In 1972, a crack commando unit was sent to prison ...

March 3, 2005 2:06 AM

If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find them on Craigslist, maybe you can hire the A-Team.
posted by seanyboy (13 comments total)

The printable (no adverts, all on the one page) version can be found here.
posted by seanyboy at 2:08 AM on March 3, 2005

For those of us that don't read the comments first, the "all on one page" version would have been better in the FPP..... I got bored clicking "next page" and I ain't going back now.....
posted by HuronBob at 2:14 AM on March 3, 2005

this one is golden:

I'm replying to your posting on Craiglist for assistance wanted. I'm a pilot, I speak fluent Spanish as well, and I weld. Does the "bouncer type" have to be the welder? Good luck on that. Bouncer-types generally aren't too bright. Now about the guns. When you say, "no deaths" do you mean maybe one or two? I don't know if you are aware how fast Mexicans multiply.

Being of Mexican descent myself I know this as fact. If a couple should happen to expire in the rescuing of your friend, there are plenty more to take their place. Besides, she coundn't have been that good a friend if you don't want anyone killed. Please let me know if I can be of any assistance.

i pity the fool.
posted by three blind mice at 2:18 AM on March 3, 2005

HuronBob. It's 7 short pages total. I feel your pain, my adhd brother.
posted by shmegegge at 2:47 AM on March 3, 2005

personally, I like the one that ends with "This better not be a joke." Homicidal AND no sense of humor? Glee!
posted by shmegegge at 2:48 AM on March 3, 2005

shmegegge.... i know, i'm adhd AND lazy... one click/seven clicks... sounds like seven times as much work..now I'm tired, what are we doing next, are we there yet, can i get one, no I want a different one now....
posted by HuronBob at 5:22 AM on March 3, 2005

Funny, but not nearly as much as I would have hoped. Many of the "interested" emails were clearly people who also go the joke.
posted by absalom at 5:27 AM on March 3, 2005

Cute, but a little bit of a letdown. I want it to go somewhere, like to a Latin American country, where actual ass is kicked and actual names are taken.
posted by OmieWise at 5:53 AM on March 3, 2005

It's also a viral marketing campaign for the upcoming A-Team movie.
posted by TonyRobots at 5:55 AM on March 3, 2005

LADHD? So if I get this right, you can't keep your attention focused for a prolonged period of time on all the stuff you're too lazy to do? Which is because of your short attention span, right? Which, in turn, stems from the fact that you're lazy? Wow, I'm going to write an op-ed on this and scare a whole new generation of parents. :)
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 6:28 AM on March 3, 2005

I'd like to see this done for some other old school TV shows as well. Knight Rider would be pretty entertaining.

"Man with no past and new face looking for winsome female in need of adventuring skills. Expert at karate chop and bausing things in distance to explode. Can provide own invulnerable talking car."
posted by Brockstar at 7:49 AM on March 3, 2005

I like the ideas for casting in the comments after the article (the presidential cast was pretty good). I can throw out odd, half-baked casting ideas out as well as anyone:

Murdock: Johnny Depp
Face: Matt Damon? Val Kilmer? Robert Duncan McNeill? Someone more "tall and dark?"
B.A: A tough one. Might as well annoy the purists and say...Halle Berry. Could be interesting.
Hannibal: ...or, we could put a woman here, instead. If not Scott Bakula or Clooney or (dare I say it) Harrison Ford, then maybe someone like Linda Hamilton?

I unfortunately don't have a great depth of actors' names in my head to pull from.

On a slightly related note, I saw a van painted exactly like the A-team van a while back...except it was in Korea and as a result very small. I wish I could have gotten a picture.
posted by RikiTikiTavi at 3:57 PM on March 3, 2005

B.A: A tough one. Might as well annoy the purists and say...Halle Berry. Could be interesting.

You want interesting? Gary Coleman.
For added confusion, cast Anthony Hopkins as Hannibal.
posted by bachelor#3 at 6:12 AM on March 4, 2005