Hitler is out of gas.
September 22, 2008 11:10 PM Subscribe
So the Southeast is running low on gas. It turns out that Nashville's mayor, who, it seems, looks a lot like Hitler, isn't real happy about that.
This post was deleted for the following reason: This is kind of a lame setup for something we've pretty much done already. -- cortex
Apparently Hitler also isn't real happy about Brett Favre, World of Warcraft, the Dallas Cowboys, Windows Vista, and that somebody stole his car.
posted by lullaby at 11:21 PM on September 22, 2008
posted by lullaby at 11:21 PM on September 22, 2008
You know what else is running out of gas? This post.
posted by mrnutty at 11:21 PM on September 22, 2008 [3 favorites]
posted by mrnutty at 11:21 PM on September 22, 2008 [3 favorites]
You know who else looks a lot like Hitler?
Charlie Chaplin?
posted by hellojed at 11:23 PM on September 22, 2008 [3 favorites]
Charlie Chaplin?
posted by hellojed at 11:23 PM on September 22, 2008 [3 favorites]
You know who else looks a lot like Hitler?
Larry Harvey
posted by mannequito at 11:24 PM on September 22, 2008
Larry Harvey
posted by mannequito at 11:24 PM on September 22, 2008
I might be wrong but I think Hitler getting banned from Xbox Live was the one that started them all.
posted by Ljubljana at 11:28 PM on September 22, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by Ljubljana at 11:28 PM on September 22, 2008 [1 favorite]
That's okay, soon we won't be able to afford any anyway.
Did I mention it was the biggest one day jump ever?
posted by salvia at 11:39 PM on September 22, 2008
Did I mention it was the biggest one day jump ever?
posted by salvia at 11:39 PM on September 22, 2008
I laughed until I stopped. And I mean this as a compliment.
posted by philip-random at 11:54 PM on September 22, 2008
posted by philip-random at 11:54 PM on September 22, 2008
As a final solution, this post goes a long way toward reassuring the reader that Hitler has our best interests at heart. The American way of life is non-negotiable. Never has been, never will be. Now, who's with me for a blitzkrieg? I hear Marietta, Georgia has gas...
posted by wfrgms at 12:02 AM on September 23, 2008
posted by wfrgms at 12:02 AM on September 23, 2008
UKnowForKids: " So the Southeast is running low on gas."
We could always pray for more.
posted by Rhaomi at 12:14 AM on September 23, 2008
We could always pray for more.
posted by Rhaomi at 12:14 AM on September 23, 2008
You know who else looks a lot like Hitler?
Who? Michael Palin?
posted by philip-random at 12:21 AM on September 23, 2008
Who? Michael Palin?
posted by philip-random at 12:21 AM on September 23, 2008
say what you will about hitler, he was never low on gas
posted by pyramid termite at 12:26 AM on September 23, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by pyramid termite at 12:26 AM on September 23, 2008 [1 favorite]
No philip-random, John Cleese. (DON'T MENTION THE WAR)
posted by Pendragon at 12:27 AM on September 23, 2008
posted by Pendragon at 12:27 AM on September 23, 2008
You see. And everyone criticises Nashville's mayor for making that detour into Romania to secure their oil fields before moving his 6th Army towards Stalingrad. They say that without the few weeks delay he would have secured the city before the winter set in. But Nashville needed the gas. And those soldiers would have looked like douchebags on bicycles.
posted by three blind mice at 12:34 AM on September 23, 2008
posted by three blind mice at 12:34 AM on September 23, 2008
Hitler is never funny. OK, except maybe in some Mel Brooks films...
posted by Seekerofsplendor at 12:47 AM on September 23, 2008
posted by Seekerofsplendor at 12:47 AM on September 23, 2008
No philip-random, John Cleese. (DON'T MENTION THE WAR)
I stand corrected. On my way to rehab.
posted by philip-random at 1:04 AM on September 23, 2008
I stand corrected. On my way to rehab.
posted by philip-random at 1:04 AM on September 23, 2008
pyramid termite> say what you will about hitler, he was never low on gas
Wait.... Hitlers crazy flatulence inducing diet was an effort to single umm... handedly.. yes lets go with that... to single handedly solve Nazi Germany's energy shortage? Could this work for us? There are probably a few kinks to be worked out in the collection process before we sink all our money into cabbage futures. Although, perhaps all that's needed is a catchy advertising scheme.... "You can take this oil crisis and blow it out your arse!"
posted by adamt at 2:16 AM on September 23, 2008
Wait.... Hitlers crazy flatulence inducing diet was an effort to single umm... handedly.. yes lets go with that... to single handedly solve Nazi Germany's energy shortage? Could this work for us? There are probably a few kinks to be worked out in the collection process before we sink all our money into cabbage futures. Although, perhaps all that's needed is a catchy advertising scheme.... "You can take this oil crisis and blow it out your arse!"
posted by adamt at 2:16 AM on September 23, 2008
I've never wanted to nuke every post in a thread from space before.
Now I do.
Perfectly legitimate discussion topic that would have resulted in boundless amounts of information about how the gas distribution network sucks or what not ruined by a bunch of wankers because of one throwaway reference to Hitler.
posted by Talez at 3:42 AM on September 23, 2008
Now I do.
Perfectly legitimate discussion topic that would have resulted in boundless amounts of information about how the gas distribution network sucks or what not ruined by a bunch of wankers because of one throwaway reference to Hitler.
posted by Talez at 3:42 AM on September 23, 2008
But they'd look like douchebags on bicycles.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 3:51 AM on September 23, 2008
posted by Kirth Gerson at 3:51 AM on September 23, 2008
because of one throwaway reference to Hitler.
Wait, so one eight-word sentence in the post links to a report about the Southeast's gas shortage, and the following 19-word sentence links to a video which features Hitler (well, a humorous subtitling of a movie about Hitler). I think by sheer verbiage alone, the Hitler reference blitzkriegs the gas shortage reference.
posted by maxwelton at 4:05 AM on September 23, 2008
Wait, so one eight-word sentence in the post links to a report about the Southeast's gas shortage, and the following 19-word sentence links to a video which features Hitler (well, a humorous subtitling of a movie about Hitler). I think by sheer verbiage alone, the Hitler reference blitzkriegs the gas shortage reference.
posted by maxwelton at 4:05 AM on September 23, 2008
Why is it so urgent that these kids get the U.K.?
posted by fullerine at 4:32 AM on September 23, 2008
posted by fullerine at 4:32 AM on September 23, 2008
You know who else looks a lot like Hitler?
Some cats?
posted by Rock Steady at 4:48 AM on September 23, 2008
Some cats?
posted by Rock Steady at 4:48 AM on September 23, 2008
If this gas crisis took place in 2008, and Hitler actually died in 1945, then he was either a highly accurate prophet or a supernatural being, able to understand the suffering of those generations down the line.
posted by mattbucher at 4:57 AM on September 23, 2008
posted by mattbucher at 4:57 AM on September 23, 2008
Perfectly legitimate discussion topic that would have resulted in boundless amounts of information about how the gas distribution network sucks or what not
Not much you need to know to understand this; some hurricanes knocked out the majority of oil production and refinery capacity in the Gulf of Mexico area. There is no strategic reserve of gasoline, and inventories were already low, in part because gasoline prices were low relative to crude oil. Now they're scraping the bottom of the barrel, and we we have a shortage of gasoline for a while. You can easily find boundless amounts of information about it elsewhere on the web. It will probably come back to "normal" within a month or two.
The big jump in the oil price is more difficult to explain, though it was easy enough to predict there would be at least some increase. It was some combination of refineries coming back online and finding they're going to need some more oil to start making up for the shortfall, producers suddenly remembering they were short oil they couldn't deliver this month, and ill-informed trend-following speculators getting caught short as the October futures expired. It had relatively little to do with the government bailout thing. Now we've another month before the next contract expiry, so traders' reactions to general market news become more important again for a bit, and we find out whether the market is collectively capable this time of looking a whole month ahead.
Hitler is funny.
posted by sfenders at 5:04 AM on September 23, 2008
Not much you need to know to understand this; some hurricanes knocked out the majority of oil production and refinery capacity in the Gulf of Mexico area. There is no strategic reserve of gasoline, and inventories were already low, in part because gasoline prices were low relative to crude oil. Now they're scraping the bottom of the barrel, and we we have a shortage of gasoline for a while. You can easily find boundless amounts of information about it elsewhere on the web. It will probably come back to "normal" within a month or two.
The big jump in the oil price is more difficult to explain, though it was easy enough to predict there would be at least some increase. It was some combination of refineries coming back online and finding they're going to need some more oil to start making up for the shortfall, producers suddenly remembering they were short oil they couldn't deliver this month, and ill-informed trend-following speculators getting caught short as the October futures expired. It had relatively little to do with the government bailout thing. Now we've another month before the next contract expiry, so traders' reactions to general market news become more important again for a bit, and we find out whether the market is collectively capable this time of looking a whole month ahead.
Hitler is funny.
posted by sfenders at 5:04 AM on September 23, 2008
I'm chuckling anyway. I don't care what you think.
posted by ThusSpakeZarathustra at 5:11 AM on September 23, 2008
posted by ThusSpakeZarathustra at 5:11 AM on September 23, 2008
The 'anyone who drives a prius...' rant made me laugh but I hadn't seen all the other variations on this before either. Having seen them, it gets old pretty fast.
posted by fatbaq at 5:46 AM on September 23, 2008
posted by fatbaq at 5:46 AM on September 23, 2008
I took some German in college and it is pretty rusty, but I don't think those subtitles are very close at all to what the actors are saying.
posted by TedW at 5:50 AM on September 23, 2008
posted by TedW at 5:50 AM on September 23, 2008
You know who else looks a lot like Hitler?
Himmer is somewhat similar.
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 5:56 AM on September 23, 2008 [1 favorite]
Himmer is somewhat similar.
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 5:56 AM on September 23, 2008 [1 favorite]
South East Asia is runnign out of Oil? oh no.. wait, no its just, yet another USA centric post..
posted by mary8nne at 6:07 AM on September 23, 2008
posted by mary8nne at 6:07 AM on September 23, 2008
If this gas crisis took place in 2008, and Hitler actually died in 1945
2008 for the Clintons is 1943 for Hitler is 2240 for Jesus is 1297 for Buddha. What, are you educated stupid?
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 6:17 AM on September 23, 2008
2008 for the Clintons is 1943 for Hitler is 2240 for Jesus is 1297 for Buddha. What, are you educated stupid?
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 6:17 AM on September 23, 2008
Nashville's mayor, who, it seems, looks a lot like HitlerMayor Karl Dean, Biography.
posted by yz at 6:19 AM on September 23, 2008
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posted by pompomtom at 11:17 PM on September 22, 2008 [1 favorite]