I've fallen, and I can't get up!

October 18, 2014 4:25 AM

Tiny little people charge enthusiastically into the breach. The tiny, shiny rectangular spinning breach. No tiny little people were harmed in the making of this video. I think.
posted by ardgedee (52 comments total)

As 3D modeling skill improves, the distinction between fake people and dumb people becomes more difficult to tell.
posted by oceanjesse at 5:14 AM on October 18, 2014 [13 favorites]

Reminds me of some of the scenes in World War Z.
posted by stinkfoot at 5:21 AM on October 18, 2014

(The spilling humanity, not the fact that its a total disaster)
posted by stinkfoot at 5:21 AM on October 18, 2014 [1 favorite]

At least one of those people was Waldo, I'm pretty sure.
posted by louche mustachio at 5:29 AM on October 18, 2014 [5 favorites]

Real life version.
posted by hydrophonic at 5:38 AM on October 18, 2014 [18 favorites]

That's utterly nightmarish!
posted by howfar at 5:58 AM on October 18, 2014 [2 favorites]

> As 3D modeling skill improves, the distinction between fake people and dumb people becomes more difficult to tell.

I think that's a corollary to Poe's Law:

Without a blatant display of humor, it is impossible to create a parody of extremism or fundamentalism that someone won't mistake for the real thing.

posted by benito.strauss at 6:12 AM on October 18, 2014

Worst kinetic public sculpture ever
posted by oulipian at 6:18 AM on October 18, 2014 [12 favorites]

Where can I find plans to build one of those spinning rectangles?
posted by orme at 6:27 AM on October 18, 2014 [1 favorite]

There's Waldo! No, there's Waldo!
posted by arcticseal at 6:42 AM on October 18, 2014

All I could think was that somebody has an issue with fans of the Wisconsin Badgers.
posted by symbioid at 6:46 AM on October 18, 2014

Unsurprisingly, my cat was fascinated. A) because circular movement, B) because, "haha, tiny people, I will crush them," and C) because he could sit between me and the screen, keeping me from seeing the video.
posted by GenjiandProust at 6:56 AM on October 18, 2014 [8 favorites]

little toy people, where is your claw now?
posted by pyramid termite at 7:11 AM on October 18, 2014 [2 favorites]

Reminds me of some of the scenes in World War Z.

Seems like that's not coincidental.

It's really impressive, but they really need to work on the anti-turtle-ness of humans, though. Every single character falls over and literally can't get up.
posted by pjenks at 7:36 AM on October 18, 2014 [2 favorites]

Yay, they're developing the game engine for next version of Roundabout Limo!
posted by drlith at 7:45 AM on October 18, 2014 [1 favorite]

Now speed it up a little and add Yakety Sax.
posted by nicwolff at 7:51 AM on October 18, 2014 [3 favorites]

I found it so disturbing that all the people lined up just completely ignored the inevitable outcome of what they were about to do.
posted by Room 641-A at 8:05 AM on October 18, 2014

I found it so disturbing that all the people lined up just completely ignored the inevitable outcome of what they were about to do.

The crisis, as they say, is an integral part of Capitalism.
posted by GenjiandProust at 8:10 AM on October 18, 2014 [17 favorites]

Maya Crowd Test 1
Maya Crowd Test 2
posted by Combustible Edison Lighthouse at 8:11 AM on October 18, 2014 [1 favorite]

Seems like that's not coincidental.

World War Z used Massive and MPC's proprietary system ALICE for the crowd effects. Here's an good overview.
posted by effbot at 8:17 AM on October 18, 2014 [1 favorite]

I feel a little bad for the ones that by dumb luck happen to make it past the whirling people-tripper, but then just fall all over their downed comrades anyway when they reach the far side.
posted by contraption at 8:21 AM on October 18, 2014 [3 favorites]

Oh, it's Carrousel.
posted by Room 641-A at 8:40 AM on October 18, 2014

Now speed it up a little and add Yakety Sax.

Unfortunately it is a vimeo not youtube, so the bennyhillifier doesn't work.
posted by marienbad at 8:42 AM on October 18, 2014

Don't show it to the guy who designed this.
posted by Devonian at 8:44 AM on October 18, 2014 [4 favorites]

I want to run that full-screen, fixed camera, as a permanently running simulation, and hang it on my wall. With a touch screen, so I can get my finger in the way of the bar and stop it spinning for a bit, and if I poke one of them they wiggle. Oh yes I do.
posted by bigbigdog at 8:45 AM on October 18, 2014 [5 favorites]

Why is it I'm rooting for the few guys that get through it half way through the video?

GO Little fake Human, GO!
posted by djrock3k at 8:59 AM on October 18, 2014 [1 favorite]

I had a moment of worry that it would be like a dangerous piece of playground equipment, and little guys and gals might snag a sleeve or a pantleg on the ground, and get limbs dragged under, and they'd get all scraped up and mangled instead of smoothly swept out to the end.

Then, I realized that the simulation's probably not quite that detailed.

Then, I was, I admit, a little disappointed.
posted by Mister Moofoo at 9:08 AM on October 18, 2014

My favorite part is at the end where you get groups of 3 or 4 people whose turn comes to walk up to the edge of this disaster, look at it for a moment, and then all together charge right in.

"Well, okay, let's do this."
posted by straight at 9:18 AM on October 18, 2014 [2 favorites]

Cubs fans.
posted by srboisvert at 9:20 AM on October 18, 2014 [3 favorites]

And then the very last guy trips before he can even get smacked by the bar.
posted by straight at 9:20 AM on October 18, 2014 [1 favorite]

What on earth is the deal with the big red afro hats?
posted by straight at 9:23 AM on October 18, 2014

The red afro hats are all the rage right now in hapless tiny man land.

It looks like they run until they hit something then they throw out their left arm to break the fall.
posted by boilermonster at 9:31 AM on October 18, 2014 [2 favorites]

Upon further reflection, this needs to be an ipad app. Like a tiny ant farm filled with a never-ending supply of little dudes running in. Here, give it a good shake! Poke, poke, poke.
posted by bigbigdog at 9:31 AM on October 18, 2014 [9 favorites]

Obligatory Soylent Green comment.
posted by Tube at 9:53 AM on October 18, 2014

What on earth is the deal with the big red afro hats?

They're turbans, although I so much wanted them to be foam cheeseheads that were red for some reason.
posted by hydrophonic at 10:09 AM on October 18, 2014

I know it's one thing to give some character to the prototypes in terms of different clothing, and I also realize this is merely a test of a rendering plugin.

Still, the (non-)decision to make every last one of these homuncules present as white-skinned males is so predictable that I can't help but see some congruence between the action depicted and the animation so rendered.
posted by mistersquid at 10:09 AM on October 18, 2014

waxpancake created a mashup http://tilde.club/~waxpancake/running/ on the double.
posted by neetij at 10:15 AM on October 18, 2014 [5 favorites]

Just another Black Friday at the local Walmart Supercenter.
posted by GoLikeHellMachine at 10:23 AM on October 18, 2014 [1 favorite]

Every single character falls over and literally can't get up.

This actually bugged me. There were a few who actually made it past the giant spinner, only to fall helplessly and hopelessly upon running into the pile of people on the other side. And they just sort of flailed around like an overturned turtle.
posted by asnider at 10:28 AM on October 18, 2014

It's a human Stir Crazy!
posted by Fig at 12:43 PM on October 18, 2014 [1 favorite]

Needs blood!
posted by ReeMonster at 1:21 PM on October 18, 2014

Cheese rolling.
posted by ReeMonster at 1:25 PM on October 18, 2014

On this episode of Takeshi's Castle: PAIN
posted by Going To Maine at 1:39 PM on October 18, 2014

mistersquid: "Still, the (non-)decision to make every last one of these homuncules present as white-skinned males is so predictable"

My guess is they're all same model, with randomized weight and clothing. AFAICT they all even have the same hair.
posted by vanar sena at 3:37 PM on October 18, 2014

Did that guy's pant's fall off when he got knocked over?
posted by vytae at 4:46 PM on October 18, 2014

Is there a macro where I can favorite everybody's comment at once?
I'm laughing too hard to do it one by one.
posted by MtDewd at 5:21 PM on October 18, 2014

A guy at Weta told me that then they where rendering the battle scenes in the Lord of the Rings they had problems with the decision making of the good little men, as in they would see the attacking army, make a chance of survival calculation and run away.
Weta had to down intelligence and up courage to get them to fight.
posted by thegirlwiththehat at 8:14 PM on October 18, 2014 [2 favorites]

That plane they were on seemed pretty spacious. Why not just go around? Stupid tiny ersatz people.
posted by axiom at 9:06 PM on October 18, 2014

Upon further reflection, this needs to be an ipad app. Like a tiny ant farm filled with a never-ending supply of little dudes running in. Here, give it a good shake! Poke, poke, poke.

holy shit i could play with that for hours. It wouldn't have to even have a plot or any real end goal of the gameplay. Just give me tons of different things i can plop down on several different maps(or one big one with lots of diverse areas) and have various ways of spawning new guys.

Or maybe it could be like incredible machine in reverse, and the idea would be that you had to prevent the guys from getting from point A to point B. Or some kind of sim city thing where they all have different goals and paths but you're trying to stop as many as you can.

Any way i think of this it seems like a really entertaining game.
posted by emptythought at 9:32 PM on October 18, 2014 [3 favorites]

If you make this game with zombies instead of little dudes I will cut you.
posted by bigbigdog at 12:08 AM on October 19, 2014 [1 favorite]

i keep desperately hoping that zombies will become totally uncool and that fad will die out. it sure is taking a long ass time though.
posted by emptythought at 4:05 PM on October 19, 2014

> Just give me tons of different things i can plop down on several different maps(or one big one with lots of diverse areas) and have various ways of spawning new guys.

You mean like Lemmings?
posted by ardgedee at 4:39 PM on October 19, 2014