July 30, 2001
2:34 PM Subscribe
20 percent would give up great sex or personal wealth if some genie would grant them eternally perfect hair. Women think about their hair almost as much as they think about sex. A new poll says that a woman spends 43 minutes a day thinking about her hair vs. 48 minutes a day thinking about sex.
I think if they asked men, Will of Big Brother 2 would give it all up to maintain his gorgeous coiffure.
posted by LeiaS at 2:46 PM on July 30, 2001
posted by LeiaS at 2:46 PM on July 30, 2001
They forgot the 79 minutes a day women think about bludgeoning to a bloody pulp pollsters who deliberately set out to make women look like idiots.
posted by kristin at 3:00 PM on July 30, 2001
posted by kristin at 3:00 PM on July 30, 2001
why would we want jennifer aniston's hair?
I dunno, since it seems she doesn't want it either.
posted by 120degrees at 3:11 PM on July 30, 2001
I dunno, since it seems she doesn't want it either.
posted by 120degrees at 3:11 PM on July 30, 2001
I helped Kristin with her market data on that one, so I know it's accurate. My personal results were actually 85 minutes a day thinking about bludgeoning pollsters, but I'm slightly more violent than the average woman.
posted by annathea at 3:12 PM on July 30, 2001
posted by annathea at 3:12 PM on July 30, 2001
The 'average' woman thinks about sex for 48 minutes a day? Jeez, what a waste of time, they should be doing it instead.
posted by wackybrit at 3:16 PM on July 30, 2001
posted by wackybrit at 3:16 PM on July 30, 2001
I'm thinking hard about this one. I've often said if there was a pill I could take to never have to shave again, I'd take it, even if it meant all the other hair on my body would fall out too. But give up sex? Hmmmmmmm. Tough decision. Still, if all the hair on my body fell out, I might not have much choice, anyway.
posted by kindall at 3:17 PM on July 30, 2001
posted by kindall at 3:17 PM on July 30, 2001
does thinking about having sex with pollsters count in that 48 minutes?
posted by mb01 at 3:29 PM on July 30, 2001
posted by mb01 at 3:29 PM on July 30, 2001
48 minutes thinking about sex? Did anyone get the phone numbers?
posted by NJguy at 3:45 PM on July 30, 2001
posted by NJguy at 3:45 PM on July 30, 2001
annathea: 7.6% more violent, to be precise.
kindall: You don't have to shave ever again, actually, but I suppose the beard would eventually become substantial enough to be more trouble than shaving.
posted by moss at 3:51 PM on July 30, 2001
kindall: You don't have to shave ever again, actually, but I suppose the beard would eventually become substantial enough to be more trouble than shaving.
posted by moss at 3:51 PM on July 30, 2001
hah. I spend 21.7 percent more time thinking violent thoughts about my hair than the average woman.
weed whacker, thy name is liberation.
posted by Sapphireblue at 4:18 PM on July 30, 2001
weed whacker, thy name is liberation.
posted by Sapphireblue at 4:18 PM on July 30, 2001
And which shampoo company sponsored this survey?
Dear lordy, the silly season is upon us.
(no. 4, every month. Buddha had a point: and for once, so did St Paul.)
posted by holgate at 4:23 PM on July 30, 2001
Dear lordy, the silly season is upon us.
(no. 4, every month. Buddha had a point: and for once, so did St Paul.)
posted by holgate at 4:23 PM on July 30, 2001
this is what happens when you do your surveys in texas
(ducks)
posted by christina at 4:27 PM on July 30, 2001
(ducks)
posted by christina at 4:27 PM on July 30, 2001
I spend 48 minutes a day either thinking about or actually having sex with Buddha, St. Paul and various peoples' hair. Sometimes these acts involve a weed whacker, and they sometimes take place in Texas, Mr. Senator.
posted by Kafkaesque at 4:34 PM on July 30, 2001
posted by Kafkaesque at 4:34 PM on July 30, 2001
I spend 48 minutes an hour thinking about sex. But I have good hair.
posted by Neale at 4:46 PM on July 30, 2001
posted by Neale at 4:46 PM on July 30, 2001
I would be willing to give up thinking about sex 480 minutes a day for eternally perfect hair. By my calculations, that that will still leave me 117 minutes of quality about-sex-thinking.
posted by Shadowkeeper at 4:48 PM on July 30, 2001
posted by Shadowkeeper at 4:48 PM on July 30, 2001
This sounds like those TV Nation polls by Michael Moore on his (sadly) cancelled TV show. His point: by polling the right people, you can get numbers to say anything you want.
posted by gramcracker at 5:24 PM on July 30, 2001
posted by gramcracker at 5:24 PM on July 30, 2001
What is eternally perfect hair? Bah. I want my hair only as good as I am, thankyou.
posted by spandex at 5:38 PM on July 30, 2001
posted by spandex at 5:38 PM on July 30, 2001
that's ok, the man show once did a poll:
"if you could take a pill that made you smarter, but gave you a fat ass, would you take it?"
most women said no.
posted by jcterminal at 6:30 PM on July 30, 2001
"if you could take a pill that made you smarter, but gave you a fat ass, would you take it?"
most women said no.
posted by jcterminal at 6:30 PM on July 30, 2001
maybe most women think they're smart enough already?
"if you could take a pill that made you smarter, but gave you a smaller penis, would you take it?"
posted by rabi at 6:34 PM on July 30, 2001
"if you could take a pill that made you smarter, but gave you a smaller penis, would you take it?"
posted by rabi at 6:34 PM on July 30, 2001
i spend less than 10 minutes each day thinking about my hair.
did anyone else notice that SALON SELECTIVES sponsored the poll? that means that there were probably three questions asked of each woman: 1) how many minutes of each day do you spend thinking about your hair? 2) how many minutes of each day do you spend thinking about sex? 3) which celebrity's hair would you most like to have?
what a waste of everyone's time this stupid poll was.
posted by lunarennui at 6:41 PM on July 30, 2001
did anyone else notice that SALON SELECTIVES sponsored the poll? that means that there were probably three questions asked of each woman: 1) how many minutes of each day do you spend thinking about your hair? 2) how many minutes of each day do you spend thinking about sex? 3) which celebrity's hair would you most like to have?
what a waste of everyone's time this stupid poll was.
posted by lunarennui at 6:41 PM on July 30, 2001
Polls are the opiate of the masses, and distract you from our dark machinations...
posted by aramaic at 7:21 PM on July 30, 2001
posted by aramaic at 7:21 PM on July 30, 2001
A side benefit would be possible sainthood, Catholics love people who don't decompose. Hey, that genie offered "eternally perfect," and I'll hold her to it.
In a magical world where penis shrinkage were the ONLY side effect, I might take such a pill, Rabi. It would depend on how favorable the ratio of IQ points to inches was. It would have to be a damn good ratio though, I have an (understandable) emotional attachment to all parts of my body, and perhaps especially that one.
Fat ass though, hell yeah! I'd have a lot to think about while on the Nordic Trac.
posted by Nothing at 9:41 PM on July 30, 2001
In a magical world where penis shrinkage were the ONLY side effect, I might take such a pill, Rabi. It would depend on how favorable the ratio of IQ points to inches was. It would have to be a damn good ratio though, I have an (understandable) emotional attachment to all parts of my body, and perhaps especially that one.
Fat ass though, hell yeah! I'd have a lot to think about while on the Nordic Trac.
posted by Nothing at 9:41 PM on July 30, 2001
"if you could take a pill that made you smarter, but gave you a smaller penis, would you take it?"
sure.
wow. that wasn't hard.
(no pun intended.)
posted by jcterminal at 10:48 PM on July 30, 2001
sure.
wow. that wasn't hard.
(no pun intended.)
posted by jcterminal at 10:48 PM on July 30, 2001
How much smarter, and how much smaller?
An IQ point a centimetre, no. An IQ point a millimetre, oh baby yeah!
And just never mind with the anti-metric-rhetoric too, you scamps.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 11:02 PM on July 30, 2001
An IQ point a centimetre, no. An IQ point a millimetre, oh baby yeah!
And just never mind with the anti-metric-rhetoric too, you scamps.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 11:02 PM on July 30, 2001
How about the other way: if you could take a pill that made you dumber but sexier, would you take it?
posted by pracowity at 11:53 PM on July 30, 2001
posted by pracowity at 11:53 PM on July 30, 2001
Isn't that called Ecstacy?
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 12:56 AM on July 31, 2001
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 12:56 AM on July 31, 2001
I thought Ecstacy was the pill that makes unattractive people dumb enough to think they're sexy?
Anyway, I'm talking about a permanent change: take this pill and know that you'll wake up very sexually attractive but with a brain the size of a walnut. Do you take it?
posted by pracowity at 1:39 AM on July 31, 2001
Anyway, I'm talking about a permanent change: take this pill and know that you'll wake up very sexually attractive but with a brain the size of a walnut. Do you take it?
posted by pracowity at 1:39 AM on July 31, 2001
Pracowity, the only thing is.....I find intelligence to be an extremely sexy quality in itself.
A predilection that has inured me from ever having to endure the emotionally crippling affliction of self-love.
posted by lucien at 2:44 AM on July 31, 2001
A predilection that has inured me from ever having to endure the emotionally crippling affliction of self-love.
posted by lucien at 2:44 AM on July 31, 2001
(brain explodes)
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 4:12 AM on July 31, 2001
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 4:12 AM on July 31, 2001
> I find intelligence to be an extremely sexy quality in itself.
Einstein gives you a woody?
Anyway, it isn't what you think is sexy that matters; it's that the pill would make you much sexier to others, but only, mind you, if you choose to join the folk who chortle all night at the sitcoms.
posted by pracowity at 4:43 AM on July 31, 2001
Einstein gives you a woody?
Anyway, it isn't what you think is sexy that matters; it's that the pill would make you much sexier to others, but only, mind you, if you choose to join the folk who chortle all night at the sitcoms.
posted by pracowity at 4:43 AM on July 31, 2001
So where's the URL for copies of the logs they made women keep to figure out how many minutes per day they think about sex?
posted by straight at 6:28 AM on July 31, 2001
posted by straight at 6:28 AM on July 31, 2001
would I take a pill that would make me sexy but stupid? no, not a chance.
would I take a pill that would make me smarter but fat? that is a hell of a question, but I still think no, which might be evidence that I'm not as smart as I think I am. :P
posted by rabi at 6:48 AM on July 31, 2001
would I take a pill that would make me smarter but fat? that is a hell of a question, but I still think no, which might be evidence that I'm not as smart as I think I am. :P
posted by rabi at 6:48 AM on July 31, 2001
why would you want to be smarter? That pill sounds like a lose-lose situation.
posted by jeb at 7:36 AM on July 31, 2001
posted by jeb at 7:36 AM on July 31, 2001
A new study shows that women spend 46 of those 48 minutes thinking about having sex with a man with no hair. [ObDis: My bald (by choice) husband made me post this.]
posted by Dreama at 8:30 AM on July 31, 2001
posted by Dreama at 8:30 AM on July 31, 2001
I don't think I'd take any of those offers ... has anyone except me actually *read* any fairy tales? If it sounds like a good deal, it most definitely is NOT. =)
posted by Johannahh at 8:41 AM on July 31, 2001
posted by Johannahh at 8:41 AM on July 31, 2001
I thought Ecstacy was the pill that makes unattractive people dumb enough to think they're sexy?
According to the new Ben Folds album, it makes it possible for white boys to dance...
why would you want to be smarter?
Why wouldn't you? Higher IQ correlates with, among other things, better jobs and higher salaries. It's a no-brainer (no pun intended).
posted by kindall at 8:49 AM on July 31, 2001
According to the new Ben Folds album, it makes it possible for white boys to dance...
why would you want to be smarter?
Why wouldn't you? Higher IQ correlates with, among other things, better jobs and higher salaries. It's a no-brainer (no pun intended).
posted by kindall at 8:49 AM on July 31, 2001
Why wouldn't you? Higher IQ correlates with, among other things, better jobs and higher salaries. It's a no-brainer (no pun intended).
My experience with the idiots in upper management differs from your assertion.
Though, they do tend to have bigger asses.
posted by amanda at 9:45 AM on July 31, 2001
My experience with the idiots in upper management differs from your assertion.
Though, they do tend to have bigger asses.
posted by amanda at 9:45 AM on July 31, 2001
I have gorgeous hair. Anyone want to swap it for a sex life?
posted by fullerine at 10:31 AM on July 31, 2001
posted by fullerine at 10:31 AM on July 31, 2001
I'd permanently give up the 'right' to have sex in return for $10,000,000. I'm not joking. Offers please.
posted by wackybrit at 11:11 AM on July 31, 2001
posted by wackybrit at 11:11 AM on July 31, 2001
Bidding war! Bidding war over here!
Would you consider 12 beer and a friendly pat on the back?
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 7:39 PM on July 31, 2001
Would you consider 12 beer and a friendly pat on the back?
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 7:39 PM on July 31, 2001
Einstein gives you a woody?
Hell yeah. Whatever else Einstein contributed to the world knowledge-bank, he always said his proudest contribution was to definitively prove the validity of the high IQ to bad hair day quotient.
posted by lucien at 3:13 PM on August 1, 2001
Hell yeah. Whatever else Einstein contributed to the world knowledge-bank, he always said his proudest contribution was to definitively prove the validity of the high IQ to bad hair day quotient.
posted by lucien at 3:13 PM on August 1, 2001
« Older The Princess Bride... | Microsoft vs. AOL Newer »
This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments
posted by annathea at 2:42 PM on July 30, 2001