whoa, that's a big cobra

January 16, 2009 2:25 PM

The big biggest cobra and Austin Stevens. Snake Bite TV: Austin Stevens getting bitten by cobra.
posted by nickyskye (31 comments total)

You mess with the bull, you get the horns.
posted by COBRA! at 2:27 PM on January 16, 2009

*backs away*
posted by starman at 2:32 PM on January 16, 2009

*roots for cobra*
posted by mrnutty at 2:38 PM on January 16, 2009

This is the first time I've yelled "Leave it alone, you jackass!" at a nature video since Steve Irwin died.
posted by stavrogin at 2:39 PM on January 16, 2009 [4 favorites]

This is the first time I've yelled "Leave it alone, you jackass!" at a nature video since Steve Irwin died.

And yet, that bastard ray just wouldn't listen. Damn you, sea creature from Hell! Tears, tears, I have nothing left but tears...
posted by billysumday at 2:40 PM on January 16, 2009

Stevens: Looks at that hood. Beautiful.

Snake: Go away. Please. I'm just trying to get by here. Get out of my way.

Stevens: It's all a warning.

Snake: Why won't you just fucking leave me alone? Who are you?

Stevens: If this snake was now faced by a mongoose he'd probably be in trouble, because a mongoose is able to wait for that strike and--

Snake: All righty, then.

[CHOMP]
posted by gottabefunky at 2:41 PM on January 16, 2009 [6 favorites]

That snake clearly doesn't remember apartheid. Pity.
posted by strawberryviagra at 2:45 PM on January 16, 2009

No problem, it was his bionic arm.
posted by PontifexPrimus at 3:04 PM on January 16, 2009 [2 favorites]

If that snake were a mammoth he'd be... all kinds of confusing
posted by Dumsnill at 3:13 PM on January 16, 2009

Fucking goddamnit, Metafilter! I just squirted down my pants! I fucking hate snakes!
posted by Lipstick Thespian at 3:22 PM on January 16, 2009

During the filming of the closing scene, I think that the only reason for his heady enthusiasm is that he didn't check his rear view mirror....
posted by Kronos_to_Earth at 3:35 PM on January 16, 2009

You know, I recently saw a video of a guy sticking a jar up his ass, the jar subsequently breaking and him trying to pull bloody broken glass out of his ass. I barely even reacted to that. But for some reason watching that guy get bit by a snake freaked the shit out of me.
posted by dead cousin ted at 4:06 PM on January 16, 2009

I hate that thing he keeps doing with his hands. I keep half-expecting him to just up and slap the cobra, just for the mad joy of it.
posted by Rhaomi at 4:07 PM on January 16, 2009

They can rebuild him.
posted by Artw at 4:08 PM on January 16, 2009

yeah, saw this on teevee last year and it struck (get it? lol/lol) me as a stunt, I would point out that he tried to get bitten, but everybody knows that.
posted by dawson at 4:23 PM on January 16, 2009

Count me in amongst those rooting for the snake. It's an amazing animal, I just wish they'd come up with a way to photograph it that didn't involve showing off and harassing it. I kept expecting Bear Grylls to leap from the treetops, beat the snake to death with his ego, and use its skin as a rope to climb down a nearby waterfall.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 4:28 PM on January 16, 2009 [1 favorite]

I totally love Steve Irwin the environmentalist and zoologist, and Steve Irwin the person, but dammit I hate what his popularity has done to nature documentary and television. I'll take the deceptively-filmed, Foley'ed-over Attenborough style of nature show any day. It's just plain boring, watching some jackass mess around with beautiful and interesting animals in a flailing, exaggerated way while some other jackass zooms in tight on his face every 30 seconds. I want to see what the animals do, not what they do when you harass them. If that was worthwhile I'd go to the zoo and throw ice cubes at the meerkats.
posted by penduluum at 4:34 PM on January 16, 2009 [1 favorite]

That snake be representin', yo.

Seriously, snakes do what snakes do. He was defending himself , and only then as a last resort. Even Stevens said the snake was trying to get away rather than getting into a confrontation.

Just another example of the Man trying to hold a snake down.
posted by Benny Andajetz at 4:43 PM on January 16, 2009

He was defending himself, It was defending itself ( my anthropomorphism was showing)
posted by Benny Andajetz at 4:51 PM on January 16, 2009

I was really rooting for the snake to get him a second time.
posted by orme at 5:10 PM on January 16, 2009

To be fair to you, Benny Andajetz, it's a King Cobra. They are usually male while the Queen cobra could easily be male or female.

That thing he's doing with his hands is supposed to prevent the snake from having a target. You'd be surprised how often it works.
posted by Lesser Shrew at 5:12 PM on January 16, 2009

Fucking goddamnit, Metafilter! I just squirted down my pants!

Please! Think of the sea kittens!
posted by Devils Rancher at 5:17 PM on January 16, 2009

You know, I recently saw a video of a guy sticking a jar up his ass, the jar subsequently breaking and him trying to pull bloody broken glass out of his ass.

Well, someone has to top two girls, one cup.
posted by fatbird at 5:19 PM on January 16, 2009

Well, someone has to top two girls, one cup.

Yeah - although the sequel, Three Men and a Baby, also sucked ass, it lacked the impact and conviction of the original.

/...The Aristocrats!
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 5:25 PM on January 16, 2009

For any fellow herpetology enjoyers out there, wasn't that sooo cool when the cobra stood up, four feet high? That was one jumbo snake. He put the king in king cobra. Reminded me of Mowgli's Kaa or that giant cobra that protected the gold in the Jungle Stories.
posted by nickyskye at 8:19 PM on January 16, 2009

At the end, I said outloud, "Now, give the poor snake a mouse or something!". He gave that snake a bad day, and owes him one. Poor snake wasted all kinds of energy trying to escape and defend itself.

Now, please, I'd like to see him do the same thing with a rinkhals. Those snakes spit their venom, and aim for the face. Their color varies, but I've seen a photo of one that was vividly black and gold.
posted by Goofyy at 9:16 PM on January 16, 2009

I saw this show on TV the other day for the first time, him looking for Komodo Dragons. It struck me as such a setup. The camera angles and coverage seem impossibly good. Even more so that in Bear Grylis' show. I don't really plan to watch again.
posted by sycophant at 12:07 AM on January 17, 2009

Yeah kind of struck me as crossing The Crocodile Hunter with The Matrix.

The Crocodrix Hunter : Revolutions!
posted by mannequito at 4:26 AM on January 17, 2009

That cobra was doing the right and natural thing. It only bit him because it didn't have a fist to cockpunch him for being such an idiot.
posted by louche mustachio at 5:06 AM on January 17, 2009

One minor point: Steve Irwin was never bitten by a venomous snake. This makes him better than the 'Six Million Dollar' man.
posted by UseyurBrain at 7:14 AM on January 17, 2009

Steve Irwin was never bitten by a venomous snake.
One reason might be that Irwin seeded to actually respect reptiles.
posted by dawson at 1:26 PM on January 17, 2009