Goofus and Muad'Dib
April 1, 2016 12:49 PM Subscribe
Goofus and Muad'Dib [via mefi projects]
Goofus and Gallant illustration mashup with Frank Herbert's Dune quotations.
Goofus takes the Water of Life and dies in horrible pain.
Muad'Dib succeeds in converting the Water of Life, in a process that kindles new and immense powers in the young Atreides Duke, such as perfect prescience.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 1:08 PM on April 1, 2016 [11 favorites]
Muad'Dib succeeds in converting the Water of Life, in a process that kindles new and immense powers in the young Atreides Duke, such as perfect prescience.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 1:08 PM on April 1, 2016 [11 favorites]
Goofus sits with his back to a door, because he's not in the mood for daily training.
Muad'dib knows that moods are for loveplay and cattle, and fights not one whit below his ability.
posted by Strange Interlude at 1:10 PM on April 1, 2016 [29 favorites]
Muad'dib knows that moods are for loveplay and cattle, and fights not one whit below his ability.
posted by Strange Interlude at 1:10 PM on April 1, 2016 [29 favorites]
Goofus dies painfully in the trial of the Gom Jabbar.
Maud'Dib proves he is human, not an animal.
posted by kokaku at 1:15 PM on April 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
Maud'Dib proves he is human, not an animal.
posted by kokaku at 1:15 PM on April 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
Discourtesy the likes of which God Himself has not seen!!!!
posted by GenjiandProust at 1:30 PM on April 1, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by GenjiandProust at 1:30 PM on April 1, 2016 [5 favorites]
Goofus is Harkonnen scum.
Gallant is a devout Fremen and knows the value of his tribe's water.
posted by Fizz at 1:32 PM on April 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
Gallant is a devout Fremen and knows the value of his tribe's water.
posted by Fizz at 1:32 PM on April 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
Goofus is killed by Shai-Hulud in the deep desert.
Muad'Dib walks without rhythm so as not to attract the worm.
posted by logicpunk at 1:38 PM on April 1, 2016 [14 favorites]
Muad'Dib walks without rhythm so as not to attract the worm.
posted by logicpunk at 1:38 PM on April 1, 2016 [14 favorites]
[Also, someone on .tumblr remarked that I'm using quotations that are not solely attributed to Paul Muad'Dib. I had considered that, but I opted to use any/all quotations from the Dune universe, it just makes for more variety. I've enjoyed this project thus far. Thanks for the support MetaFilter.]
posted by Fizz at 1:38 PM on April 1, 2016 [9 favorites]
posted by Fizz at 1:38 PM on April 1, 2016 [9 favorites]
Goofus' fast blow is turned.
Gallant's slow knife penetrates the shield.
posted by CaseyB at 1:40 PM on April 1, 2016 [26 favorites]
Gallant's slow knife penetrates the shield.
posted by CaseyB at 1:40 PM on April 1, 2016 [26 favorites]
Goofus is trapped in a cave when Harkonnen artillery collapses the entrance.
Muad'Dib knows that anyone who seeks shelter in a cave with only one exit is a fool who deserves to die.
posted by Gelatin at 1:52 PM on April 1, 2016 [8 favorites]
Muad'Dib knows that anyone who seeks shelter in a cave with only one exit is a fool who deserves to die.
posted by Gelatin at 1:52 PM on April 1, 2016 [8 favorites]
This is amazing.
Goofus fires his lasgun at a shielded opponent.
Muad'Dib achieves victory through Desert Power on the Arrakeen plain.
posted by killdevil at 2:11 PM on April 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
Goofus fires his lasgun at a shielded opponent.
Muad'Dib achieves victory through Desert Power on the Arrakeen plain.
posted by killdevil at 2:11 PM on April 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
Goofus is the mind-killer.
posted by Parasite Unseen at 2:11 PM on April 1, 2016 [7 favorites]
posted by Parasite Unseen at 2:11 PM on April 1, 2016 [7 favorites]
Anakin despises sand, and by this he is truly known.
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 2:14 PM on April 1, 2016 [7 favorites]
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 2:14 PM on April 1, 2016 [7 favorites]
Huh. As far as I know, I basically invented this. I never developed it in any way though.
posted by anazgnos at 2:34 PM on April 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by anazgnos at 2:34 PM on April 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
[Anazgnos, I have honestly never seen that before and was under the impression I was just following along in another mashup. Apologies if I've stepped on your toes, so to speak.]
posted by Fizz at 2:43 PM on April 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by Fizz at 2:43 PM on April 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
Not at all, just took it for a surprising coincidence. It was just a fart of a post on r/pics five years ago that went nowhere, and I had no designs on it behond that!
posted by anazgnos at 2:58 PM on April 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by anazgnos at 2:58 PM on April 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
Goofus slips and falls.
Muad'Dib knows that on an uncertain surface, bare feet are best.
posted by eriko at 3:33 PM on April 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
Muad'Dib knows that on an uncertain surface, bare feet are best.
posted by eriko at 3:33 PM on April 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
Goofus wears his stillsuit too loose around the chest, and does not gain the benefit of pumping action from his breathing.
Muad'Dib fits his desert boots slip-fashion at the ankles.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 4:19 PM on April 1, 2016 [15 favorites]
Muad'Dib fits his desert boots slip-fashion at the ankles.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 4:19 PM on April 1, 2016 [15 favorites]
Goofus fears that place he dares not look.
Muad'Dib stares back out at you.
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln at 7:11 PM on April 1, 2016 [4 favorites]
Muad'Dib stares back out at you.
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln at 7:11 PM on April 1, 2016 [4 favorites]
Goofus is an abomination! ... His mother deserves a punishment greater than anything in history.
Death! It cannot come too quickly for that child or for the one who spawned him!
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln at 7:13 PM on April 1, 2016 [4 favorites]
Death! It cannot come too quickly for that child or for the one who spawned him!
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln at 7:13 PM on April 1, 2016 [4 favorites]
Goofus kills his mind through fear.
Muad'Dib permits the fear to pass over him and through him.
posted by percor at 7:15 PM on April 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
Muad'Dib permits the fear to pass over him and through him.
posted by percor at 7:15 PM on April 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
"Goofus! Goofus! Goofus!" goes the refrain. "A million deaths were not enough for Goofus!"
from A Child's History of Muad'Dib by the Princess Irulan.
posted by Strutter Cane - United Planets Stilt Patrol at 7:30 PM on April 1, 2016 [17 favorites]
from A Child's History of Muad'Dib by the Princess Irulan.
posted by Strutter Cane - United Planets Stilt Patrol at 7:30 PM on April 1, 2016 [17 favorites]
and he'll know, he'll know, that it is I, Baron Goofus Harkonnen, who encompasses his doom!
posted by Archelaus at 7:33 PM on April 1, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by Archelaus at 7:33 PM on April 1, 2016 [4 favorites]
Goofus: "Is the Gallant ready?"
Muad'Dib: "May thy knife chip and shatter!"
posted by infinitewindow at 10:43 PM on April 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
Muad'Dib: "May thy knife chip and shatter!"
posted by infinitewindow at 10:43 PM on April 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
Muad'Dib crowdsources the worldbuilding for his epic space opera.
Goofus and his buddy write unnecessary prequels and sequels.
posted by infinitewindow at 6:11 PM on April 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
Goofus and his buddy write unnecessary prequels and sequels.
posted by infinitewindow at 6:11 PM on April 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
Goofus is shocked by the tone of his voice
Gallant knows that walking without rhythm, it won't attract the worm
Oh wait, that was Goofus and Fatboy Slim.
posted by maxsparber at 11:03 AM on April 11, 2016 [1 favorite]
Gallant knows that walking without rhythm, it won't attract the worm
Oh wait, that was Goofus and Fatboy Slim.
posted by maxsparber at 11:03 AM on April 11, 2016 [1 favorite]
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Muad'Dib remains in the trap, endures the pain, and feigns death that he might kill the trapper and remove a threat to his kind.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 1:05 PM on April 1, 2016 [34 favorites]