Quitting Your Job to Pursue Your Passion is Bulls***
May 30, 2016 7:42 AM Subscribe
If you're a small business owner or independent contractor like the author of the article, you are not really your own boss. But instead of having just one or two bosses, you suddently have 10 or 20, or however many are sending work your way. Except that now they're called "clients".
posted by sour cream at 8:12 AM on May 30, 2016 [79 favorites]
posted by sour cream at 8:12 AM on May 30, 2016 [79 favorites]
It seems like it's no longer cool to willingly retire before 40. You have to be a serial entrepreneur even when you're fed up with the rat race.
Entrepreneurship has been sold to the public as some All-American™ dream to strive for, as if it's akin to walking in the glorious footsteps of the Founding Fathers, who established our nation as a haven for the Entrepreneurial Spirit. It's the goal of the whole "If you work hard, success will follow" belief system.
That it frees big employers from paying competitive salaries and benefits is merely a bonus.
posted by Thorzdad at 8:15 AM on May 30, 2016 [46 favorites]
Entrepreneurship has been sold to the public as some All-American™ dream to strive for, as if it's akin to walking in the glorious footsteps of the Founding Fathers, who established our nation as a haven for the Entrepreneurial Spirit. It's the goal of the whole "If you work hard, success will follow" belief system.
That it frees big employers from paying competitive salaries and benefits is merely a bonus.
posted by Thorzdad at 8:15 AM on May 30, 2016 [46 favorites]
If you're a small business owner or independent contractor like the author of the article, you are not really your own boss. But instead of having just one or two bosses, you suddenly have 10 or 20, or however many are sending work your way. Except that now they're called "clients".
If you're an employee, instead of having 10 or 20 clients, you have one. And they own you. Except that now they're called "boss." They tell you how to work, and where to work and what to work on, and they can still (basically) fire you at any time. And if they do, you don't have any income, because you've gone from 1 client to 0 clients. How is that any better?
posted by leotrotsky at 8:19 AM on May 30, 2016 [29 favorites]
If you're an employee, instead of having 10 or 20 clients, you have one. And they own you. Except that now they're called "boss." They tell you how to work, and where to work and what to work on, and they can still (basically) fire you at any time. And if they do, you don't have any income, because you've gone from 1 client to 0 clients. How is that any better?
posted by leotrotsky at 8:19 AM on May 30, 2016 [29 favorites]
*Offer may not apply in countries with decent labor laws*
posted by leotrotsky at 8:21 AM on May 30, 2016 [9 favorites]
posted by leotrotsky at 8:21 AM on May 30, 2016 [9 favorites]
If you're an employee, instead of having 10 or 20 clients, you have one. And they own you. Except that now they're called "boss." They tell you how to work, and where to work and what to work on, and they can still (basically) fire you at any time. And if they do, you don't have any income, because you've gone from 1 client to 0 clients. How is that any better?
They pay you when they say, on a regular basis? You get paid time off that you accrue, and there are laws in place about how much sick time you get? If you're fired for an illegitimate cause, you can sue them? When you're fired, you are eligible for unemployment? You don't have to invest your own capital for equipment, advertising, research, etc.? Because in some environments (not enough), you are unionized and you can negotiate for the whole workforce in your place of employment?
I mean, it's wonderful to want to be your own boss, but it's a riskier proposition than working for an established company, even though it's tempting to spin it as otherwise.
posted by xingcat at 8:27 AM on May 30, 2016 [66 favorites]
They pay you when they say, on a regular basis? You get paid time off that you accrue, and there are laws in place about how much sick time you get? If you're fired for an illegitimate cause, you can sue them? When you're fired, you are eligible for unemployment? You don't have to invest your own capital for equipment, advertising, research, etc.? Because in some environments (not enough), you are unionized and you can negotiate for the whole workforce in your place of employment?
I mean, it's wonderful to want to be your own boss, but it's a riskier proposition than working for an established company, even though it's tempting to spin it as otherwise.
posted by xingcat at 8:27 AM on May 30, 2016 [66 favorites]
Living from paycheck to paycheck means I really like knowing where that next one is coming from!
posted by allthinky at 8:29 AM on May 30, 2016 [19 favorites]
posted by allthinky at 8:29 AM on May 30, 2016 [19 favorites]
I mean, it's wonderful to want to be your own boss, but it's a riskier proposition than working for an established company, even though it's tempting to spin it as otherwise.
It's differently risky. The risks hit at different times and in different ways. If I'm 50 and my company decides to downsize, I could very well be unable to find a new job, despite my experience and skill-set, because of my age (despite what ADEA says). If I'm 50 and have my own company with a set of loyal clients, I'm not going to have that same problem.
I'm not claiming that everyone should start a business, and I'm not saying it isn't risky, but there are absolutely risks to working for someone else, as well. And they're risks that I suspect are harder to mitigate, because you've got much less control over your circumstances.
posted by leotrotsky at 8:33 AM on May 30, 2016 [21 favorites]
It's differently risky. The risks hit at different times and in different ways. If I'm 50 and my company decides to downsize, I could very well be unable to find a new job, despite my experience and skill-set, because of my age (despite what ADEA says). If I'm 50 and have my own company with a set of loyal clients, I'm not going to have that same problem.
I'm not claiming that everyone should start a business, and I'm not saying it isn't risky, but there are absolutely risks to working for someone else, as well. And they're risks that I suspect are harder to mitigate, because you've got much less control over your circumstances.
posted by leotrotsky at 8:33 AM on May 30, 2016 [21 favorites]
We praise people that are “courageous” enough to quit their 9-to-5 and dive into the deep end of the exciting unknown.
Not sure who this "we" is, but that's not something I'd praise. (At least without a ton of caveats and reservations)
If the author is seeing those messages, perhaps she should be a more critical reader and less like Homer Simpson on billboard day.
posted by jpe at 8:33 AM on May 30, 2016 [3 favorites]
Not sure who this "we" is, but that's not something I'd praise. (At least without a ton of caveats and reservations)
If the author is seeing those messages, perhaps she should be a more critical reader and less like Homer Simpson on billboard day.
posted by jpe at 8:33 AM on May 30, 2016 [3 favorites]
If the length of the average term of employment is currently 2-2.5 years, the value of self-employment should not be thought of in terms of a forever-job. The things you learn or accomplish by finding clients and running your own projects for a year or two, versus what you'd learn in a similar time period working for somebody else can be valuable, even if you end up just treading water financially. Self employment may be like the journeyman period of artisanal training, where your skills are beyond apprentice level, but you can't find an employer who wants to be liable for giving you enough rope to hang yourself.
posted by GameDesignerBen at 8:35 AM on May 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by GameDesignerBen at 8:35 AM on May 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
Entrepreneurship lends itself to being packaged as a product, making it easy to buy the tools and think you're well on your way to success.
Plunk down $499 and have your own HerbaAmKay MLM "business"!
Fork over a few hundred dollars and fill out an online form and you've got an LLC, ready to be your own boss.
As with the gold rush, money is in selling tools, not panning for ore.
posted by dr_dank at 8:39 AM on May 30, 2016 [12 favorites]
Plunk down $499 and have your own HerbaAmKay MLM "business"!
Fork over a few hundred dollars and fill out an online form and you've got an LLC, ready to be your own boss.
As with the gold rush, money is in selling tools, not panning for ore.
posted by dr_dank at 8:39 AM on May 30, 2016 [12 favorites]
If you're an employee, instead of having 10 or 20 clients, you have one. And they own you. Except that now they're called "boss." They tell you how to work, and where to work and what to work on, and they can still (basically) fire you at any time. And if they do, you don't have any income, because you've gone from 1 client to 0 clients. How is that any better?
You make it sound as if any employer will just be happy to fire you on a whim. But this isn't so.
If they do:
a) they'll have to look for a replacement,
b) they'll need to train the replacement,
c) they'll loose institutional knowledge with the person they fired (depending on how long that person was there),
d) morale within the company/group may decrease,
e) there may be a lot of additional work for HR,
f) there may be further undesirable repercussions within the company.
Depending on the labor market, all this (and especially points a) to c)) may lead to considerable costs, in particular when you're looking at highly skilled employees.
In the end, it's usually a tradeoff between the costs of firing someone (which is often underestimated) and the "damage" done by keeping them.
But outside of very unskilled labor, this means that the costs of firing people are much too high to be just firing people on the win.
The key to all this is that you need to be looking for a skill set that makes it difficult to fire you (yeah, I know, easier said than done). Not being an asshole to your coworkers generally also helps.
posted by sour cream at 8:39 AM on May 30, 2016 [4 favorites]
You make it sound as if any employer will just be happy to fire you on a whim. But this isn't so.
If they do:
a) they'll have to look for a replacement,
b) they'll need to train the replacement,
c) they'll loose institutional knowledge with the person they fired (depending on how long that person was there),
d) morale within the company/group may decrease,
e) there may be a lot of additional work for HR,
f) there may be further undesirable repercussions within the company.
Depending on the labor market, all this (and especially points a) to c)) may lead to considerable costs, in particular when you're looking at highly skilled employees.
In the end, it's usually a tradeoff between the costs of firing someone (which is often underestimated) and the "damage" done by keeping them.
But outside of very unskilled labor, this means that the costs of firing people are much too high to be just firing people on the win.
The key to all this is that you need to be looking for a skill set that makes it difficult to fire you (yeah, I know, easier said than done). Not being an asshole to your coworkers generally also helps.
posted by sour cream at 8:39 AM on May 30, 2016 [4 favorites]
Video games tried to teach us, but we didn't listen to the lessons. There is never just one boss. Behind every boss is a bigger boss. The bosses are ultimately miserable and broke with fatal flaws. Mostly life consists of grinding it out for XP in low stakes encounters until you are adequate.
posted by humanfont at 8:49 AM on May 30, 2016 [85 favorites]
posted by humanfont at 8:49 AM on May 30, 2016 [85 favorites]
Been exclusively freelancing from home for over 20 years and I am my own boss. In the video game sense.
posted by bonobothegreat at 8:53 AM on May 30, 2016 [16 favorites]
posted by bonobothegreat at 8:53 AM on May 30, 2016 [16 favorites]
The biggest reason I didn't consider writing freelance and doing nothing but that was because for me, the anxiety I would get from not knowing with a certainty that I am going to be paid on some future date would interfere with my concentration all the time, and I wouldn't ever get anything done. There are people who simply are not wired for entrepeneurialship, and I am one.
But I finally found something that acknowledged that. I took this quiz once that was supposed to identify your "life passion profile" - and I quickly figured it it was more about "how your personality can shape the WAY you pursue your passion". The site divided people up into about four or five personality types, and the one I got was some dippy name like "thriver", but the description was SO dead-on - I'm much more comfortable if I have a steady source of income with a day job, and then doing what I want on the weekends and in the evenings. "The trick is to find a job that is easy enough," they advised, "so that you can have the mental energy left over to do that."
Which sounds like obvious advice, but it was so refreshing to hear someone saying that that kind of route counts too. They also came up with a phrase, "curating your life," that I've actually been using in my head a lot lately - and it has been making much more of a difference than any of the live your best life/follow your passion/pursue your dreams bullshit ever did.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 8:54 AM on May 30, 2016 [55 favorites]
But I finally found something that acknowledged that. I took this quiz once that was supposed to identify your "life passion profile" - and I quickly figured it it was more about "how your personality can shape the WAY you pursue your passion". The site divided people up into about four or five personality types, and the one I got was some dippy name like "thriver", but the description was SO dead-on - I'm much more comfortable if I have a steady source of income with a day job, and then doing what I want on the weekends and in the evenings. "The trick is to find a job that is easy enough," they advised, "so that you can have the mental energy left over to do that."
Which sounds like obvious advice, but it was so refreshing to hear someone saying that that kind of route counts too. They also came up with a phrase, "curating your life," that I've actually been using in my head a lot lately - and it has been making much more of a difference than any of the live your best life/follow your passion/pursue your dreams bullshit ever did.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 8:54 AM on May 30, 2016 [55 favorites]
You make it sound as if any employer will just be happy to fire you on a whim. But this isn't so.
No, it's more that with self-employment there's a gradient, with regular employment there's a step function.
posted by leotrotsky at 9:04 AM on May 30, 2016 [9 favorites]
No, it's more that with self-employment there's a gradient, with regular employment there's a step function.
posted by leotrotsky at 9:04 AM on May 30, 2016 [9 favorites]
I'm not a huge fan of my job--it's not very interesting even as far as admin goes, it pays okay, I'm the designated office weirdo--but I'm even less of a fan of financial instability. So I posted this because it was nice to hear that maybe I'm not a total loser in that I cannot just up and quit because reasons. I would love to make a living with one of my passions but I'm not confident or fiscally stable enough to do that, despite having a good chunk of what could be considered privilege.
posted by Kitteh at 9:05 AM on May 30, 2016 [20 favorites]
posted by Kitteh at 9:05 AM on May 30, 2016 [20 favorites]
Speaking as someone who hasn't held a "day job" in 20 years, I am a HUGE proponent of the day job for creative folks particularly. Most people who do creative work don't get hugely compensated for it and are likely never to be. Trying to string together a living from a creative field is often an exercise in alternating panic and desperation, and after one's mid-20s, the desire to eat something more than sodium noodles is a powerful thing. A day job pays you, gives you a margin and can give the mental peace of mind to pursue passions without worrying about starvation.
Also, you know. Not every passion NEEDS to be a job. Not every passion NEEDS to consume every waking hour of one's life. In which case -- day job! Its a thing to do that pays you money. Hard to beat.
("Yeah, but you don't have a day job, Scalzi!" No I don't, and I'm well and fully aware I'm an outlier. But I did have a day job for years, and those day jobs helped give me the space/training/skills/patience to make working for myself viable when it I went freelance. Day jobs aren't something to escape from, though they might be something to graduate from, if that's a thing you want to do. And if you don't -- groovy.)
posted by jscalzi at 9:14 AM on May 30, 2016 [61 favorites]
Also, you know. Not every passion NEEDS to be a job. Not every passion NEEDS to consume every waking hour of one's life. In which case -- day job! Its a thing to do that pays you money. Hard to beat.
("Yeah, but you don't have a day job, Scalzi!" No I don't, and I'm well and fully aware I'm an outlier. But I did have a day job for years, and those day jobs helped give me the space/training/skills/patience to make working for myself viable when it I went freelance. Day jobs aren't something to escape from, though they might be something to graduate from, if that's a thing you want to do. And if you don't -- groovy.)
posted by jscalzi at 9:14 AM on May 30, 2016 [61 favorites]
I think it's a lot easier to quit your job and go freelance if you have some sort of fallback. For young people, that usually seems to be parents who can swoop in if the shit hits the fan. For older people, that's often a spouse or partner with a regular income. And that's totally great, but it's a little annoying when people pretend that there aren't external factors that help them take the brave step to go out on their own.
posted by ArbitraryAndCapricious at 9:16 AM on May 30, 2016 [16 favorites]
posted by ArbitraryAndCapricious at 9:16 AM on May 30, 2016 [16 favorites]
I am one of those people who quit the 9-5 to run my own creative business.
I was having the following conversation with an old friend recently.
Her: "So amazing you've done this! Many more people should just take their lives into their own hands!"
Me: "I am privileged. Yes, I fell seriously ill, managed to reinvent myself and am now my own boss. But I grew up in a country with free university tuition (I don't have any debts as a result), I'm articulate and white middle-class, my partner works FT, I live in an affordable neighbourhood, and I'm willing to work 7 days/week and until 11pm at night."
Her: "Uhm."
I don't have privileges that some other people have in my field (I don't come from an affluent background, for instance), but there is no denying that things have been easier for me than they would be for others - and it's still been very hard work. I'd recommend 'doing creativity' as a part-time gig with another part-time gig providing financial security - many people find the creative bit is far less fun when it turns into an actual job.
posted by kariebookish at 9:18 AM on May 30, 2016 [14 favorites]
I was having the following conversation with an old friend recently.
Her: "So amazing you've done this! Many more people should just take their lives into their own hands!"
Me: "I am privileged. Yes, I fell seriously ill, managed to reinvent myself and am now my own boss. But I grew up in a country with free university tuition (I don't have any debts as a result), I'm articulate and white middle-class, my partner works FT, I live in an affordable neighbourhood, and I'm willing to work 7 days/week and until 11pm at night."
Her: "Uhm."
I don't have privileges that some other people have in my field (I don't come from an affluent background, for instance), but there is no denying that things have been easier for me than they would be for others - and it's still been very hard work. I'd recommend 'doing creativity' as a part-time gig with another part-time gig providing financial security - many people find the creative bit is far less fun when it turns into an actual job.
posted by kariebookish at 9:18 AM on May 30, 2016 [14 favorites]
I have to admit - I dream of "quitting" and doing something else... Even though I am primarily a contract IT consultant... (Yep, I have many many many bosses - and they are called clients...)
... But I don't kid myself that it will all be sunshine and lollipops...
... And, I have followed enough people who have done this before, that I know it will have it's own unique set of challenges...
Some great reading material:
- Jamie Zawinski (i.e. Netscape Navigator, Mozilla - now proprietor of DNA Lounge)
- Jonathon Coulton (i.e. Web Developer/Designer turned Singer-Songwriter)
posted by jkaczor at 9:18 AM on May 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
... But I don't kid myself that it will all be sunshine and lollipops...
... And, I have followed enough people who have done this before, that I know it will have it's own unique set of challenges...
Some great reading material:
- Jamie Zawinski (i.e. Netscape Navigator, Mozilla - now proprietor of DNA Lounge)
- Jonathon Coulton (i.e. Web Developer/Designer turned Singer-Songwriter)
posted by jkaczor at 9:18 AM on May 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
For the past eight years, I've been working an extremely dull day job. It pays enough to, with my spouse, keep us and our child more or less middle class in the USA. I do this job even though it is absurd and boring because it is also extremely easy for me, and I can spend my mental resources on the things I care about, viz short fantasy/horror fiction and board games, neither of which are viable sources of income. If I lived in my ideal world, I'd be writing for a living and hosting board game nights every weekend. I do not, and so we continue.
posted by Scattercat at 9:18 AM on May 30, 2016 [11 favorites]
posted by Scattercat at 9:18 AM on May 30, 2016 [11 favorites]
Also, some people are not well-suited to being their own bosses. I am not. Being my own boss would leave me a miserable, anxious wreck. At this point, unless I actually do get laid off, I know what I'll be bringing in every month; I know how my insurance works; I know what my days look like. I'm an introvert who really likes stability, and that means a lot. I'm also lousy at saving, so having my employer forcibly drop money into the retirement account before it hits my bank account is fantastic.
I like working for others. I don't think that even in a country with universal healthcare, housing and retirement I would want to be my own boss. I just don't have the personality for it. Even if I had my dream job (teaching - but adjuncting is my nightmare job, so I gave up on that one), I would still be working for a university.
posted by Frowner at 9:22 AM on May 30, 2016 [37 favorites]
I like working for others. I don't think that even in a country with universal healthcare, housing and retirement I would want to be my own boss. I just don't have the personality for it. Even if I had my dream job (teaching - but adjuncting is my nightmare job, so I gave up on that one), I would still be working for a university.
posted by Frowner at 9:22 AM on May 30, 2016 [37 favorites]
I think one problem is that it's actually pretty tough to find a day job that pays a living wage and doesn't expect you to spend every waking moment working at it, so that you still have time and energy to pursue other interests. I have a job like that, but they're not super easy to find.
posted by ArbitraryAndCapricious at 9:22 AM on May 30, 2016 [11 favorites]
posted by ArbitraryAndCapricious at 9:22 AM on May 30, 2016 [11 favorites]
For older people, that's often a spouse or partner with a regular income. And that's totally great, but it's a little annoying when people pretend that there aren't external factors that help them take the brave step to go out on their own.
My partner is definitely the breadwinner in our family; he encourages me to really pursue stuff I love doing, but his salary is very much not You Do You For Work.
I have a day job that doesn't require me to think or care about it once I'm off the clock--except to whinge about why I am the one who has to explain to co-workers about LGBTQ or liberal news stories (my office is conservative)--so that's a bonus, for sure.
posted by Kitteh at 9:23 AM on May 30, 2016 [2 favorites]
My partner is definitely the breadwinner in our family; he encourages me to really pursue stuff I love doing, but his salary is very much not You Do You For Work.
I have a day job that doesn't require me to think or care about it once I'm off the clock--except to whinge about why I am the one who has to explain to co-workers about LGBTQ or liberal news stories (my office is conservative)--so that's a bonus, for sure.
posted by Kitteh at 9:23 AM on May 30, 2016 [2 favorites]
I should be clear that I'm not in any way denigrating people who can be their own boss because they have a spouse or partner with a steady job! It's more that it's one of those unstated things that I think ought to be stated.
posted by ArbitraryAndCapricious at 9:31 AM on May 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by ArbitraryAndCapricious at 9:31 AM on May 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
Amen. Just wait until EVERYONE is freelance and hustling for their next check and then we'll see how romantic and courageous they think it is. I've been freelance for 10 years now and it's all the same drudgery and BS minus benefits and a steady paycheck.
posted by photoslob at 9:34 AM on May 30, 2016 [9 favorites]
posted by photoslob at 9:34 AM on May 30, 2016 [9 favorites]
I've been an independent web dev since the mid-90s and while there are moments where it's been lucrative, most of the time it has not been so. And I'm a lot like metafilter in that most of the time my income comes from one big client, which, when they go away, is a crushing, anxiety-inducing mess of no income and having to scramble.
And on the slip side, I'm fairly confident I am unemployable now as a web dev at a "real" job: I'm 50, and while good at what I do I'm not a genius, and there are people 25 years my junior who will work more cheaply. I also don't have a degree, so that would immediately bar me from consideration in many places.
So here we are. UBI would sort all of this out. Society would flourish if such a thing was possible.
posted by maxwelton at 9:48 AM on May 30, 2016 [22 favorites]
And on the slip side, I'm fairly confident I am unemployable now as a web dev at a "real" job: I'm 50, and while good at what I do I'm not a genius, and there are people 25 years my junior who will work more cheaply. I also don't have a degree, so that would immediately bar me from consideration in many places.
So here we are. UBI would sort all of this out. Society would flourish if such a thing was possible.
posted by maxwelton at 9:48 AM on May 30, 2016 [22 favorites]
No, it's more that with self-employment there's a gradient, with regular employment there's a step function.
I see your point. But I don't think even that is so clear-cut.
Employed in company: Depending on the company, there may be possibilities to be transferred, promoted, demoted etc, so not necessarily a step function.
Self-employed: Depending on your client structure, loss of one particular client may mean that the business is not viable anymore. This is particularly the case in the kinds of gigs described by the author (freelance graphics designer).
Also, as a small business owner, the headaches really start when you have your own employees who expect regular paychecks.
posted by sour cream at 9:50 AM on May 30, 2016
I see your point. But I don't think even that is so clear-cut.
Employed in company: Depending on the company, there may be possibilities to be transferred, promoted, demoted etc, so not necessarily a step function.
Self-employed: Depending on your client structure, loss of one particular client may mean that the business is not viable anymore. This is particularly the case in the kinds of gigs described by the author (freelance graphics designer).
Also, as a small business owner, the headaches really start when you have your own employees who expect regular paychecks.
posted by sour cream at 9:50 AM on May 30, 2016
I just finished Big Magic, and although Elizabeth Gilbert is strongly encouraging us to be creative, she emphatically tells us not to 'follow our bliss', at least if we are expecting our bliss to pay the bills.
She did not quit her day job until after she had had a few books published, specifically the one that sold 10 million copies.
posted by MtDewd at 9:52 AM on May 30, 2016 [2 favorites]
She did not quit her day job until after she had had a few books published, specifically the one that sold 10 million copies.
posted by MtDewd at 9:52 AM on May 30, 2016 [2 favorites]
"I am privileged to not have any student loans to repay. (I guess dropping out of college finally paid off haha.)"
(weeps)
posted by doctornemo at 9:53 AM on May 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
(weeps)
posted by doctornemo at 9:53 AM on May 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
Also, as a small business owner, the headaches really start when you have your own employees who expect regular paychecks.
They do, but that's also the time where concerns about not being able to take time off for vacation or illness become less of an issue.
posted by atrazine at 9:54 AM on May 30, 2016
They do, but that's also the time where concerns about not being able to take time off for vacation or illness become less of an issue.
posted by atrazine at 9:54 AM on May 30, 2016
You know what's really fun and not at all anxiety-inducing? Being in a dual-freelance, two-young-kid family.
not bitter
posted by gottabefunky at 10:09 AM on May 30, 2016 [3 favorites]
not bitter
posted by gottabefunky at 10:09 AM on May 30, 2016 [3 favorites]
There are many of being self employed. For example, I own my own company, am my own boo, and all that, but I have a relationship with a company that takes care of sales and project management and that stuff I have no desire to deal with.
posted by feloniousmonk at 10:30 AM on May 30, 2016
posted by feloniousmonk at 10:30 AM on May 30, 2016
EmpressCallipygos, thanks for referral to the quiz. I got Side Hustler, partner got Tribe Member. As is often the case with these quizzes, it's not that it told us anything we didn't already know, and yet it can still be helpful to see these things written out (and positively affirmed...)
posted by Cozybee at 10:43 AM on May 30, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by Cozybee at 10:43 AM on May 30, 2016 [5 favorites]
Don't forget the tax penalty.
Seriously, don't forget the tax penalty. I didn't even know there was a tax penalty when I went freelance about 12 years ago. Going freelance was great! I quit my shitty, shitty job at a place with shitty, shitty coworkers. I ended up making almost three times as much money than I did at my shitty job. I got to stay at home, in my underwear, with my cats, while other people went off to their shitty jobs. I could sleep in if I wanted, stay up until 2 a.m. if I wanted. I had extra money for the first time in my life.
Except. I didn't really know what I was doing. No one told me I should have been putting some of that money away since the tax rate on the self-employed is significant and it's not withheld from your paychecks. When it came tax time, I owed BIG. And, I'd been without healthcare for two years, so I didn't have easy access to the kind of prescriptions I now take to manage anxiety. Big tax bill plus untreated anxiety was a bad combination for me, and it resulted in my not filing taxes (and descending into an ever-deeper anxiety pit) for two whole years -- I guess hoping the IRS wouldn't notice? They did, and by the time they did I owed them $18,000. (Which I only finally paid off a few months ago.)
Then the economy tanked, and there was no work for people like me, and I was unemployed for close to a year, and it didn't matter anymore that I had been making three times what I'd made at my previous shitty job.
I finally found work, and now I've been in a steady job with a reliable employer for almost 8 years. Great benefits, decent income, relatively little worry compared to where I was before. There's the usual office politics, yeah, and the other pitfalls associated with being around people all day, but knowing when the next paycheck is coming, and how much money will be going into the checking account, is worth it.
Moral of the story: Being your own boss is great if you are a great boss. I wasn't.
posted by mudpuppie at 10:55 AM on May 30, 2016 [21 favorites]
Seriously, don't forget the tax penalty. I didn't even know there was a tax penalty when I went freelance about 12 years ago. Going freelance was great! I quit my shitty, shitty job at a place with shitty, shitty coworkers. I ended up making almost three times as much money than I did at my shitty job. I got to stay at home, in my underwear, with my cats, while other people went off to their shitty jobs. I could sleep in if I wanted, stay up until 2 a.m. if I wanted. I had extra money for the first time in my life.
Except. I didn't really know what I was doing. No one told me I should have been putting some of that money away since the tax rate on the self-employed is significant and it's not withheld from your paychecks. When it came tax time, I owed BIG. And, I'd been without healthcare for two years, so I didn't have easy access to the kind of prescriptions I now take to manage anxiety. Big tax bill plus untreated anxiety was a bad combination for me, and it resulted in my not filing taxes (and descending into an ever-deeper anxiety pit) for two whole years -- I guess hoping the IRS wouldn't notice? They did, and by the time they did I owed them $18,000. (Which I only finally paid off a few months ago.)
Then the economy tanked, and there was no work for people like me, and I was unemployed for close to a year, and it didn't matter anymore that I had been making three times what I'd made at my previous shitty job.
I finally found work, and now I've been in a steady job with a reliable employer for almost 8 years. Great benefits, decent income, relatively little worry compared to where I was before. There's the usual office politics, yeah, and the other pitfalls associated with being around people all day, but knowing when the next paycheck is coming, and how much money will be going into the checking account, is worth it.
Moral of the story: Being your own boss is great if you are a great boss. I wasn't.
posted by mudpuppie at 10:55 AM on May 30, 2016 [21 favorites]
You make it sound as if any employer will just be happy to fire you on a whim. But this isn't so.
If they do:
a) they'll have to look for a replacement,
or make someone work more overtime
b) they'll need to train the replacement,
two days and then they have the employees "train" them
c) they'll loose institutional knowledge with the person they fired (depending on how long that person was there),
they don't listen to institutional knowledge, because the management's not been there as long as many employees have been and management is always right
d) morale within the company/group may decrease,
morale doesn't make product or money
e) there may be a lot of additional work for HR,
they're probably looking for another job anyway
f) there may be further undesirable repercussions within the company.
short of someone going postal or suing, there's no money involved so it's all good
posted by pyramid termite at 11:01 AM on May 30, 2016 [24 favorites]
If they do:
a) they'll have to look for a replacement,
or make someone work more overtime
b) they'll need to train the replacement,
two days and then they have the employees "train" them
c) they'll loose institutional knowledge with the person they fired (depending on how long that person was there),
they don't listen to institutional knowledge, because the management's not been there as long as many employees have been and management is always right
d) morale within the company/group may decrease,
morale doesn't make product or money
e) there may be a lot of additional work for HR,
they're probably looking for another job anyway
f) there may be further undesirable repercussions within the company.
short of someone going postal or suing, there's no money involved so it's all good
posted by pyramid termite at 11:01 AM on May 30, 2016 [24 favorites]
Some years ago, I gave up my bookstore job and bought a bookstore. Many parts of it were really wonderful. But there's huge stress at always having the wolf at the door. I was my own boss, but the rent kept going up, other bookstores opened, employees and related paperwork are a massive drag, etc. Then I married someone with a freelance job. Then I got pregnant. Sold the bookstore profitably. Regrets? Maybe a few. Mostly that it was hard to find a decent day job with benefits in a recession. When Borders opened, I was glad I didn't face that competition, and when Amazon opened - they started with books - remember - Iwas so happy not to have that competition. I really like employer-provided health insurance, and prior to Obamacare, it was a horrible mess to get insurance on your own (Vote Blue). I like regular holidays. Don't love my current job, but love that I can walk away if I choose.
Want to make money and be self-employed? Scale it up. Be a plumber or electrician with a couple assistants. Start a garage wit several good mechanics. There are successful photographers and designers, but there's a ton of competition. There are opportunities in businesses that provide services people need. It's a ton of work, it's a ton of hassle, and it's a risk. I learned a huge amount from being self-employed.
posted by theora55 at 11:06 AM on May 30, 2016 [3 favorites]
Want to make money and be self-employed? Scale it up. Be a plumber or electrician with a couple assistants. Start a garage wit several good mechanics. There are successful photographers and designers, but there's a ton of competition. There are opportunities in businesses that provide services people need. It's a ton of work, it's a ton of hassle, and it's a risk. I learned a huge amount from being self-employed.
posted by theora55 at 11:06 AM on May 30, 2016 [3 favorites]
What about co-ops? That's really what I would like (and am trying to figure out how to do with some friends). At least in my field, most companies just want to take advantage of you and spit you out, and if you are not a white dude, you basically just spend years watching mediocre guys get support and opportunities you will never have — no matter how good you may be. And if you can totally detach but not be seen as detaching (because then you are aren't ~ * committed * ~), then I am impressed by your acting skills. But if I have to give you most of my time, company, I don't want to be treading water for the hours I am there. But then, yeah, freelancing is expensive and hard and I reeeeealllly don't like being the business hustler.
So now I am working with two other women to maybe put together a co-op shop, where we can be equal partners and do the things we are good at, socialize risk a little, and maybe actually do cool stuff instead of fighting biased bosses. ~ * D R E A M S * ~
posted by dame at 11:28 AM on May 30, 2016 [3 favorites]
So now I am working with two other women to maybe put together a co-op shop, where we can be equal partners and do the things we are good at, socialize risk a little, and maybe actually do cool stuff instead of fighting biased bosses. ~ * D R E A M S * ~
posted by dame at 11:28 AM on May 30, 2016 [3 favorites]
I was just talking to someone over the weekend about this, in the context of a punk scene that will remain nameless. Very, very often with the people that have "pursued their passion" longterm without penury or complete exhaustion, the enabling force has been family wealth that is not widely known or talked about.
posted by ryanshepard at 11:44 AM on May 30, 2016 [8 favorites]
posted by ryanshepard at 11:44 AM on May 30, 2016 [8 favorites]
PS: Thanks for the quiz! I am a F I R E S T A R T E R.
Me too!
I've had several side and a couple of might have been able to be more businesses over the years. I stopped each one for various reasons. Two of them I did during the summer and one in particular started showing a lot of promise but I decided to not take it to the next level because by then I had enough experience to know what I would be committing myself too time, energy and stress wise.
Now I'm back to pondering doing my own thing again because there are a couple of very particular things I really would like to pursue. I am going to do my best to try to find a workplace that will support this to some extent but at the same time there is a voice in my head working on a plan B of figuring out how to do exactly what I want to do.
posted by Jalliah at 11:44 AM on May 30, 2016
Me too!
I've had several side and a couple of might have been able to be more businesses over the years. I stopped each one for various reasons. Two of them I did during the summer and one in particular started showing a lot of promise but I decided to not take it to the next level because by then I had enough experience to know what I would be committing myself too time, energy and stress wise.
Now I'm back to pondering doing my own thing again because there are a couple of very particular things I really would like to pursue. I am going to do my best to try to find a workplace that will support this to some extent but at the same time there is a voice in my head working on a plan B of figuring out how to do exactly what I want to do.
posted by Jalliah at 11:44 AM on May 30, 2016
I took the quiz. I am a "Not going to give you my email at the last moment, nuh uh!" :(
posted by I-Write-Essays at 11:46 AM on May 30, 2016 [16 favorites]
posted by I-Write-Essays at 11:46 AM on May 30, 2016 [16 favorites]
Obligatory Scalzi post about keeping your day job.
posted by newdaddy at 11:47 AM on May 30, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by newdaddy at 11:47 AM on May 30, 2016 [4 favorites]
You could lie, I-Write-Essays. It is on the next page, not emailed to you.
posted by dame at 11:49 AM on May 30, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by dame at 11:49 AM on May 30, 2016 [3 favorites]
Yeah, thanks for that quiz. Thriver here as well, albeit unsurprisingly. I swear I would be the world's laughably worst self-employed person in the history of, well, ever. Me : internal motivation :: threatened porcupine : cuddliness.
posted by bologna on wry at 11:55 AM on May 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by bologna on wry at 11:55 AM on May 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
I was just talking to someone over the weekend about this, in the context of a punk scene that will remain nameless. Very, very often with the people that have "pursued their passion" longterm without penury or complete exhaustion, the enabling force has been family wealth that is not widely known or talked about.
In my youth I had a big idea, didn't get a summer job after my regular seasonal winter job was over and went for it. Thankfully I had parents that were able to keep me in food and home when after three months my naive enthusiasm hit the wall of reality.
At least I learned that lesson without any real long term damage besides a very small bank loan I had gotten for some equipment. Since then any time I've been doing my own thing it's either been part time, I was with someone who had a stable job.
It's so risky if there is nothing to fall back on if it doesn't work out.
posted by Jalliah at 11:56 AM on May 30, 2016
In my youth I had a big idea, didn't get a summer job after my regular seasonal winter job was over and went for it. Thankfully I had parents that were able to keep me in food and home when after three months my naive enthusiasm hit the wall of reality.
At least I learned that lesson without any real long term damage besides a very small bank loan I had gotten for some equipment. Since then any time I've been doing my own thing it's either been part time, I was with someone who had a stable job.
It's so risky if there is nothing to fall back on if it doesn't work out.
posted by Jalliah at 11:56 AM on May 30, 2016
I'm a little surprised that quiz listed me as a Firestarter, though I definitely recognize the negative part of the description.
posted by Kitteh at 11:56 AM on May 30, 2016
posted by Kitteh at 11:56 AM on May 30, 2016
One of the important features of Obamacare is reducing some of the risks of going out on your own. Previously the biggest threat holding some people back was fear of losing their employer health insurance.
Previously insurers could refuse to insure you at any price if they considered you to be too big a risk. Now, under Obamacare, no insurer can refuse you nor can they charge you a higher rate than anyone else. If the first year or two of your business experiment has low income getting started, then you can receive subsides to help pay for your health insurance.
posted by JackFlash at 12:11 PM on May 30, 2016 [3 favorites]
Previously insurers could refuse to insure you at any price if they considered you to be too big a risk. Now, under Obamacare, no insurer can refuse you nor can they charge you a higher rate than anyone else. If the first year or two of your business experiment has low income getting started, then you can receive subsides to help pay for your health insurance.
posted by JackFlash at 12:11 PM on May 30, 2016 [3 favorites]
There isn't really a penalty. Self-employment tax is actually neatly calculated and adjusted to be exactly equal to the total tax that would be paid if you are doing the same work through a (non-self) employer. The "additional" taxes you are paying are the taxes that were always being paid -- and deducted when your employer figured your gross salary -- all along. (You'd use the word penalties to refer to things like marriage where two people will sometimes pay a higher dollar amount of tax because they're married and than if they weren't, all else equal.)
There's actually more than not likely to be a bonus. If you're someone who has made considerable investments in networking, training, equipment, and so on that your boss hasn't paid or reimbursed, you get a nice tax bonus in pretty much of all of that gets picked up as wholly or partially deductible from the first dollar, rather than being subject to the floor and picky rules for unreimbursed costs of employment.
posted by MattD at 12:12 PM on May 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
There's actually more than not likely to be a bonus. If you're someone who has made considerable investments in networking, training, equipment, and so on that your boss hasn't paid or reimbursed, you get a nice tax bonus in pretty much of all of that gets picked up as wholly or partially deductible from the first dollar, rather than being subject to the floor and picky rules for unreimbursed costs of employment.
posted by MattD at 12:12 PM on May 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
A Business Plan is not a privilege. This narrative lacks one.
posted by lipsum at 1:16 PM on May 30, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by lipsum at 1:16 PM on May 30, 2016 [3 favorites]
Side Hustler!
Kitteh and I went to TCAF a few weeks ago, and as somebody who used to be really into making comics -- and walked away after serial disappointments, largely due to co-creators not fulfilling their end of things -- I suffered a full-blown anxiety attack after we left, having spent four hours looking at people who were literally my peers a decade ago, and who have all gone on to fulfilling full-time creative careers while I work a desk job. A reasonably well-paying, pretty interesting desk job, but even so.
I can't overstate how much this affected me. Letting that side of myself go for full-time office work and really just dropping all things comics felt necessary at the time, and I'm pretty sure it was the right move for me both personally and professionally -- a lot about comics was making me miserable -- but this was, like, full-bore insomnia for two days, self-loathing, just a complete meltdown. It took me a couple of days to remember that I was only seeing the 2% of those peers that actually made it, and most of them were hustling 75% of the time and creating 25% to make ends meet.
Seeing the 2% of the people that make it, and make it work, can really make you feel trapped, though -- shackled to the mortgage, utility bills, feeding the cats, etc. There's literally no way I could ever quit my job to pursue a "passion" full-time. There's not enough savings, and not enough even remote assurance of success.
Even "side hustler" seems like a fun dream. My job takes up 40 hours a week but it's intense and demanding. I don't want to go home and write a novel. I want to play a video game or practice the banjo or make food. I volunteer for three different community orgs because I think what they do is important. I can't even grasp the kind of extra energy I'd need to dig up, or the things I value that I'd have to give up, to start trying to carve out some sort of future-thinking side gig.
Is there a parallel me that went for it and is successful and satisfied? Probably. But I can also see the 95% of Other Mes that are unfulfilled and angry and scrabbling to make ends meet too. My full-time job is a bit like an arranged marriage... there's a lot of good there, and some passion sometimes, and a lot of understanding, and a whole lot of stability. It was never chosen for love, but there's a lot of me wrapped up in it. I definitely don't have the fire to burn it all down and start anew; if I'm honest with myself, I don't think I ever did.
posted by Shepherd at 1:29 PM on May 30, 2016 [16 favorites]
Kitteh and I went to TCAF a few weeks ago, and as somebody who used to be really into making comics -- and walked away after serial disappointments, largely due to co-creators not fulfilling their end of things -- I suffered a full-blown anxiety attack after we left, having spent four hours looking at people who were literally my peers a decade ago, and who have all gone on to fulfilling full-time creative careers while I work a desk job. A reasonably well-paying, pretty interesting desk job, but even so.
I can't overstate how much this affected me. Letting that side of myself go for full-time office work and really just dropping all things comics felt necessary at the time, and I'm pretty sure it was the right move for me both personally and professionally -- a lot about comics was making me miserable -- but this was, like, full-bore insomnia for two days, self-loathing, just a complete meltdown. It took me a couple of days to remember that I was only seeing the 2% of those peers that actually made it, and most of them were hustling 75% of the time and creating 25% to make ends meet.
Seeing the 2% of the people that make it, and make it work, can really make you feel trapped, though -- shackled to the mortgage, utility bills, feeding the cats, etc. There's literally no way I could ever quit my job to pursue a "passion" full-time. There's not enough savings, and not enough even remote assurance of success.
Even "side hustler" seems like a fun dream. My job takes up 40 hours a week but it's intense and demanding. I don't want to go home and write a novel. I want to play a video game or practice the banjo or make food. I volunteer for three different community orgs because I think what they do is important. I can't even grasp the kind of extra energy I'd need to dig up, or the things I value that I'd have to give up, to start trying to carve out some sort of future-thinking side gig.
Is there a parallel me that went for it and is successful and satisfied? Probably. But I can also see the 95% of Other Mes that are unfulfilled and angry and scrabbling to make ends meet too. My full-time job is a bit like an arranged marriage... there's a lot of good there, and some passion sometimes, and a lot of understanding, and a whole lot of stability. It was never chosen for love, but there's a lot of me wrapped up in it. I definitely don't have the fire to burn it all down and start anew; if I'm honest with myself, I don't think I ever did.
posted by Shepherd at 1:29 PM on May 30, 2016 [16 favorites]
Wow, that quiz nailed some stuff pretty hard. I too am a thriver. Every so often I dream of running a bookshop or small
cozy coffee shop but I know how much work it would take and how much I don't know about what I would need to make it work.
posted by PussKillian at 2:07 PM on May 30, 2016
cozy coffee shop but I know how much work it would take and how much I don't know about what I would need to make it work.
posted by PussKillian at 2:07 PM on May 30, 2016
I'm self-employed as a vintage clothing dealer, and I also have a bunch of side hustles-- making comics, crafts, writing. I can really only make it work because the shop in is shared by two other women.(dame, memail me if you have questions about co-op shops!)
If I had to be at the shop every day I couldn't make it work: I wouldn't even have time to source stock, much less do any of the creative stuff I like. The three of us split up the staffing, though, so it works okay. I want to start my own vintage shop someday, but I know I'll never do it unless I find someone I'd trust as a business partner.
posted by nonasuch at 3:25 PM on May 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
If I had to be at the shop every day I couldn't make it work: I wouldn't even have time to source stock, much less do any of the creative stuff I like. The three of us split up the staffing, though, so it works okay. I want to start my own vintage shop someday, but I know I'll never do it unless I find someone I'd trust as a business partner.
posted by nonasuch at 3:25 PM on May 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
I took the quiz. I am a "Not going to give you my email at the last moment, nuh uh!" :(
You are clearly then also not a "Read Everything Before You Start"-er either. :) They warn you up front.
posted by salvia at 3:43 PM on May 30, 2016
You are clearly then also not a "Read Everything Before You Start"-er either. :) They warn you up front.
posted by salvia at 3:43 PM on May 30, 2016
Risky: Do what you love
Realistic: Do what you are good at.
posted by ohshenandoah at 4:21 PM on May 30, 2016
Realistic: Do what you are good at.
posted by ohshenandoah at 4:21 PM on May 30, 2016
Sheperd, you are pretty much nailing the feeling I get sometimes when I see people I knew from theater, or who wrote now and then when we were in our 20s, go on to some successes. Theater especially - I busted my ass for ten years, and so did a friend of mine, and after those ten years, we both just started feeling like there was a law of diminishing returns thing happening, and realized "you know, I want to do other things."
And when I see people I used to work with who've gone on to be on TV and in movies and stuff, or people who were stage managing at the same time I was go on to their first major long-term Broadway gig, I'm bitter - but then I remind myself that it's not like I was exactly sitting around on my ass for ten years. And I remind myself of the advantages that those same people had that I didn't, like indulgent spouses or major luck.
I burned out before I could get any further than an off-Broadway run and my name in the New York Times review under "staff", but at least I did burn to the full. All we can do is the most we can do at any given moment.
That's also comforting me in the writing now. I've been going through a couple years of just not being as verbose, and recently I've started treating that by treating what I think is the cause - a long stretch of exhaustion, bad luck, and trying-to-keep-my-shit-together tunnel vision. I'm more able to actually poke my head up and have some god-damn FUN for a change, and I'm focusing on that instead, with the assumption that maybe it's going to fill a well back up that just ran dry for a while. And even if it doesn't - well, it's okay to enjoy life too.
In fact, that's something that stayed with me when I watched Jennifer Aniston's episode of Inside the Actors' Studio. One of the audience members asked her what advice she had for someone who was about to graduate, and she answered that one big thing she recommended was to get a day job. "I mean, I know you're going to be working hard on the acting, and going to auditions and stuff," she said, "but that's going to take time, and in the meantime, you also need to enjoy yourself, you know?" I actually found it here - it's at 40:15.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 5:02 PM on May 30, 2016 [3 favorites]
And when I see people I used to work with who've gone on to be on TV and in movies and stuff, or people who were stage managing at the same time I was go on to their first major long-term Broadway gig, I'm bitter - but then I remind myself that it's not like I was exactly sitting around on my ass for ten years. And I remind myself of the advantages that those same people had that I didn't, like indulgent spouses or major luck.
I burned out before I could get any further than an off-Broadway run and my name in the New York Times review under "staff", but at least I did burn to the full. All we can do is the most we can do at any given moment.
That's also comforting me in the writing now. I've been going through a couple years of just not being as verbose, and recently I've started treating that by treating what I think is the cause - a long stretch of exhaustion, bad luck, and trying-to-keep-my-shit-together tunnel vision. I'm more able to actually poke my head up and have some god-damn FUN for a change, and I'm focusing on that instead, with the assumption that maybe it's going to fill a well back up that just ran dry for a while. And even if it doesn't - well, it's okay to enjoy life too.
In fact, that's something that stayed with me when I watched Jennifer Aniston's episode of Inside the Actors' Studio. One of the audience members asked her what advice she had for someone who was about to graduate, and she answered that one big thing she recommended was to get a day job. "I mean, I know you're going to be working hard on the acting, and going to auditions and stuff," she said, "but that's going to take time, and in the meantime, you also need to enjoy yourself, you know?" I actually found it here - it's at 40:15.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 5:02 PM on May 30, 2016 [3 favorites]
The author of Steal Like an Artist, Austin Kleon (disclosure: he's a client) has some pretty pointed and interesting comments on this topic.
posted by twsf at 5:09 PM on May 30, 2016
posted by twsf at 5:09 PM on May 30, 2016
I dropped out of the world of financial security to pursue my creative job full-time. My life now has meaning and I'm no longer depressed and embarrassed to be alive. And it has never, not once, occurred to me to suggest this path for anyone else. I was perfectly well aware of what the likely outcome was to be (and so far it has been) and I was willing to live with those consequences. I wouldn't expect anyone to be so willing. And it doesn't make me a hero of the American Dream or some great romantic figure. I did what I had to do to survive. It's hard to imagine but being homeless pursuing my music is better for me than working any job for any organization no matter what it is. Period.
So yeah, if you are willing to give up everything (not just a calculated risk with fall-backs, but actually give up everything) then there are some amazing rewards (even if money ain't one of 'em). But I can't imagine too many people are in that same position.
That said having this story has helped me out on occasion. While I am homeless and eat at soup kitchens, because I'm a "starving artist" many people don't see me as a lazy bum and that opens a few doors for me. It's a form of privilege I didn't expect (of course I did expect privilege from being a well-educated white male). My point is that even while mostly destitute that romantic notion the author was arguing against is still present. It's weird and I don't know what to think about it but it's definitely there. And I use it. And I feel weird about it.
But yeah, there is no one perfect position to take on this issue. It's not the Romantic Be-All Dream that people assume it is but it's also not the worst thing to do it while being extremely poor. It depends on the person and their circumstances (I have no SO nor children nor pets, ie, no responsibilities to anyone but myself).
An interesting thing is that when someone fails (or hasn't reached success yet) we shake our heads at their stupidity for risking everything on this fool's dream. But when that same person succeeds all of a sudden they are a Hero whose commitment to their dream is something we should all aspire to. But it's the same damn person. No different from when they were "failing" to when they became financially successful. It's we on the outside who build these bullshit narratives.
posted by bfootdav at 5:24 PM on May 30, 2016 [6 favorites]
So yeah, if you are willing to give up everything (not just a calculated risk with fall-backs, but actually give up everything) then there are some amazing rewards (even if money ain't one of 'em). But I can't imagine too many people are in that same position.
That said having this story has helped me out on occasion. While I am homeless and eat at soup kitchens, because I'm a "starving artist" many people don't see me as a lazy bum and that opens a few doors for me. It's a form of privilege I didn't expect (of course I did expect privilege from being a well-educated white male). My point is that even while mostly destitute that romantic notion the author was arguing against is still present. It's weird and I don't know what to think about it but it's definitely there. And I use it. And I feel weird about it.
But yeah, there is no one perfect position to take on this issue. It's not the Romantic Be-All Dream that people assume it is but it's also not the worst thing to do it while being extremely poor. It depends on the person and their circumstances (I have no SO nor children nor pets, ie, no responsibilities to anyone but myself).
An interesting thing is that when someone fails (or hasn't reached success yet) we shake our heads at their stupidity for risking everything on this fool's dream. But when that same person succeeds all of a sudden they are a Hero whose commitment to their dream is something we should all aspire to. But it's the same damn person. No different from when they were "failing" to when they became financially successful. It's we on the outside who build these bullshit narratives.
posted by bfootdav at 5:24 PM on May 30, 2016 [6 favorites]
For the past eight years, I've been working an extremely dull day job. It pays enough to, with my spouse, keep us and our child more or less middle class in the USA. I do this job even though it is absurd and boring because it is also extremely easy for me, and I can spend my mental resources on the things I care about, viz short fantasy/horror fiction and board games, neither of which are viable sources of income. If I lived in my ideal world, I'd be writing for a living and hosting board game nights every weekend. I do not, and so we continue.
Whenever I feel like disparaging my day job, I remind myself that self-actualization in work is a relatively recent thing, and up until a handful of decades ago, people did day jobs (sometimes any day job) so that they simply did not die. That helps me a bit with the tension between working for the man and wanting to be a wholly self-directed individual. The tension is real, but I sometimes feel that life is morphing in a direction where if I'm not careful, I'll lose gratitude for things that people for millennia never used to take for granted. (And I happen to really like my day job.)
posted by SpacemanStix at 5:45 PM on May 30, 2016 [3 favorites]
Whenever I feel like disparaging my day job, I remind myself that self-actualization in work is a relatively recent thing, and up until a handful of decades ago, people did day jobs (sometimes any day job) so that they simply did not die. That helps me a bit with the tension between working for the man and wanting to be a wholly self-directed individual. The tension is real, but I sometimes feel that life is morphing in a direction where if I'm not careful, I'll lose gratitude for things that people for millennia never used to take for granted. (And I happen to really like my day job.)
posted by SpacemanStix at 5:45 PM on May 30, 2016 [3 favorites]
I went out to dinner with my two younger sisters a few months ago and when I asked the youngest if she was having any fun at her job, she said, "It's work. It's not supposed to be fun." And I realised I had wasted most of my adult life attempting to do the "follow your passion" thing with mild to zero success. And then I found a job job that lets me do my creative stuff (or not) during the long commute. This is only a temporary gig and the commute is a killer and yet, I love it because it doesn't own me body and soul the way every other job has. I wish I'd figured out the BS part of the follow-your-passion thing years ago.
posted by Bella Donna at 5:59 PM on May 30, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by Bella Donna at 5:59 PM on May 30, 2016 [3 favorites]
the last part of this article had me completely scratching my head:
And I’m not saying working class people can’t be successful entrepreneurs. I’m just saying if you haven’t read something that mentions the privileges of the self-employed, inspiring, brave, courageous entrepreneurial class that pursues their passion, then here it is.
WTF? Working class people are more likely to be entrepreneurs - just not in the kind of creative freelance follow-your-passion jobs the author is talking about. Your plumber? More than likely owns his/her own business, or is working for a small business now and will strike out on their own after they gain enough experience. Your carpet cleaner? Very, very likely to be a one-person-and-a-truck business (Even if you call a national company like Stanley Steamer or Servpro, those trucks are franchises, and again the person that comes to your house often owns that franchised truck) Every decent mechanic I've ever known does side work for their friends out of their driveway on their days off.
posted by antimony at 6:08 PM on May 30, 2016 [4 favorites]
And I’m not saying working class people can’t be successful entrepreneurs. I’m just saying if you haven’t read something that mentions the privileges of the self-employed, inspiring, brave, courageous entrepreneurial class that pursues their passion, then here it is.
WTF? Working class people are more likely to be entrepreneurs - just not in the kind of creative freelance follow-your-passion jobs the author is talking about. Your plumber? More than likely owns his/her own business, or is working for a small business now and will strike out on their own after they gain enough experience. Your carpet cleaner? Very, very likely to be a one-person-and-a-truck business (Even if you call a national company like Stanley Steamer or Servpro, those trucks are franchises, and again the person that comes to your house often owns that franchised truck) Every decent mechanic I've ever known does side work for their friends out of their driveway on their days off.
posted by antimony at 6:08 PM on May 30, 2016 [4 favorites]
Wow, that quiz nailed some stuff pretty hard.
I know, I feel like it completely nailed how being a Virgo like, connects. You know?
Sorry to be sarcastic, but taking that I felt like all the questions answers were for manic type"A"r's and didn't relate to a single one. Some of them actually made me feel gross.
And then results really did speak to me... then I changed the URL and those results also really spoke to me.
posted by mayonnaises at 6:59 PM on May 30, 2016 [2 favorites]
I know, I feel like it completely nailed how being a Virgo like, connects. You know?
Sorry to be sarcastic, but taking that I felt like all the questions answers were for manic type"A"r's and didn't relate to a single one. Some of them actually made me feel gross.
And then results really did speak to me... then I changed the URL and those results also really spoke to me.
posted by mayonnaises at 6:59 PM on May 30, 2016 [2 favorites]
The whole 'follow your passion' thing is great... for the people who need to hire people like you, because you're the one making the compromises: it's you who's lowering your fee by skipping out on paying your health insurance; it's you who's lowering your fee by skipping out on paying your worker's compensation premiums; it's you who's lowering your fee by skipping out on paying your public liability insurance, superannuation... and so on and so forth. All of these decisions and protections that would - and should - normally be handled by an employer have to be dealt with by you, and you are the one who is refining your fee to make your rates attractive to potential clients by removing those protections. Governments are complicit in removing those protections for sole traders, but you explicitly give them up, just by nature of needing the damn work to survive.
I mean, I am lucky that I'm in Australia, and a basic level of healthcare and workers compensation is (currently) available. But the fact remains that I am contracted by clients who are unwilling (or unable, let's be honest) to employ me at what would be a sustainable rate for me. I am a sound designer for theatre, at the nominated-for-awards, peer-review panel, mentoring-juniors near-pinnacle of what I can possibly do in this industry, but in order to eat and have a home, I'm still accepting jobs that pay A$350 for four weeks of work including multiple 14-hour days, and not less than 40 minutes of my original intellectual property (an LP worth, really). And that was presented by one of the so-called Major Performing Arts Group of companies.
I get that there is a really good argument being made about 'following your passion' being poisonous because of instability, and competition, and it's not an easy thing. But the reason its competitive and unstable is because the kind of people who use your services are trying to avoid paying you, because they don't have to pay for all the stuff you need, just the stuff they want.
posted by prismatic7 at 7:25 PM on May 30, 2016
I mean, I am lucky that I'm in Australia, and a basic level of healthcare and workers compensation is (currently) available. But the fact remains that I am contracted by clients who are unwilling (or unable, let's be honest) to employ me at what would be a sustainable rate for me. I am a sound designer for theatre, at the nominated-for-awards, peer-review panel, mentoring-juniors near-pinnacle of what I can possibly do in this industry, but in order to eat and have a home, I'm still accepting jobs that pay A$350 for four weeks of work including multiple 14-hour days, and not less than 40 minutes of my original intellectual property (an LP worth, really). And that was presented by one of the so-called Major Performing Arts Group of companies.
I get that there is a really good argument being made about 'following your passion' being poisonous because of instability, and competition, and it's not an easy thing. But the reason its competitive and unstable is because the kind of people who use your services are trying to avoid paying you, because they don't have to pay for all the stuff you need, just the stuff they want.
posted by prismatic7 at 7:25 PM on May 30, 2016
Bleh, I'm so tired of everything having to be framed in absolutes. Surely there's some middle ground between "interchangeable cog doing completely meaningless work in exchange for security" and "fingerpainting nudist backpacker dying of consumption for lack of health insurance", right? I have an office job that is at times heavily bureaucratic, but I love it because it's mentally stimulating and I get to help people. These are things I am passionate about! Hmm, I actually don't really remember if this comment had an actual point but I feel very fortunate. I guess part of what makes me excited about the work I do is that it's real, not a fantasy I need to chase after.
posted by threeants at 7:30 PM on May 30, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by threeants at 7:30 PM on May 30, 2016 [2 favorites]
The key to all this is that you need to be looking for a skill set that makes it difficult to fire you
No, you need a skill set that makes it easy for you to find another job. A portable skill set is the best skill set.
Not being an asshole to your coworkers generally also helps.
This is absolutely true. Future jobs will be had from networking and if past coworkers liked working with you, the job hunt is much easier.
posted by LoveHam at 8:31 PM on May 30, 2016
No, you need a skill set that makes it easy for you to find another job. A portable skill set is the best skill set.
Not being an asshole to your coworkers generally also helps.
This is absolutely true. Future jobs will be had from networking and if past coworkers liked working with you, the job hunt is much easier.
posted by LoveHam at 8:31 PM on May 30, 2016
I came out as a Firestarter and I don't think it fits me. So....???
posted by jenfullmoon at 9:41 PM on May 30, 2016
posted by jenfullmoon at 9:41 PM on May 30, 2016
As some Mefites know, I started a business, and as most of them know, it folded. Twice, actually. It's a brutal, incredibly difficult thing, but it's easily the best thing I've ever done.
Essentially I came to the realization that, at least in Japan, the only other thing I can do aside from teaching English is cook, and I was incredibly burnt out on teaching, so I followed the dream of every immigrant, and I opened up a restaurant serving the food of my people, namely burgers, hot dogs, and barbecue. We were shockingly, absurdly successful in that we were operating at a profit in the first month or so. Not crazy, we're going to be rich profitable, but holy shit, I think this is going to work out profitable. Like, we can pay all of our bills and even start to save some money or think about hiring staff type money. We had a positive review in the Japan Times. We had word of mouth. Hell, we even had IRL meet ups (I mean, seriously, I got to host MeFi meet ups in my reataurant, it was awesome).
And then we got told that the complex we had our shop in was going to be torn down. We were there for only three and a half months, and then nothing. Not nothing, honestly, because we learned an absolute ton from what we did.
Unfortunately, we didn't have the money to start fresh again. We (foolishly) threw in with another refugee from the complex and sat back in horror as he decided to open in a completely different area of Tokyo in an utterly different sort of shop space, with absolutely no realistic long term plans in place. Some of our customers followed us, but not enough. We started to build a new customer base, but not fast enough. We even had more meetups, which was also pretty awesome. But finally, we had to call it quits. We weren't making enough, and the place was pretty clearly circling the drain.
Again, I learned a lot, but the end result is that I'm broke, and back to teaching English. I'm lucky as hell that I managed to get back into a decent job, as there aren't many to go around these days, but it's unlikely that I'll have the chance to open another restaurant.
Running my own place was more work than I've ever done, but it also taught me to be much, much more efficient with my time than I've ever been. It taught me to seriously study and explore the actual best ways to do things, and I'm slightly terrified that it's ruined me as an employee. I see people in charge making hideous choices, things that I know have no chance in hell of working, and I can't keep my mouth shut, and yeah, it's gotten me in more than enough trouble since I started being an employee again.
The one thing that I never expected to be odd or difficult to deal with again is free time. I honestly don't know what to do with myself after work anymore. When I ran my own place, there was no after work, there was no real down time, and now that there is, I'm mystified by it.
I was lucky enough in the first place to be able to save up the money to start off. Mrs. Ghidorah and I don't have any children, and we realized that if we were successful, raising a kid in a restaurant might not be the best thing. Now that we've failed, and are broke, well, we couldn't afford a kid now. It strained our relationship, estranged me from some friends, and was financially ruinous. It was, again, also the best thing I've ever done, but a hell of a lot more work than any job where I've been an employee, as well as terrifying and exhausting.
Tl/dr: self employment is a land of contrasts.
posted by Ghidorah at 10:13 PM on May 30, 2016 [4 favorites]
Essentially I came to the realization that, at least in Japan, the only other thing I can do aside from teaching English is cook, and I was incredibly burnt out on teaching, so I followed the dream of every immigrant, and I opened up a restaurant serving the food of my people, namely burgers, hot dogs, and barbecue. We were shockingly, absurdly successful in that we were operating at a profit in the first month or so. Not crazy, we're going to be rich profitable, but holy shit, I think this is going to work out profitable. Like, we can pay all of our bills and even start to save some money or think about hiring staff type money. We had a positive review in the Japan Times. We had word of mouth. Hell, we even had IRL meet ups (I mean, seriously, I got to host MeFi meet ups in my reataurant, it was awesome).
And then we got told that the complex we had our shop in was going to be torn down. We were there for only three and a half months, and then nothing. Not nothing, honestly, because we learned an absolute ton from what we did.
Unfortunately, we didn't have the money to start fresh again. We (foolishly) threw in with another refugee from the complex and sat back in horror as he decided to open in a completely different area of Tokyo in an utterly different sort of shop space, with absolutely no realistic long term plans in place. Some of our customers followed us, but not enough. We started to build a new customer base, but not fast enough. We even had more meetups, which was also pretty awesome. But finally, we had to call it quits. We weren't making enough, and the place was pretty clearly circling the drain.
Again, I learned a lot, but the end result is that I'm broke, and back to teaching English. I'm lucky as hell that I managed to get back into a decent job, as there aren't many to go around these days, but it's unlikely that I'll have the chance to open another restaurant.
Running my own place was more work than I've ever done, but it also taught me to be much, much more efficient with my time than I've ever been. It taught me to seriously study and explore the actual best ways to do things, and I'm slightly terrified that it's ruined me as an employee. I see people in charge making hideous choices, things that I know have no chance in hell of working, and I can't keep my mouth shut, and yeah, it's gotten me in more than enough trouble since I started being an employee again.
The one thing that I never expected to be odd or difficult to deal with again is free time. I honestly don't know what to do with myself after work anymore. When I ran my own place, there was no after work, there was no real down time, and now that there is, I'm mystified by it.
I was lucky enough in the first place to be able to save up the money to start off. Mrs. Ghidorah and I don't have any children, and we realized that if we were successful, raising a kid in a restaurant might not be the best thing. Now that we've failed, and are broke, well, we couldn't afford a kid now. It strained our relationship, estranged me from some friends, and was financially ruinous. It was, again, also the best thing I've ever done, but a hell of a lot more work than any job where I've been an employee, as well as terrifying and exhausting.
Tl/dr: self employment is a land of contrasts.
posted by Ghidorah at 10:13 PM on May 30, 2016 [4 favorites]
So now I am working with two other women to maybe put together a co-op shop, where we can be equal partners and do the things we are good at, socialize risk a little, and maybe actually do cool stuff instead of fighting biased bosses. ~ * D R E A M S * ~
Yes, this may work out, or it may not, depending on the people that you decide to team up with. I've been through both.
You say "equl partners" and "socializing risk". What does that mean? Does that mean that you divide your profits equally (= socialism?) Or does everyone get a profit that corresponds to what they earned for the company (= capitalism?)
Both models are fine, but pose different problems. In the socialism model, you may run into the problem that people have different productivity. If there are just two of you, that may be fine, but if there are three or more, the likelihood increases that the productivity differential is such that the most productive partner brings in twice or more money than the least productive one. The most productive one may then question why everyone should be paid equally, or may eventually move on for greener pastures.
This is, of course, solvable, by employing the other model (you eat what you hunt). But there the problem often is that the most productive person will also use up most of the resources. So the other partners may wonder whether it is really necessary e.g. to hire a new secretary, buy a new copy machine etc. etc.
Anyway, there are also hybrid models and all these problems are solvable, if you work together with the right people, which is really the key. Unfortunately, it may take a year or so to find out. The worst thing that can happen is that you partner up with someone who has severe personal problems that are not visible in the beginning (e.g. he/she may be an alcoholic, a psychopath, etc.)
posted by sour cream at 1:36 AM on May 31, 2016 [2 favorites]
Yes, this may work out, or it may not, depending on the people that you decide to team up with. I've been through both.
You say "equl partners" and "socializing risk". What does that mean? Does that mean that you divide your profits equally (= socialism?) Or does everyone get a profit that corresponds to what they earned for the company (= capitalism?)
Both models are fine, but pose different problems. In the socialism model, you may run into the problem that people have different productivity. If there are just two of you, that may be fine, but if there are three or more, the likelihood increases that the productivity differential is such that the most productive partner brings in twice or more money than the least productive one. The most productive one may then question why everyone should be paid equally, or may eventually move on for greener pastures.
This is, of course, solvable, by employing the other model (you eat what you hunt). But there the problem often is that the most productive person will also use up most of the resources. So the other partners may wonder whether it is really necessary e.g. to hire a new secretary, buy a new copy machine etc. etc.
Anyway, there are also hybrid models and all these problems are solvable, if you work together with the right people, which is really the key. Unfortunately, it may take a year or so to find out. The worst thing that can happen is that you partner up with someone who has severe personal problems that are not visible in the beginning (e.g. he/she may be an alcoholic, a psychopath, etc.)
posted by sour cream at 1:36 AM on May 31, 2016 [2 favorites]
The worst thing that can happen is that you partner up with someone who has severe personal problems that are not visible in the beginning
Yeah, that. You need to be able to deeply trust that the person you partner with, if you have to, is stable, not evil, and not going to screw you over. You need marriage level trust in a business relationship, even moreso, because the person you run the business with is just a business partner, and there most likely no real emotional ties that would make them pause if they decided to do horrible things.
It's hard to know what is going on in another person's mind. If you get even the slightest, tiniest small voice in your head warning you away from a person, if there are any red flags, run the other way. Even more importantly, and a lesson I learned the hard way, never let your self get to the point where there's no other choice that working with someone like that. It doesn't work out.
posted by Ghidorah at 4:02 AM on May 31, 2016 [1 favorite]
Yeah, that. You need to be able to deeply trust that the person you partner with, if you have to, is stable, not evil, and not going to screw you over. You need marriage level trust in a business relationship, even moreso, because the person you run the business with is just a business partner, and there most likely no real emotional ties that would make them pause if they decided to do horrible things.
It's hard to know what is going on in another person's mind. If you get even the slightest, tiniest small voice in your head warning you away from a person, if there are any red flags, run the other way. Even more importantly, and a lesson I learned the hard way, never let your self get to the point where there's no other choice that working with someone like that. It doesn't work out.
posted by Ghidorah at 4:02 AM on May 31, 2016 [1 favorite]
Bella Donna: I went out to dinner with my two younger sisters a few months ago and when I asked the youngest if she was having any fun at her job, she said, "It's work. It's not supposed to be fun."
Yep. Work is the contribution we make for the benefit of other people, to help provide things they want and need. And they're doing the same thing for us. A lot of it is going to be boring or unrewarding, because there are a lot of boring and unrewarding things that need to be done in the course of creating and building and transporting and selling and organizing and growing and harvesting and servicing and financing and inspiring and comforting and healing.
That's what they pay us for. Other people pay us to do some of the shitwork that makes the good things they value possible. We pay other people for the shitwork they've done that makes what we value possible.
If you find a job that you can tolerate doing all day, every day, you're reasonably lucky. If you find a job you love that pays you well enough to live on, you're incredibly lucky.
posted by clawsoon at 5:16 AM on May 31, 2016 [1 favorite]
Yep. Work is the contribution we make for the benefit of other people, to help provide things they want and need. And they're doing the same thing for us. A lot of it is going to be boring or unrewarding, because there are a lot of boring and unrewarding things that need to be done in the course of creating and building and transporting and selling and organizing and growing and harvesting and servicing and financing and inspiring and comforting and healing.
That's what they pay us for. Other people pay us to do some of the shitwork that makes the good things they value possible. We pay other people for the shitwork they've done that makes what we value possible.
If you find a job that you can tolerate doing all day, every day, you're reasonably lucky. If you find a job you love that pays you well enough to live on, you're incredibly lucky.
posted by clawsoon at 5:16 AM on May 31, 2016 [1 favorite]
I haven't read the whole thread, but I will do later. First though, I want to share some thoughts on the topic before I digest it all.
I handed in my notice at my mostly-tolerable day job a couple of weeks ago, and I have another 4 weeks to work. I have nothing lined up. I have been here for over 6 years. I've very much been doing the whole "work-to-live" thing for years, heavily influenced but the advice I received here, plus the generally accepted MeFi wisdom displayed whenever the topic comes up, including here.
For the most part, it's good advice. Not all of us are these mythical "self-starters", entrepreneurs, or whatever the latest buzzword is. Most of us want to just show up, do the job, get paid, and go home. I'm very much one of those people when it comes to work. I hate stress, financial uncertainty, and working any more than absolutely necessary.
So I tolerated my job for years, told myself I would pursue the things that really interest me in my spare time. And I did, I achieved a lot and had a lot of fun creatively without having to "monetise" it. That suited me.
But over time, I also got more and more stressed, depressed, and frustrated. As much as I tried not to let it get to me, the work beat me down. I gave up. It was impossible to be on top of things. Like sweeping leaves on a windy day, as they say. Organisational disfunction became personal disfunction. I got sloppy. I was late nearly every day. I was "disciplined" for it. You know how it goes: no carrot, all stick.
Eventually, and once back on meds, I decided I'd rather quit than get fired. In truth I was a long way from being fired, but I couldn't live with this sword of Damocles hanging over my head. But I don't like to burn bridges, so I made clear that I wanted it to end amicably, and they were very reasonable about it. At least this way, I still get a reference out of it.
Anyway, the long and short of it is that I accept the MeFi wisdom on the topic is "don't give up the day job", but sometimes the best advice is also "DTMFA".
Of course I can only make this decision now because I have been frugal with my meager salary for years, have no debt and few obligations, and have had this at the back of my mind for years. I took all I could take and waited as long as I could wait.
I have no idea what comes next but I feel optimistic for the first time in years. I don't have any delusions about pursuing my passion and becoming successful. I'll go back to bartending if I have to. The industry I'm in is a decade away from being automated out of existence anyway. I feel like I'm getting out while I can. But I'm one of the lucky ones.
I don't want to be my own boss. I don't want there to be any bosses at all. I want universal income so that people aren't put through all of this for marginal economic benefit. Let someone who cares have this job, and let me do what I care about without having to worry about money all the time. I'm tired of food and shelter coming with strings attached. It's the 21st Century for crying out loud.
We get told these things are not "realistic" or "sustainable", but our current economic predicament isn't either. It's all such a massive waste of human potential, and it's destroying the planet in the process. It's the status quo that's broken, not us.
posted by Acey at 5:25 AM on May 31, 2016 [4 favorites]
I handed in my notice at my mostly-tolerable day job a couple of weeks ago, and I have another 4 weeks to work. I have nothing lined up. I have been here for over 6 years. I've very much been doing the whole "work-to-live" thing for years, heavily influenced but the advice I received here, plus the generally accepted MeFi wisdom displayed whenever the topic comes up, including here.
For the most part, it's good advice. Not all of us are these mythical "self-starters", entrepreneurs, or whatever the latest buzzword is. Most of us want to just show up, do the job, get paid, and go home. I'm very much one of those people when it comes to work. I hate stress, financial uncertainty, and working any more than absolutely necessary.
So I tolerated my job for years, told myself I would pursue the things that really interest me in my spare time. And I did, I achieved a lot and had a lot of fun creatively without having to "monetise" it. That suited me.
But over time, I also got more and more stressed, depressed, and frustrated. As much as I tried not to let it get to me, the work beat me down. I gave up. It was impossible to be on top of things. Like sweeping leaves on a windy day, as they say. Organisational disfunction became personal disfunction. I got sloppy. I was late nearly every day. I was "disciplined" for it. You know how it goes: no carrot, all stick.
Eventually, and once back on meds, I decided I'd rather quit than get fired. In truth I was a long way from being fired, but I couldn't live with this sword of Damocles hanging over my head. But I don't like to burn bridges, so I made clear that I wanted it to end amicably, and they were very reasonable about it. At least this way, I still get a reference out of it.
Anyway, the long and short of it is that I accept the MeFi wisdom on the topic is "don't give up the day job", but sometimes the best advice is also "DTMFA".
Of course I can only make this decision now because I have been frugal with my meager salary for years, have no debt and few obligations, and have had this at the back of my mind for years. I took all I could take and waited as long as I could wait.
I have no idea what comes next but I feel optimistic for the first time in years. I don't have any delusions about pursuing my passion and becoming successful. I'll go back to bartending if I have to. The industry I'm in is a decade away from being automated out of existence anyway. I feel like I'm getting out while I can. But I'm one of the lucky ones.
I don't want to be my own boss. I don't want there to be any bosses at all. I want universal income so that people aren't put through all of this for marginal economic benefit. Let someone who cares have this job, and let me do what I care about without having to worry about money all the time. I'm tired of food and shelter coming with strings attached. It's the 21st Century for crying out loud.
We get told these things are not "realistic" or "sustainable", but our current economic predicament isn't either. It's all such a massive waste of human potential, and it's destroying the planet in the process. It's the status quo that's broken, not us.
posted by Acey at 5:25 AM on May 31, 2016 [4 favorites]
I've been wrestling with this stuff in my mind a lot lately. I am a graphic designer and have been so since college. I suppose it's good(?) that I have maintained the same career for 20 years. I don't really have an impressive portfolio. Mostly just a series of dull corporate jobs. But still, it provides room and board and insurance for my son.
But I am so bored. I try to look on the bright side of having my basic needs met. It's hard to keep that in mind though when I'm sitting under fluorescent lights at an ikea desk and I'm so bored I want to scream.
I think the thing that's most frustrating about it is that I could quit and go freelance, but for the health insurance for my son. My wife's job doesn't provide it. Going on obamacare is pretty expensive when you have a kid with allergies and prescriptions.
At least my boss is reasonable and I like my coworker who I share an office with. My company is decent, and the benefits are average, for corporate work. And so, I count my blessings, I guess. But thinking "it could be a lot worse" is cold comfort. I was unemployed several years ago. It's hard to enjoy hanging out at home when you have crushing anxiety about your bills.
posted by Fleebnork at 5:57 AM on May 31, 2016 [1 favorite]
But I am so bored. I try to look on the bright side of having my basic needs met. It's hard to keep that in mind though when I'm sitting under fluorescent lights at an ikea desk and I'm so bored I want to scream.
I think the thing that's most frustrating about it is that I could quit and go freelance, but for the health insurance for my son. My wife's job doesn't provide it. Going on obamacare is pretty expensive when you have a kid with allergies and prescriptions.
At least my boss is reasonable and I like my coworker who I share an office with. My company is decent, and the benefits are average, for corporate work. And so, I count my blessings, I guess. But thinking "it could be a lot worse" is cold comfort. I was unemployed several years ago. It's hard to enjoy hanging out at home when you have crushing anxiety about your bills.
posted by Fleebnork at 5:57 AM on May 31, 2016 [1 favorite]
In case what I wrote above seems confusing, when I say that I have maintained the same career and also was unemployed, I just mean that I was seeking another graphic design job, and I've not changed career tracks like many of my friends. I don't know if thats meaningful or not.
posted by Fleebnork at 6:01 AM on May 31, 2016
posted by Fleebnork at 6:01 AM on May 31, 2016
I can't express how much I disagree with the whole "It's work; it's not meant to be fun" approach. Very similar to "life isn't supposed to be fair" in the way it dismisses people's calls for equality and dignity. Sure, sometimes you do tedious things in any job you love, in the service of something you want to achieve. But when you believe in the values and the goals of the project, and when you believe your effort is appreciated, that tedium isn't terrible.
I have a friend who was a janitor in in college, and during the time he took off in the course of completing his degree. It remains one of his favorite jobs — not because he was well remunerated, not because he got a lot of social applause, and not because he particularly likes cleaning. It was great because his boss was great; he appreciated him, respected him, and treated him fairly. We deserve to demand this from anyone we are working for, whether it is ourselves or others. "Service" doesn't mean eating whatever shit people throw at you and frankly, there is no amount of money that makes it okay to treat people badly (imo, obvs).
I believe we can accomplish anything we need to as a society, while also treating one another with respect and dignity. And not just tell one another to suck it up "because that's what they money is for."
(This is not meant to be an attack on people, btw, but I would like to encourage you to consider how we should and can demand better, while also doing things that don't seem fun on the surface.)
posted by dame at 1:26 PM on May 31, 2016 [5 favorites]
I have a friend who was a janitor in in college, and during the time he took off in the course of completing his degree. It remains one of his favorite jobs — not because he was well remunerated, not because he got a lot of social applause, and not because he particularly likes cleaning. It was great because his boss was great; he appreciated him, respected him, and treated him fairly. We deserve to demand this from anyone we are working for, whether it is ourselves or others. "Service" doesn't mean eating whatever shit people throw at you and frankly, there is no amount of money that makes it okay to treat people badly (imo, obvs).
I believe we can accomplish anything we need to as a society, while also treating one another with respect and dignity. And not just tell one another to suck it up "because that's what they money is for."
(This is not meant to be an attack on people, btw, but I would like to encourage you to consider how we should and can demand better, while also doing things that don't seem fun on the surface.)
posted by dame at 1:26 PM on May 31, 2016 [5 favorites]
A then-current-now-ex-girlfriend of mine has followed her bliss twice. She built a great business then realized she didn't like and wasn't good at running a business. It was a non-profit so she coudn't sell it. At age 49 she quit her job to travel around the country until she figured out what she wanted to do with her life. She got a new boyfriend on the road and a new job just before she ran out of money and maxed out her credit cards.
A year later, after the new boyfriend left, she quit her new job because she wanted to be her own boss again. But she didn't have any plan of what to do. Last I heard she was out of money again and in danger of losing her house.
She used to berate me when I would say, "Follow your passion, but pack a lunch." because, "That's not following your passion!" But being homeless and flat broke at 54 years old isn't very passionate either.
posted by ITravelMontana at 1:29 PM on May 31, 2016 [3 favorites]
A year later, after the new boyfriend left, she quit her new job because she wanted to be her own boss again. But she didn't have any plan of what to do. Last I heard she was out of money again and in danger of losing her house.
She used to berate me when I would say, "Follow your passion, but pack a lunch." because, "That's not following your passion!" But being homeless and flat broke at 54 years old isn't very passionate either.
posted by ITravelMontana at 1:29 PM on May 31, 2016 [3 favorites]
When I was 20, I thought the only way I could have a life worth living was to make my own way and change the world. Now that I'm 40, finding a way to live in the world and be happy seems like achievement enough.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 10:42 PM on May 31, 2016 [7 favorites]
posted by DirtyOldTown at 10:42 PM on May 31, 2016 [7 favorites]
« Older Bisexual Buccaneers from Both-Ways Bay | Yo mama's so vast, she contains multitudes Newer »
This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments
It seems like it's no longer cool to willingly retire before 40. You have to be a serial entrepreneur even when you're fed up with the rat race.
posted by mccarty.tim at 7:52 AM on May 30, 2016 [57 favorites]