Candy Williams and Jackie Ferris, v. John M. Lester, Jr. et al.

August 2, 2023 12:13 PM

Dear Counsel: Scientists have found that the octopus is bizarrely adept at navigating mazes. [PDF]
posted by brundlefly (11 comments total)

I thought this would be way more octopus focused.
posted by an octopus IRL at 12:26 PM on August 2, 2023 [10 favorites]

"The parties here were arms-length counterparties in a contract for services"

A real missed opportunity for an 8 arms joke, there.
posted by jedicus at 12:39 PM on August 2, 2023 [2 favorites]

The backstory.

Plaintiff produced to Defendant a United States of America Passport Card for Ayman Bekheit, what appears to be a resumé, and a letter from the Chi Chi Rodriguez Youth Foundation, Inc. dated July 7, 2003.7 None of these documents comply with the Court’s Order, nor do they prove that Ayman Bekheit is a licensed, certified public accountant.
posted by snuffleupagus at 1:39 PM on August 2, 2023

I guess Better Call Saul hasn't prepared me to fully appreciate what's going on here. ELIANAL?
posted by mpark at 1:39 PM on August 2, 2023

Just a particularly ocean-fresh benchslap from the inimitable Vice Chancellor Glasscock.

Of an attorney who had been admitted temporarily from another jurisdiction for the litigation of the matter, withdrew after losing a motion in which he managed to piss off the Court royally, and still thought it wise to take a parting shot after being excused.
posted by snuffleupagus at 1:41 PM on August 2, 2023

I guess those who litigate with Glasscock shouldn’t throw stones.

I’m sorry.
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln at 2:02 PM on August 2, 2023 [6 favorites]

When you tangle with Glasscock, you get the octopus.
posted by Schadenfreude at 2:35 PM on August 2, 2023 [2 favorites]

Another absolute banger of an opening from Vice Chancellor Glasscock

Dear Counsel:
The Labyrinth built by Dedalus on Crete was easy enough to enter, but near impossible to navigate through—it was sufficiently baffling to detain the Minotaur. Chancery litigation, in a sense, is the opposite. It is not difficult to traverse — indeed, sometimes matters are resolved with great alacrity—but the entrance is straitened. Famously, three gates lead into the Chancery labyrinth, statutory jurisdiction and the two traditional entrances: via pleading an equitable cause of action or requesting equitable relief
posted by inflatablekiwi at 2:42 PM on August 2, 2023 [5 favorites]

²See, e.g., Giant Maze Experiment – Octopus VS Big Water Labyrinth, OctolabTV
posted by BungaDunga at 7:28 PM on August 2, 2023

I struggle with the tone of these and other similar decisions. It's one of the things that really turns me off of Delaware law. It reads to me like the judge is gratuitously humiliating the lawyers on the losing side, which I find distasteful. And it also strikes me as pretty smug. I prefer a more plain and direct approach.
posted by prefpara at 7:50 PM on August 2, 2023 [1 favorite]

I tend to agree, whether it's the Delaware Country Club Chancery, or cranky USDC judges, etc. That said; the attorney in this case really did seem to be inviting it. Glasscock's shtick doesn't seem to be reserved for dunking on people, he's just unabashed about shoehorning literary references into his opinion letters. One of the tweets about this most recent one called him a 'frustrated English major.'
posted by snuffleupagus at 10:44 AM on August 3, 2023 [2 favorites]