"...a fur-covered furnace"
June 14, 2016 1:31 PM Subscribe
I was happy to learn "least weasels" are a thing. Sadly no "most weasels" though.
posted by anti social order at 2:10 PM on June 14, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by anti social order at 2:10 PM on June 14, 2016 [3 favorites]
Mustelids 4 life. Best animals.
posted by threetwentytwo at 2:26 PM on June 14, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by threetwentytwo at 2:26 PM on June 14, 2016 [5 favorites]
"Thumb, I KEEL you!"
And I can't even describe how adorable this is.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 2:28 PM on June 14, 2016 [10 favorites]
And I can't even describe how adorable this is.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 2:28 PM on June 14, 2016 [10 favorites]
Honey Badger is the Most Weasel
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 2:28 PM on June 14, 2016 [8 favorites]
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 2:28 PM on June 14, 2016 [8 favorites]
The description of a porcupine kill just freaked me out. "After a few face bites, the porcupine weakens." Yeah, me too, buddy, me too.
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln at 2:34 PM on June 14, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln at 2:34 PM on June 14, 2016 [4 favorites]
Just more pro-weasel bias from the MSM. (Actually this is really great science writing.)
posted by not_the_water at 3:03 PM on June 14, 2016
posted by not_the_water at 3:03 PM on June 14, 2016
After a few face bites, the porcupine weakens.
Weasel gnawed on its beak!
posted by Greg_Ace at 3:04 PM on June 14, 2016 [2 favorites]
Weasel gnawed on its beak!
posted by Greg_Ace at 3:04 PM on June 14, 2016 [2 favorites]
Yay! Fuzzy snakes with legs!
One of my favorite things about them has long been stoat dancing!
Which search just now also led me to the phrase "weasel war dance".
posted by Mister Moofoo at 3:15 PM on June 14, 2016
One of my favorite things about them has long been stoat dancing!
Which search just now also led me to the phrase "weasel war dance".
posted by Mister Moofoo at 3:15 PM on June 14, 2016
A discussion of least weasels led to one of my favorite metafilter comments ever. "tiny furry angels bearing swords of fire descended upon the fat mousie sinners". Hee.
posted by tavella at 3:37 PM on June 14, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by tavella at 3:37 PM on June 14, 2016 [5 favorites]
Ze Frank needs to do a True Facts of the Weasel.
posted by Splunge at 3:50 PM on June 14, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by Splunge at 3:50 PM on June 14, 2016 [1 favorite]
Ze Frank needs to do a True Facts of the Weasel.Would you settle for Zea Otter?
posted by Nerd of the North at 3:58 PM on June 14, 2016
Weasels also appreciate the value of co-opted fur. In winter, voles and mice build little dome-shaped nests under the snow. When a weasel finds one of these nests, it’s a genuine jackpot: lunch and lodging combined. Better still with a few tweaks: After eating the residents, the weasel lines its new dwelling in rodent fur to improve insulation.
“If you pop open one of these nests in springtime, you discover a macabre scene,” Dr. Zielinski said. “What was once occupied by a vole is now covered with vole-hair wallpaper.”
So adorable!
posted by Pope Guilty at 4:10 PM on June 14, 2016 [17 favorites]
“If you pop open one of these nests in springtime, you discover a macabre scene,” Dr. Zielinski said. “What was once occupied by a vole is now covered with vole-hair wallpaper.”
So adorable!
posted by Pope Guilty at 4:10 PM on June 14, 2016 [17 favorites]
They're like fuzzy little Fallout raiders.
posted by Pope Guilty at 4:19 PM on June 14, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by Pope Guilty at 4:19 PM on June 14, 2016 [4 favorites]
I was happy to learn "least weasels" are a thing
That's so mean! They're trying their best!
posted by Itaxpica at 4:22 PM on June 14, 2016 [3 favorites]
That's so mean! They're trying their best!
posted by Itaxpica at 4:22 PM on June 14, 2016 [3 favorites]
Also, the Wilipedia page for least weasel is home to my new favorite bit of oddly specific folk mythology:
"In some districts of Macedon, women who suffered from headaches after having washed their heads in water drawn overnight would assume that a weasel had previously used the water as a mirror, but they would refrain from mentioning the animal's name for fear that it would destroy their clothes."
posted by Itaxpica at 4:25 PM on June 14, 2016 [20 favorites]
"In some districts of Macedon, women who suffered from headaches after having washed their heads in water drawn overnight would assume that a weasel had previously used the water as a mirror, but they would refrain from mentioning the animal's name for fear that it would destroy their clothes."
posted by Itaxpica at 4:25 PM on June 14, 2016 [20 favorites]
Charming subject, charming article.
“They’re living life on the edge,” Dr. Powell said.
Weasels: the most adorable, yet most metal, of the longcats
posted by the thought-fox at 4:28 PM on June 14, 2016 [2 favorites]
“They’re living life on the edge,” Dr. Powell said.
Weasels: the most adorable, yet most metal, of the longcats
posted by the thought-fox at 4:28 PM on June 14, 2016 [2 favorites]
The weasel - or perhaps a wolverine - is a much better choice as the national mascot than the carrion eating distant cousin of the buzzard we currently have. (Although, my second choice would be Ben Franklin's suggestion, the turkey.)
posted by sudogeek at 4:29 PM on June 14, 2016
posted by sudogeek at 4:29 PM on June 14, 2016
Frank Zappa said it best: "Weasles Ripped My Flesh"
posted by oneswellfoop at 4:31 PM on June 14, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by oneswellfoop at 4:31 PM on June 14, 2016 [2 favorites]
the Fisher Cat
I'll take beatnik grail legends for 800, Alex
posted by prize bull octorok at 4:38 PM on June 14, 2016 [5 favorites]
I'll take beatnik grail legends for 800, Alex
posted by prize bull octorok at 4:38 PM on June 14, 2016 [5 favorites]
Love that the Paris-based weasel research laboratory names all their stinky weasels after smelly french cheeses. Epoisse is a hell of a weasel name.
posted by deludingmyself at 4:50 PM on June 14, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by deludingmyself at 4:50 PM on June 14, 2016 [1 favorite]
least weasel is BEST WEASEL
please oh please can we domesticate them for snuggly tiny house predators
posted by nicebookrack at 5:05 PM on June 14, 2016 [3 favorites]
please oh please can we domesticate them for snuggly tiny house predators
posted by nicebookrack at 5:05 PM on June 14, 2016 [3 favorites]
MURDER NOODLES
posted by poffin boffin at 5:06 PM on June 14, 2016 [26 favorites]
posted by poffin boffin at 5:06 PM on June 14, 2016 [26 favorites]
i tried and failed to find any photos of weasels or ferrets in hot dog buns which frankly is pretty unacceptable
posted by burgerrr at 5:14 PM on June 14, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by burgerrr at 5:14 PM on June 14, 2016 [1 favorite]
Is this where I mention the European Beech Marten, which is known to prey on cars?
posted by Huffy Puffy at 5:34 PM on June 14, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by Huffy Puffy at 5:34 PM on June 14, 2016 [1 favorite]
At night, the ice weasels come.
posted by delfin at 6:29 PM on June 14, 2016 [9 favorites]
posted by delfin at 6:29 PM on June 14, 2016 [9 favorites]
please oh please can we domesticate them for snuggly tiny house predators
We have ferrets already. And as any ferret owner will tell you, they are very snuggly. Until they bite something that you'd rather not have bitten. Like a toe -- I've had my toe bit by a ferret, and it was painful. Any protuberance or appendage under the covers is fair game. (I love ferrets, and am violently allergic to them.)
posted by sneebler at 7:29 PM on June 14, 2016 [3 favorites]
We have ferrets already. And as any ferret owner will tell you, they are very snuggly. Until they bite something that you'd rather not have bitten. Like a toe -- I've had my toe bit by a ferret, and it was painful. Any protuberance or appendage under the covers is fair game. (I love ferrets, and am violently allergic to them.)
posted by sneebler at 7:29 PM on June 14, 2016 [3 favorites]
At night, the ice weasels come.
Now I just want the first part of the quote. What is love, delfin?
posted by aspersioncast at 8:03 PM on June 14, 2016
Now I just want the first part of the quote. What is love, delfin?
posted by aspersioncast at 8:03 PM on June 14, 2016
We have pine martens where I live and they literally do not give a single fuck. They will walk right up to you and practically demand your sandwich. They try to get in the garbage and when you walk up they seem unfazed until the last moment, nonchalantly looking at you as if to say, "Yeah, you lumbering meat sack, I can totally get away from you whenever I am ready. So, I'm just going to continue ripping the this stuff apart, feel free to watch."
We have sea otters and ermine around here too.
I love them.
posted by Belle O'Cosity at 8:30 PM on June 14, 2016 [5 favorites]
We have sea otters and ermine around here too.
I love them.
posted by Belle O'Cosity at 8:30 PM on June 14, 2016 [5 favorites]
They omitted the essential information about how to tell a stoat from a weasel, which that while one is weasily identified, the other is stoatally different.
posted by i_am_joe's_spleen at 8:34 PM on June 14, 2016 [21 favorites]
posted by i_am_joe's_spleen at 8:34 PM on June 14, 2016 [21 favorites]
To call someone a weasel means the person is shifty, untrustworthy.
Obligatory Simpsons.
Awesome article. Adult animals that play are the best animals.
posted by mark k at 8:35 PM on June 14, 2016
Obligatory Simpsons.
Awesome article. Adult animals that play are the best animals.
posted by mark k at 8:35 PM on June 14, 2016
I inspected a road kill fisher for ectoparasites as part of a Lyme disease study in the 80s & it was awesome. The Department of Environmental Management would bring us carcasses which would go in the freezer for a while so they didn't smell too bad when looking (slowly and carefully, under a dissecting scope) for fleas, lice, ticks and mites, but raccoons were usually pretty awful.
The fisher's scent must have driven off parasites. I think I found one mite. The fur was so luxurious. The DEM guys were excited about the fisher too- they rarely saw them, even as road kill, because they're so good at avoiding humans.
Some of the results [PDF, hopelessly outdated]
posted by morganw at 8:36 PM on June 14, 2016
The fisher's scent must have driven off parasites. I think I found one mite. The fur was so luxurious. The DEM guys were excited about the fisher too- they rarely saw them, even as road kill, because they're so good at avoiding humans.
Some of the results [PDF, hopelessly outdated]
posted by morganw at 8:36 PM on June 14, 2016
I once caught a weasel (very briefly) in my hat as it ran along a road. Its body was amazingly solid, very tough with no softness. I was very excited to hold such a wonderful creature but fearful of its bite I chickened out fast and let it go.
posted by anadem at 9:08 PM on June 14, 2016
posted by anadem at 9:08 PM on June 14, 2016
Now I just want the first part of the quote. What is love, delfin?
Baby, don't hurt me. Don't hurt me. No more.
posted by delfin at 5:09 AM on June 15, 2016 [3 favorites]
Baby, don't hurt me. Don't hurt me. No more.
posted by delfin at 5:09 AM on June 15, 2016 [3 favorites]
I love members of the weasel family. So playful and fun, even the ones that are total killing machines.
I lived with ferrets for about twenty solid years. Loved them; miss them every day. They're very social animals , so you really need to have several at a time, and they always want to hang out, play with you, follow you around, etc. Unfortunately they really only live around 5-8 years on average, and it just got too heartbreaking for me to continue having ferrets.
posted by slkinsey at 5:34 AM on June 15, 2016 [3 favorites]
I lived with ferrets for about twenty solid years. Loved them; miss them every day. They're very social animals , so you really need to have several at a time, and they always want to hang out, play with you, follow you around, etc. Unfortunately they really only live around 5-8 years on average, and it just got too heartbreaking for me to continue having ferrets.
posted by slkinsey at 5:34 AM on June 15, 2016 [3 favorites]
What kind of hat was this!
This kind, purpose-built for weaselin'.
posted by FatherDagon at 10:55 AM on June 15, 2016 [1 favorite]
This kind, purpose-built for weaselin'.
posted by FatherDagon at 10:55 AM on June 15, 2016 [1 favorite]
Now I just want the first part of the quote. What is love, delfin?
IIRC, love is a snowmobile bounding across the arctic tundra, when suddenly it flips, pinning you underneath.
posted by kenko at 11:40 AM on June 15, 2016
IIRC, love is a snowmobile bounding across the arctic tundra, when suddenly it flips, pinning you underneath.
posted by kenko at 11:40 AM on June 15, 2016
« Older Eraced | A cover-to-cover parody of the New Yorker Newer »
This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments
posted by charred husk at 2:08 PM on June 14, 2016 [1 favorite]