be that solid.
Or, to be more succinct, I don't believe this shit.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 8:10 PM on January 29, 2006
Or, to be more succinct, I don't believe this shit.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 8:10 PM on January 29, 2006
Fake, stupid, pretentious. That V.V. article highlights some other "ordeal art," much of which is as fake, as stupid, and as pretentious.
From the article, referring to one of the artists' work:
"The data collected may be as impractical and useless— therefore artlike..."
The bar has been lowered so close the ground that when someone shits they call it art. I hope these miserable hacks have to take up jobs as terrible as their art to keep from starving. I wish them nothing but the worst.
posted by BlackLeotardFront at 8:12 PM on January 29, 2006
From the article, referring to one of the artists' work:
"The data collected may be as impractical and useless— therefore artlike..."
The bar has been lowered so close the ground that when someone shits they call it art. I hope these miserable hacks have to take up jobs as terrible as their art to keep from starving. I wish them nothing but the worst.
posted by BlackLeotardFront at 8:12 PM on January 29, 2006
Ack, the first time I clicked on jessamyn's link it didn't work!
Still, satisfying to know I can tell shit from shinola.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 8:17 PM on January 29, 2006
Still, satisfying to know I can tell shit from shinola.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 8:17 PM on January 29, 2006
Aristoscats, rather.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 8:26 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 8:26 PM on January 29, 2006
Being serious now.
Shit is poisonous, so the idea of plugging up your poop for a week is a dangerous idea.
My dad had 2 brothers who died in infancy where their bowels tied themselves into a knot, rendering them unable to shit. The shit trapped inside slowly poisoned them, leading to a slow death.
This happened in the late 30s / early 40s out in the country, so I'm guessing medicine has come a long way since then (duh).
(One died before dad was born, one when he was a kid. Dad can remember the poor tyke spending whole nights throwing up before he passed. Very sad.)
posted by uncanny hengeman at 8:32 PM on January 29, 2006
Shit is poisonous, so the idea of plugging up your poop for a week is a dangerous idea.
My dad had 2 brothers who died in infancy where their bowels tied themselves into a knot, rendering them unable to shit. The shit trapped inside slowly poisoned them, leading to a slow death.
This happened in the late 30s / early 40s out in the country, so I'm guessing medicine has come a long way since then (duh).
(One died before dad was born, one when he was a kid. Dad can remember the poor tyke spending whole nights throwing up before he passed. Very sad.)
posted by uncanny hengeman at 8:32 PM on January 29, 2006
EXCREMEDITATION!
posted by loquacious at 8:37 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by loquacious at 8:37 PM on January 29, 2006
thank god i clicked on that right as i put a cool ranch dorito in my pie hole. ack!
posted by nola at 8:45 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by nola at 8:45 PM on January 29, 2006
The length was suprising, but the fact that it was a woman who did it is far more so.
Just seems so fratboyish.
posted by delmoi at 8:48 PM on January 29, 2006
Just seems so fratboyish.
posted by delmoi at 8:48 PM on January 29, 2006
Well, anyway she has a bright future in japanese porn.
posted by delmoi at 8:49 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by delmoi at 8:49 PM on January 29, 2006
The bar has been lowered so close the ground that when someone shits they call it art.
Yes, but that's the whole idea.
posted by delmoi at 8:51 PM on January 29, 2006
Yes, but that's the whole idea.
posted by delmoi at 8:51 PM on January 29, 2006
For those of you who want to see some real monster shits, you could do a lot worse than visit this site.
http://www.ratemypoo.com/ratemy/poo
Check out this proud chap, posing next to his poo.
And then there was the site dedicated to the little monkeys who liked to snap a loaf in a urinal and then take a photo of it.
http://www.urinalpoop.org/
Sadly, I think the site is no more.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 8:52 PM on January 29, 2006
http://www.ratemypoo.com/ratemy/poo
Check out this proud chap, posing next to his poo.
And then there was the site dedicated to the little monkeys who liked to snap a loaf in a urinal and then take a photo of it.
http://www.urinalpoop.org/
Sadly, I think the site is no more.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 8:52 PM on January 29, 2006
Well, anyway she has a bright future in japanese porn.
Only if they bid higher than the Germans.
posted by Rothko at 8:52 PM on January 29, 2006
Only if they bid higher than the Germans.
posted by Rothko at 8:52 PM on January 29, 2006
Try again.
Check out this proud chap, posing next to his poo.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 8:54 PM on January 29, 2006
Check out this proud chap, posing next to his poo.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 8:54 PM on January 29, 2006
Hmm, that's odd - I swear I remember actually chewing my corn...
posted by hypersloth at 8:57 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by hypersloth at 8:57 PM on January 29, 2006
I'd give anything for an animated GIF of this. Well, almost anything...
posted by milnak at 8:58 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by milnak at 8:58 PM on January 29, 2006
Sending in a photo of your 6 year old son's poo to be rated. Is that legal???!
posted by uncanny hengeman at 8:59 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by uncanny hengeman at 8:59 PM on January 29, 2006
If we can't agree that some stupid anti-ordeal-ordeal about the longest shit isn't well, shit rather than art, then I say aw fuck it.
What an idiot. This would be really stupid, if it were true. That it was meant as some kind of "statement" makes it much, much more than really stupid, and makes me want to smack the "artist." (And those aren't scare quotes -- they're mock quotes).
posted by teece at 9:09 PM on January 29, 2006
What an idiot. This would be really stupid, if it were true. That it was meant as some kind of "statement" makes it much, much more than really stupid, and makes me want to smack the "artist." (And those aren't scare quotes -- they're mock quotes).
posted by teece at 9:09 PM on January 29, 2006
teece, you should give the artist some slack. It's conceptual. It doesn't matter if it really happened--it's the emotional truth that's important. And it seemed very sincere. Even if it wasn't all real, it was probably agony to go through--No one should have to get reamed out on Oprah like that.
posted by cytherea at 9:28 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by cytherea at 9:28 PM on January 29, 2006
http://www.ratemypoo.com/ratemy/poo
Well, now I've seen everything I ever want to on the web. Internets, it's been grand, drop me a line sometime.
posted by jokeefe at 10:15 PM on January 29, 2006
Well, now I've seen everything I ever want to on the web. Internets, it's been grand, drop me a line sometime.
posted by jokeefe at 10:15 PM on January 29, 2006
The weeklong endurance prior to the event was ensured by the employment of a plug specifically designed to curtail any premature excretions.
That can't have been comfortable.
posted by clevershark at 10:18 PM on January 29, 2006
That can't have been comfortable.
posted by clevershark at 10:18 PM on January 29, 2006
rolypolyman writes "Alright, that's it, I've seen all there is to see on the web"
The end of the internet.
posted by clevershark at 10:23 PM on January 29, 2006
The end of the internet.
posted by clevershark at 10:23 PM on January 29, 2006
I'm trying to come up with a caption for this one.
posted by brundlefly at 10:25 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by brundlefly at 10:25 PM on January 29, 2006
I'm trying to come up with a caption for this one.
"Duuuuude!"
posted by uncanny hengeman at 10:36 PM on January 29, 2006
"Duuuuude!"
posted by uncanny hengeman at 10:36 PM on January 29, 2006
Yet another reason why people think artists are usually fucking idiots. What a perfect example.
posted by drstein at 10:44 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by drstein at 10:44 PM on January 29, 2006
You know what creeps me out? The rate my poo pics without any toilet paper in them.
posted by Jawn at 10:46 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by Jawn at 10:46 PM on January 29, 2006
Oh, god, Jawn... You just ruined my evening. Are you happy? Are you happy?
posted by brundlefly at 10:51 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by brundlefly at 10:51 PM on January 29, 2006
Is anyone else imagining her saying "Vrrrrooooom!" in fandango_matt's gif?
*crickets*
Just me? Okay. Nevermind.
posted by brundlefly at 10:58 PM on January 29, 2006
*crickets*
Just me? Okay. Nevermind.
posted by brundlefly at 10:58 PM on January 29, 2006
This goes out to every cranky philistine who ever visited a modern art exhibition and said loudly "what's next? Take a massive dump on the floor and call it art?"
posted by George_Spiggott at 11:02 PM on January 29, 2006
posted by George_Spiggott at 11:02 PM on January 29, 2006
Wasn't this sort of suspect on the face of it? No one's colon is 26 feet long. Your small intestine maybe, but your colon isn't nearly that long.
posted by hwestiii at 1:57 AM on January 30, 2006
posted by hwestiii at 1:57 AM on January 30, 2006
Well done everybody! Hines for her art, and the thread participants for theirs. This week I am mostly not being too dismissive of modern art.
Gilbert and George made me think when they said that poo is the first thing that we create. They do like to wallow in it a bit, though:
'The artists first used excrement as a theme in their 1983 work entitled Shitted, in which the artists superimposed photographs of themselves facing each other in front of a wall of vastly magnified, orange-brown turds. Gilbert & George are shown wearing blue and green with the same brown substance in their mouths. In this work, they seem to refer to themselves as the creators of the "shit" that critics claimed they brought into the art world.'
They simply reflect what they see:
'"This will be hanging in the room where we are to eat," George proudly declares. Spit on Shit is one of the Fundamental Pictures of 1996 and depicts exactly what it says - a gob of spit sliding down two monumental turds. "Very few art works are called Spit on Shit. It's about being alive in the western world," George says. "What else?"
God love them!
posted by asok at 3:25 AM on January 30, 2006
Gilbert and George made me think when they said that poo is the first thing that we create. They do like to wallow in it a bit, though:
'The artists first used excrement as a theme in their 1983 work entitled Shitted, in which the artists superimposed photographs of themselves facing each other in front of a wall of vastly magnified, orange-brown turds. Gilbert & George are shown wearing blue and green with the same brown substance in their mouths. In this work, they seem to refer to themselves as the creators of the "shit" that critics claimed they brought into the art world.'
They simply reflect what they see:
'"This will be hanging in the room where we are to eat," George proudly declares. Spit on Shit is one of the Fundamental Pictures of 1996 and depicts exactly what it says - a gob of spit sliding down two monumental turds. "Very few art works are called Spit on Shit. It's about being alive in the western world," George says. "What else?"
God love them!
posted by asok at 3:25 AM on January 30, 2006
The original, inimitable, unsurpassed Merde d'artiste.
posted by funambulist at 5:10 AM on January 30, 2006
posted by funambulist at 5:10 AM on January 30, 2006
From jessamyn's Voice link:
"I guess for me it didn't seem necessary to actually have done the thing. Today you don't really have to do anything."
They can carve that on humanity's grave when we finally bore ourselves to death.
posted by languagehat at 5:38 AM on January 30, 2006
"I guess for me it didn't seem necessary to actually have done the thing. Today you don't really have to do anything."
They can carve that on humanity's grave when we finally bore ourselves to death.
posted by languagehat at 5:38 AM on January 30, 2006
Whoever is commissioned to do the carving will most likely carve "Whatever" instead.
posted by Gator at 6:51 AM on January 30, 2006
posted by Gator at 6:51 AM on January 30, 2006
What is odd to me is that pieces like this—those that aim at triggering an emotional reaction that's implicitly the primary context for the work—are not seen as the banal and idiotic cliches that they really are. Other works of art that crudely trigger banal emotions such as love or nostalgia are properly ridiculed by those who nevertheless see the context of, for example, disgust to be more than sophomoric and cliched. Why?
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 7:26 AM on January 30, 2006
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 7:26 AM on January 30, 2006
fandango_matt, somewhere Terry Gilliam is giggling himself shitless over your GIF.
posted by rosemere at 8:31 AM on January 30, 2006
posted by rosemere at 8:31 AM on January 30, 2006
Bandwidth exceeded (on lead link). Gee...what a surprise.
Asinine shitheads.
posted by codeofconduct at 1:08 PM on January 30, 2006
Asinine shitheads.
posted by codeofconduct at 1:08 PM on January 30, 2006
Who are they crappin'? : )
posted by SisterHavana at 7:58 PM on January 30, 2006
posted by SisterHavana at 7:58 PM on January 30, 2006
Drat. Bandwith exceeded by the time I got to it.
"Metafilter: Let us help you exceed your bandwith!"
posted by WaterSprite at 8:10 PM on January 30, 2006
"Metafilter: Let us help you exceed your bandwith!"
posted by WaterSprite at 8:10 PM on January 30, 2006
Don't worry. fandango_matt's gif still makes the thread worthwhile.
(I'm not hearing "Vrrrrooooom!" while watching it, though. Unfortunately, it's the Benny Hill theme for me.)
posted by rosemere at 10:23 PM on January 30, 2006
(I'm not hearing "Vrrrrooooom!" while watching it, though. Unfortunately, it's the Benny Hill theme for me.)
posted by rosemere at 10:23 PM on January 30, 2006
Those aren't mutually exclusive, rosemere.
posted by brundlefly at 10:25 PM on January 30, 2006
posted by brundlefly at 10:25 PM on January 30, 2006
Memepool has a link to some genuine record-breakers. Link leads to DVDs for sale... the great taste of Pepsi Brown.
posted by Aknaton at 10:09 PM on February 2, 2006
posted by Aknaton at 10:09 PM on February 2, 2006
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