It’s just “resting cat face.”
February 25, 2019 4:51 PM Subscribe
I mean, by this metric neither do I. Oh my god. Neither do I.
posted by es_de_bah at 5:00 PM on February 25, 2019 [7 favorites]
posted by es_de_bah at 5:00 PM on February 25, 2019 [7 favorites]
Dogs don’t feel shame because they don’t do bad things.
posted by winna at 5:50 PM on February 25, 2019 [17 favorites]
posted by winna at 5:50 PM on February 25, 2019 [17 favorites]
They're good dogs, Horowitz
posted by dis_integration at 6:02 PM on February 25, 2019 [1 favorite]
posted by dis_integration at 6:02 PM on February 25, 2019 [1 favorite]
It's so cute when the help tries to understand their masters.
posted by signal at 6:07 PM on February 25, 2019 [8 favorites]
posted by signal at 6:07 PM on February 25, 2019 [8 favorites]
I’ve seen this before and my personal confirmation bias will always override any science I see about it and I will die on this hill
posted by Betty_effn_White at 6:18 PM on February 25, 2019 [3 favorites]
posted by Betty_effn_White at 6:18 PM on February 25, 2019 [3 favorites]
the guilty look is likely a submissive response that has proved advantageous because it reduces conflict between dog and human.
But... but that just makes dogs more awesome 😭🐶
posted by Foci for Analysis at 6:22 PM on February 25, 2019 [4 favorites]
But... but that just makes dogs more awesome 😭🐶
posted by Foci for Analysis at 6:22 PM on February 25, 2019 [4 favorites]
the cat reigns among those more contemplative and imaginative spirits who ask of the universe only the objective sight of poignant, ethereal beauty and the animate symbolisation of Nature’s bland, relentless, reposeful, unhurried, and impersonal order and sufficiency. The dog gives, but the cat is.
I despise his racism, but on the subject of cats, Mr. Lovecraft and I are in alignment. I like dogs, but I adore my little psychopaths
posted by Redhush at 6:26 PM on February 25, 2019 [10 favorites]
I despise his racism, but on the subject of cats, Mr. Lovecraft and I are in alignment. I like dogs, but I adore my little psychopaths
posted by Redhush at 6:26 PM on February 25, 2019 [10 favorites]
**they are not
they sure do poop a lot though
posted by mwhybark at 6:36 PM on February 25, 2019 [3 favorites]
they sure do poop a lot though
posted by mwhybark at 6:36 PM on February 25, 2019 [3 favorites]
How to give a cat a pill ... and a dog, too
I rest my case.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 6:44 PM on February 25, 2019 [11 favorites]
I rest my case.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 6:44 PM on February 25, 2019 [11 favorites]
My cat will happily eat a pill if it is surrounded by a little bacon. My parents' dog licks all the peanut butter off his pills and hides the pill.
posted by jeather at 6:51 PM on February 25, 2019 [6 favorites]
posted by jeather at 6:51 PM on February 25, 2019 [6 favorites]
Oh yeah, dogs are all about appeasement. Cats are small and agile enough that they can just go hide when the humans get shouty.
Of my two dogs, one looked guilty and sad literally all the time. He was a neurotic ball of anxiety The other was dumb as a box full of successively smaller empty boxes and went through life blissfully giving zero fucks about any of his transgressions.
Also resting cat face is my new self-descriptor, so thanks for that!
posted by soren_lorensen at 6:57 PM on February 25, 2019 [4 favorites]
Of my two dogs, one looked guilty and sad literally all the time. He was a neurotic ball of anxiety The other was dumb as a box full of successively smaller empty boxes and went through life blissfully giving zero fucks about any of his transgressions.
Also resting cat face is my new self-descriptor, so thanks for that!
posted by soren_lorensen at 6:57 PM on February 25, 2019 [4 favorites]
This, and the general fact of dogs being comparatively unsung but still superlatively shameless manipulators to which this behavior is a corollary, is obvious to anyone who has been a dog's caretaker for any significant amount of time. They excel at pushing our emotional buttons, and they know it. Maybe it's the fact that I admire that so much that's turned me from a die-hard dog person to a caretaker of both dogs and cats who values both equally. They ply their trade in such different ways, but neither are saps.
posted by invitapriore at 6:59 PM on February 25, 2019 [7 favorites]
posted by invitapriore at 6:59 PM on February 25, 2019 [7 favorites]
Not to be a total downer, but as a cat lover it bums me out at times that cats have this weird psycho/asshole pop culture image. Primarily it bums me out because IMHO, the kind of behavior that people point to when referencing it often sounds to me like signs of an animal in distress, either because it is actively being mistreated or was in the past mistreated. It would be like judging all dogs on the behavior of an obviously mistreated (and thus aggressive and dangerous) one.
I mean I'm not saying they can't do things at times that make them seem like jerks just because animals are weird and inscrutable; just, I feel like a lot of people don't know how to interact with cats and thus do so badly, and then act like it's the cat's fault that it didn't handle it better.
posted by tocts at 7:27 PM on February 25, 2019 [31 favorites]
I mean I'm not saying they can't do things at times that make them seem like jerks just because animals are weird and inscrutable; just, I feel like a lot of people don't know how to interact with cats and thus do so badly, and then act like it's the cat's fault that it didn't handle it better.
posted by tocts at 7:27 PM on February 25, 2019 [31 favorites]
My cat is the least psychopathic person living in my house. Have you met a nine year old boy? I mean, you poke a cat, I imagine it has the good sense to run away and hide instead of wailing loudly, waiting 30 seconds and poking his brother back, who then slugs the original pokee which of course escalates into a bilateral free for all even though you were clear they’d lose access to the Switch but then they are genuinely in despair and genuinely mystified as to how they could be completely innocent of any wrong doing yet they’re the one being punished and now they’ve got an internally justified reason to torment their brother for all of this and they’ve already lost privileges and they weren’t going to eat that disgusting dinner you made anyway...
If anyone needs me I’ll be locked in the bathroom hugging my cat.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 8:11 PM on February 25, 2019 [24 favorites]
If anyone needs me I’ll be locked in the bathroom hugging my cat.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 8:11 PM on February 25, 2019 [24 favorites]
I will say, echoing tocts’ sentiment slightly, that I think a lot of people with cats impose their sense that cats are standoffish and mean onto those cats, and it ends up being self-fulfilling. Our cats are extremely sociable and cuddly and I’m quite sure that a lot of that has to do with the fact that that’s how we’ve always related to them. For sure some cats have either dispositions or histories that lead to them being standoffish or shy, but it’s not some immutable given. The one cat of ours that I took in myself sleeps at my side every night, and she and I have developed this understanding wherein I can move her around or take her tail out from under my head if it’s gotten caught and it’s totally cool and extremely comforting for both of us. Just as dogs are undersung manipulators, cats are undersung sweethearts. Non-human animals are great, and we underestimate them all the time.
posted by invitapriore at 8:26 PM on February 25, 2019 [15 favorites]
posted by invitapriore at 8:26 PM on February 25, 2019 [15 favorites]
If you want to see the opposite of "dog shame", spend some quality time over at /r/whatswrongwithyourdog.
posted by JoeZydeco at 9:54 PM on February 25, 2019 [2 favorites]
posted by JoeZydeco at 9:54 PM on February 25, 2019 [2 favorites]
If you want to feel like a psychopath, you can get cats to take pills by prying their jaws apart, throwing it down their throat, closing their mouth and then blowing (gently) in their nostrils to get them to swallow. It’s HORRIBLE but it works (the foster office with the humane society I volunteer for taught me this). It works for dogs too. The last time I did it to a foster chihuahua I cried because she gave me the saddest look you can imagine. “You are killing me softly, human, and yet I still love you.”
I hate dog shaming. I mean, I find it really funny if it’s just a sign or a teasing voice. But I also really hate how stressed out the dogs are and how we project onto them. Dogs may get anxious when they’re left along and they panic and might eat or destroy things. Someone posted this lovely quote about reactive dogs that basically applies to all misbehaving dogs: your dog isn’t giving you a hard time. You dog is having a hard time.
posted by the thorn bushes have roses at 10:17 PM on February 25, 2019 [8 favorites]
I hate dog shaming. I mean, I find it really funny if it’s just a sign or a teasing voice. But I also really hate how stressed out the dogs are and how we project onto them. Dogs may get anxious when they’re left along and they panic and might eat or destroy things. Someone posted this lovely quote about reactive dogs that basically applies to all misbehaving dogs: your dog isn’t giving you a hard time. You dog is having a hard time.
posted by the thorn bushes have roses at 10:17 PM on February 25, 2019 [8 favorites]
The sample is skewed. We don’t let “asshole” dogs live with us like we do “asshole” cats. So of course it looks like there are more psychopath cats than dogs out there.
We have an asshole cat. We love her dearly in the small spaces she allows. There’s nothing to misunderstand about her: she wants to be left alone. So we do. Both of our kids learned from a small age she is The Cat Who Must Not Be Touched. Both of them got bopped on the head a few times while learning what her boundaries are and now, magically, she tolerates them more than the grownups. Chalk one up for the psychopaths.
posted by not_the_water at 10:35 PM on February 25, 2019 [3 favorites]
We have an asshole cat. We love her dearly in the small spaces she allows. There’s nothing to misunderstand about her: she wants to be left alone. So we do. Both of our kids learned from a small age she is The Cat Who Must Not Be Touched. Both of them got bopped on the head a few times while learning what her boundaries are and now, magically, she tolerates them more than the grownups. Chalk one up for the psychopaths.
posted by not_the_water at 10:35 PM on February 25, 2019 [3 favorites]
In medieval Europe, misbehaving mutts were routinely tried in court on criminal charges such as assault and murder; punishments ranged from jail to death.
This occurred with animals other than dogs as well. Dogs are obviously terrible, but I think we should be clear that this was kind of a thing of the time, not some special problem for them.
posted by Going To Maine at 12:13 AM on February 26, 2019 [1 favorite]
This occurred with animals other than dogs as well. Dogs are obviously terrible, but I think we should be clear that this was kind of a thing of the time, not some special problem for them.
posted by Going To Maine at 12:13 AM on February 26, 2019 [1 favorite]
I tend to think of our relationship with cats as a process of symbiosis rather than domestication, and I don't see them as psychopaths so much as lone predators inhabiting a specific evolutionary niche, one for which they're perfectly adapted.
Having lived with with a succession of alley cats whose domestic duties include keeping the house free of pests, what I see in a good mouser is not a psychopath but something far more intriguing. She is a killing machine who loves nothing more than to play. She shits neurotoxins to make her prey more amenable, and she will always give them a sporting chance because it's more fun that way. Once she has decimated the local rodent population, she will turn her attention to stalking bigger game, always finding the best places to lurk so she can leap out for maximum surprise value. In other words, not so much a psychopath as a competitive athlete.
It's true that it takes time to build the relationship, but in the end a well-adjusted cat is every bit as loving and sociable as any other domesticated mammal. They're just doing it on their own terms, and they don't do team sports the way that dogs do.
posted by Elizabeth the Thirteenth at 2:26 AM on February 26, 2019 [10 favorites]
Having lived with with a succession of alley cats whose domestic duties include keeping the house free of pests, what I see in a good mouser is not a psychopath but something far more intriguing. She is a killing machine who loves nothing more than to play. She shits neurotoxins to make her prey more amenable, and she will always give them a sporting chance because it's more fun that way. Once she has decimated the local rodent population, she will turn her attention to stalking bigger game, always finding the best places to lurk so she can leap out for maximum surprise value. In other words, not so much a psychopath as a competitive athlete.
It's true that it takes time to build the relationship, but in the end a well-adjusted cat is every bit as loving and sociable as any other domesticated mammal. They're just doing it on their own terms, and they don't do team sports the way that dogs do.
posted by Elizabeth the Thirteenth at 2:26 AM on February 26, 2019 [10 favorites]
Dogs are exhausting with their endless devotion. I don't need someone to gaze adoringly at me for hours on end. My cats are like really easy going roommates. We all do our own thing and more often than not we hang out together but no pressure either way. Whereas my mum's dog is all, I love you, you are so awesome, I must sit under your feet so you know this, omg, I love you etc etc. I really don't like clinginess from anyone. Cats are their own persons.
posted by kitten magic at 2:33 AM on February 26, 2019 [10 favorites]
posted by kitten magic at 2:33 AM on February 26, 2019 [10 favorites]
She shits neurotoxins to make her prey more amenable,
I believe this imputes an imagined intention to the cat, when the mechanism is designed to serve not the host cat, but the parasite. Further, it's been established that cats are only infectious with t gondii for three weeks of one of their nine lives.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 4:04 AM on February 26, 2019 [1 favorite]
I believe this imputes an imagined intention to the cat, when the mechanism is designed to serve not the host cat, but the parasite. Further, it's been established that cats are only infectious with t gondii for three weeks of one of their nine lives.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 4:04 AM on February 26, 2019 [1 favorite]
I believe this imputes an imagined intention to the cat, when the mechanism is designed to serve not the host cat, but the parasite.
designed??? *ahem*
I prefer to think of it as a self-reinforcing adaptive pathway in which everybody wins. The cat gets a good game and easy meat, while the mouse gets a few brief moments of joyous dangerous living, possibly finding more mice to mate with before being cruelly put to death by the cat. Just another one of those wonderful examples of evolution favouring beauty and reciprocity while being completely brutal about it.
posted by Elizabeth the Thirteenth at 4:22 AM on February 26, 2019 [3 favorites]
designed??? *ahem*
I prefer to think of it as a self-reinforcing adaptive pathway in which everybody wins. The cat gets a good game and easy meat, while the mouse gets a few brief moments of joyous dangerous living, possibly finding more mice to mate with before being cruelly put to death by the cat. Just another one of those wonderful examples of evolution favouring beauty and reciprocity while being completely brutal about it.
posted by Elizabeth the Thirteenth at 4:22 AM on February 26, 2019 [3 favorites]
If you want to feel like a psychopath, you can get cats to take pills by prying their jaws apart, throwing it down their throat, closing their mouth and then blowing (gently) in their nostrils to get them to swallow.
Also, there are these things called Pill Pockets. My old girl used to queue up for them in the afternoon.
posted by sebastienbailard at 4:56 AM on February 26, 2019
Also, there are these things called Pill Pockets. My old girl used to queue up for them in the afternoon.
posted by sebastienbailard at 4:56 AM on February 26, 2019
I've never had much luck with the pill treats. They either don't like them or just lick the coating off.
The "pop the pill in the back of their throat" method (and then stroke their throat/blow on their nose) results in a pill swallowed and a cat with a startled look on its face better than 90% of the time though. If you reward with their preferred treat afterwards, the cats learn to tolerate the procedure and don't run off when it's pill time. Works well with liquids too.
posted by bonehead at 6:10 AM on February 26, 2019 [1 favorite]
The "pop the pill in the back of their throat" method (and then stroke their throat/blow on their nose) results in a pill swallowed and a cat with a startled look on its face better than 90% of the time though. If you reward with their preferred treat afterwards, the cats learn to tolerate the procedure and don't run off when it's pill time. Works well with liquids too.
posted by bonehead at 6:10 AM on February 26, 2019 [1 favorite]
Cats may not be psychopaths*
I mean sure they have permission to not be psychopaths.
They just choose to be.
posted by srboisvert at 6:15 AM on February 26, 2019 [2 favorites]
I mean sure they have permission to not be psychopaths.
They just choose to be.
posted by srboisvert at 6:15 AM on February 26, 2019 [2 favorites]
I just wanted to note that "the Ainsworth Strange Situation" is a terrific phrase.
posted by doctornemo at 6:51 AM on February 26, 2019 [1 favorite]
posted by doctornemo at 6:51 AM on February 26, 2019 [1 favorite]
This test is terrible. The dog is being allowed to eat the treat with SOMEONE present. "While each owner was gone, she either removed the treat or fed it to the dog." This is approval, in my opinion, by someone.
My dog NEVER pees on the carpet unless we have literally forgotten about him for an entire day ( happened once) or if it is thundering. ( He is terrified and will literally not come out from under the bed until he quietly, while no one is in the room, sneak out and pee on the floor and then go back under the bed.) When I see the spot, I will call him out, and he will crawl out slowly, rear end first, tail between his leg and whimpering softly. Shaking like a hound dog trying to shit a peach pit. He will look at the spot, look at me, and then slowly drop his head and try to crawl back under the bed.
In addition, he LOVES to eat poisonous mushrooms. I will time and time again tell him no, and he will NOT drop the mushroom, but will try desperately to swallow it before I get to him in the yard. BUT - if I don't see him do it, he will walk in the house like normal and sit down in the living room, head down, staring at me, mushroom in mouth, guilty as fuck and just holding it in his mouth. I can pull as hard on his jaws as I want - he will not let go. It's only until I tell him "BAD DOG DROP THE DAMN MUSHROOM" that he will release his grip just enough for me to wrestle it out of his mouth. Then he slinks off to the bedroom, goes under the bed, and will not come out until at least five or six hours.
posted by bradth27 at 6:53 AM on February 26, 2019 [3 favorites]
My dog NEVER pees on the carpet unless we have literally forgotten about him for an entire day ( happened once) or if it is thundering. ( He is terrified and will literally not come out from under the bed until he quietly, while no one is in the room, sneak out and pee on the floor and then go back under the bed.) When I see the spot, I will call him out, and he will crawl out slowly, rear end first, tail between his leg and whimpering softly. Shaking like a hound dog trying to shit a peach pit. He will look at the spot, look at me, and then slowly drop his head and try to crawl back under the bed.
In addition, he LOVES to eat poisonous mushrooms. I will time and time again tell him no, and he will NOT drop the mushroom, but will try desperately to swallow it before I get to him in the yard. BUT - if I don't see him do it, he will walk in the house like normal and sit down in the living room, head down, staring at me, mushroom in mouth, guilty as fuck and just holding it in his mouth. I can pull as hard on his jaws as I want - he will not let go. It's only until I tell him "BAD DOG DROP THE DAMN MUSHROOM" that he will release his grip just enough for me to wrestle it out of his mouth. Then he slinks off to the bedroom, goes under the bed, and will not come out until at least five or six hours.
posted by bradth27 at 6:53 AM on February 26, 2019 [3 favorites]
I feel like people who think cats are all aloof and cold and uncaring haven't actually spent much time with cats.
posted by sarcasticah at 7:03 AM on February 26, 2019 [12 favorites]
posted by sarcasticah at 7:03 AM on February 26, 2019 [12 favorites]
I don't get this thing about resting cat face. Cats have expressions. They can look happy. They can look angry.
Maybe it's just that I like cats, but a resting cat face is still a pleasure to look at.
posted by Nancy Lebovitz at 7:37 AM on February 26, 2019 [6 favorites]
Maybe it's just that I like cats, but a resting cat face is still a pleasure to look at.
posted by Nancy Lebovitz at 7:37 AM on February 26, 2019 [6 favorites]
Going To Maine: Dogs are obviously terrible
You, sir, are no longer my friend.
kitten magic: Dogs are exhausting with their endless devotion.
Hmph. Your name explains your bad attitude.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 7:52 AM on February 26, 2019 [3 favorites]
You, sir, are no longer my friend.
kitten magic: Dogs are exhausting with their endless devotion.
Hmph. Your name explains your bad attitude.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 7:52 AM on February 26, 2019 [3 favorites]
I feel like people who think cats are all aloof and cold and uncaring haven't actually spent much time with cats.
But they're a pop culture stereotypes! Those are never a result of misunderstandings or overly-reductive.
posted by bonehead at 7:53 AM on February 26, 2019 [2 favorites]
But they're a pop culture stereotypes! Those are never a result of misunderstandings or overly-reductive.
posted by bonehead at 7:53 AM on February 26, 2019 [2 favorites]
> sarcasticah:
"I feel like people who think cats are all aloof and cold and uncaring haven't actually spent much time with cats."
This. Cats take care of you. When my son was born , my cat decided he was in charge of keeping the baby company. He'd snuggle up next to or close, carefully.
He also scratches and bites me and my wife plenty, but never my son.
When any one of us is sick and feels miserable, he'll hang out with us, sometimes lying on top of the body part that hurts.
posted by signal at 7:57 AM on February 26, 2019 [4 favorites]
"I feel like people who think cats are all aloof and cold and uncaring haven't actually spent much time with cats."
This. Cats take care of you. When my son was born , my cat decided he was in charge of keeping the baby company. He'd snuggle up next to or close, carefully.
He also scratches and bites me and my wife plenty, but never my son.
When any one of us is sick and feels miserable, he'll hang out with us, sometimes lying on top of the body part that hurts.
posted by signal at 7:57 AM on February 26, 2019 [4 favorites]
The Complicated Truth about a Cat's Purr. There's some fascinatingly suggestive work been done in the past decade or so about purr frequency being in the right range to promote bone health and soft tissue growth. Cats will absolutely want to sleep with sick humans and babies if given half a chance, and certainly each other when their friend cat is sick or injured.
posted by bonehead at 8:28 AM on February 26, 2019 [2 favorites]
posted by bonehead at 8:28 AM on February 26, 2019 [2 favorites]
Oh yeah one cat knows my going to bed routine so well and gets pissy when I take too long at it. First I need to lie down on my back for winding down time/so she can sit on my chest for a while, and when I am ready to sleep I can go onto my side and she will figure out some way to perch on my legs. Whenever I wake up in the middle of the night, she's on my legs, and if I get up to go to the bathroom the second I get back she goes back on them with some irritation at being disturbed.
It's really very lovely. The problem is that the other cats do not care to have THEIR snuggle routines on my bed and I feel guilty a lot.
posted by jeather at 9:03 AM on February 26, 2019 [2 favorites]
It's really very lovely. The problem is that the other cats do not care to have THEIR snuggle routines on my bed and I feel guilty a lot.
posted by jeather at 9:03 AM on February 26, 2019 [2 favorites]
There are only two animals who kill for pleasure: man and cats.
posted by slogger at 10:15 AM on February 26, 2019
posted by slogger at 10:15 AM on February 26, 2019
And possibly dolphins
posted by stillnocturnal at 10:22 AM on February 26, 2019
posted by stillnocturnal at 10:22 AM on February 26, 2019
In defense of cats - My cat "talks" constantly to express her needs. And she is very needy. She also ( I say she doesn't give a shit sometimes, but she does) sits by my dog's water bowl and will meow and cry until I pour water in it if it is empty. Then she will walk away happy. My dog, however, refuses to drink from the same bowl. He came around the corner and saw her once drinking from it, walked away, and never drank out of it again. I had to buy a new water bowl just for him and place it away from hers ( his old one) before he would even approach it. She also wakes me up every morning when the alarm goes off. She hates for me to be late for work. :)
posted by bradth27 at 10:26 AM on February 26, 2019
posted by bradth27 at 10:26 AM on February 26, 2019
as for animals killing for pleasure - Killer Whales will play with seals all the time, flipping them back and forth and playing with them before eating them. Lots of animals kill and we have no idea why. And holy crap, feral hogs! I hunt regularly, but never for hogs intentionally. I have seen acres of land destroyed by hogs - thousands of acres. And they will kill anything in their path. from rabbits to deer, for no reason other than to kill.
posted by bradth27 at 10:32 AM on February 26, 2019 [2 favorites]
posted by bradth27 at 10:32 AM on February 26, 2019 [2 favorites]
There are only two animals who kill for pleasure
As a counter example only because we're playing by simple dualism rules here, dogs do so as well. One of the big problems in sheep country are domesticated dogs that kill sheep.
The more that is learned about animal behaviour, the more commonalities we find. Many predators will engage in play behaviours, often with live prey, and not all of it is related to their immediate need for food.
posted by bonehead at 10:34 AM on February 26, 2019
As a counter example only because we're playing by simple dualism rules here, dogs do so as well. One of the big problems in sheep country are domesticated dogs that kill sheep.
The more that is learned about animal behaviour, the more commonalities we find. Many predators will engage in play behaviours, often with live prey, and not all of it is related to their immediate need for food.
posted by bonehead at 10:34 AM on February 26, 2019
Sure there’s resting cat face, but people tend to ask me what’s wrong when I’m wearing a neutral face, too. I can only aspire to the blissed-out face my cat gets when he’s laying on top of a heating vent and I’m scratching his lower back, though. I’ve never felt half as happy as he looks.
posted by jeweled accumulation at 11:55 AM on February 26, 2019 [2 favorites]
posted by jeweled accumulation at 11:55 AM on February 26, 2019 [2 favorites]
I prefer to think of it as a self-reinforcing adaptive pathway in which everybody wins. The cat gets a good game and easy meat, while the mouse gets a few brief moments of joyous dangerous living, possibly finding more mice to mate with before being cruelly put to death by the cat.
Peter Chiykowski wrote a short short story, strung up as a framework between two proverbs, that is both tangentially apropos and basically awesome :
Peter Chiykowski wrote a short short story, strung up as a framework between two proverbs, that is both tangentially apropos and basically awesome :
When the cat is away, the mice will play, dressing up in calico and claws and performing pantomimes of the beast that has preyed upon their families for generations.posted by ricochet biscuit at 2:54 PM on February 26, 2019 [5 favorites]
They laugh and cry, taking turns playing the monster or the hero that slays it, but as they jape they begin to wonder: if we can kill this creature in jest, can we kill it in earnest?
Their play takes on new forms — imagining traps and tricks, a war-beast of their own built from cogs and levers, one thousand mock deaths for this creature that only yesterday was invincible.
And when the cat returns, it finds the rules have changed. The mice have forgotten their fear and remembered something else:
The curiosity that kills the cat need not be its own.
According to the Society for the Study of Psychopathy, psychopath traits include:
Lack of guilt/remorse
Lack of empathy
Lack of deep emotional attachments
Narcissism
Superficial charm
Dishonesty
Manipulativeness
Reckless risk-taking
This pretty much perfectly describes my cat. And she is adorable.
posted by srboisvert at 3:47 PM on February 26, 2019 [2 favorites]
Lack of guilt/remorse
Lack of empathy
Lack of deep emotional attachments
Narcissism
Superficial charm
Dishonesty
Manipulativeness
Reckless risk-taking
This pretty much perfectly describes my cat. And she is adorable.
posted by srboisvert at 3:47 PM on February 26, 2019 [2 favorites]
Just a moment ago, I had to convince our large, not bright, weirdly affectionate younger cat to get off my lap so I could catch a train. She never really takes the hint, so you kind of need to remove the possibility of a lap out from under her.
We have a working theory on her odd, un-catlike behavior: she thinks she’s a dog. When we got our cat, the next door neighbor had three dogs (all since passed, they were already old when we moved in). In good weather, we’d have the sliding doors open, and our cat would sit behind the screen and make weird croaking noises, noises I’ve rarely ever heard a cat make. And we began to understand that she only made those noises when the dogs were out in their yard. She was trying to mimic their bark and communicate. Because she thinks she’s a dog.
It took a while for us to understand that what we thought of as a dumb cat was actually a very confused dog of above average intelligence, trapped in a cats body.
Of course, that just goes to show smart dog < dumb cat.
posted by Ghidorah at 11:19 PM on February 26, 2019 [4 favorites]
We have a working theory on her odd, un-catlike behavior: she thinks she’s a dog. When we got our cat, the next door neighbor had three dogs (all since passed, they were already old when we moved in). In good weather, we’d have the sliding doors open, and our cat would sit behind the screen and make weird croaking noises, noises I’ve rarely ever heard a cat make. And we began to understand that she only made those noises when the dogs were out in their yard. She was trying to mimic their bark and communicate. Because she thinks she’s a dog.
It took a while for us to understand that what we thought of as a dumb cat was actually a very confused dog of above average intelligence, trapped in a cats body.
Of course, that just goes to show smart dog < dumb cat.
posted by Ghidorah at 11:19 PM on February 26, 2019 [4 favorites]
I mean, you poke a cat, I imagine it has the good sense to run away and hide instead of wailing loudly, waiting 30 seconds and poking his brother back, who then slugs the original pokee which of course escalates into a bilateral free for all ...
@Slarty Bartfest -- I laughed because this portrayal of your offspring also resembles the feline dynamics in my house. Cats A & B will startle each other (or A pokes B with no reason), hissing ensues, then B takes it out on C who had the misfortune to cross B's field of view. For (4 choose 3) permutations of A,B,C. I'm just relieved that cat A now has targets other than me for random violence!
posted by Metasyntactic at 11:57 PM on February 26, 2019
@Slarty Bartfest -- I laughed because this portrayal of your offspring also resembles the feline dynamics in my house. Cats A & B will startle each other (or A pokes B with no reason), hissing ensues, then B takes it out on C who had the misfortune to cross B's field of view. For (4 choose 3) permutations of A,B,C. I'm just relieved that cat A now has targets other than me for random violence!
posted by Metasyntactic at 11:57 PM on February 26, 2019
MetaFilter: A pokes B with no reason
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 4:26 PM on February 27, 2019 [2 favorites]
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 4:26 PM on February 27, 2019 [2 favorites]
Of the seven cats I've lived with over the years, four have definitely not been psychos, and the thing they all had in common was that they'd lived for some time as strays before we gave them a home. Their behavior was more stereotypically doglike (affectionate, teachable, protective) than how people usually describe cats. Hell, one of them saved my ass from a psychotic doberman when I was a toddler. Cats who've had to survive on their own often appreciate their new litters.
posted by homunculus at 10:00 PM on March 7, 2019 [1 favorite]
posted by homunculus at 10:00 PM on March 7, 2019 [1 favorite]
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posted by Homo neanderthalensis at 4:55 PM on February 25, 2019 [1 favorite]