Fathers have given their daughters to monsters before.
March 6, 2015 7:42 AM Subscribe
The Beauty and the Beast. The Children's Stories Made Horrific series at The Toast has always been nightmare fuel, drawing out the horror inherent in many children's stories, but the latest installment might be the most trenchant yet.
Oh man.posted by corb at 7:47 AM on March 6, 2015 [5 favorites]
There's a great sequel to the story in the comments (as a reply to Kate Nepveu, you can also see it here). Comments are a disaster at The Toast, it's impossible to link to them.
posted by jeather at 7:48 AM on March 6, 2015 [5 favorites]
posted by jeather at 7:48 AM on March 6, 2015 [5 favorites]
oh man I hadn't seen the whole series and am reading it now and agh agh agh forever.
posted by corb at 7:54 AM on March 6, 2015
posted by corb at 7:54 AM on March 6, 2015
I love The Toast, and it's so frustrating that my work computer is so hobbled by security settings that 75% of the time the Toast is completely unreadable: as in, the area where the content should be is blank. So annoying.
posted by suelac at 8:09 AM on March 6, 2015
posted by suelac at 8:09 AM on March 6, 2015
(Yeah, I love the content of the Toast but the site often loads terribly in whatever browser I use. I really hope they offer a premium ad-less membership option at some point.)
posted by kmz at 8:11 AM on March 6, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by kmz at 8:11 AM on March 6, 2015 [1 favorite]
Drawing out the horror? Weren't Grimm fairy tales already pretty grim?
posted by jonp72 at 8:21 AM on March 6, 2015
posted by jonp72 at 8:21 AM on March 6, 2015
jonp72: "Drawing out the horror? Weren't Grimm fairy tales already pretty grim?"
Hold your comments for after story time, please.
posted by boo_radley at 8:22 AM on March 6, 2015 [2 favorites]
Hold your comments for after story time, please.
posted by boo_radley at 8:22 AM on March 6, 2015 [2 favorites]
Because of the title of this post, I thought for a moment that was going to be about the Arkansas pol who gave his two adopted daughters to someone else when they didn't work out, and one of the girls was raped by the guy she was given to.
posted by rtha at 8:28 AM on March 6, 2015 [5 favorites]
posted by rtha at 8:28 AM on March 6, 2015 [5 favorites]
Absolutely beautifully written. I can't wait to read the rest of them. Ever thankful to kmz for directing us to these!
posted by Sophie1 at 8:28 AM on March 6, 2015
posted by Sophie1 at 8:28 AM on March 6, 2015
Holy fuck. That is absolutely spot-on for the quiet, understated emotional terrorism of abuse. This is very good and I'm glad kmz made this post, but wow it sure fucked up my lunch break.
posted by a hat out of hell at 8:29 AM on March 6, 2015 [5 favorites]
posted by a hat out of hell at 8:29 AM on March 6, 2015 [5 favorites]
Not all Beasts eat you up in a single night. Some Beasts devour by pieces, and still others make you consume yourself.
Jesus.
posted by kitcat at 8:36 AM on March 6, 2015 [19 favorites]
Jesus.
posted by kitcat at 8:36 AM on March 6, 2015 [19 favorites]
Nice! Chilling. But nice. Up there with my favorite retellings (like the one Tanith Lee did where the Sleeping Beauty tale turned into a poverty stricken mother being forced to prostitute her own child).
posted by WalkerWestridge at 9:03 AM on March 6, 2015
posted by WalkerWestridge at 9:03 AM on March 6, 2015
Oh my, I started to read the Love you Forever one and I had to stop. It almost needs a trigger warning or something.
posted by kitcat at 9:10 AM on March 6, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by kitcat at 9:10 AM on March 6, 2015 [1 favorite]
suelac: I love The Toast, and it's so frustrating that my work computer is so hobbled by security settings
PROTIP: Caching sites, like Archive.org, may serve to help you read webpages, especially when internet filters are in place, though some filters are sharp enough to realize that a blocked website may be re-routed through such sites and block them there, too.
posted by filthy light thief at 9:10 AM on March 6, 2015
PROTIP: Caching sites, like Archive.org, may serve to help you read webpages, especially when internet filters are in place, though some filters are sharp enough to realize that a blocked website may be re-routed through such sites and block them there, too.
posted by filthy light thief at 9:10 AM on March 6, 2015
rtha: Because of the title of this post, I thought for a moment that was going to be about the Arkansas pol who gave his two adopted daughters to someone else ....
From the story: The merchant was loath to part with any of his daughters to this monster, but he loved his own life, and fathers have given their daughters to monsters before.
It's in literature that true life can be found. It's under the mask of fiction that you can tell the truth. ~Gao Xingjian
posted by filthy light thief at 9:18 AM on March 6, 2015 [9 favorites]
From the story: The merchant was loath to part with any of his daughters to this monster, but he loved his own life, and fathers have given their daughters to monsters before.
It's in literature that true life can be found. It's under the mask of fiction that you can tell the truth. ~Gao Xingjian
posted by filthy light thief at 9:18 AM on March 6, 2015 [9 favorites]
I haven't been able to get the line quoted by kitcat out of my head since I read it. The whole thing is full of lines so sharp, you don't feel the bite of the knife until it slides out.
posted by yasaman at 9:21 AM on March 6, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by yasaman at 9:21 AM on March 6, 2015 [2 favorites]
PROTIP: Caching sites, like Archive.org, may serve to help you read webpages, especially when internet filters are in place, though some filters are sharp enough to realize that a blocked website may be re-routed through such sites and block them there, too.
Yeah, nope, archive.org is blocked, too.
I'm spending so much time at MeFi because the site (a) isn't identified as social media, pornography, or file-sharing by our webfilters; (b) actually loads properly on an intentionally-hobbled version of IE based on Office 2007; and (c) actually shows all the comments and lets me post.
I appreciate that when I load MeFi it doesn't give me that condescending message about how my browser is out of date, because I KNOW THAT.
posted by suelac at 9:32 AM on March 6, 2015 [2 favorites]
Yeah, nope, archive.org is blocked, too.
I'm spending so much time at MeFi because the site (a) isn't identified as social media, pornography, or file-sharing by our webfilters; (b) actually loads properly on an intentionally-hobbled version of IE based on Office 2007; and (c) actually shows all the comments and lets me post.
I appreciate that when I load MeFi it doesn't give me that condescending message about how my browser is out of date, because I KNOW THAT.
posted by suelac at 9:32 AM on March 6, 2015 [2 favorites]
Also, oh my god, the Velveteen Rabbit one is fucked up. It fucked me up. Don't read it unless you're prepared to have that story ruined for you FOREVER. It is genuinely super horrifying.
posted by yasaman at 9:35 AM on March 6, 2015 [9 favorites]
posted by yasaman at 9:35 AM on March 6, 2015 [9 favorites]
Her father could not help from crying as he left, but who can cry forever? And who can feel sorry forever? And who will not eventually excuse himself of guilt, if he lives long enough?Huh. Not to get all emo, but this is truly how it feels to watch a parent abandon you in real life, when they leave you to a terrifying situation that they know they don't have to stick around long enough to experience or even try to understand, and you're old enough to know that they know it, too.
Bonus points for reminding me of Rejazz -- Thought I'd cry for you forever / but I couldn't, so I didn't / people's children die and they don't even cry forever...
But in the eyes of this lifelong crouton-petter, the most horrifying one of these stories will always be The Velveteen Rabbit. [shivers]
posted by divined by radio at 9:36 AM on March 6, 2015 [5 favorites]
I feel like it would be nice if some brave soul could tell us which of these stories are safe. I'm with yasaman and divined by radio on the Velveteen Rabbit one. But it was brilliant too, and while I'm scarred for life I don't regret reading it...
posted by kitcat at 9:45 AM on March 6, 2015
posted by kitcat at 9:45 AM on March 6, 2015
And here is where I remind everyone of Bronze by Emily Short. If you like fractured fairy tales, you will like Emily Short's interactive fiction games.
posted by domo at 9:51 AM on March 6, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by domo at 9:51 AM on March 6, 2015 [3 favorites]
Yep, that was amazing, but when I went to the full list and saw The Velveteen Rabbit I just thought that there ain't no way I'm touching that one.
posted by benito.strauss at 10:31 AM on March 6, 2015
posted by benito.strauss at 10:31 AM on March 6, 2015
Also, oh my god, the Velveteen Rabbit one is fucked up. It fucked me up. Don't read it unless you're prepared to have that story ruined for you FOREVER. It is genuinely super horrifying.
IMO, the Velveteen Rabbit is sort of self-ruining. Easily one of the most fucked up kids' books. It wrecked me as a kid.
posted by peep at 10:35 AM on March 6, 2015 [3 favorites]
IMO, the Velveteen Rabbit is sort of self-ruining. Easily one of the most fucked up kids' books. It wrecked me as a kid.
posted by peep at 10:35 AM on March 6, 2015 [3 favorites]
The Velveteen Rabbit one is AWESOME.
posted by capricorn at 10:36 AM on March 6, 2015 [9 favorites]
posted by capricorn at 10:36 AM on March 6, 2015 [9 favorites]
I came across a copy of The Velveteen Rabbit recently. I stood and read it in one go while hanging out in a thrift store. I was amazed it was so dark. The person I was with said, "I think the boy in that dies of yellow fever or something," and I thought, "Nah, not in a kids' book." She wasn't correct, but also wasn't far off enough to bring me any comfort at the end. Holy fuck who would read that to kids? It was like being taught about small pox blankets in US history in grade school. Sure, the world is a fucked up place, but I could have waited until I was older for those stories. Like when I am 60 maybe.
posted by cjorgensen at 11:07 AM on March 6, 2015
posted by cjorgensen at 11:07 AM on March 6, 2015
Just read the Velveteen Rabbit one. Would probably be scary as a child but much less sad than the real story! Minus some of the graphic details, I probably could have handled this one better than the original.
posted by LizBoBiz at 11:08 AM on March 6, 2015
posted by LizBoBiz at 11:08 AM on March 6, 2015
I feel like it would be nice if some brave soul could tell us which of these stories are safe.
Oh! The Places You'll Go Went is, uh, relatively trigger free, although it's always a punch in the gut because HELLO ALL OF MY WORST OVERACHIEVING CHILD/BURNT-OUT YOUNG ADULT INTERNAL DIALOGUE
The Giving Tree and The Little Prince are also kind of more...straight-up body/cosmic horror than traumatic life experience horror.
posted by kagredon at 11:27 AM on March 6, 2015 [2 favorites]
Oh! The Places You
The Giving Tree and The Little Prince are also kind of more...straight-up body/cosmic horror than traumatic life experience horror.
posted by kagredon at 11:27 AM on March 6, 2015 [2 favorites]
The Velveteen Rabbit used to be the only story that could consistently move me to tears. After that, well, I don't know.
I'm trying to remember where I found a version of Beauty and the Beast where Beauty realizes that the Beast will die without her love, marries him, but does not love him, and takes over the castle afterwards. In that one she was kind of magnificently evil. It's almost a complete inversion of this one.
I am now scared to read the rest of these and kind of regret reading the Velveteen Rabbit. I think I should only look at the ones that I don't have deep childhood attachments to.
posted by Hactar at 11:42 AM on March 6, 2015 [3 favorites]
I'm trying to remember where I found a version of Beauty and the Beast where Beauty realizes that the Beast will die without her love, marries him, but does not love him, and takes over the castle afterwards. In that one she was kind of magnificently evil. It's almost a complete inversion of this one.
I am now scared to read the rest of these and kind of regret reading the Velveteen Rabbit. I think I should only look at the ones that I don't have deep childhood attachments to.
posted by Hactar at 11:42 AM on March 6, 2015 [3 favorites]
Also, oh my god, the Velveteen Rabbit one is fucked up.
holy hell.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 1:16 PM on March 6, 2015
holy hell.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 1:16 PM on March 6, 2015
Wow, I love this. Thank you.
posted by small_ruminant at 2:56 PM on March 6, 2015
posted by small_ruminant at 2:56 PM on March 6, 2015
Don't forget the Very Hungry Caterpillar and Are You My Mother?
posted by corb at 3:09 PM on March 6, 2015
posted by corb at 3:09 PM on March 6, 2015
Not all Beasts eat you up in a single night. Some Beasts devour by pieces, and still others make you consume yourself.
Dear gods.
posted by Deoridhe at 3:59 PM on March 6, 2015 [1 favorite]
Dear gods.
posted by Deoridhe at 3:59 PM on March 6, 2015 [1 favorite]
Don't forget the Very Hungry Caterpillar and Are You My Mother?
posted by corb at 6:09 PM on March 6 [+] [!]
Aaaaaaahhhh!
posted by mkim at 5:46 PM on March 6, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by corb at 6:09 PM on March 6 [+] [!]
Aaaaaaahhhh!
posted by mkim at 5:46 PM on March 6, 2015 [1 favorite]
I'm trying to remember where I found a version of Beauty and the Beast where Beauty realizes that the Beast will die without her love, marries him, but does not love him, and takes over the castle afterwards. In that one she was kind of magnificently evil. It's almost a complete inversion of this one.Funny enough, that was also on The Toast.
posted by brett at 9:39 AM on March 7, 2015 [2 favorites]
On review, maybe that's not quite it, since she doesn't technically marry him in that version, but it definitely has the delightfully evil ending.
posted by brett at 9:41 AM on March 7, 2015
posted by brett at 9:41 AM on March 7, 2015
The Little Mermaid Made Horrific. I prefer this version, to be honest.
posted by yasaman at 9:01 PM on March 11, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by yasaman at 9:01 PM on March 11, 2015 [1 favorite]
yasaman: The Little Mermaid Made Horrific. I prefer this version, to be honest.
That's not made horrific: that's made right. The original was horrific enough.
posted by mkim at 4:53 PM on March 13, 2015 [1 favorite]
That's not made horrific: that's made right. The original was horrific enough.
posted by mkim at 4:53 PM on March 13, 2015 [1 favorite]
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