Untold creatures of the deep!

March 8, 2006 11:44 AM

The hydrothermal vents between Easter Island and Juan Fernandez are considered to be the Earth's fastest spreading center at approximately 150km per million years. Not only is this a geological hotspot, but a biological one too where at temperatures of up to 187c and depths of 2200m researchers have discovered amongst other things a blind hairy albino lobster. Ladies, gentlemen and MeFites I present to you Kiwa hirsute (aka The Yeti Crab).
posted by furtive (46 comments total)

Learning that the world contains a species of hairy lobster (It's a lobster! With hair!) has made me immensely happy. I don't know why. Please don't try to psychoanalyze me.
posted by Faint of Butt at 11:49 AM on March 8, 2006

Hairy clams I can wrap my mind around... but lobster?!?
posted by hincandenza at 11:53 AM on March 8, 2006

Please don't try to psychoanalyze me.

Your mom had hair.

Thus, we can infer you were pinched on the penis by a lobster as a child.

From this day forward, you only sing songs about lobsters and what you imagine are "lobster noises."

The child is polymorphously perverse!
posted by sonofsamiam at 11:55 AM on March 8, 2006

It measures about 15 centimetres from tip to toe, or about the size of a salad plate, said Michel Segonzac of the French Institute of Research for the Study and Exploitation of the Sea.

I'm glad to see that science in France is still conducted in dining units.
posted by liam at 11:56 AM on March 8, 2006 [1 favorite]

Faint of Butt: I had the same reaction! My guess is that the hairs make up for the lack of eyesight (well duh, there's no light down there) in aiding the Yeti Crab to detect it's surroundings.
posted by furtive at 11:57 AM on March 8, 2006

If only we were still living in the 1800s. I'd love to see the fashionable rich wearing lobsterskin coats.
posted by nebulawindphone at 11:57 AM on March 8, 2006

This is neat and all, but how is it with drawn butter?
posted by ryoshu at 12:00 PM on March 8, 2006

I saw this on cnn.com this morning, and I knew it'd make its way over here sooner or later. I'm surprised and pleased to see that it came with additional interesting links about the habitat of this new Muppet-like critter.
posted by Gator at 12:08 PM on March 8, 2006

I wonder if they scream when they're boiled.
posted by horsewithnoname at 12:09 PM on March 8, 2006

That thing is simply awesome. It's almost huggable.
posted by pmbuko at 12:14 PM on March 8, 2006

I wish they would've named it after Johnny and Edgar Winter,
posted by NoMich at 12:19 PM on March 8, 2006

How did enough lobsters find their way to this spot, that a new species could develop? Are there blind lobsters just wandering aimlessly around the Pacific? I'm baffled.
posted by MetalDog at 12:20 PM on March 8, 2006

It only takes two. And then their offspring need to stick around...
posted by pmbuko at 12:22 PM on March 8, 2006

Holy fucking shit.

They really are related to spiders. I used to think they were just nuggets of deliciousness, but now you won't get me to ever touch another with a ten-foot crab-cracker.

That picture will give me nightmares for a week.
posted by booksandlibretti at 12:22 PM on March 8, 2006

It can't be hair in the mammalian sense. It must be "cilia" or some such structure, yes? Still: how convenient that it's the size of a salad plate. One must appreciate nature's efficiency.
posted by Lockjaw at 12:24 PM on March 8, 2006

I'm just waiting for the Farrah Fawcett photoshop.
posted by sonofsamiam at 12:25 PM on March 8, 2006

I hope no one tells the Bene Geserit.
posted by PenDevil at 12:28 PM on March 8, 2006

I hope no one tells the Bene Geserit.

Awesome.

Heh, there's already a Wikipedia entry for it.
posted by Gator at 12:33 PM on March 8, 2006

PenDevil, you totally stole my thunder. Kudos.
posted by JeffK at 12:38 PM on March 8, 2006

I await entreaties from the Kiwa Hirsute Aid Society to finance tiny waterproof white canes and courses in Braille.
posted by Cranberry at 12:39 PM on March 8, 2006

Thanks Gator! Yeah, Wikipedia has Much Larger photo. Oh, and this part was interesting:

The "hairy" pincers contain filamentous bacteria, which the creature may use to detoxify poisonous minerals from the water emitted by the hydrothermal vents where it lives.
posted by furtive at 12:39 PM on March 8, 2006

Okay, at risk of damaging my Geekitude standings, I have to say I don't get the Bene Geserit reference, and I've read the first 3 books.

??
posted by Parannoyed at 12:42 PM on March 8, 2006

Did you see the Lynch movie?
posted by Gator at 12:43 PM on March 8, 2006

OK... I've read Dune, but could somebody explain the Bene Geserit joke to me?
posted by kaseijin at 12:44 PM on March 8, 2006

saw the movie, but don't remember any references to lobster...
posted by Parannoyed at 12:46 PM on March 8, 2006

Seeing how far underwater they live, they must have a high internal pressure. I imagine they'd explode if you tried to cook 'em.

Which would be great fun, actually. Much better than your average lobster boil. They're like God's own MRE bombs.
posted by nebulawindphone at 12:46 PM on March 8, 2006

Maybe this wasn't the actual intent of the joke, but when I saw the Bene Geserit reference I immediately thought of the Navigators as they were portrayed in the Lynch movie.
posted by Gator at 12:53 PM on March 8, 2006

"Kiwa hirsute" reminded me of "Kwisatz Haderach"
posted by JeffK at 12:53 PM on March 8, 2006

two random questions:

1. when they caught said lobster w/ the submarine...if they just brought it in (via airlock or something), it would explode, right? cuz it is built to live at high pressure

2. could you boil it? if it lives next to these super hot vents, you might be giving it a cold bath...
posted by cgs at 12:54 PM on March 8, 2006

It's a lot less funny when I explain it.
posted by JeffK at 12:54 PM on March 8, 2006

It's still funny to me, since I obviously missed the point the first time around. /blush
posted by Gator at 12:56 PM on March 8, 2006

Allez Cuisine!
posted by Cyrano at 12:57 PM on March 8, 2006

Yeti Crab was my pro-wrestling name.
posted by Smedleyman at 1:09 PM on March 8, 2006

Coming soon to a sockpuppet MeFi account near you!
posted by Gator at 1:10 PM on March 8, 2006

This page will clue you in to the Dune joke.
posted by pmbuko at 1:16 PM on March 8, 2006

Holy cow you people are nerdy.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 1:23 PM on March 8, 2006

I, for one, welcome our new yeti crab overlords.
posted by sharpener at 1:59 PM on March 8, 2006

sorry, forgot the </obligatory>
posted by sharpener at 1:59 PM on March 8, 2006

posted by visit beautiful mount weather! at 3:46 PM on March 8, 2006

Looks tasty. I wonder if it turns bright orange when boiled, since it lives near hydrothermal vents.
posted by Balisong at 4:59 PM on March 8, 2006

If you bring it up slowly, it shouldn't explode. I get the impression (maybe falsely) that though the animals they pull up get a little messed up from the decompression scientists can bring most things up from the briney deep without destroying them.
posted by joegester at 5:00 PM on March 8, 2006

Faint of Butt:

You're not the only one. It was the only bright spot in a cruddy day.

Yeti Crab = a ventful of happiness.
posted by ltracey at 5:25 PM on March 8, 2006

This is so great. It is 2006 and there are still marvelous new species to be discovered in the remote parts of the globe.

(And a nicely constructed post, by the way!)
posted by LarryC at 7:25 PM on March 8, 2006

Yes, good post, furtive. Here's an interesting site with cool links.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 10:42 PM on March 8, 2006

Yeticrab — it's what for Mugato's dinner. (Tyree and Yutan like it, too.)
posted by rob511 at 11:39 PM on March 8, 2006

Not only is this an interesting post, but it's also a great example of how to take a news story and flesh it out into a proper MetaFilter post, instead of being a one-link wonder. And it spawned a humorous and interesting discussion too! Nice work, furtive.
posted by baphomet at 9:55 AM on March 9, 2006