Seven card bud?

September 14, 2008 12:30 AM

At a casino in Fresno, California, a poker player goes bust. Unwilling to leave the game, he reaches into his pockets for more money, and coming up empty, he seeks to gamble with the only equity he's carrying about his person. He bets the pot. (SLYT)
posted by PeterMcDermott (18 comments total)

Is there a video of a man getting hit in the groin by a football? Cause that would be pretty funny too.
posted by Krrrlson at 12:39 AM on September 14, 2008 [2 favorites]

Not the best way to hash an ante.
posted by Smart Dalek at 12:58 AM on September 14, 2008

Knock yourself out.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 1:00 AM on September 14, 2008

Actually, as I look at the video again, it appears he's playing Blackjack, not poker. But the scope for Blackjack puns is far more limited.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 1:03 AM on September 14, 2008

Q: Why do they call it a roach clip?
A: Because pot holder was taken.
posted by netbros at 1:05 AM on September 14, 2008

Ace High
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 2:25 AM on September 14, 2008

I hate everything about that video. The manufactured news from the two Fox talking heads at KMPH in Fresno, California. The dumb intro claiming most criminals are "out there committing crimes that are dangerous or even deadly." The "news team" choreography that requires one head to hand off the story to the other head, who then looks back at the first head to share a polite prearranged chuckle. The overdramatic ten-second video they use to introduce their "The Force" section, which presumably is their regular arse-licking for the local cops in whom they are embedded. In the intro in the video, "On a downtown Fresno sidewalk, this man is being placed in handcuffs. But he didn't rob a store or assault someone" -- another formulation of the statement that you must be dangerous or they wouldn't arrest you, when most arrests are just for dumb shit like the one shown in this video, possession of marijuana. The cop saying something must have happened or that poor schmuck wouldn't be in handcuffs. Everything about the casino and the people in it. The reporter feeding a line to the casino security guy. The stupid Cannabis Club card and the idiocy of the guy who thought it meant something. The statement that the guy could be in worse trouble because his frazzle-brained move could be construed as distributing -- not that anyone thinks he meant to be dealing, just that, ha ha, we can make it look that way. "On the streets with Fresno law enforcement" instead of "On the streets reporting on Fresno law enforcement." The summary of statistics fed to the the reporters by the police concerning the police department's "Gang Impact Operation," which apparently is a scheme to arrest all of the thugs that everyday life in Fresno creates. The fact that the guy in the casino got three minutes on the news when, supposedly, the reporters were out there with the cops who were making all of those important arrests they summarize in their statistics. Everything. Bleh. Is this post deleted yet?
posted by pracowity at 2:30 AM on September 14, 2008 [16 favorites]

Banal.
posted by batmonkey at 3:31 AM on September 14, 2008

FTFT: "Most of the time criminals are out there committing crimes that are dangerous or even deadly, but once in a while police catch a bad guy doing something, well, victimless."
posted by xchmp at 3:59 AM on September 14, 2008 [1 favorite]

The stupidest part of that whole story is the fact that someone thought it was good enough to put on tv as "news".
posted by robotot at 4:01 AM on September 14, 2008

pracowity, I guess you must really hate this video.
posted by sour cream at 5:09 AM on September 14, 2008

I still don't understand why police insist on treating people like they are five years old when they talk to them? Okay, granted this doesn't happen even a majority of the time, but it damn well happens enough to warrant my question.
"Hi, I'm Mr Morals! You're Mr Dumbass McStupidhead! Explain yourself, Idiot!"

Okay, done with my rant.
posted by P.o.B. at 5:11 AM on September 14, 2008

Because they are, by definition, assholes?
posted by Optamystic at 5:22 AM on September 14, 2008

I still don't understand why police insist on treating people like they are five years old when they talk to them?

In this case, because they understand their role in making "good television."
posted by longsleeves at 5:40 AM on September 14, 2008

I still don't understand why police insist on treating people like they are five years old when they talk to them?

it's to get them to open their mouths and further incriminate themselves
posted by pyramid termite at 5:51 AM on September 14, 2008 [1 favorite]

Yeah, barely on topic but: Gang Impact Operation includes 148 traffic citations? Has the 97th Street Illegal Rite on Redd Krew finally managed to spread over to Fresno, take some territory away from the Phoenix-based Pass a School Bus Bloods?
posted by penduluum at 5:55 AM on September 14, 2008 [1 favorite]

In this case, because they understand their role in making "good television."

But it only "makes good television" because America has a self-righteous, moralistic culture in which a desire to interfere in other people's business and an overwhelming urge to tell other people how they should live is the norm in many quarters.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 6:08 AM on September 14, 2008

Has the 97th Street Illegal Rite on Redd Krew finally managed to spread over to Fresno, take some territory away from the Phoenix-based Pass a School Bus Bloods?

they did, but they all got ran over by the westland mall cell phone drivers posse
posted by pyramid termite at 6:13 AM on September 14, 2008