YAD KCOL SPAC
October 21, 2006 9:03 PM Subscribe
OCTOBER 22 IS INTERNATIONAL CAPS LOCK DAY!!!
EVERY YEAR WE GET TOGETHER AND MAKE SALMON FOR TOAST, EVERY YEAR WE GET A CROCKETY BLOAT, EVERY YEAR WE GET DRUNK ON THE DOCKS, AND EVERY YEAR WE HAVE SEX WITH OUR CAPS LOCKS!!!!
EVERY YEAR WE GET TOGETHER AND MAKE SALMON FOR TOAST, EVERY YEAR WE GET A CROCKETY BLOAT, EVERY YEAR WE GET DRUNK ON THE DOCKS, AND EVERY YEAR WE HAVE SEX WITH OUR CAPS LOCKS!!!!
Does anyone else prefer people who write in all caps to people who refuse to capitalize altogether?
posted by Astro Zombie at 9:10 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by Astro Zombie at 9:10 PM on October 21, 2006
PARTY POOOPER!!!!!!
posted by Falconetti at 9:12 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by Falconetti at 9:12 PM on October 21, 2006
LOL ROTFLMAO OH GAWD I HAVE A HANGOVER ALREADY MAKE IT STOP
posted by CynicalKnight at 9:12 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by CynicalKnight at 9:12 PM on October 21, 2006
SHIFT+SPACEDOESN'TWORKINUBUNTU,WHICHIGUESSMEANSTHATI"MFAKINGIT!!
CAPS LOCK SOLVED MY PROBLEM!
posted by furtive at 9:12 PM on October 21, 2006
CAPS LOCK SOLVED MY PROBLEM!
posted by furtive at 9:12 PM on October 21, 2006
I WAS STANDING ON THE FRYING PANS BECAUSE BARNICLE-BEAKS WAS CELEBRATING ABOUT THE SANDWICHES! BARNICLE-BEAKS PUT THE GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICHES ON THE PANS!! I WAS STANDING ON THE SANDWICHES!!!
THIS IS BARNICLE-BEAKS!!!
I WAS YELLING ABOUT THE SANDWICHES FOR MORE THAN NINETEEN WEEKS!
I CALLED BARNICLE-BEAKS!! HE WENT TO THE DENTISTS!! HE WAS AT THE PARTY FOR THE SHRIMPS!!!
posted by The White Hat at 9:13 PM on October 21, 2006 [1 favorite]
THIS IS BARNICLE-BEAKS!!!
I WAS YELLING ABOUT THE SANDWICHES FOR MORE THAN NINETEEN WEEKS!
I CALLED BARNICLE-BEAKS!! HE WENT TO THE DENTISTS!! HE WAS AT THE PARTY FOR THE SHRIMPS!!!
posted by The White Hat at 9:13 PM on October 21, 2006 [1 favorite]
Does anyone else prefer people who write in all caps to people who refuse to capitalize altogether?
nope
posted by knave at 9:14 PM on October 21, 2006
nope
posted by knave at 9:14 PM on October 21, 2006
WHAT THE HELL? NOBODY TOLD ME ABOUT ANY DOCKS! AND HERE I AM JUST DRUNK.
posted by sysinfo at 9:14 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by sysinfo at 9:14 PM on October 21, 2006
IS THE USE OF CAPS LOCK AND EXCLAMATIONS REDUNDANT? DISCUSS!
posted by dhammond at 9:15 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by dhammond at 9:15 PM on October 21, 2006
<cellphone> THX MATHOWIE A+++++++++ WOULD TROLL AGAIN
<SALMONBERRY> YAY!
<SALMONBERRY> SOMEONE SEND HAUGHEY SOME SALMON FOR TOAST
<cellphone> I'LL SUCK HIS DICK
<cellphone> CROSSPOST THAT ASAP
<Krrrlson> AWESOME IT'S FIXED
<Krrrlson> This post was deleted for the following reason: the newer one is better.
<Krrrlson> DAMN RIGHT BITCH
posted by quonsar at 9:15 PM on October 21, 2006
<SALMONBERRY> YAY!
<SALMONBERRY> SOMEONE SEND HAUGHEY SOME SALMON FOR TOAST
<cellphone> I'LL SUCK HIS DICK
<cellphone> CROSSPOST THAT ASAP
<Krrrlson> AWESOME IT'S FIXED
<Krrrlson> This post was deleted for the following reason: the newer one is better.
<Krrrlson> DAMN RIGHT BITCH
posted by quonsar at 9:15 PM on October 21, 2006
It's still October 21 where I be at. Three more hours till lock.
posted by strangeleftydoublethink at 9:19 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by strangeleftydoublethink at 9:19 PM on October 21, 2006
I AM PERSONALLY OPPOSED TO THIS KIND OF SHOUTING ONLINE, BUT WHAT THE HELL... NO ONE PAYS ATTENTION TO ANYTHING I SAY ANYWAY.
COULD YOU PLEASE TURN THAT DOWN, I AM TRYING TO YELL HERE.
posted by squidfartz at 9:20 PM on October 21, 2006
COULD YOU PLEASE TURN THAT DOWN, I AM TRYING TO YELL HERE.
posted by squidfartz at 9:20 PM on October 21, 2006
E. E. CUMMINGS
(To quote Chris Rock: There, I said it — somebody had to say it!)
posted by rob511 at 9:20 PM on October 21, 2006
(To quote Chris Rock: There, I said it — somebody had to say it!)
posted by rob511 at 9:20 PM on October 21, 2006
PRECIPITATEI AM HAPPY TO PARTICIPATE IN THIS TRADITION FOR THE FIRST TIME OF MY LIFE. UNFORTUNATELY I AM NOT DRUNK. I ONLY HAD ONE BEER AND THAT MAKES ME TEH SADNESS.
TEH SADNESS!!! IT IS STILL THE 21ST HERE IN THE STATES AND I AM POSTING IN THE CAPSLOCK THREAD ON METAFILTER....ON A SATURDAY NIGHT. SOMEONE SEND ME SOME DIGITAL B00Z3.
posted by Mister Cheese at 9:21 PM on October 21, 2006
TEH SADNESS!!! IT IS STILL THE 21ST HERE IN THE STATES AND I AM POSTING IN THE CAPSLOCK THREAD ON METAFILTER....ON A SATURDAY NIGHT. SOMEONE SEND ME SOME DIGITAL B00Z3.
posted by Mister Cheese at 9:21 PM on October 21, 2006
ARE NO CRACKER BARREL SEAMSTRESS RAPISTS ENGAGING THE PREMIUM REMITTANCE ENVELOPE? WILL SEVERAL AUTISTIC PANTSFISH SPELL RELIEF? WILL DMD CONTACT MY AGENT WITHOUT A GLIMMER OF HAUSFRAU CROTCHMAGNETISM? ONLY CAPSLOCK KNOWS FOR SURE.
posted by quonsar at 9:25 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by quonsar at 9:25 PM on October 21, 2006
/ MAKES TEH SALMON
/ TOASTS TEH TOAST
/ ADMIRES CROCKETY BLOAT
/ DRINKS TEH DOCKS
/ SEXES UP TEH CAPS KEYS
posted by madamjujujive at 9:26 PM on October 21, 2006
/ TOASTS TEH TOAST
/ ADMIRES CROCKETY BLOAT
/ DRINKS TEH DOCKS
/ SEXES UP TEH CAPS KEYS
posted by madamjujujive at 9:26 PM on October 21, 2006
the boys i mean are not refined
the boys i mean are not refined
they go with girls who buck and bite
they do not give a fuck for luck
they hump them thirteen times a night
one hangs a hat upon her tit
one carves a cross on her behind
they do not give a shit for wit
the boys i mean are not refined
they come with girls who bite and buck
who cannot read and cannot write
who laugh like they would fall apart
and masturbate with dynamite
the boys i mean are not refined
they cannot chat of that and this
they do not give a fart for art
they kill like you would take a piss
they speak whatever's on their mind
they do whatever's in their pants
the boys i mean are not refined
they shake the mountains when they dance
(ee cummings day was last week? FUCK.)
posted by Remy at 9:26 PM on October 21, 2006 [2 favorites]
the boys i mean are not refined
they go with girls who buck and bite
they do not give a fuck for luck
they hump them thirteen times a night
one hangs a hat upon her tit
one carves a cross on her behind
they do not give a shit for wit
the boys i mean are not refined
they come with girls who bite and buck
who cannot read and cannot write
who laugh like they would fall apart
and masturbate with dynamite
the boys i mean are not refined
they cannot chat of that and this
they do not give a fart for art
they kill like you would take a piss
they speak whatever's on their mind
they do whatever's in their pants
the boys i mean are not refined
they shake the mountains when they dance
(ee cummings day was last week? FUCK.)
posted by Remy at 9:26 PM on October 21, 2006 [2 favorites]
LOUD NOISES!
posted by c:\awesome at 9:32 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by c:\awesome at 9:32 PM on October 21, 2006
There has been quite enough foolishness in this thread, and y'all should put a lid on it. In other words, it's time to cap schlock.
OR AM I REACHING?
posted by diddlegnome at 9:33 PM on October 21, 2006
OR AM I REACHING?
posted by diddlegnome at 9:33 PM on October 21, 2006
DÍA INTERNACIONAL DEL BLOQUEO DE MAYÚSCULAS
EN ESPANOL MOFOS!
posted by Salmonberry at 9:33 PM on October 21, 2006
EN ESPANOL MOFOS!
posted by Salmonberry at 9:33 PM on October 21, 2006
tRUE cAPS lOCKERS TURN ON THE CAPS LOCK BUT THEN TYPE WITH THE sHIFT KEY AS WELL.
aMATEURS.
posted by Dipsomaniac at 9:36 PM on October 21, 2006
aMATEURS.
posted by Dipsomaniac at 9:36 PM on October 21, 2006
Funny, according to Bizarre News, today's babbling day. Tomorrow is National Nut Day and I don't know what that means. So here's a little penis tree action for you.
posted by fenriq at 9:44 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by fenriq at 9:44 PM on October 21, 2006
OCTOBER 22ND IS ALSO CAPS LOCK EXAM AWARENESS DAY. WHEN IS THE LAST TIME YOU CHECKED YOUR CAPS LOCK KEY FOR LUMPS?
posted by furtive at 9:52 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by furtive at 9:52 PM on October 21, 2006
not this shit again...
posted by homunculus at 9:54 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by homunculus at 9:54 PM on October 21, 2006
OMFG I'M YELLIN THIS TO EVERYONE!!!
posted by Cyclopsis Raptor at 9:55 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by Cyclopsis Raptor at 9:55 PM on October 21, 2006
IF I HAD 45 VAGINAS THEN I WOULD FUCK ALL THE DICKS ON THAT PENIS TREE
posted by jefbla at 9:55 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by jefbla at 9:55 PM on October 21, 2006
MY PENIS IS STUCK IN THE KEYBORED NOW
posted by IronLizard at 9:55 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by IronLizard at 9:55 PM on October 21, 2006
I am in the same boat as strangeleftydoublethink; what a sad uncapitalized boat it is.
Also, I disabled capslock awhile back, so when the day does roll around I'll be having to fake it and hope that no one catches on.
The shame is unbearable.
posted by Stunt at 9:59 PM on October 21, 2006
Also, I disabled capslock awhile back, so when the day does roll around I'll be having to fake it and hope that no one catches on.
The shame is unbearable.
posted by Stunt at 9:59 PM on October 21, 2006
OMG I SUXORNO CAPS keyboard
These guys want to kill your buzz. O WAIT SRY I MEANT "KILL YR BUZZ." KTHXBAI.
posted by neda at 10:08 PM on October 21, 2006
These guys want to kill your buzz. O WAIT SRY I MEANT "KILL YR BUZZ." KTHXBAI.
posted by neda at 10:08 PM on October 21, 2006
BUT I HAVE MY CAPS LOCKS KEY MAPPED TO COMMAND- FOR EMACS, AM DRUNK AND AM HAVING TO TYPE THIS WHILE KEEPING ONE OF MY PINKIES ON THE SHIFT KEY. SEND REINFORCEMENTS.
posted by jperkins at 10:19 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by jperkins at 10:19 PM on October 21, 2006
OOPS, MAKE THAT COMMAND-, NOT CONTROL-. DID I MENTION I WAS DRUNK?
posted by jperkins at 10:22 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by jperkins at 10:22 PM on October 21, 2006
not this shit again...
posted by homunculus at 12:54 AM EST on October 22
IT'S REALLY FUCKING EASY TO SIMPLY NOT CLICK SOMETHING!!
posted by knave at 10:26 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by homunculus at 12:54 AM EST on October 22
IT'S REALLY FUCKING EASY TO SIMPLY NOT CLICK SOMETHING!!
posted by knave at 10:26 PM on October 21, 2006
Not to relive past history, or my utter, utter contempt for Caps Lock day, but I really wish that I could repost the moment that I popped off my Caps Lock Key, set it on fire, took a picture of it, and pissed off all you fuckers.
Alas, I moved out of the apartment and lost said key.
Then, the house I moved into got robbed and the camera and computer that housed the pic got stolen by some fuckwad that, additionally, robbed the liquor cabinet.
Now, I live with someone that would never use the Caps Lock key (Hell, she won't even use the Shift key) but I'm not willing to gamble my balls to even try to pry that precious piece of plastic from her computer, just because I wouldn't want her to find out and do something awfully bad to me while I'm asleep.
So go. Party like it's 1583, when everything began with those F's that were secretly S's.
Just let it be known that I had nothing to do with it, and I still. hate. you. all.
(good so see Salmonberry around, though!)
posted by Ufez Jones at 10:27 PM on October 21, 2006 [1 favorite]
Alas, I moved out of the apartment and lost said key.
Then, the house I moved into got robbed and the camera and computer that housed the pic got stolen by some fuckwad that, additionally, robbed the liquor cabinet.
Now, I live with someone that would never use the Caps Lock key (Hell, she won't even use the Shift key) but I'm not willing to gamble my balls to even try to pry that precious piece of plastic from her computer, just because I wouldn't want her to find out and do something awfully bad to me while I'm asleep.
So go. Party like it's 1583, when everything began with those F's that were secretly S's.
Just let it be known that I had nothing to do with it, and I still. hate. you. all.
(good so see Salmonberry around, though!)
posted by Ufez Jones at 10:27 PM on October 21, 2006 [1 favorite]
WOOHOO! HOW LONG TIL THE LOLKOPTER?
posted by somethingotherthan at 10:29 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by somethingotherthan at 10:29 PM on October 21, 2006
HOW LONG UNTIL ALL YOUR BASE AND WEBVAN REFERENCES ARE DUSTED OFF AND FOUND TO BE RETRO AND HILARIOUS?
posted by TwelveTwo at 10:32 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by TwelveTwo at 10:32 PM on October 21, 2006
NEWS FLASH 2006 THIS IS A PICTURE OF A POTATO
posted by Steve_at_Linnwood at 10:45 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by Steve_at_Linnwood at 10:45 PM on October 21, 2006
MY CAPS LOCK KEY SAYS "caps lock" IN LOWERCASE!
STUPID APPLE!
posted by Steve_at_Linnwood at 10:49 PM on October 21, 2006
STUPID APPLE!
posted by Steve_at_Linnwood at 10:49 PM on October 21, 2006
WE SHLD DO TALK LIEK A PIR8 DAY AND CAPSLK DAY ALL @ ONCE! YARRLOL!
posted by Malor at 10:54 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by Malor at 10:54 PM on October 21, 2006
I AM IN UR KEYS, ACTIVATING UR CAPS?
I DON'T THINK THAT ONE'S VERY FUNNY.
MAYBE I SHOULD JUST RESORT TO SILLY CAT PICTURES. OR MAYBE AN ANIMATED GIF OF THE ADAMA MANEUVER (AS SEEN ON FRIDAY'S BSG).
ALSO, THERE IS NOT ENOUGH TELEGRAPH HUMOR IN THIS THREAD.
posted by sparkletone at 10:54 PM on October 21, 2006
I DON'T THINK THAT ONE'S VERY FUNNY.
MAYBE I SHOULD JUST RESORT TO SILLY CAT PICTURES. OR MAYBE AN ANIMATED GIF OF THE ADAMA MANEUVER (AS SEEN ON FRIDAY'S BSG).
ALSO, THERE IS NOT ENOUGH TELEGRAPH HUMOR IN THIS THREAD.
posted by sparkletone at 10:54 PM on October 21, 2006
.. .- --. .-. . . - .... . .-. . -. . . -.. ... - --- -... . -- --- .-. . - . .-.. . --. .-. .- .--. .... .... ..- -- --- .-. .. -. - .... .. ... - .... .-. . .- -..
.-.. --- .-.. -.-. .- .--. ... .-.. --- -.-. -.- .-.. --- .-..
posted by Steve_at_Linnwood at 10:57 PM on October 21, 2006
.-.. --- .-.. -.-. .- .--. ... .-.. --- -.-. -.- .-.. --- .-..
posted by Steve_at_Linnwood at 10:57 PM on October 21, 2006
I THINK I FELL ASLEEP READING THIS. I'M OKAY, LOCKED IN FOR THE DAY. NOT MY THING, ALL CAPS. SEEMS LAZY. SLEEPY, I'M SO SLEEPY..............................
posted by BillyElmore at 11:09 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by BillyElmore at 11:09 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by homunculus at 11:26 PM on October 21, 2006
FUCK YOUR BLINK TAG
posted by secret about box at 11:29 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by secret about box at 11:29 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by wendell at 11:30 PM on October 21, 2006 [1 favorite]
THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ALL SCROLLY AND SHIT TO CONTRAST YOUR POST
BUT IT IS NOT
BECAUSE METAFILTER STRIPPED THE TAG
GOATFUCKER WEB SITE
posted by secret about box at 11:31 PM on October 21, 2006
BUT IT IS NOT
BECAUSE METAFILTER STRIPPED THE TAG
GOATFUCKER WEB SITE
posted by secret about box at 11:31 PM on October 21, 2006
MORSE CODE NOT QUITE WHAT I HAD IN MIND.
SOMETHING MORE LIKE:
AM RESERVING TWO TICKETS FOR YOU FOR MY PREMIERE. COME AND BRING A FRIEND IF YOU HAVE ANY.
IMPOSSIBLE TO BE PRESENT FOR THE FIRST PERFORMANCE. WILL ATTEND THE SECOND IF THERE IS ONE.
OR THE APOCRYPHAL CARY GRANT EXCHANGE.
PS: THIS IS THE MOST I'VE USED MY CAPSLOCK KEY IN THE LAST FOUR YEARS (AS I WAS NOT AN OBSERVER OF THIS DAY UNTIL TODAY).
posted by sparkletone at 11:31 PM on October 21, 2006
SOMETHING MORE LIKE:
AM RESERVING TWO TICKETS FOR YOU FOR MY PREMIERE. COME AND BRING A FRIEND IF YOU HAVE ANY.
IMPOSSIBLE TO BE PRESENT FOR THE FIRST PERFORMANCE. WILL ATTEND THE SECOND IF THERE IS ONE.
OR THE APOCRYPHAL CARY GRANT EXCHANGE.
PS: THIS IS THE MOST I'VE USED MY CAPSLOCK KEY IN THE LAST FOUR YEARS (AS I WAS NOT AN OBSERVER OF THIS DAY UNTIL TODAY).
posted by sparkletone at 11:31 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by secret about box at 11:32 PM on October 21, 2006
tRUE cAPS lOCKERS TURN ON THE CAPS LOCK BUT THEN TYPE WITH THE sHIFT KEY AS WELL.
aMATEURS.
THIS DOESN'T ACTUALLY WORK ON MY MAC. MY GOOD TYPING HABITS REMAIN, BUT THE SHIFT KEY DOESN'T INVERT THE CAPSLOCKINATION.
SADNESS.
posted by sparkletone at 11:35 PM on October 21, 2006
aMATEURS.
THIS DOESN'T ACTUALLY WORK ON MY MAC. MY GOOD TYPING HABITS REMAIN, BUT THE SHIFT KEY DOESN'T INVERT THE CAPSLOCKINATION.
SADNESS.
posted by sparkletone at 11:35 PM on October 21, 2006
IT'S REALLY FUCKING EASY TO SIMPLY NOT CLICK SOMETHING!!
WHAT EVIDENCE DO YOU HAVE FOR THIS? WHEN HAS ANYONE EVER NOT CLICKED ON SOMETHING? NO ONE CAN RESIST, THAT'S WHY WE'RE ALL HERE SCREAMING AT EACH OTHER ALL THE TIME. WAKE THE FUCK UP, MAN.
posted by homunculus at 11:43 PM on October 21, 2006
WHAT EVIDENCE DO YOU HAVE FOR THIS? WHEN HAS ANYONE EVER NOT CLICKED ON SOMETHING? NO ONE CAN RESIST, THAT'S WHY WE'RE ALL HERE SCREAMING AT EACH OTHER ALL THE TIME. WAKE THE FUCK UP, MAN.
posted by homunculus at 11:43 PM on October 21, 2006
That's it. I'm releasing Astro Zombie 3 into this thread.
posted by Astro Zombie at 11:48 PM on October 21, 2006
posted by Astro Zombie at 11:48 PM on October 21, 2006
HROOWR GRRR RORRRW B B B B HC GREE FFFFFFFF RORWRORORORORO GAH FFFFTH BRGRRRR HUNGRY!!!
posted by Astro Zombie 3 at 11:49 PM on October 21, 2006 [1 favorite]
posted by Astro Zombie 3 at 11:49 PM on October 21, 2006 [1 favorite]
GREEN CARD LOTTERY 1994 MAY BE THE NEXT ONE! THE DEADLINE HAS BEEN ANNOUNCED.
THERE IS A STRICT JUNE DEADLINE. THE TIME TO START IS NOW!!
posted by Charlie Bucket at 11:51 PM on October 21, 2006
THERE IS A STRICT JUNE DEADLINE. THE TIME TO START IS NOW!!
posted by Charlie Bucket at 11:51 PM on October 21, 2006
OMG U GUYS MY GRANPA TYPES LIKE THIS ALL TIME HE R RETARDED LOLOLOLOL :-)
posted by emjaybee at 12:00 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by emjaybee at 12:00 AM on October 22, 2006
CROTCHMAGNET LOBSTER GUT PUSS BASKET HUMP YOUR MOM IS CEILING CAT DAIKON TACO CRACK URCHIN MUTANT POODLE CUBE BAT SHIT IN FRAMES OF DEFERENCE FENCE LICK
posted by loquacious at 12:21 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by loquacious at 12:21 AM on October 22, 2006
IT'S THE MOOOOOOOOOST WONDERFUL TIIIIIIME OF THE YEAR!
posted by litlnemo at 12:21 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by litlnemo at 12:21 AM on October 22, 2006
FUCKING MOONJUICE PIRATES
posted by loquacious at 12:24 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by loquacious at 12:24 AM on October 22, 2006
I DON'T THEINK YOU'RE HAPPY ENOUGH! !!! THAT'S RIGHT, I'LL TEACH YOU TO BE HAPPY11!!!! I'LL TEACH YOUR GRANDMOTHER TO SUCK EGGS!
posted by Citizen Premier at 12:25 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by Citizen Premier at 12:25 AM on October 22, 2006
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!
HE"S GUNNA BURST!!!!!!
posted by Citizen Premier at 12:35 AM on October 22, 2006
HE"S GUNNA BURST!!!!!!
posted by Citizen Premier at 12:35 AM on October 22, 2006
WAIT I DIDN'T SAY 'SALMON' OR ANYTHING.
posted by exlotuseater at 12:36 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by exlotuseater at 12:36 AM on October 22, 2006
OH GOD WORMS
IN MY BRAIN FUCKING GET THEM OUT
BURNING OH FUCK
ELVIS PICKLED MOUSE
BRAIN FUCK OH WORMS IN MY
BRAIN GET THEM PICKLED MOUSE BRAINS
OH BRAINS ELVISED SHIT PICKLES
GET THEM FUCKING
IN MY
BRAIN WORMS OH
FUCKING GOD WORMS
THEM BRAINS FUCKING
CANTALOPE BABY PICKLED
MARKLAR PECKER BRAINS
WORMY OH GOD OUT IN GET
THEM PANTS OUT OH
ELVIS WORMS IN MY
QUONSET BRAIN OUT WORMS
BURNING GOD LOCNAR
WORMS
BRAIN LOCNAR
GET
THEM MARKLAR OUT
OH FUCK MY BRAINS
OUT WORMS
FICKLE ELVIS SHIT
MY GET FECKLE FUCKED BRAINS
WORMS OH GOD GET THEM OUT
posted by loquacious at 12:40 AM on October 22, 2006 [3 favorites]
IN MY BRAIN FUCKING GET THEM OUT
BURNING OH FUCK
ELVIS PICKLED MOUSE
BRAIN FUCK OH WORMS IN MY
BRAIN GET THEM PICKLED MOUSE BRAINS
OH BRAINS ELVISED SHIT PICKLES
GET THEM FUCKING
IN MY
BRAIN WORMS OH
FUCKING GOD WORMS
THEM BRAINS FUCKING
CANTALOPE BABY PICKLED
MARKLAR PECKER BRAINS
WORMY OH GOD OUT IN GET
THEM PANTS OUT OH
ELVIS WORMS IN MY
QUONSET BRAIN OUT WORMS
BURNING GOD LOCNAR
WORMS
BRAIN LOCNAR
GET
THEM MARKLAR OUT
OH FUCK MY BRAINS
OUT WORMS
FICKLE ELVIS SHIT
MY GET FECKLE FUCKED BRAINS
WORMS OH GOD GET THEM OUT
posted by loquacious at 12:40 AM on October 22, 2006 [3 favorites]
posted by blenderfish at 12:44 AM on October 22, 2006
NICE USE OF "BOLD" MARKUP THERE.^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
posted by exlotuseater at 12:44 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by exlotuseater at 12:44 AM on October 22, 2006
THIS IS WHAT THE FUCKING END OF THE FUCKING WORLD LOOKS LIKE.
posted by loquacious at 12:45 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by loquacious at 12:45 AM on October 22, 2006
DANCING AWAY IN BABYLON
posted by loquacious at 12:47 AM on October 22, 2006 [1 favorite]
posted by loquacious at 12:47 AM on October 22, 2006 [1 favorite]
PICKLEDFUCKMOUSEPECKER
posted by loquacious at 12:50 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by loquacious at 12:50 AM on October 22, 2006
DOG NEEDS MUSTARD
posted by loquacious at 12:50 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by loquacious at 12:50 AM on October 22, 2006
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
posted by loquacious at 12:58 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by loquacious at 12:58 AM on October 22, 2006
FYI ^^^ OOLONG PANCAKE BUNNY KTHXBI
posted by loquacious at 1:21 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by loquacious at 1:21 AM on October 22, 2006
PANCAKES
posted by loquacious at 1:23 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by loquacious at 1:23 AM on October 22, 2006
DID SOMEONE SAY COCK LAPS? NO?
LOLMAO SOMEONE SAID COCK SLAP
posted by loquacious at 1:24 AM on October 22, 2006
LOLMAO SOMEONE SAID COCK SLAP
posted by loquacious at 1:24 AM on October 22, 2006
NO? OK. I GUESS I'LL DRINK THIS MYSELF SNIFF WAKE UP DAMNIT WORMS IN MY BRAIN OH GOD PICKLES GET THEM OUT
posted by loquacious at 1:30 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by loquacious at 1:30 AM on October 22, 2006
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
posted by loquacious at 1:31 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by loquacious at 1:31 AM on October 22, 2006
FUNEX?
S!
VFX!
FUNEM?
S!
VFM!
FUNET?
O.
VFNT.
IC.
AAAAAAAAAAA!
S, S.
T?
MMMMMMMMMM.....
...
...
...
S?
OK.
VFT.
UFT?
S.
O....U....
S! I AM QUITE THE CARD! I MAKE MOCK OF YOUR TEA-WANTING!
I KILL YOU FILTHY, RONALD. I KILL YOU FILTHY.
posted by Jon Mitchell at 1:38 AM on October 22, 2006
S!
VFX!
FUNEM?
S!
VFM!
FUNET?
O.
VFNT.
IC.
AAAAAAAAAAA!
S, S.
T?
MMMMMMMMMM.....
...
...
...
S?
OK.
VFT.
UFT?
S.
O....U....
S! I AM QUITE THE CARD! I MAKE MOCK OF YOUR TEA-WANTING!
I KILL YOU FILTHY, RONALD. I KILL YOU FILTHY.
posted by Jon Mitchell at 1:38 AM on October 22, 2006
OMG HAPPY SPIDERS 2 CUTE!!!OMG I AM GLAD I STAYED HOME AND SURFED THE WEB TONIGHT INSTEAD OF GOING OUT OTHERWISE I WOULD NOT HAVE KNOWN ABOUT CAPS LOCK DAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!
posted by treepour at 1:57 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by treepour at 1:57 AM on October 22, 2006
OH MAN I'M SO EXICTED I WAIT EVERY YEAR FOR THIS DAY AND WHEN IT COMES I ALWAYS TRY MY BEST TO ENJOY IT BECAUSE IT ONLY COMES ONCE A YEAR AND THAT MEANS THAT I HAVE TO WAIT ANOTHER YEAR BEFORE IT COMES AROUND AGAIN AND THAT MAKES ME SAD.
posted by joedan at 2:00 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by joedan at 2:00 AM on October 22, 2006
I AM NOT DRUNK BUT I THINK THAT PARTICLE PHYSICS WOULD BE IMPROVED BY HAVING MORE PENGUINS IN ITS NARRATIVE AND IVE EMAILED A LOT OF FAMOUS PHYSICISTS ABOUT THIS IDEA BUT NO ONE EVER RESPONDS WHICH PROVES THERES A CONSPIRACY TO SUPPRESS THE TRUTH ABOUT PENGUINS AND BOSONS AND STUFF WELL THATS ABOUT ALL TRUTH OUT BYE
posted by Slithy_Tove at 2:40 AM on October 22, 2006 [2 favorites]
HELLO DEAR SIRS I AM PLEASED TO MAKE YOUR AQUAINTANCE.
PAK.
CHOOIE.
UNF.
posted by icosahedral at 3:23 AM on October 22, 2006
PAK.
CHOOIE.
UNF.
posted by icosahedral at 3:23 AM on October 22, 2006
GETITRIGHTFUCKINUPYE
posted by sgt.serenity at 3:44 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by sgt.serenity at 3:44 AM on October 22, 2006
OH CAPS LOCK DAY OH CAPS LOCK DAY
OUR FUNNY POSTING IMAGE DAY
OH CAPS LOCK DAY OH CAPS LOCK DAY
YOUR EYESIGHT WILL NOW MELT AWAY
posted by eriko at 4:52 AM on October 22, 2006
OUR FUNNY POSTING IMAGE DAY
OH CAPS LOCK DAY OH CAPS LOCK DAY
YOUR EYESIGHT WILL NOW MELT AWAY
posted by eriko at 4:52 AM on October 22, 2006
I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT!!!!!
LOUD NOISES!!!!!
posted by thekilgore at 5:20 AM on October 22, 2006
LOUD NOISES!!!!!
posted by thekilgore at 5:20 AM on October 22, 2006
FINER THAN OUR GERMAN KNIVES?!?!?!?!
posted by milquetoast at 5:55 AM on October 22, 2006 [1 favorite]
posted by milquetoast at 5:55 AM on October 22, 2006 [1 favorite]
Epson Modification
From: Steven
Date: Sun, Jul 18 1982 4:59 am
Email: Steven@sri-unix
Groups: net.micro
Does anyone know if I can get a modification for an Epson MX-80F/T so that I can use the full 128 ASCII character set, rather than the 96 ASCII character set supplied by Epson? I would like to use the epson for term papers, and my teachers frown on all-caps...
Thanx a bunch,
=Steve=
posted by ?! at 6:18 AM on October 22, 2006
From: Steven
Date: Sun, Jul 18 1982 4:59 am
Email: Steven@sri-unix
Groups: net.micro
Does anyone know if I can get a modification for an Epson MX-80F/T so that I can use the full 128 ASCII character set, rather than the 96 ASCII character set supplied by Epson? I would like to use the epson for term papers, and my teachers frown on all-caps...
Thanx a bunch,
=Steve=
posted by ?! at 6:18 AM on October 22, 2006
MOTHERFUCKER! I'M SUPPOSED TO BE ON THE ROAD RIGHT NOW! MOTHERFUCKING LATE SO I COULD KILL TIME ON THE INTERNET, FIND SMALL PARTICIPATION IN CAPS LOCK DAY. DON'T FORGET TO BRING THIS TO TEXT MESSAGES AND OBNOXIATE ALL YOUR FRIENDS! FUCK YEAH!
posted by DyRE at 7:14 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by DyRE at 7:14 AM on October 22, 2006
DYRE IS AN PENGUIN.
posted by loquacious at 7:36 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by loquacious at 7:36 AM on October 22, 2006
WISH I COULD SLIP THOSE SHORTS OFF YOU, BUT I HAVE TO GO VOTE NOW.
posted by wfc123 at 7:49 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by wfc123 at 7:49 AM on October 22, 2006
THIS THREAD GAVE ME EPILEPSY AND TYPE 2 DIABETES.
posted by jimmythefish at 8:03 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by jimmythefish at 8:03 AM on October 22, 2006
RHOMBOID THATS TOTALLY WRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!
posted by arcticwoman at 8:04 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by arcticwoman at 8:04 AM on October 22, 2006
SEXUAL HARASSMENT CORNBRATOR HYPER WANK DEVICE ENGRISH
posted by Rhomboid at 8:08 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by Rhomboid at 8:08 AM on October 22, 2006
I just got a voicemail from fark.com. They want their farkiness back.
KTHXBI
posted by andreaazure at 8:18 AM on October 22, 2006
KTHXBI
posted by andreaazure at 8:18 AM on October 22, 2006
FIRST COMMENT1!!! SUCK IT TEN PERCENTERS!!!
posted by war wrath of wraith at 8:32 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by war wrath of wraith at 8:32 AM on October 22, 2006
YO! I WENT UP TO THIS THUG GANSTER AND HE WAS LIKE 'YO MOTHERFUCKER!'
WEEEEEEEEEE!
posted by quin at 8:50 AM on October 22, 2006
WEEEEEEEEEE!
posted by quin at 8:50 AM on October 22, 2006
HI,
CAN YOU PLEASE TELL ME HOW TO SET UP MY WEB-BASED INTERNET? I WILL BE TRAVELLING THIS MONTH AND I WILL NEED IT TO ACCESS MY EMAILS. PLEASE TELL ME ASAP HOW TO SET IT UP.
THANKS,
(STFU)
posted by empatterson at 9:06 AM on October 22, 2006
I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR THE WORLD BEING A STRANGE PLACE.
posted by squidfartz at 9:27 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by squidfartz at 9:28 AM on October 22, 2006
THERE ARE CATS IN THIS THREAD SO IT MUST BE FUN.
posted by darkripper at 9:34 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by darkripper at 9:34 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by pyramid termite at 9:38 AM on October 22, 2006
CATS ARE LURKING ON METAFILTER
posted by pyramid termite at 9:41 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by pyramid termite at 9:41 AM on October 22, 2006
international caps-lock day is still not recognized in utah
posted by mr_crash_davis at 9:46 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by mr_crash_davis at 9:46 AM on October 22, 2006
hooray for ...
NO WAIT, I FUCKED IT UP
SORRY
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 9:47 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 9:48 AM on October 22, 2006
IF I CAN'T POST PICTURES, I'M GOING TO POST WORSER STUFF!!!
It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents, except at
occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which
swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling
along the house-tops, and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the
lamps that struggled against the darkness. Through one of the obscurest
quarters of London, and among haunts little loved by the gentlemen of the
police, a man, evidently of the lowest orders, was wending his solitary
way. He stopped twice or thrice at different shops and houses of a
description correspondent with the appearance of the quartier in which
they were situated, and tended inquiry for some article or another which
did not seem easily to be met with. All the answers he received were
couched in the negative; and as he turned from each door he muttered to
himself, in no very elegant phraseology, his disappointment and
discontent. At length, at one house, the landlord, a sturdy butcher,
after rendering the same reply the inquirer had hitherto received, added,
"But if this vill do as vell, Dummie, it is quite at your sarvice!"
Pausing reflectively for a moment, Dummie responded that he thought the
thing proffered might do as well; and thrusting it into his ample pocket,
he strode away with as rapid a motion as the wind and the rain would
allow. He soon came to a nest of low and dingy buildings, at the
entrance to which, in half-effaced characters, was written "Thames
Court." Halting at the most conspicuous of these buildings, an inn or
alehouse, through the half-closed windows of which blazed out in ruddy
comfort the beams of the hospitable hearth, he knocked hastily at the
door. He was admitted by a lady of a certain age, and endowed with a
comely rotundity of face and person.
"Hast got it, Dummie?" said she, quickly, as she closed the door on the
guest.
"Noa, noa! not exactly; but I thinks as 'ow--"
"Pish, you fool!" cried the woman, interrupting him peevishly. "Vy, it
is no use desaving me. You knows you has only stepped from my
boosing-ken to another, and you has not been arter the book at all. So
there's the poor cretur a raving and a dying, and you--"
"Let I speak!" interrupted Dummie in his turn. "I tells you I vent first
to Mother Bussblone's, who, I knows, chops the whiners morning and
evening to the young ladies, and I axes there for a Bible; and she says,
says she, 'I' as only a "Companion to the Halter," but you'll get a
Bible, I think, at Master Talkins', the cobbler as preaches.' So I goes
to Master Talkins, and he says, says he, 'I 'as no call for the
Bible,--'cause vy? I 'as a call vithout; but mayhap you'll be a getting
it at the butcher's hover the vay,--'cause vy? The butcher 'll be
damned!' So I goes hover the vay, and the butcher says, says he, 'I 'as
not a Bible, but I 'as a book of plays bound for all the vorld just like
'un, and mayhap the poor cretur may n't see the difference.' So I takes
the plays, Mrs. Margery, and here they be surely! And how's poor Judy?"
"Fearsome! she'll not be over the night, I'm a thinking."
"Vell, I'll track up the dancers!"
posted by pyramid termite at 9:54 AM on October 22, 2006
It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents, except at
occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which
swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling
along the house-tops, and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the
lamps that struggled against the darkness. Through one of the obscurest
quarters of London, and among haunts little loved by the gentlemen of the
police, a man, evidently of the lowest orders, was wending his solitary
way. He stopped twice or thrice at different shops and houses of a
description correspondent with the appearance of the quartier in which
they were situated, and tended inquiry for some article or another which
did not seem easily to be met with. All the answers he received were
couched in the negative; and as he turned from each door he muttered to
himself, in no very elegant phraseology, his disappointment and
discontent. At length, at one house, the landlord, a sturdy butcher,
after rendering the same reply the inquirer had hitherto received, added,
"But if this vill do as vell, Dummie, it is quite at your sarvice!"
Pausing reflectively for a moment, Dummie responded that he thought the
thing proffered might do as well; and thrusting it into his ample pocket,
he strode away with as rapid a motion as the wind and the rain would
allow. He soon came to a nest of low and dingy buildings, at the
entrance to which, in half-effaced characters, was written "Thames
Court." Halting at the most conspicuous of these buildings, an inn or
alehouse, through the half-closed windows of which blazed out in ruddy
comfort the beams of the hospitable hearth, he knocked hastily at the
door. He was admitted by a lady of a certain age, and endowed with a
comely rotundity of face and person.
"Hast got it, Dummie?" said she, quickly, as she closed the door on the
guest.
"Noa, noa! not exactly; but I thinks as 'ow--"
"Pish, you fool!" cried the woman, interrupting him peevishly. "Vy, it
is no use desaving me. You knows you has only stepped from my
boosing-ken to another, and you has not been arter the book at all. So
there's the poor cretur a raving and a dying, and you--"
"Let I speak!" interrupted Dummie in his turn. "I tells you I vent first
to Mother Bussblone's, who, I knows, chops the whiners morning and
evening to the young ladies, and I axes there for a Bible; and she says,
says she, 'I' as only a "Companion to the Halter," but you'll get a
Bible, I think, at Master Talkins', the cobbler as preaches.' So I goes
to Master Talkins, and he says, says he, 'I 'as no call for the
Bible,--'cause vy? I 'as a call vithout; but mayhap you'll be a getting
it at the butcher's hover the vay,--'cause vy? The butcher 'll be
damned!' So I goes hover the vay, and the butcher says, says he, 'I 'as
not a Bible, but I 'as a book of plays bound for all the vorld just like
'un, and mayhap the poor cretur may n't see the difference.' So I takes
the plays, Mrs. Margery, and here they be surely! And how's poor Judy?"
"Fearsome! she'll not be over the night, I'm a thinking."
"Vell, I'll track up the dancers!"
posted by pyramid termite at 9:54 AM on October 22, 2006
CATS ARE LURKING ON METAFILTER
OMG YOU ARE RIGHT.
posted by darkripper at 10:00 AM on October 22, 2006
OMG YOU ARE RIGHT.
posted by darkripper at 10:00 AM on October 22, 2006
MY EYES HURT FROM THIS THREAD, SO I MAKE IT STOP NOW
posted by lalochezia at 10:01 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by lalochezia at 10:01 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by lalochezia at 10:02 AM on October 22, 2006
OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE I READ THROUGH ALL THAT JUST TO GET DOWN HERE AND TYPE IN CAPS I WISH I HAD THAT 10 MINUTES OF MY LIEF BACK!!!!!112
posted by Demogorgon at 10:09 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by Demogorgon at 10:09 AM on October 22, 2006
MERRY CRAPS LORCK DAY!!!!~!!!!@121!!!
posted by A dead Quaker at 10:14 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by A dead Quaker at 10:14 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by poweredbybeard at 10:15 AM on October 22, 2006
FEAR NO MAN!
I'll make you a MASTER of CAPS LOCK ... the Secret Welsh ART of SELF DEFENCE that requires NO INTELLIGENCE, STRENGTH or PHYSICAL courage.
The FANTASTIC SECRETS of the SECRET world-famous method of SELF DEFENCE, kept secret for centuries because of their DEADLY POWER to MAIM, KILL, SMASH, BATTER, FRACTURE, CRUSH, DISMEMBER, CRACK, DISEMBOWEL, CRIPPLE, SNAP and HARM are now revealed to YOU in the English Language by a CAPS LOCK master AT HIS OWN RISK, PROVIDED you promise to MAIM, CRUSH, DISEMBOWEL and so on ONLY in SELF DEFENCE. (This is just to cover ourselves, as you will understand.)
WHY "At his own risk?"
BECAUSE if his fellow masters of CAPS LOCK DISCOVER his IDENTITY, they will PUNISH HIM SEVERELY for revealing the DEADLY secrets he had promised to keep SECRET, without giving them a piece of the ACTION, and also BECAUSE of the TERRIBLE risk of PUNISHMENT he runs under the Trades Description Act.
WHAT is CAPS LOCK?
IT is THE most DEADLY form OF SECRET self-DEFENCE that HAS ever been widely advertised and available to EVERYONE.
WHY ALL the CAPITALS?
Because THE most likely kind OF person TO answer THIS sort OF advertisement HAS less trouble under-STANDING words if they ARE written in BIG letters.
WHAT is CAPS LOCK again?
It is an ANCIENT Welsh ART based on a BRILLIANTLY simple I-D-E-A, which is a SECRET. The best form of DEFENCE is ATTACK (Clausewitz) and the most VITAL element of ATTACK is SURPRISE (Oscar HAMMERstein). Therefore, the BEST way to protect yourself AGAINST any ASSAILANT is to ATTACK him before he attacks YOU... Or BETTER... BEFORE the THOUGHT of doing so has EVEN OCCURRED TO HIM!!! SO YOU MAY BE ABLE TO RENDER YOUR ASSAILANT UNCONSCIOUS BEFORE he is EVEN aware of your very existence!
No longer need you feel WEAK, helpless, INDECISIVE, NOT fascinating and ASHAMED of your genital dimensions. No more need you be out-manoeuvred in political debate!! GOOD BYE HUMILIATION, wisecracking bullies, Karate experts, boxing champions, sarcastic vicars, traffic wardens; entire panzer divisions will melt to pulp as you master every situation without INADEQUACY. PROTECT YOUR LOVED ONES. You will no longer look pitiful and spotty to your GIRL FRIENDS when you leave some unsuspecting passer-by looking like four tins of cat food! They will admire your MASTERY and DECISIVENESS and LACK OF INADEQUACY and will almost certainly let you put your HAND inside their BLOUSE out of sheer ADMIRATION. And after seeing more of your expert disabling they'll almost definitely go to bed with you, although obviously we can't ABSOLUTELY guarantee this, still it's extremely likely and would make learning CAPS LOCK really worthwhile although legally we can't PROMISE anything.
Why WELSH Art?
CAPS LOCK was developed in Wales because for the average Welshman, the best prospects of achieving a reasonable standard of living lie with the acquisition of the most efficient techniques of armed robbery.
HOW do I learn?
No, you mean "How do You Learn". I know already.
HOW do You Learn?
You receive ABSOLUTELY FREE your own special personal CAPS LOCK Picture Book with hundreds of PHOTOGRAPHS and just a very few plain, clear and simple, easy to understand words.
Only a FOUR-SECOND WORK-OUT Each Day!
And you will be ready to HARM people!
* DEVELOP UP TO 38" BICEPS
* GROW UP TO 12" TALLER
* LOSE UP TO 40" OF FAT IN YOUR FIRST WORK-OUT!
* PROLONG YOUR LIFE BY UP TO 1,000 YEARS
* GO TO BED WITH UP TO ANY LUDICROUS NUMBER OF GIRLS YOU CARE TO THINK OF PROVIDING YOU REALIZE THIS STATEMENT IS QUITE MEANINGLESS AS THE PHRASE "UP TO" CLEARLY INCLUDES THE NUMBER "NOUGHT".
WHAT Does it Cost?
This, like CAPS LOCK, is a SECRET but you will find out sooner or later, don't worry.
FILL IN DARING HAIR-RAISING MONEY-SAVING HALF-PRICE NO-RISK FREE-TRIAL FORM NOW!
O.K. Honourable Master, I accept your daring, hair-raising, mind-boggling, blood-curdling, no-risk, half-price, free-trial offer to reveal the secrets of CAPS LOCK in a plain wrapper at once. Yes Master, I never again want to be 'Weak In The Knees' and 'Chicken Out' and 'Wet My Pants' when insulted and attacked.
I agree never to abuse the principles of CAPS LOCK or consult a lawyer.
I am over 4.
I have an extra Y chromosome.
Bill me later. I understand that if I am not completely satisfied I have been had.
Name:
Age:
Address:
Please also enroll me under your special Car Insurance Scheme. I understand that I do not have to sign anything to make this completely binding to me.
posted by poweredbybeard at 10:26 AM on October 22, 2006 [1 favorite]
I'll make you a MASTER of CAPS LOCK ... the Secret Welsh ART of SELF DEFENCE that requires NO INTELLIGENCE, STRENGTH or PHYSICAL courage.
The FANTASTIC SECRETS of the SECRET world-famous method of SELF DEFENCE, kept secret for centuries because of their DEADLY POWER to MAIM, KILL, SMASH, BATTER, FRACTURE, CRUSH, DISMEMBER, CRACK, DISEMBOWEL, CRIPPLE, SNAP and HARM are now revealed to YOU in the English Language by a CAPS LOCK master AT HIS OWN RISK, PROVIDED you promise to MAIM, CRUSH, DISEMBOWEL and so on ONLY in SELF DEFENCE. (This is just to cover ourselves, as you will understand.)
WHY "At his own risk?"
BECAUSE if his fellow masters of CAPS LOCK DISCOVER his IDENTITY, they will PUNISH HIM SEVERELY for revealing the DEADLY secrets he had promised to keep SECRET, without giving them a piece of the ACTION, and also BECAUSE of the TERRIBLE risk of PUNISHMENT he runs under the Trades Description Act.
WHAT is CAPS LOCK?
IT is THE most DEADLY form OF SECRET self-DEFENCE that HAS ever been widely advertised and available to EVERYONE.
WHY ALL the CAPITALS?
Because THE most likely kind OF person TO answer THIS sort OF advertisement HAS less trouble under-STANDING words if they ARE written in BIG letters.
WHAT is CAPS LOCK again?
It is an ANCIENT Welsh ART based on a BRILLIANTLY simple I-D-E-A, which is a SECRET. The best form of DEFENCE is ATTACK (Clausewitz) and the most VITAL element of ATTACK is SURPRISE (Oscar HAMMERstein). Therefore, the BEST way to protect yourself AGAINST any ASSAILANT is to ATTACK him before he attacks YOU... Or BETTER... BEFORE the THOUGHT of doing so has EVEN OCCURRED TO HIM!!! SO YOU MAY BE ABLE TO RENDER YOUR ASSAILANT UNCONSCIOUS BEFORE he is EVEN aware of your very existence!
No longer need you feel WEAK, helpless, INDECISIVE, NOT fascinating and ASHAMED of your genital dimensions. No more need you be out-manoeuvred in political debate!! GOOD BYE HUMILIATION, wisecracking bullies, Karate experts, boxing champions, sarcastic vicars, traffic wardens; entire panzer divisions will melt to pulp as you master every situation without INADEQUACY. PROTECT YOUR LOVED ONES. You will no longer look pitiful and spotty to your GIRL FRIENDS when you leave some unsuspecting passer-by looking like four tins of cat food! They will admire your MASTERY and DECISIVENESS and LACK OF INADEQUACY and will almost certainly let you put your HAND inside their BLOUSE out of sheer ADMIRATION. And after seeing more of your expert disabling they'll almost definitely go to bed with you, although obviously we can't ABSOLUTELY guarantee this, still it's extremely likely and would make learning CAPS LOCK really worthwhile although legally we can't PROMISE anything.
Why WELSH Art?
CAPS LOCK was developed in Wales because for the average Welshman, the best prospects of achieving a reasonable standard of living lie with the acquisition of the most efficient techniques of armed robbery.
HOW do I learn?
No, you mean "How do You Learn". I know already.
HOW do You Learn?
You receive ABSOLUTELY FREE your own special personal CAPS LOCK Picture Book with hundreds of PHOTOGRAPHS and just a very few plain, clear and simple, easy to understand words.
Only a FOUR-SECOND WORK-OUT Each Day!
And you will be ready to HARM people!
* DEVELOP UP TO 38" BICEPS
* GROW UP TO 12" TALLER
* LOSE UP TO 40" OF FAT IN YOUR FIRST WORK-OUT!
* PROLONG YOUR LIFE BY UP TO 1,000 YEARS
* GO TO BED WITH UP TO ANY LUDICROUS NUMBER OF GIRLS YOU CARE TO THINK OF PROVIDING YOU REALIZE THIS STATEMENT IS QUITE MEANINGLESS AS THE PHRASE "UP TO" CLEARLY INCLUDES THE NUMBER "NOUGHT".
WHAT Does it Cost?
This, like CAPS LOCK, is a SECRET but you will find out sooner or later, don't worry.
FILL IN DARING HAIR-RAISING MONEY-SAVING HALF-PRICE NO-RISK FREE-TRIAL FORM NOW!
O.K. Honourable Master, I accept your daring, hair-raising, mind-boggling, blood-curdling, no-risk, half-price, free-trial offer to reveal the secrets of CAPS LOCK in a plain wrapper at once. Yes Master, I never again want to be 'Weak In The Knees' and 'Chicken Out' and 'Wet My Pants' when insulted and attacked.
I agree never to abuse the principles of CAPS LOCK or consult a lawyer.
I am over 4.
I have an extra Y chromosome.
Bill me later. I understand that if I am not completely satisfied I have been had.
Name:
Age:
Address:
Please also enroll me under your special Car Insurance Scheme. I understand that I do not have to sign anything to make this completely binding to me.
posted by poweredbybeard at 10:26 AM on October 22, 2006 [1 favorite]
I JUST WOKE UP AND MISSED THE FIRST TWELEVE HRS OF CAPSLOCKDAY!!!! HOW WILL I BE ABL ETO MAKE IT UP!!! HELP ME SOMEONE! !! I HD A GOOD DREAM THO WHERE I WAS IN A BIG HOTEL BUT IT WAS FULL OF NICE HIGHS CHOOL SENIORS WHO DIDN'T STEAL MY STUFFS, WHICH WAS AWSUM! ALSO I WAS ABLE TO SKATEBOARD AND DID A DOUBLE RAIL GRIND ON RALROAD TRAKS!!! BUT MY BROTHER DID NOT SEE WHICH MADE ME SAD THEN I HAD TO CATC A PLANE BUT MY FAMILE WAS NOT RDY AND WE WERE GOING TO MISS OUR FLIGHT!!!!!!!! THEN I WOKE UP AND IT WAS CAPS LOCK DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HORRAY!!!!!! LAMO!
posted by tittergrrl at 10:28 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by tittergrrl at 10:28 AM on October 22, 2006
On the Nth day of Christmas, my true love said to me: SHAVE YOUR BALLS PAEDO-BRAIN AND RUB MY CUM SAC LID
posted by snoktruix at 10:30 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by snoktruix at 10:30 AM on October 22, 2006
I MEAN I WOKE UP IN RL, NOT DREAMING LIFE WHICH WOULD HAV EBEEN COOL! BUT IT WAS RL! \ (o) (o) / ROTLF IC AN'T DO THOSE THINGS
posted by tittergrrl at 10:30 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by tittergrrl at 10:30 AM on October 22, 2006
IMG TAGS HAVE BEEN TURNED OFF DUE TO POOR SITE CODING.
posted by quonsar at 10:59 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by quonsar at 10:59 AM on October 22, 2006
well thats no fun. late for the party again. *slinks home*
posted by nola at 11:01 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by nola at 11:01 AM on October 22, 2006
WHAT SAY YOU AND ME CUT ON OUT OF THIS PLACE AND COMPARE CAPSLOCK KEYS AT MY PAD?
posted by quonsar at 11:06 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by quonsar at 11:06 AM on October 22, 2006
FIRST POST!
posted by poweredbybeard at 11:10 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by poweredbybeard at 11:10 AM on October 22, 2006
FUCK A BUNCH OF IMAGES I HAVE BOLD CAPS LOCK ALSO A BONER AND IT HURTS WHEN I SIT DOWN [FROM ALL THE WIPING MY ASS]. DID I MENTION MY CRIPPLING MENTAL PROBLEMS?
I AM PRETTY SURE I DID LOL.
PROTIP: TURN OFF CAPS LOCK TO BE SOME SORT OF ASSHOLE TODAY
posted by phylum sinter at 11:16 AM on October 22, 2006
I AM PRETTY SURE I DID LOL.
PROTIP: TURN OFF CAPS LOCK TO BE SOME SORT OF ASSHOLE TODAY
posted by phylum sinter at 11:16 AM on October 22, 2006
NO MAN IS PATR OF AN ISLEAND
EVERYMAN ITH A MATHACRE
THERE BE NO DROMODAIRY IN THE PORCH
DOES THOU ABUT?
THOU ABUTEST.
DO NOT QUESTION THE ABUTING
IF THE PART OF THE THING IS THERE THEN IT IS AND IT SHALL NOT BE QUESTIONED
posted by Football Bat at 11:20 AM on October 22, 2006
EVERYMAN ITH A MATHACRE
THERE BE NO DROMODAIRY IN THE PORCH
DOES THOU ABUT?
THOU ABUTEST.
DO NOT QUESTION THE ABUTING
IF THE PART OF THE THING IS THERE THEN IT IS AND IT SHALL NOT BE QUESTIONED
posted by Football Bat at 11:20 AM on October 22, 2006
AN... AN... AN I WOK UP AND LOQUQACIOUS WAS THERE AND HE WAS DOUBLE-SHORN AND HE SAID HE SAID HE SAID OW JAYSIS IT WAS IMPORTANT
posted by Football Bat at 11:23 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by Football Bat at 11:23 AM on October 22, 2006
MEATY HAT FOOTBAL BAT CUNTRY HUMPTY HAMPSTER FISH PANTS DANCE DANCE FIANAL SOLUTION LOTION OR ITS GET TEH HOSE AGIN
posted by loquacious at 11:35 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by loquacious at 11:35 AM on October 22, 2006
SWEET JESUS IT'S GOING TO GO CRITICAL SOON RUUUNNNNNNN
posted by Rhomboid at 11:42 AM on October 22, 2006
posted by Rhomboid at 11:42 AM on October 22, 2006
FIRST POST!
posted by poweredbybeard at 12:01 PM on October 22, 2006
posted by poweredbybeard at 12:01 PM on October 22, 2006
JOSIAH SHRUGGED
posted by Dreamghost at 12:15 PM on October 22, 2006
posted by Dreamghost at 12:15 PM on October 22, 2006
IMG SRC="HTTP://GIVE.ME.BACK.MY.IMG.TAG.,HATERS.PNG"
posted by poweredbybeard at 12:20 PM on October 22, 2006
posted by poweredbybeard at 12:20 PM on October 22, 2006
LET ME SEE...
....
ALAS, POOR YORICK!
I KNEW HIM, HORATIO: A FELLOW OF INFINITE JEST, OF MOST EXCELLENT FANCY: HE HATH BORNE ME ON HIS BACK A THOUSAND TIMES; AND NOW, HOW ABHORRED IN MY IMAGINATION IT IS! MY GORGE RIMS AT IT. HERE HUNG THOSE LIPS THAT I HAVE KISSED I KNOW NOT HOW OFT.
WHERE BE YOUR GIBES NOW? YOUR GAMBOLS? YOUR SONGS? YOUR FLASHES OF MERRIMENT, THAT WERE WONT TO SET THE TABLE ON A ROAR? NOT ONE NOW, TO MOCK YOUR OWN GRINNING? QUITE CHAP-FALLEN?
posted by sparkletone at 12:22 PM on October 22, 2006
....
ALAS, POOR YORICK!
I KNEW HIM, HORATIO: A FELLOW OF INFINITE JEST, OF MOST EXCELLENT FANCY: HE HATH BORNE ME ON HIS BACK A THOUSAND TIMES; AND NOW, HOW ABHORRED IN MY IMAGINATION IT IS! MY GORGE RIMS AT IT. HERE HUNG THOSE LIPS THAT I HAVE KISSED I KNOW NOT HOW OFT.
WHERE BE YOUR GIBES NOW? YOUR GAMBOLS? YOUR SONGS? YOUR FLASHES OF MERRIMENT, THAT WERE WONT TO SET THE TABLE ON A ROAR? NOT ONE NOW, TO MOCK YOUR OWN GRINNING? QUITE CHAP-FALLEN?
posted by sparkletone at 12:22 PM on October 22, 2006
ITS NOT FOUR SALE
posted by Steve_at_Linnwood at 12:35 PM on October 22, 2006
posted by Steve_at_Linnwood at 12:35 PM on October 22, 2006
3 jillion posts, and nobody has said
I'M IN UR KEYRBAOD, LOKKEN UR CAPS!
yet. I'm disappointed in you lot.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 1:40 PM on October 22, 2006
I'M IN UR KEYRBAOD, LOKKEN UR CAPS!
yet. I'm disappointed in you lot.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 1:40 PM on October 22, 2006
6 YEARS OF IMG TAGS AND NOTHING BAD HAPPENED. ONE DAY SOME CLOWN AUTOMATICALLY FAVORITES HIS OWN COMMENT AND MATHOWIE ACTS LIKE GEORGE BUSH AFTER BUILDINGS FALL IN MANHATTAN. MEANWHILE THE REST OF THE FORUM WORLD GOES ON ENJOYING THIER IMG TAGS WITHOUT SUCCUMBING TO TREMBLING FEAR AND CURTAILMENT OF FREEDOMS.
I'M IN UR MEFI FORUM DRAINING YER BANK ACCOUNTS BITCHIZ!
I'M IN UR MEFI FORUM DRAINING YER BANK ACCOUNTS BITCHIZ!
I'M IN UR MEFI FORUM DRAINING YER BANK ACCOUNTS BITCHIZ!
I'M IN UR MEFI FORUM DRAINING YER BANK ACCOUNTS BITCHIZ!
I'M IN UR MEFI FORUM DRAINING YER BANK ACCOUNTS BITCHIZ!
posted by quonsar at 2:18 PM on October 22, 2006
I'M IN UR MEFI FORUM DRAINING YER BANK ACCOUNTS BITCHIZ!
I'M IN UR MEFI FORUM DRAINING YER BANK ACCOUNTS BITCHIZ!
I'M IN UR MEFI FORUM DRAINING YER BANK ACCOUNTS BITCHIZ!
I'M IN UR MEFI FORUM DRAINING YER BANK ACCOUNTS BITCHIZ!
I'M IN UR MEFI FORUM DRAINING YER BANK ACCOUNTS BITCHIZ!
posted by quonsar at 2:18 PM on October 22, 2006
3 jillion posts, and nobody has said
I'M IN UR KEYRBAOD, LOKKEN UR CAPS!
yet. I'm disappointed in you lot.
DUDE. YOU TOTALLY JUST SAID IT! WE WERE WAITING FOR YOU TO DO IT!
PS: ADAMA MANEUVER!
posted by sparkletone at 2:19 PM on October 22, 2006
I'M IN UR KEYRBAOD, LOKKEN UR CAPS!
yet. I'm disappointed in you lot.
DUDE. YOU TOTALLY JUST SAID IT! WE WERE WAITING FOR YOU TO DO IT!
PS: ADAMA MANEUVER!
posted by sparkletone at 2:19 PM on October 22, 2006
WHEN I BE A-ROKKEN, DON'T COME A-KNOKKEN. TODD LOKKEN.
posted by poweredbybeard at 2:31 PM on October 22, 2006
posted by poweredbybeard at 2:31 PM on October 22, 2006
CAPS LOCK DAY WITHOUT THE IMG SRC TAG IS EXACTLY LIKE A NEW ORLEANS JAZZ FUNERAL IN THE WAKE OF KATRINA IN EVERY CONCEIVABLE WAY WITH NO SIGNIFICANT DIFFERENCE WHATSOEVER
posted by Sticherbeast at 2:54 PM on October 22, 2006
posted by Sticherbeast at 2:54 PM on October 22, 2006
NIGGA PUT A CAP IN MY LOCK
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 3:20 PM on October 22, 2006
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 3:20 PM on October 22, 2006
IS IT TOO LATE FOR ME TO JOIN I WISH TO HAVE FUN WITH EVERYONE
posted by brain_drain at 6:03 PM on October 22, 2006
posted by brain_drain at 6:03 PM on October 22, 2006
THE POWER OF HASSELHOFF COMPELS YOU!!!!!
THE POWER OF HASSELHOFF COMPELS YOU!!!!!
THE POWER OF HASSELHOFF COMPELS YOU!!!!!
posted by NationalKato at 6:18 PM on October 22, 2006
THE POWER OF HASSELHOFF COMPELS YOU!!!!!
THE POWER OF HASSELHOFF COMPELS YOU!!!!!
posted by NationalKato at 6:18 PM on October 22, 2006
I HEART CAPS LORK DAY!!!
posted by eyeballkid at 6:19 PM on October 22, 2006 [1 favorite]
posted by eyeballkid at 6:19 PM on October 22, 2006 [1 favorite]
I ALSO CAPITALIZE MY "EM" TAGS
CAPZ 4 LIFE, YO
posted by poweredbybeard at 6:21 PM on October 22, 2006
CAPZ 4 LIFE, YO
posted by poweredbybeard at 6:21 PM on October 22, 2006
NOTHING LIKE SALMON FOR TOAST ON CAPS LOCK DAY HOW BOUT THEM RAIDERS AM I RITE
posted by eddydamascene at 6:32 PM on October 22, 2006
posted by eddydamascene at 6:32 PM on October 22, 2006
APPLY DIRECTLY TO FOREHEAD!
APPLY DIRECTLY TO FOREHEAD!
APPLY DIRECTLY TO FOREHEAD!
posted by ninjew at 7:01 PM on October 22, 2006
APPLY DIRECTLY TO FOREHEAD!
APPLY DIRECTLY TO FOREHEAD!
posted by ninjew at 7:01 PM on October 22, 2006
OH NOSE THIS THREAD TURNED MEFI INTO 4CHAN
YOU DO NOT TALK ABOUT 4CHAN :D
posted by zenzizi at 7:15 PM on October 22, 2006
YOU DO NOT TALK ABOUT 4CHAN :D
posted by zenzizi at 7:15 PM on October 22, 2006
I'VE GOT A LITTLE OVER AN HOUR OF CAPSLOCK DAY LEFT. IF THIS WERE A PARTY, AND IT IS, THERE'D BE AT LEAST ONE DRUNK GUY WANDERING AROUND TELLING EVERYONE HE LOVES THEM. IN THAT SPIRIT, I SAY TO YOU ALL:
I LUV U GUYZ. NO RLY. I LUV. FROM MY HEART.
posted by sparkletone at 7:50 PM on October 22, 2006
I LUV U GUYZ. NO RLY. I LUV. FROM MY HEART.
posted by sparkletone at 7:50 PM on October 22, 2006
YR DOING IT WRONG DIAF
posted by loquacious at 7:52 PM on October 22, 2006
posted by loquacious at 7:52 PM on October 22, 2006
FAILGET
posted by loquacious at 7:54 PM on October 22, 2006
posted by loquacious at 7:54 PM on October 22, 2006
FOR ONCE I'M NOT TOO LATE!!!!!!!! OH HAPPY HAPPY CAPS LOCK DAY TO ME TO ME TO MEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
posted by puddinghead at 7:59 PM on October 22, 2006
posted by puddinghead at 7:59 PM on October 22, 2006
LOQUACIOUS THEY KILLED OUR BEAUTIFUL LARGE BLINKING FIGLET BANNERS CRAFTED OF PURE U+2593 AND U+2591 STOP WILL BE HOLDING A MEMORIAL FOR UNICODE BANNERS STOP EXPECT TO SEE QUONSARS PANTSFISH IN ATTENDANCE STOP
posted by Rhomboid at 8:34 PM on October 22, 2006
posted by Rhomboid at 8:34 PM on October 22, 2006
YR DOING IT WRONG DIAF
:( I AM NOT :(
DO NOT RUIN THE END OF A BEAUTIFUL DAY FOR ME.
posted by sparkletone at 8:36 PM on October 22, 2006
:( I AM NOT :(
DO NOT RUIN THE END OF A BEAUTIFUL DAY FOR ME.
posted by sparkletone at 8:36 PM on October 22, 2006
CAPSLOCK DAY IS ALWAYS TEH FUN.
I LUV U 2, SPARKETONE. LUV, LIKE, FROM A PENIS.
posted by Mach5 at 8:37 PM on October 22, 2006
I LUV U 2, SPARKETONE. LUV, LIKE, FROM A PENIS.
posted by Mach5 at 8:37 PM on October 22, 2006
"I'M GONNA SHARE A VISION THAT I HAD, 'CAUSE I LOVE YOU, AND YOU FEEL IT.
YOU KNOW ALL THAT MONEY WE SPEND ON NUCLEAR WEAPONS AND DEFENSE EACH YEAR? TRILLIONS OF DOLLARS, CORRECT?
INSTEAD -- JUST PLAY WITH THIS -- WHAT IF WE SPENT THAT MONEY FEEDING AND CLOTHING THE POOR OF THE WORLD?
AND IT WOULD PAY FOR IT MANY TIMES OVER, NOT ONE HUMAN BEING EXCLUDED. AND THEN WE COULD EXPLORE SPACE TOGETHER, BOTH INNER AND OUTER, FOREVER, IN PEACE."
SEE YOU ALL NEXT YEAR.
posted by sparkletone at 9:00 PM on October 22, 2006
YOU KNOW ALL THAT MONEY WE SPEND ON NUCLEAR WEAPONS AND DEFENSE EACH YEAR? TRILLIONS OF DOLLARS, CORRECT?
INSTEAD -- JUST PLAY WITH THIS -- WHAT IF WE SPENT THAT MONEY FEEDING AND CLOTHING THE POOR OF THE WORLD?
AND IT WOULD PAY FOR IT MANY TIMES OVER, NOT ONE HUMAN BEING EXCLUDED. AND THEN WE COULD EXPLORE SPACE TOGETHER, BOTH INNER AND OUTER, FOREVER, IN PEACE."
SEE YOU ALL NEXT YEAR.
posted by sparkletone at 9:00 PM on October 22, 2006
GOODBYE UNTIL NEXT YEAR, MY SWEET SWEET CAPS LOCK DAY.
posted by litlnemo at 12:05 AM on October 23, 2006
posted by litlnemo at 12:05 AM on October 23, 2006
I just wanna be long.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 2:34 PM on October 23, 2006
posted by If I Had An Anus at 2:34 PM on October 23, 2006
HA HA IM STILL.....oh wait too late never mind.
posted by wheelieman at 7:08 PM on October 23, 2006
posted by wheelieman at 7:08 PM on October 23, 2006
posted by Eideteker at 12:16 PM on October 24, 2006 [2 favorites]
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posted by Salmonberry at 9:04 PM on October 21, 2006