Cat puts human to sleep.
December 19, 2011 7:14 AM   Subscribe

Cat soothes crying baby It's a cat. Soothing a crying baby. It's practically designed to go viral.
posted by ironjelly (81 comments total) 21 users marked this as a favorite
 
Apart from the 'crying baby' bit.
posted by ironjelly at 7:15 AM on December 19, 2011


I like the cat's "I caught it, so I get to eat it, right?" look at the end.
posted by chavenet at 7:17 AM on December 19, 2011 [19 favorites]


How do infants work? No, seriously, how do they work? They try all the time and pretty much anything from white noise to Korean fans to cats can sooth them. I just can't grok the randomness. Someone hook up us with the API docs because the source code comments are non-existing.
posted by Foci for Analysis at 7:19 AM on December 19, 2011 [13 favorites]


Hi, baby. I regularly walk around in a box of my own poop. Here, let me rub my paw on your face.
posted by phunniemee at 7:20 AM on December 19, 2011 [48 favorites]


The cat is only doing that so it can steal the baby's breath while the baby sleeping.
posted by Horace Rumpole at 7:21 AM on December 19, 2011 [24 favorites]


The cat reminds me of nothing so much as a faith healer. LAY ON THE PAWS! BE HEALED! Or alternatively he's exercising some kind of mind control straight out of every sci-fi movie ever.

(Really though, I feel like this is the real difference between cats and dogs. Crying baby? Cat pokes and prods and bats at it, all, "What is this and can I make it squirm and then eat it?" With dogs, it's, crying baby? "Let me express solidarity and let it know that its pack is here to take care of it!")
posted by WidgetAlley at 7:21 AM on December 19, 2011 [8 favorites]


My cat just heard the baby crying and came over to whack the screen. Friggin baby crying while she was trying to sleep.
posted by JohnnyGunn at 7:22 AM on December 19, 2011 [3 favorites]


The cat is actually performing a mind meld here.
posted by Grimgrin at 7:22 AM on December 19, 2011 [8 favorites]


We have a look-alike of that cat, and he is equally "manual" with his paws. Constantly reaching out and just...touching stuff.

We call it him using his tentacles, because he seems to be able to extend unnaturally far to rest his claws gently on my nose.
posted by everichon at 7:22 AM on December 19, 2011 [3 favorites]


My cats were like, "Hm, you have brought home a new human. It smells interesting, and it is very small. It sits still a lot, so probably we could snuggle -- OH GOD IT'S NOISY! THE NOISE! OH GOD! RETREAT! HIDE UNDER THE COUCH FOR FIVE MONTHS! WE MAY HAVE TO ABANDON THE FOOD BOWLS!"
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 7:25 AM on December 19, 2011 [37 favorites]


Cat uses special appendage to siphon away the life force of invasive life-form.
posted by Wolfdog at 7:26 AM on December 19, 2011 [6 favorites]


I'll be really impressed when the cat changes a diaper or two. Until then, it is all smoke and mirrors.
posted by JohnnyGunn at 7:26 AM on December 19, 2011 [7 favorites]


Looks like it's just poking at it. Maybe the baby was upset about being poked but just got over it.
posted by delmoi at 7:27 AM on December 19, 2011


And once again we see the transmission of Toxoplasma gondii in action.
posted by Bunny Ultramod at 7:28 AM on December 19, 2011 [21 favorites]


I liked the part with the cat.
posted by Zed at 7:30 AM on December 19, 2011 [5 favorites]


Is it asleep?...really asleep?... OK ... Look around - attention elsewhere?... Good ... CLAWS! STRIKE! RUN RUN RUN!... That's for the diamanté collar, monkeys!

Every time.
posted by cromagnon at 7:30 AM on December 19, 2011 [2 favorites]


Love the comments:

"Reinforces my belief that cats are little "Angels" sent here to watch over our spirits"

No, they're just FUCKING CATS. Clever, resourceful little chaps but I wouldn't have one in the house. And there's no wrath like the wrath of cat loons, is there.
posted by GallonOfAlan at 7:30 AM on December 19, 2011 [2 favorites]


I have a heart of stone, because I saw a very pretty cat (with a silly collar) gently and tiredly batting a baby in the face until it shut up. Then it looked around at the camera to say "If you'd bugger off I could have hit it properly and have sorted that noise out in half the time, dammit".
posted by Brockles at 7:30 AM on December 19, 2011 [22 favorites]


Looks like it's just poking at it. Maybe the baby was upset about being poked but just got over it.

Baby needs to change her/his privacy settings.
posted by Foci for Analysis at 7:31 AM on December 19, 2011 [7 favorites]


Wow, we are seeing a nascent feline video which will soon grow to have far more "likes" than views. There's something very soothiZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
posted by obscurator at 7:32 AM on December 19, 2011


If that were my cat, and my baby, there is no way on God's green earth I would ever leave them together unsupervised.

"Soothes"? Bull. "Investigates edibility of", more like.
posted by flabdablet at 7:33 AM on December 19, 2011 [17 favorites]


And did you notice at 0:57 where the cat takes a quick taste? Hmmm? That cat has evil on his/her mind.
posted by Runes at 7:33 AM on December 19, 2011 [6 favorites]


Is that general cat behavior for "soothing", or absentmindedly playing with food / a toy?
posted by naju at 7:34 AM on December 19, 2011 [1 favorite]


(b).
posted by flabdablet at 7:35 AM on December 19, 2011 [1 favorite]


Yeah, (b).
posted by everichon at 7:36 AM on December 19, 2011 [1 favorite]


"Reinforces my belief that cats are little "Angels" sent here to watch over our spirits"

Because when you die, getting there first means juicy arm skin.
posted by jimmythefish at 7:38 AM on December 19, 2011 [7 favorites]


*Contents may differ from description on tin.
posted by swift at 7:40 AM on December 19, 2011


I used to have a cat that did that paw-resting-on-face thing. But in her case, it was less 'let me soothe you to sleep, dear companion!' and more 'listen, pal - if you move a muscle while I'm snuggled up nice and warm, these claws are going to make you regret it.'
posted by Catseye at 7:40 AM on December 19, 2011 [5 favorites]


"The heads have a soft spot for easy access somewhere around here..."
posted by benzenedream at 7:40 AM on December 19, 2011 [5 favorites]


If the large hairless one was not here, I would eat this loud thing.
posted by dirtdirt at 7:42 AM on December 19, 2011 [8 favorites]


That looked a lot more like the clawed hand in the velvet glove making it clear to the baby that if it didn't shut up and pronto, the claws would give it something to really cry about.
posted by toodleydoodley at 7:46 AM on December 19, 2011 [6 favorites]


Aww.

I am, however, tempted to take a screencap of the toothiest part of the cat yawn at 0:53 for maximum "I WILL EAT YOU" visuals.
posted by rmd1023 at 7:47 AM on December 19, 2011 [2 favorites]


"So... how'd you lose the eye? You say it happened when you were a baby?"
posted by Lentrohamsanin at 7:58 AM on December 19, 2011 [4 favorites]


Our cat Spike (who looks just like this one) would probably do the exact same thing. He is a master of the "tentacle" approach everichon references. Usually gently, but sometimes more of a "I am going to try to open your mouth by pulling on your lip [owwwww]"...
posted by bitter-girl.com at 8:02 AM on December 19, 2011 [1 favorite]


"There, there...this will all be over in a second. Shh...it won't hurt...oh, hello tall one...I was just soothing your child."
posted by davebush at 8:10 AM on December 19, 2011 [6 favorites]


I've seen my own use essentially the same action for "soothing" mice.
posted by flabdablet at 8:11 AM on December 19, 2011 [6 favorites]


I saw it as the cat saying "OMG THIS LOUD THING HAS TO STOP RIGHT NOW OH WAIT IF I USE THE CLAWS I'LL BE IN BIG TROUBLE ARGH WHAT DO I DO"
posted by Melismata at 8:12 AM on December 19, 2011


We have a look-alike of that cat, and he is equally "manual" with his paws. Constantly reaching out and just...touching stuff.

Obligatory.
posted by Inspector.Gadget at 8:14 AM on December 19, 2011 [2 favorites]


Is that general cat behavior for "soothing", or absentmindedly playing with food / a toy?
posted by naju at 10:34 AM on December 19 [+] [!]

(b).
posted by flabdablet at 10:35 AM on December 19 [+] [!]


As a lifelong cat owner, I might have said B about the paw poking as well if it hadn't been for the lick on the forehead, which is what cats do when they want to soothe. You know, as in grooming other cats. When cats imprint on people, they do this to people the way they would to cats they like. So, fun to snark, but no.

Also, you toxoplasma conspiracy theory people, you can block the cat mind control effects with tin foil hats, you know.
posted by aught at 8:17 AM on December 19, 2011 [9 favorites]


It's perfectly obvious what the cat is doing.

Like any of us faced with a thing making a loud noise: it is looking for the paws button.
posted by MuffinMan at 8:19 AM on December 19, 2011 [19 favorites]


Aww. Wookit da wittle favewits howe.

Kidding. This video was cute.
posted by Night_owl at 8:30 AM on December 19, 2011


"SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!"
posted by Gilbert at 8:39 AM on December 19, 2011


With dogs, it's, crying baby? "Let me express solidarity and let it know that its pack is here to take care of it!"

Bonus: rubber chicken.
posted by dirigibleman at 8:42 AM on December 19, 2011


That cat was soothing that baby the way a cat "soothes" a lackadaisically held laser pointer. Had the baby mustered a last-minute burst of energy before falling asleep, the soothing would have involved long bloody scratches.
posted by Max Udargo at 8:43 AM on December 19, 2011


I could not enjoy this video because I just kept thinking I would not do this with MY baby (much as I love my cats.) There were too many ways in which it could go badly.

I did, however, love the dog singing videos. So there is that.
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 8:46 AM on December 19, 2011 [1 favorite]


Cute dog beats up cute baby.
posted by Navelgazer at 8:53 AM on December 19, 2011 [1 favorite]


Speaking as someone who's about to have a baby any day now and has two cats, this video does nothing but strike fear and panic in my heart. I've actually had daynightmares about the cats jumping into the baby's bassinet while he's in it (or at all). Holy crap, if my cats even TOUCHED my baby I would flip my shit.
posted by litnerd at 8:56 AM on December 19, 2011 [1 favorite]


Oh calm down people. My husband's parents had a cat that sat by his cradle and rocked it when he cried. Babies are way too big to finish eating before they go bad, and sometimes you just have to do what you can to make the Waaaaaah! stop.
posted by toodleydoodley at 9:00 AM on December 19, 2011 [6 favorites]


When Boy was a baby, we had the white version of this cat, and she would chirp at him when he cried. Also, brought him a snake to play with. The other cats wanted nothing at all to do with a human that couldn't open cans.
posted by dejah420 at 9:00 AM on December 19, 2011 [3 favorites]


I had an orange tabby that absolutely ADORED my daughter from the day we brought her home. He'd try to curl up with her in her crib & sleep with her, & when she cried, he'd pace at the foot of the crib & yowl until one of us came to do something about it. When she was up & crawling around after a few months, he'd let her climb all over him, & just purr the whole time. I think he was just really happy to have a human his own size around, & he was very protective of her.
posted by Devils Rancher at 9:29 AM on December 19, 2011 [15 favorites]


I'm not fooled. Our cat does the same thing to us in the morning. It's the "hey, hey, it's time for me to eat" poke.
posted by Metroid Baby at 9:32 AM on December 19, 2011


Aw, a cat smacking a crying baby in the head! In other news, I'm going to stay on birth control and acquire more cats.
posted by autoclavicle at 9:35 AM on December 19, 2011 [9 favorites]


Did anyone else notice the quick moment at 0:56 where it bares its fangs for a bite and then remembers the hairless ape is right there?
posted by Blasdelb at 9:37 AM on December 19, 2011 [3 favorites]


Preferable.
posted by Decani at 9:39 AM on December 19, 2011 [3 favorites]


It will clearly be punished soon for breaking the Masquerade.
posted by interstitial at 9:43 AM on December 19, 2011


When I was in college, I wound up hand raising a tiny little black, half-Siamese cat. He grew into a curious and hilarious fella who liked to "talk" and he had a habit of petting people. Schiller was five years old when Elder Monster was born, and he laid claim to Elder Monster the moment I brought the kiddo home from the hospital.

If Elder Monster cried, Schiller was right there to pet him. When Elder Monster napped, Schiller stood guard. When Elder Monster became mobile, Schiller patiently let kiddo crawl all over him. He put up with slobber on his ears, pulls to his tail, gleeful squealing right up in his face. When Elder Monster went to school, Schiller figured out when he was due to get home, and would wait at the door for him. Elder Monster was his bestie, they were completely inseparable. I would tease Elder Monster about stealing my cat. Schiller continued being Elder Monster's constant companion right up until the day he died at the age of 20. None of our other cats have ever been that awesome.
posted by MissySedai at 9:46 AM on December 19, 2011 [21 favorites]


1) Cat is peeved that prey has been alerted and is issuing distress sounds.
2) Cat feels around for the fontanelle.
3) Cat applies pressure directly to the brain, enacting a nerve block and pacifying the prey.
4) Cat stares at the camera, silently waiting for the witnesses to leave.
posted by FatherDagon at 9:50 AM on December 19, 2011 [3 favorites]


Hmmm, litnerd. Not to freak you out with anecdotes, but... When my nephew was a baby, his favorite pacifier was often the cat's ear. Poor kitty* took it like a champ, every time.

* Named, Einstein. As in, "Oh, good job, Einstein, how did you get your head wedged in there for the 100th time, you know it's too large to fit." Though in the case of "there" being "the baby's mouth," I suppose he was not to blame for once.
posted by Wossname at 9:54 AM on December 19, 2011


I love the "there, I fixed it for you" look at the end.
posted by Leezie at 9:55 AM on December 19, 2011 [3 favorites]


Also, the video is precisely how my elder tomcat wakes me UP in the morning. Only, the claws are just sliiightly extended. Just enough to let me know that hitting "snooze" is not in my best interests.
posted by Wossname at 9:57 AM on December 19, 2011


As Seen On:
Rage3D Discussion Area

posted by Flashman at 9:58 AM on December 19, 2011


Now, we'll begin by cutting through the skull just... here.
posted by Naberius at 10:02 AM on December 19, 2011 [1 favorite]


AS someone who's gotten a lot of time put in living with cats, i can say it looks like this cat was actaully trying to quiet the baby. If it wanted to truly bat at it, it would have smacked it.

If I feign a sound of pain or distress, I can get both my cats to come running to me, both with a "What's wrong?" look on their faces. Once a cat thinks of your as theirs, your distress is theirs.

Unless you have an asshole cat.
posted by grubi at 10:05 AM on December 19, 2011 [3 favorites]


Hi, baby. I regularly walk around in a box of my own poop.

The difference between dogs and cats is cats have the deceny to try and bury it first.
posted by eriko at 10:26 AM on December 19, 2011 [2 favorites]


The difference between dogs and cats is cats have the deceny to try and bury it first.

The difference between dogs and cats is that people think that cats are cleaner because they have the decency to bury their crap. Dogs just roll around in it. The truth is, both animals are playing with poop, but only one of them is honest about it.
posted by phunniemee at 10:34 AM on December 19, 2011 [2 favorites]


cats have the deceny to try and bury it first.
What, babies? Must have missed that...
posted by Namlit at 10:39 AM on December 19, 2011


The difference between dogs and cats is cats have the deceny to try and bury it first.

Another difference is that dogs will dig up the cat shit and eat it.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 10:40 AM on December 19, 2011 [6 favorites]


The difference between dogs and cats is that people think that cats are cleaner because they have the decency to bury their crap. Dogs just roll around in it. The truth is, both animals are playing with poop, but only one of them is honest about it.

That is the weirdest pro-dog argument I've ever seen.
posted by grubi at 10:42 AM on December 19, 2011 [2 favorites]


That is the weirdest pro-dog argument I've ever seen.

I don't understand dog vs. cat arguments. I have two of each, and the best part of my day is when I stand up in the afternoon, stretch, remark that I'm tired and want a nap, and have all four of them pile into bed with me for an hour-long snooze. They seem to be equal opportunity feet warmers.
posted by MissySedai at 11:00 AM on December 19, 2011 [3 favorites]


Of course, if you've read "Space-Time for Springers" you understand what just happened in an entirely different way.

Poor Gummitch.
posted by Redag at 11:19 AM on December 19, 2011 [1 favorite]


Another difference is that dogs will dig up the cat shit and eat it.

And an even more bizarre aspect is a dog who has just eaten up all the cat shit in the litter pan acts like it has scored some serious points on the cats by having done so.
posted by aught at 11:31 AM on December 19, 2011


Yeah, we have to block off our cat litter box, because otherwise the dogs will have BUFFET OF CAT POOP.

And there is nothing worse in all the world then seeing Molly run up from the basement, chomping happily on what must be a nice, crusty piece of cat shit.

The smell and the horror.

The horror.
posted by kbanas at 11:46 AM on December 19, 2011 [2 favorites]


Aw. That kitty looks like my Malcolm, complete with the contemptuous look at the end.
posted by Ruthless Bunny at 12:12 PM on December 19, 2011


Desmond Morris' weird but fun Catwatching theorizes that cats view humans as both parent and child. We're parents to them when they're curled up beside us, digging their claws into their legs. It's regressing to childhood and pretends it's nursing. (That's right, your thigh is now a teat.) When the cat gives you a dead mouse, it's now the parent and wants to teach you how to hunt. Because you're obviously not the one doing any work around here, you're not seen batting a dead mouse around all the time like you should.

The cat in this case to me looks like it's going into cranky parent mode. Cats hate babies crying and this one is amazingly tolerant of the noise. I had a lookalike cat as well and she'd have been hiding behind the dryer the moment that baby came into the house. Even so, Stewie (I didn't read the comments but I'm guessing it's a she) is now acting as the mama cat. The paw on the head, as others have noted, is a gentle but firm paw, saying "I'd like you to stop please." The lunging and then licking says "I mean it!" Just as the threat of Dad's hand reaching us in the back seat was enough to keep us quiet on car trips.

Stewie is a very affectionate cat despite the aggressive movements, because the movements are done in trust. Stewie trusts the baby enough to know it won't try to hurt her, and she does not try to harm the baby in return. I couldn't tell you what the baby's thinking but Stewie seems familiar enough that her presence is tolerated, even when the batting isn't. I think that kid is going to grow up being kind to animals.
posted by Spatch at 12:19 PM on December 19, 2011 [2 favorites]


Oh, and the look towards the camera at the end is saying "Your turn." Stewie has other things to do.
posted by Spatch at 12:20 PM on December 19, 2011 [1 favorite]


Licking as a form of affection? Not from any cat I've known.. it's always been step two on the "no, really" scale, immediately prior to a fanging.
posted by coriolisdave at 2:56 PM on December 19, 2011 [1 favorite]


People often say that cats are substitute babies. Then I look at videos of both cats and babies, and I'm only interested in the cats, so I understand that this is nonsense.
posted by Summer at 3:12 PM on December 19, 2011 [2 favorites]


I had a tom cat that was a patter - he'd often pat my face if it was in reach, and his two offspring kittens I now have do the same thing. Most mornings I wake up with both young cats curled up next to me, patting face or arms, purring madly.
posted by thylacinthine at 3:55 PM on December 19, 2011


That is very cute, but yeah, cat feet on baby's face or hands is not a great idea.
posted by LobsterMitten at 5:04 PM on December 19, 2011 [1 favorite]


I had an orange tabby that absolutely ADORED my daughter from the day we brought her home. He'd try to curl up with her in her crib & sleep with her, & when she cried, he'd pace at the foot of the crib & yowl until one of us came to do something about it. When she was up & crawling around after a few months, he'd let her climb all over him, & just purr the whole time. I think he was just really happy to have a human his own size around, & he was very protective of her.

Heh. We had an orange tabby when I was a child, a stray tom cat who'd taken a liking to my dad and moved in with him years earlier. When my mother was pregnant with me and I would kick, he'd curl up against her belly and purr to settle me down. When I was an infant he patiently allowed me to climb all over him, pull on him and generally manhandle him, too. And he was protective: he was gentle with our other pets (two dogs, a mother and son, and another cat, who as a kitten had been nursed by the mother dog alongside her puppy), but other dogs were not welcome. One day when I was outside with a neighbor who was baby sitting, an aggressive local dog got out of his yard and made the mistake of threatening us, only to find a ball of furry orange fury on his back, clawing at his head and riding him down the street like a cowboy as the dog tried to escape. At least that's the story the neighbor told my parents (I was too young to remember), but the cat had a reputation for ambushing dogs who wandered too close to our house.

That cat was great.
posted by homunculus at 1:00 AM on December 20, 2011 [8 favorites]


coriolisdave: "Licking as a form of affection? Not from any cat I've known.. it's always been step two on the "no, really" scale, immediately prior to a fanging."

Huh, some of mine do it. Licking is a grooming thing.
posted by Karmakaze at 10:33 AM on December 21, 2011


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