Sad Chili Cheese Nachos

October 31, 2013 4:00 PM

"my friend told me to watch this cooking video while listening to sad music. so i mixed a little something for you all" Hello Wildcats. Chef Steven Reed shows us how to cook chili cheese nachos in the microwave. Additionally, spaghetti, creamed corn and potatoes, and Rice-a-Roni.
posted by BeBoth (23 comments total)

The long, silent shot of the front of the microwave was particularly poignant.
posted by brundlefly at 4:07 PM on October 31, 2013 [1 favorite]

Sad Chili Cheese Nachos

Redundant
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 4:18 PM on October 31, 2013 [1 favorite]

This is just so wonderful.

I have a feeling this is William Sanderson's character Larry from Newhart, years after his brother Darryl and his other brother Darryl passed away, and all he's left with is his microwave and a video camera.
posted by Celsius1414 at 4:21 PM on October 31, 2013 [4 favorites]

And at the other end of the scale...
posted by Drexen at 4:22 PM on October 31, 2013 [1 favorite]

It's Friday night at Helmutdog's house....

What's particulary genuis is that he doesn't even bother fully mixing the cheeze sauce and the canned chili. It's for realz, man!
posted by helmutdog at 4:27 PM on October 31, 2013

I could have sworn we mocked the hell out of Steven Reed before on Metafilter, but for the life of me I can't find a previously.
posted by BrotherCaine at 4:29 PM on October 31, 2013 [1 favorite]

Who eats corn on mashed potatoes anyways? Peas, maybe...
posted by maggieb at 4:35 PM on October 31, 2013

This reminded me of a live version of the Microwave Cooking for One book.
posted by thorny at 4:35 PM on October 31, 2013

Protip: Go to 7-11, get a bag of Fritos (the $1.49 bag will do, don't go crazy here). The chili and cheese for their nachos/hot dogs is free, so after you've purchased your Fritos, open the bag, go to the chili/cheese dispenser, but the bag under one of the nozzles and push the buttons until you're satisfied. Bam! Saddest chili cheese nachos ever. Bonus points for starting out with chili cheese fritos.
posted by LionIndex at 4:41 PM on October 31, 2013 [5 favorites]

*watches creamed corn video*

THAT MAN HAS HANDS OF ASBESTOS!
posted by lattiboy at 4:43 PM on October 31, 2013 [2 favorites]

Also sad: Mr Reed is a convicted sex offender. (Via Gawker)
posted by embrangled at 4:46 PM on October 31, 2013 [1 favorite]

Whenever I see things like this that are obviously done in a professional way (multiple cameras, good lighting), all I can think of is the group of professionals being made to record and edit this. People who went to school and studied art.
posted by lattiboy at 4:48 PM on October 31, 2013 [2 favorites]

Wow, that is genius, he microwaves the jar. I'd have wasted a paper bowl on that.
posted by Ad hominem at 5:11 PM on October 31, 2013

Yeah, you motherfuckers will all be laughing your goddamn asses off when you're in your 70s and your food choices will be microwave spaghetti or cat food.
posted by NoMich at 5:22 PM on October 31, 2013 [1 favorite]

"The chili and cheese for their nachos/hot dogs is free..." ...if you've made a purchase of nachos/hotdogs?
posted by Captain Chesapeake at 5:23 PM on October 31, 2013 [1 favorite]

gar-mon-bo-zia
posted by oonh at 5:36 PM on October 31, 2013 [2 favorites]

If his spirits are still low by lunchtime, Mendic said that he can always count on the simple task of preparing himself a tasty meal to help shake off the blues. His self-proclaimed "house specialty" is nachos.

"I only make them a couple times a month as a treat, so they'll still seem special," said Mendic, arranging a layer of tortilla chips on a paper plate, then taking a Kraft single, carefully tearing it into sad little strips, and sprinkling it onto the chips as if it were shredded cheddar and not an individually wrapped slice of American cheese. "They taste real good, and only use up like one or two singles, so there's always enough for the next nacho time."

-Area Man Has Sad Little Routine For When He Needs Cheering Up
posted by The White Hat at 5:37 PM on October 31, 2013 [5 favorites]

Area Man Has Sad Little Routine For When He Needs Cheering Up

No no no god damn you, you do NOT post that Onion article! You do NOT post that!
posted by 235w103 at 8:29 PM on October 31, 2013 [2 favorites]

Mission tortilla strips are the business, this guy knows what he's doing.
posted by turbid dahlia at 2:34 AM on November 1, 2013

I have been doing it wrong...
posted by shockingbluamp at 2:17 PM on November 1, 2013

When he tore the side of that bag of tortillas, I nearly cried.
posted by orme at 5:38 PM on November 1, 2013 [1 favorite]

This video is a sad delight. Some folks have used some other sad music: Stars of the Lid's Another Ballad for Heavy Lids, Gary Jules's Mad World, Samuel Barber's Adagio for Strings. There's also a version of the creamed corn video with some Erik Satie.
posted by Going To Maine at 7:36 PM on November 12, 2013

Oops. Stars of the Lid version is here.
posted by Going To Maine at 7:26 AM on November 13, 2013