Cute-off of the day

May 1, 2017 6:21 AM

Which is more squeeful, a puppy eating a banana or ten kittens being corralled for a family photo?

The correct answer of course is "puppy eating a banana." Here are more puppies eating fruit.

posted by Johnny Wallflower (42 comments total)

I'm sorry, but:

1. not a puppy, thus your submission is invalid.
2. kittens.
posted by INFJ at 6:28 AM on May 1, 2017 [7 favorites]

I think my favorite part of the banana video was after the owner took it away, and the dog looked right into the camera, licking its nose in a relaxed, sort of sated way.
posted by Orlop at 6:28 AM on May 1, 2017 [4 favorites]

ten kittens being corralled for a family photo?

It's like herding cats.
posted by leotrotsky at 6:33 AM on May 1, 2017 [2 favorites]

Notice that bananas were perfectly designed by God, for dogs to hold while eating
posted by thelonius at 6:34 AM on May 1, 2017 [17 favorites]

I am not sure I have ever giggled more helplessly than when I watched this kitten video.
posted by leesh at 6:35 AM on May 1, 2017 [6 favorites]

Notice that bananas were perfectly designed by God, for dogs to hold while eating

Idiot. Don't you know that in nature, dogs are full of seeds?
posted by leotrotsky at 6:36 AM on May 1, 2017 [8 favorites]

not a puppy, thus your submission is invalid.

They're all puppies, Bront.
posted by lunasol at 6:38 AM on May 1, 2017 [15 favorites]

I give up. I'll have to watch both videos on an endless loop for several hours before I can even begin to decide which elicits more squees.

Which is remarkable because I began this experiment assuming that herding a litter of 10 kittens would automatically be the winner. But that is indeed a good dog, Bart.
posted by janey47 at 6:42 AM on May 1, 2017 [2 favorites]

Which is more squeeful, a puppy pinwheel or a double puppy pinwheel?

(more pinwheels)
posted by effbot at 6:50 AM on May 1, 2017 [9 favorites]

Towards the end of the kitten video there's a white floofball trying to walk but ends up spinning it's little floof legs without getting anywhere on the slippery floor. Advantage kittens.
posted by Room 641-A at 7:06 AM on May 1, 2017 [14 favorites]

The kitten vid offers more sustained cuteness and only requires "Yakkity Sax" to hit the big time.
posted by TigerB at 7:37 AM on May 1, 2017 [5 favorites]

Tough call. Since this is actually not an Ask I don't feel obligated to give my answer puppy.
posted by achrise at 7:44 AM on May 1, 2017 [4 favorites]

Okay, puppy, but only if you watch with the sound on so that you get the lovely little gobbling sounds.
posted by Cocodrillo at 7:53 AM on May 1, 2017

Dog, at end of video: "I regret nothing."
posted by notsnot at 8:05 AM on May 1, 2017 [2 favorites]

That kitten video looks like an animation of a broken sorting algorithm
posted by kurumi at 8:16 AM on May 1, 2017 [25 favorites]

The kitten video seemed like a needlessly complex magic trick -- "keep your eye on the kitten..."

Either that or a demonstration of a law of kitten physics that kittens tend to move toward areas of lower kitten concentration (except during mealtimes). Also that kittens, once in motion, tend to remain in motion.
posted by GenjiandProust at 8:18 AM on May 1, 2017 [9 favorites]

mm, I'm a fan of the kitten who keeps turning around and heading away from the camera. Some invisible force is compelling said kitten towards the back of the room, and getting placed facing forwards only lasts a short time.

Also the banana is a little licky for me.
posted by nat at 8:34 AM on May 1, 2017

I hate bananas and watching that dog (not a puppy!) eating that banana is making me phantom-smell bananas so I'm going for kittens.
posted by soren_lorensen at 8:38 AM on May 1, 2017 [2 favorites]

all dog are pupper
posted by idiopath at 8:40 AM on May 1, 2017 [8 favorites]

That dog is eating the banana FROM THE WRONG END!
posted by FelliniBlank at 8:43 AM on May 1, 2017

What I like best of the kitten video is that you can watch it multiple times and see something new each time.

Pupper licking the banana only has one watch worth of entertainment.
posted by INFJ at 8:47 AM on May 1, 2017 [4 favorites]

Everyone needs to look at this vid! It's a little guy eating a banana! He's holding it in his little dog hands!

"maxwelton, we'd like you to sign this confession for every crime ever." "What? I'm not an idiot." (Monitor behind officer begins playing banana video, thugs repeat request.) "Sure, whatever, did you guys see that little guy? OMG!"
posted by maxwelton at 8:51 AM on May 1, 2017 [3 favorites]

I'm starting a term as department chair next week, god help me, and it's going to be just like that kitten video, except with the kittens also biting and scratching me and each other.
posted by FelliniBlank at 8:53 AM on May 1, 2017 [4 favorites]

When I first saw the kitten thing as a gif on tumblr I kept trying to count the kittens and failing. Eventually I had to count them by colour and add them together.
posted by HypotheticalWoman at 8:59 AM on May 1, 2017 [2 favorites]

At :35, he stacks two of the kittens, and the white one on the bottom looks so adorably put out but isn't doing anything about it.
posted by gladly at 9:31 AM on May 1, 2017 [6 favorites]

Oh, god, can we at least have kitten stacking be a thing in this awful timeline?
posted by Room 641-A at 9:37 AM on May 1, 2017 [6 favorites]

Yes.
posted by maryr at 10:08 AM on May 1, 2017 [2 favorites]

Also that kittens, once in motion, tend to remain in motion

Also, cats gonna do what cats gonna do. Starting in kittenhood.
posted by mudpuppie at 10:20 AM on May 1, 2017 [1 favorite]

That dog is eating the banana FROM THE WRONG END!

Please clarify whether you mean the wrong end of the banana or the wrong end of the dog.
posted by GenjiandProust at 10:49 AM on May 1, 2017 [3 favorites]

You guys! There are more videos of the 10 kittens! Two! Three! Four! Five!!1!

Such adorable fuzzy tiny drunks! The grey ones are like the one guy who really wants to go to Denny's, and the white ones are the quietly confused drunks in the corner!
posted by Homeboy Trouble at 11:30 AM on May 1, 2017 [14 favorites]

Pupper licking the banana only has one watch worth of entertainment.
posted by INFJ

TIL that INFJ is a sockpuppet for hippybear. Nice try, dude.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 11:47 AM on May 1, 2017 [1 favorite]

the little banana eater is so slow and polite with his banana. My little dog would've eaten the entire banana and then started eating the peel in approximately 5 seconds.
posted by ilovewinter at 11:53 AM on May 1, 2017 [1 favorite]

TigerB, I tested out your suggestion and re-watched the kitten video with Yakkity Sax playing in another tab, and it resulted in an approximate 40% increase in laughs and 75% increase in cuteness. A++ suggestion.
posted by carlypennylane at 12:40 PM on May 1, 2017 [4 favorites]

You guys! There are more videos of the 10 kittens!

On a serious note, I hope everyone watching will realize that Ten-Cat Monte is a grift. A con game. You'll never pick the right cat, so save your money.
posted by Room 641-A at 1:03 PM on May 1, 2017 [11 favorites]

When I was a child I used to have a recurring nightmare. It's hard to explain what happened in the nightmare, only that it gave me a great deal of anxiety.

That kitten video reminds me of that nightmare.
posted by urbanwhaleshark at 1:11 PM on May 1, 2017 [3 favorites]

Have you ever seen me and hippybear in the same room together, hmmmmmmmm?

(omg, I am dead after the additional kitten videos, Homeboy Trouble)
posted by INFJ at 1:20 PM on May 1, 2017

Cattos win everything forever. They're still at the tiny little cone-tail stage! Sorry, banana doggo. You were set up against unfair competition. You would have beaten hustle doggo.
posted by sldownard at 1:27 PM on May 1, 2017 [2 favorites]

The kitten video seemed like a needlessly complex magic trick -- "keep your eye on the kitten..."

I bet you never even noticed the gorilla passing through that video.
posted by happyroach at 1:34 PM on May 1, 2017 [5 favorites]

Well, the kitten video certainly keeps my attention longer because of the divergent points of action. But got damn if my dog would have eaten that banana in a second. So, puppy wins again.
posted by perrouno at 1:45 PM on May 1, 2017

At :35, he stacks two of the kittens , and the white one on the bottom looks so adorably put out but isn't doing anything about it.

I kept thinking that the kitten stacking seemed to be working as a strategy for making the kittens stay put and wondering why it wasn't being used more frequently.
posted by lazuli at 4:28 PM on May 1, 2017 [2 favorites]

'Good Lord - I've heard about this - cat juggling! Stop! Stop! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Good. Father, could there be a god that would let this happen?'
posted by punilux at 4:38 PM on May 1, 2017 [1 favorite]

What really impresses me about the kitten video is the astonishing lack of cussing from the human.
posted by FelliniBlank at 5:02 PM on May 1, 2017 [2 favorites]