I left my knickers at a house party we crashed

January 13, 2019 12:30 PM

Every Saturday, The Guardian runs a blind date column, and every Saturday, the daters answer the questions about their date pretty coyly. Until this week's, when Joanne & Morgan hit it off pretty successfully. Joanne replied to “Did you kiss?” with “We did. A lot”, and Morgan replied with “Sure did”. It caused enough of a sensation that it merited a follow up article – they'll be in a full-time relationship once Joanne finishes her pottery course. And regular Guardian blind date reviewer Justin Myers reviewed it with sheer delight, saying

And this is why, in 2019 – Plenty Nineteen? – with all those struggles ahead of us and no end in sight, we have two women out on a date who have decided, “fuck it, the world is a spinning dumpster and I can either be mere kindling for its fire or I can be accelerant and go out with a bang”. And, reader, by the look, feel, smell, and sound of it, they did indeed bang. 💥 💥 💥

posted by ambrosen (28 comments total)

This was an awesome story. Usually the Guardian blind date columns end with mild disappointment (Q: Would you meet again? A: "Maybe, just as friends" or "I don't think so"). And usually it's apparent either one or both of the people on the blind date are extremely boring or uptight.

This was a full-on, tour de force blind date story, good for the soul.
posted by JamesBay at 12:50 PM on January 13, 2019 [15 favorites]

her fairly ugly but sadly estranged cat.

:D :D :D

this is so great and I am very happy for them!

And now I'm going to read the others in the series, which will not be as wonderful but still entertaining, I hope.
posted by batter_my_heart at 1:19 PM on January 13, 2019

Legends.
posted by clavicle at 1:23 PM on January 13, 2019

Ha, I saw that this morning. It is unquestionably the best Blind Date story ever, and I've been reading that column for years. It's awesome that two people were able to just decide to have fun. I'm the uptight kind though, so I don't think it would ever happen to me.
posted by maggiemaggie at 1:25 PM on January 13, 2019 [5 favorites]

Given how much celebrity these two have gotten, I dearly hope the mystified host who found themselves with a spare pair of underwear can return it to them.
posted by jackbishop at 1:45 PM on January 13, 2019

Well, they were ejected from the party, jackbishop, so it's possible that multiple partygoers were aware that underwear was being lost. I mean, I know they weren't invited to the party, but I'm still assuming that they weren't total strangers.
posted by ambrosen at 1:54 PM on January 13, 2019

That column was a much-needed reminder, for me, that good things are still possible, even in 2019.
posted by davedave at 1:56 PM on January 13, 2019 [9 favorites]

This filled me with complete joy. I read the blind date thing every weekend and they are so often extremely staid and cautious. It's so cool to see people having Actual Fun. My favourite line was the "good table manners" bit. "Who really cares?" EXACTLY MORGAN.
posted by the cat's pyjamas at 2:07 PM on January 13, 2019 [10 favorites]

I love them and want only great things for them -- together or separately.

The Washington Post does one of these and it's almost always a cringe read. So it's nice to see when people have fun.
posted by darksong at 2:20 PM on January 13, 2019 [1 favorite]

I met my wife on a blind date, almost 32 years ago. Sometimes they work out.
posted by COD at 2:23 PM on January 13, 2019 [18 favorites]

"Dr Charlotte Lydia Riley, a lecturer in 20th-century British history at Southampton University, tweeted: “I spent some time reassuring someone the other day that being in your twenties is always terrible and life gets a lot better in your thirties, then read this and remembered no, actually, your twenties are HILARIOUS.”"

This is great general commentary and also a perfect summation of the date in question. I had also kind of forgotten that, although my 20s were not especially great by adult metrics, I had a pretty great time and it was actually pretty funny. I don't think my life has been that funny since, which is fine, but that's worth something.
posted by Lyn Never at 2:27 PM on January 13, 2019 [21 favorites]

I loved this so much.

Would you introduce her to your friends?
Yes, asap.

The whole world is cheering for you!
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 2:44 PM on January 13, 2019 [2 favorites]

Presumably the photos they show at the top of the article are pretend, because one of these people is a Children's Social Worker and you don't really want to be internet-famous for partying with that sort of job. Or perhaps they've changed enough of the names and details that it doesn't matter. e.g. the photos are real, but the names and job titles aren't.

This is a nice story but it seems to have blown up simply because these Guardian Blind Date things are usually really quite unexciting. See here - The Guardian Weekend magazine has been running a blind date column for over a decade, and has led to two marriages and several relationships. Not sure what 'several' means, lets assume 8 successes in total, over 10 years. Thats a 1.5% success rate. Which is pretty unsuprising really.

But I suppose it makes for a quite interesting column with occasional highs. Maybe the rarity of the 1.5% success rate is what's kept it going for 10 years.
posted by memebake at 3:44 PM on January 13, 2019

For them: Thrilled! It *is* possible!

For me: Depressed AF.
posted by Capt. Renault at 3:49 PM on January 13, 2019 [7 favorites]

Can confirm that crashing a house party is super fun and says a lot about the person you do it with. Bonus points if you score free booze and/or use their bathroom
posted by Automocar at 4:06 PM on January 13, 2019 [1 favorite]

Maybe the rarity of the 1.5% success rate is what's kept it going for 10 years.

As a regular reader of the BD page since it started it is nice to see a success story, and this was certainly on the more exciting end of that - enough for me to comment on it to my SO even, but this is to ignore the other pleasures. Looking at the pics and knowing immediately that is going to be a big nope. The occasional utter knob. The cringe when one participant thinks it all went swimmingly and is up for another meeting and the other is so very not. The more subtle pleasure of considering what went into the mark out of ten.
posted by biffa at 4:14 PM on January 13, 2019 [2 favorites]

I had never seen Justin Myers' blind date review site and it is a delight. Thank you for linking it!
posted by mogget at 4:19 PM on January 13, 2019 [6 favorites]

I had never seen Justin Myers' blind date review site and it is a delight.

I love this. Thank you from me too.
posted by grouse at 4:23 PM on January 13, 2019

Strong use of the [more inside] cut, for the record.
posted by mhoye at 5:55 PM on January 13, 2019 [4 favorites]

I have probably been reading the column for a decade but only discovered Justin Meyers’ reviews this week, they will be a fantastic counterpart for future columns!
posted by ellieBOA at 12:35 AM on January 14, 2019

What I love about this date is that the vast acreage of action (narrative and otherwise) that exists between each comment. This is especially the case for their decision that the follow on activity from their first meeting is not going to be "politely saying goodnight" or "going on to a club" or even "going home to her place" or even-even "going to a party one of us was invited to" - but rather "getting sufficiently drunk together that finding a random party and gatecrashing it". Joanne and Morgan took every cautionary rule about how to behave on a blind date, set fire to them, and appear to have had a blast.
posted by rongorongo at 1:30 AM on January 14, 2019 [5 favorites]

Guardian readers still have sex sometimes. Who knew?
posted by Segundus at 1:41 AM on January 14, 2019

I once appeared in the guardian's blind date column! Sadly nothing too dramatic for mine (the appeal is always reading between the lines). The pictures at the top are real but each person is photographed independently on an occasion before the date (in the guardian office studio). They ask you for a mini bio upfront so match you with some thought to compatibility. The post-date questions are returned by email and mildly edited (mostly for length) before publication - they choose the most exciting quote as a headline. We gave a mutual 8/10 rating and had a nice free meal but no spark - I've never dared read the guyliner review of mine however!

The most strange thing was then a woman read it and tracked me down via linkedin (firstname, occupation, city!) and then facebook to ask me out - I met her but it didn't go anywhere. Still, doubly fun story!
posted by JonB at 3:20 AM on January 14, 2019 [20 favorites]

The most strange thing was then a woman read it and tracked me down via linkedin (firstname, occupation, city!) and then facebook to ask me out - I met her but it didn't go anywhere.

I always wondered if people got extra dates via the column like this.

I met my wife via the Guardian, but through their dating site rather than the Blind Date column...
posted by EndsOfInvention at 4:32 AM on January 14, 2019 [1 favorite]

Such a delight!

I’d never heard if this column before. Justin Myer’s column, also new to me, kept me company through last night’s insomnia. So double thanks for the post!
posted by Nancy_LockIsLit_Palmer at 5:30 AM on January 14, 2019

Is “leaving my kickers behind” a English and/or Lesbian idiom?
posted by TheShadowKnows at 6:43 AM on January 14, 2019

Knickers, not kickers. As in, underwear.

Not an idiom so much as just an implication that she'd removed her underwear and you can infer why that might be.
posted by explosion at 7:29 AM on January 14, 2019 [7 favorites]

Knickers = panties in UK English.
posted by soren_lorensen at 8:34 AM on January 14, 2019