Dockyard in Kent, England searching for chief scorpion wrangler
November 20, 2024 5:42 AM   Subscribe

Dockyard in Kent, England searching for chief scorpion wrangler. The Blue Town Heritage Centre on the Isle of Sheppey is advertising for a chief scorpion wrangler to keep an eye on a colony of scorpions which have been living in the walls of Sheerness Dockyard, opposite the centre, for more than 200 years.

Centre boss Jenny Hurkett, 75, said: "They are one of our island’s strangest tourist attractions. People come from far and wide to catch a glimpse of them after the sun goes down.

"But we want someone to monitor them to ensure they are safe. No-one else seems to be looking out for them."

The yellow-tailed scorpions have been living on Sheppey for more than 200 years.

It is believed they hitched a ride to Britain in the early 1800s on ships bringing granite blocks to Sheppey during the reign of King George III to help build the dockyard wall, which was completed in 1813.
posted by chariot pulled by cassowaries (15 comments total) 5 users marked this as a favorite
 
"But we want someone to monitor them to ensure they are safe. No-one else seems to be looking out for them."

They seem to be doing fine without any help!
posted by chavenet at 5:51 AM on November 20 [1 favorite]


"The Sheppey arachnids are tiny – growing to no longer than 45mm

A 4.5 cm / 1.8" long scorpion is tiny? Relative to what, elephants?

Maybe arthropods in Britain just tend to be unusually large, so this is small by comparison.
posted by fimbulvetr at 6:00 AM on November 20 [1 favorite]


A 4.5 cm / 1.8" long scorpion is tiny? Relative to what, elephants?

Relative to other species of scorpion like the Emperor Scorpion (Pandinus imperator), where adults average about 20 centimetres (7.9 in) in length and a weight of 30 g.
posted by chariot pulled by cassowaries at 6:14 AM on November 20 [3 favorites]


Relative to scorpions that are four times longer and weigh over an ounce, I guess.
posted by seanmpuckett at 6:14 AM on November 20


Relative to Scotland's pulmonoscorpius, which is over two feet long.
posted by mittens at 6:30 AM on November 20 [2 favorites]


If we can start the rumor that climate change will bring back such creatures as that polmoNOPEscorpius, I think we’d stop burning fossil fuels that same day.
posted by drowsy at 6:38 AM on November 20 [3 favorites]


Relative to Scotland's pulmonoscorpius, which is over two feet long.

The failure to use the past tense in this sentence should be a crime.

So presumably there is some native predation on these guys to keep them in check? Or is the climate harsh enough that it's a struggle for them to thrive beyond their little colony?
posted by Atreides at 6:55 AM on November 20 [2 favorites]


Those are about half the size on average of Florida’s scorpions, which have stung me plenty of times. I reckon I’m qualified for the job.
posted by toodleydoodley at 7:17 AM on November 20


Had to hire a feral pig wrangler at a uranium mine once. Went well.
posted by GamblingBlues at 7:23 AM on November 20 [4 favorites]


Had to hire a feral pig wrangler at a uranium mine once. Went well.

I'm listening.
posted by Optamystic at 7:32 AM on November 20 [3 favorites]


Legit question - How do I kill the 30-50 glowing feral hogs that run into my yard within 3-5 mins while my small glowing kids play?
posted by orange ball at 7:41 AM on November 20 [3 favorites]


The glowing feral hogs are intentional, please do not disrupt our multi-millenium plan to safeguard the uranium site
posted by Slackermagee at 7:47 AM on November 20


Do not taunt glowing feral hogs.
posted by nickmark at 7:48 AM on November 20 [1 favorite]


Relative to Scotland's pulmonoscorpius, which is over two feet long.

Holy cats, found in West Lothian? Seventeen miles away from where I'm sitting right now?

You know those moments when something terrible happens somewhere you've visited recently and you think, "Wow, if I'd been there only a few days/weeks/months later than I was, I could totally have been killed"—well, that, except for "days/weeks/months" substitute "hundred million years".
posted by rory at 7:56 AM on November 20 [3 favorites]


The Sheppey arachnids are tiny – growing to no longer than 45mm
> Relative to what, elephants?


This smacks of "journalist who's a bit vague on conversions and thinks that anything measured in mm is tiny".

The photographer whose UV photo they used has some nice ones in normal light, where "nice" is my euphemism for "AAIIIIEEEEEE!".

I must admit that I'm giving this whole story some side-eye, with lines like "We want someone to monitor them to ensure they are safe. No-one else seems to be looking out for them.” In my experience, the usual stance to take towards introduced species on islands, especially venomous ones that have a chance of spreading as the climate warms, is to KILL THEM, EXTERMINATE THEM, MONITOR THEM TO ENSURE THEY ARE SAFELY CONTAINED PENDING ERADICATION.

But in their proper place, marvels of nature, endlessly fascinating, look at his smol little stinger, etc.
posted by rory at 8:18 AM on November 20


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