How about that much anticipated sports match last night?

October 2, 2017 5:22 AM

A potentially humorous take on being an introvert from non-introverts.
posted by Brandon Blatcher (48 comments total)

Could we change the link just to the direct video url? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MdG4f5Y3ugk&feature=youtu.be

I really enjoyed this.
posted by jeather at 5:27 AM on October 2, 2017 [1 favorite]

Mod note: Yeah, fixed. BB, let me/us know if you want a "via."
posted by taz (staff) at 5:31 AM on October 2, 2017

Yes, laughed out loud, forwarded to people. I think the introvert-extrovert division is really more of a continuum, though: I used to be a full-on introvert, but nowadays can spend hours with people I like without getting tired.
posted by tickingclock at 5:44 AM on October 2, 2017

I found this offensive. Other introverts may wish to steer clear.
posted by ragtag at 6:14 AM on October 2, 2017 [10 favorites]

Just because I'm an introvert doesn't make me mentally ill. I stopped watching after that "joke". Flagged.
posted by BigVACub at 6:18 AM on October 2, 2017 [8 favorites]

Just because I'm an introvert doesn't make me mentally ill. I stopped watching after that "joke". Flagged.

I heard it like that at first but the joke's actually the other way round - it says introverts aren't mentally ill but extroverts are. It's still a shit, offensive joke however.
posted by EndsOfInvention at 6:22 AM on October 2, 2017 [2 favorites]

It's just exaggeration of salient traits to the absurd. I'm a massive introvert and I was pissing myself laughing at this.
posted by Talez at 6:24 AM on October 2, 2017 [6 favorites]

At first I was an introvert, then I was an extrovert, then I was a retrovert and now I'm an ambivert but everyone thinks that means I'm a pervert.
posted by octobersurprise at 6:26 AM on October 2, 2017 [13 favorites]

Guess that beets being a haricot vert.
posted by octobersurprise at 6:32 AM on October 2, 2017 [19 favorites]

I found this delightfully unoffensive, and I'm also an introvert. Thought it was hilarious.
posted by heyho at 6:33 AM on October 2, 2017 [6 favorites]

yeah, suspected it'll be hit or miss for folks, but it cracked my introverted ass up this morning, so figured it was worth sharing.

"A window so they can escape" lol
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 6:36 AM on October 2, 2017 [3 favorites]

No offense taken here, and I can match introversions with the best of them. (Though not in public or anything, that'd be a nightmare.)
posted by gusottertrout at 7:28 AM on October 2, 2017 [3 favorites]

Another introvert who thought this was hilarious.

I figured the butt of the joke was the extroverts who describe introverts. Can be compared and contrasted with this book on cat-human interactions I just finished, or Mallory Ortberg's Sorry I Murdered Everyone I'm an Introvert
posted by mark k at 7:34 AM on October 2, 2017 [6 favorites]

I know an introvert couple who live in different countries, and I will eat my (not first addition, but century+ old) copy of Bleak House if they haven't ended up individually reading during a video call date.
posted by wires at 7:35 AM on October 2, 2017 [2 favorites]

I know an introvert couple who live in different countries, and I will eat my (not first addition, but century+ old) copy of Bleak House if they haven't ended up individually reading during a video call date.

My wife and I read whenever we have dinner together; Her reading fiction and myself reading non-fiction. Opposites really do attract!
posted by Talez at 7:53 AM on October 2, 2017 [21 favorites]

I know an introvert couple who live in different countries, and I will eat my (not first addition, but century+ old) copy of Bleak House if they haven't ended up individually reading during a video call date.

This sounds perfectly delightful to me.

I regularly invite friends to come over and play with my dog and say nothing.
posted by mochapickle at 8:10 AM on October 2, 2017 [5 favorites]

Ah, yes, the two genders: introvert and extrovert.
posted by tobascodagama at 8:44 AM on October 2, 2017 [3 favorites]

I heard it like that at first but the joke's actually the other way round - it says introverts aren't mentally ill but extroverts are.

The audio narration says "aren't", the captions say "are". Regardless of who its directed at, meh on that joke.
posted by Kabanos at 8:47 AM on October 2, 2017 [2 favorites]

"Come over and play with my cats and talk very little" is an ideal hangout or date scenario. Also, I greatly appreciated that ten-point conversational catastrophe scale, and may save a screenshot for future usage.
posted by Stacey at 8:49 AM on October 2, 2017 [3 favorites]

I found it amusing for a while, then it got old so I noped out, but I'm an ambivert so that's probably why. And that's my reason because.
posted by MovableBookLady at 8:49 AM on October 2, 2017 [3 favorites]

This hit pretty close to home, then a little too close to home, and then it just hit me right at home.
posted by rebent at 8:53 AM on October 2, 2017 [2 favorites]

Introversion really did need a public awareness campaign lo these many years ago, but it accomplished those goals and then overshot them so far that it got seriously obnoxious, with all the smug diatribes and self-absorbed comics picturing women wearing blankets over their heads, all making out as though introversion is some overarching black and white group identity rather than a single personality trait.

It doesn't help that one of the seminal 'introversion awareness' articles is titled, "Caring for your Introvert." The article itself is pretty good, but the title is just a little too precious, and rightly deserves the mockery.
posted by ernielundquist at 9:32 AM on October 2, 2017 [10 favorites]

"Bye"
posted by twidget at 9:45 AM on October 2, 2017

I have totally had conversations along "What?" "Fuck! Well I'd better runaroo..." "What?" lines. I'm much less of an introvert in general these days, but this was a funny reminder that the part of me that is exhausted after a night spent with people I like and that will pretend to be doing stuff to avoid the neighbour-in-the-hallway type scenario is still inside, trying not to make eye contact. I take good care of her.
posted by billiebee at 9:46 AM on October 2, 2017 [2 favorites]

This had some funny and clever bits. But as an introvert, I'm really tired of people conflating introversion with lacking social skills, even if it's done in ironically.
posted by epimorph at 10:58 AM on October 2, 2017 [4 favorites]

Just because I'm an introvert doesn't make me mentally ill. I stopped watching after that "joke". Flagged.

we're not seriously defining introversion as an identity now, are we?
posted by philip-random at 11:20 AM on October 2, 2017 [3 favorites]

Seems to me that the discussion around introverts is crippled by confusing us with shy or socially awkward adolescents. I was both for a long while, which I don't think is rare, but then I grew up and had some experiences and asked some people out and some even agreed to go out with me and now I'm only occasionally socially awkward, like most people probably.

I'm also a standup comedian so people literally refuse to believe I was ever an introvert, because I'm confident and fairly good at conversation and not afraid to talk to a crowd of drunk people. But that's all about being shy and socially inept, not introverted.

I remain a writer who is happy staying in his house or a library all day, enjoys interstate drives by myself and has self-defined rather than socially driven standards for judging myself (and others, frankly). I think the negative and condescending attitudes toward introverts come from defining us as social losers though.
posted by msalt at 11:35 AM on October 2, 2017 [9 favorites]

One major failing of humanity is our need to sort everyone into Team Red or Team Blue.
posted by grumpybear69 at 11:37 AM on October 2, 2017 [2 favorites]

Yah, it pretty much reveals the position of the creators when the extrovert calls and the Caller ID says, "Normal person." Meh.
posted by Atreides at 11:43 AM on October 2, 2017 [1 favorite]

One major failing of humanity is our need to sort everyone into Team Red or Team Blue.

Everyone always forgets about Team Instinct.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 11:54 AM on October 2, 2017 [5 favorites]

Did you see that ludicrous display last night? What was Wenger thinking sending Walcott on that early? The thing about Arsenal is, they always try to walk it in!
posted by Flexagon at 2:08 PM on October 2, 2017 [10 favorites]

One major failing of humanity is our need to sort everyone into Team Red or Team Blue.

So you're saying there are people who want to sort people into two groups, and people who don't?

(Introvert, I lol'd.)
posted by obiwanwasabi at 3:25 PM on October 2, 2017 [2 favorites]

The most surprising thing about this is that Brits pronounce "router" as "rooter." No wonder we declared independence.
posted by AFABulous at 3:26 PM on October 2, 2017 [3 favorites]

My girlfriend and I watched this together and thought it was hilarious. We're both pretty awkward, but it kind of described me perfectly (like, I have actually gone back inside to do "important stuff" just to avoid seeing a neighbor in the hallway). I don't think it would have been nearly as funny if we hadn't been able to relate so well.

I prefer this take on introversion, where I can laugh about all the times I've run away from conversations. It's funny! It doesn't need to be this serious Condition that must be discussed in Serious Terms at all times. This video was very obviously "laughing with," not "laughing at."
posted by shapes that haunt the dusk at 6:36 PM on October 2, 2017 [3 favorites]

I'm actually an introvert, by which I mean I recharge through being alone and quiet, but I'm not socially awkward and I don't dislike people. I can be, and am, outspoken and friendly, with a big inclusive laugh. It's just that I have to have down time daily in a quiet space. So tbh, this was mildly amusing for maybe about 60 seconds and then it just seemed repetitive and misinformed. And kind of sad.
posted by janey47 at 8:35 PM on October 2, 2017 [5 favorites]

It's still the energy thing for me. Interacting with people leads to exhaustion. Alone time recharges my mind and body. The extroverts I know don't seem to to have this issue and alone time is something they really don't seem to need.
posted by longdaysjourney at 9:36 PM on October 2, 2017 [2 favorites]

I'm actually an introvert...it just seemed repetitive and misinformed

Multiple people commenting here that the video rang true for them. Are they not 'actual' introverts?
posted by obiwanwasabi at 9:52 PM on October 2, 2017 [1 favorite]

There are people who find socializing exhausting, but who can't relate to the extreme social awkwardness that is often associated with the word "introvert." The way the word is used now, there's no way of describing yourself as the former without people assuming the latter. As funny as I thought this video was, I can see how it might be frustrating that it helps to reinforce that conflation of introversion and awkwardness.
posted by shapes that haunt the dusk at 10:34 PM on October 2, 2017 [2 favorites]

i think , as ernielundquist alluded to , the context of the multitude of these "what it's like to be an introvert," "23 things only introverts will understand" etc. articles , which are often a mix of patting-self-on-back and cloying quirkiness while relying on the "extrovert" foil as the normal/normie who just doesn't understand (definitely with some sort of class thing going on too - the extrovert rabbles , is part of The Rabble ; i introvert just want to Read and Think) is important ?. so it seems more like satire of that sort of self-identification as introvert because they are better in some way ( i live w someone who i would say is very extroverted but who identifies as an introvert precisely because i think of that image of the introvert as yknow bookish quirky etc) , and the attribution of some sort of value or superiority to what is essentially a contingent personal disposition over which one has arguably very little control , than making fun of introversion itself ... ?
posted by LeviQayin at 3:06 AM on October 3, 2017 [1 favorite]

Multiple people commenting here that the video rang true for them. Are they not 'actual' introverts?

Introversion is not a personality type. It's not social anxiety or shyness, and it doesn't require you sit around with a blanket on your head reading books and drinking tea, which is a stereotype that's emerged. That's a constellation of traits that some relate to, obviously, but it's not introversion.

It's entirely possible that introverted people have a greater incidence of unmanaged social anxiety because they have less motivation to overcome it than someone who has a stronger desire to socialize, but it's not otherwise related.

People project, and extroverted people have more opportunities to project, so normal solitary behaviors got pathologized by people who only want to be alone when they're depressed. So the public awareness campaign about introversion was a good thing, as you could forward a couple of articles to your well meaning but intrusive friends to show them, "See? I'm fine, so you don't have to cure me."

Intro- vs. extroversion is a single, fairly simple spectrum. Nobody is all one or the other, and no matter where you sit on that spectrum, it's not an all inclusive personality type. It's just that fifteen years ago or so, a lot of people weren't aware that that spectrum even existed, so they needed to have it explained.

It was explained. There. Job done. That message reached as many people as it's ever likely to reach, so that should have been the end of it.

But a lot of people started identifying too heavily as introverts like it was a whole personality type, and piling on all this other stuff, a lot of it irrelevant, a lot of it really judgmental and self-congratulatory. Introversion is a fairly minor trait, like having a sweet tooth or preferring a warm climate. It has a limited influence on your life. It doesn't dictate your media preferences, your political stances, your religious views, your intelligence or skills or interests, it doesn't make you awkward or anxious or fearful. The video creators didn't just make up all those specious claims, though. Self-identified introverts did in like a million cutesy little comics and smug memes, and that was long overdue for some mockery.
posted by ernielundquist at 11:00 AM on October 3, 2017 [3 favorites]

Multiple people commenting here that the video rang true for them. Are they not 'actual' introverts?

I don't the author's intent was to de-legitimize the other commentators, but just to assert their own personal perspective.

I think to expound on my own issue, which affects how I perceived the video, was that I do get worn down being around a lot of people, especially those I don't know. Throw in a hearing loss problem, where I have the added stress of making sure I'm close enough to understand what people are saying so I don't have to feel embarrassed about asking someone to repeat what they said; and well, that leads me to leaving social events early or dodging them entirely and it's felt like most of my life everyone kind of reflects on this behavior as negative. The video, as good natured as I think the creators intended, still kind of reflected this perspective, under my interpretation - that there was something wrong with me, outside of the norm. I just couldn't laugh enough at myself to overcome my own irritation at how I've been perceived in the past.
posted by Atreides at 2:03 PM on October 3, 2017 [1 favorite]

Introversion is a fairly minor trait, like having a sweet tooth or preferring a warm climate. It has a limited influence on your life.

This is has not be my experience at all.

Understanding that I need to factor in downtime to manage dealing with people has been an absolutely crucial and a complete game changer for me personally.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 3:36 PM on October 3, 2017 [5 favorites]

Introversion is a fairly minor trait, like having a sweet tooth or preferring a warm climate. It has a limited influence on your life.

This is has not be my experience at all.

yeah, I took issue that particular line, but otherwise found myself nodding at ernielundquist's statement.

In my immediate family alone, I have one brother who absolutely defines me as an extrovert, another who thinks me so introverted that he's expressed concern. I guess, deep down inside I'm just one more living-breathing quantum mechanical analogy -- sometimes I'm a wave, sometimes I'm a particle.
posted by philip-random at 7:03 PM on October 3, 2017

Flight is both wave and particle.
posted by octobersurprise at 7:14 PM on October 3, 2017

The most surprising thing about this is that Brits pronounce "router" as "rooter." No wonder we declared independence.

For added hilarity, try that in Aus/NZ
posted by HiroProtagonist at 7:40 PM on October 3, 2017

I see what you mean by it not always being a minor thing in practice, but in my experience, the only reason it's ever a big deal is because of other people. But on its own, I don't see it as all that different from some other minor trait or preference that your friends and family understands and accommodates. It just means you need extra solitary time. The same way you understand and accommodate things like a friend who sleeps odd hours, who is lactose intolerant or can't handle spicy foods, who can't stand cold, is hard of hearing, or is nervous around dogs. Those are all fairly minor but important things, too, and they're pretty easy to accommodate as long as people know about them and aren't jerks about it.

So I'll rephrase. It should be a minor trait. It should be as minor to say that you're going to stay in tonight because you're tapped out as it is to say that you're not going to have any queso because it would make you fart all night.
posted by ernielundquist at 9:01 AM on October 4, 2017

If you're alone, you can fart all night.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 11:17 AM on October 4, 2017

throw in a hearing loss problem, where I have the added stress of making sure I'm close enough to understand what people are saying so I don't have to feel embarrassed about asking someone to repeat what they said;

I am hard of hearing and I wonder how much of my introversion is actually exhaustion from the concentration required to have conversations.
posted by AFABulous at 12:33 PM on October 4, 2017 [1 favorite]