...and now all I've got are these things...
April 8, 2008 2:05 AM Subscribe
The Museum of Broken Relationships. We've all been there. What else are you supposed to do with the garden gnome you lobbed at his car, or the axe you used to chop her furniture into tiny bits.
Or the box, made of matches, that somehow helped to make it all alright?
„I love you“ – WHAT A LIE! LIES, DAMN LIES! Yes, it's like that when you are young, naïve and in love. And you don't realize your boyfriend started dating you just because he wanted to take you to bed! I got this teddy bear for Valentine's. He survived on top of a wardrobe in a plastic bag. Only because it wasn’t him who hurt me, but the idiot who left him behind.
Museum of Broken Relationships? More like a Living Shrine of Hard, Bitter Feelings.
posted by three blind mice at 5:27 AM on April 8, 2008
Museum of Broken Relationships? More like a Living Shrine of Hard, Bitter Feelings.
posted by three blind mice at 5:27 AM on April 8, 2008
Previously... The museum didn't have a website at the time though, so this is a nice update.
posted by Dr-Baa at 5:30 AM on April 8, 2008
posted by Dr-Baa at 5:30 AM on April 8, 2008
Thanks Dr-Baa, and man, that radar link is bitter.
posted by From Bklyn at 6:02 AM on April 8, 2008
posted by From Bklyn at 6:02 AM on April 8, 2008
This is fantastic. Many of the stories are making me tear up. Also, I was surprised to see how often the "breakup" tag has been used here. I guess the internet is full of heartbreak.
posted by piratebowling at 6:07 AM on April 8, 2008
posted by piratebowling at 6:07 AM on April 8, 2008
Museum of Broken Relationships? More like a Living Shrine of Hard, Bitter Feelings.
If you read some of the other stories you'll see many of them are poignant and even sweet. People are trying to make sense out of their past and shape their burden of memories so that they're more comfortable to carry when moving forward. As everyone does....
A former roommate of mine was once given a promise ring by a boyfriend. He claimed it was very expensive, that he had broken the bank to buy it for her. Later she discovered it came from the Avon catalogue and cost $20. Whenever she was depressed about being single she would get it out and laugh at it.
A college boyfriend of mine asked me to knit him a piano scarf. I dutifully began making him one for Christmas, though I found it just beyond tacky and cheesy and had to drive myself to make something that was so at odds with my own taste. We broke up in early December. He didn't behave that well, so I didn't want to go ahead and give him the scarf, but I was at a loss as to what to do with it. There was no point ravelling it out because as a poor college student I'd used a poor yarn. I gave it to my sister, because she plays the piano, but she didn't really want it either. So it wound up in the dress up/toy box in my parents' basement and my nieces and nephews played with it. I think it might still be there, though it would be in rough shape by now. I resolved that I would never again make something that was so against the grain of my own aesthetic standards - and I never have. If someone I care about wants something, I find a way to make it so that it's pleasing to both the recipient and me.
A year and a half ago, 13 years after we'd broken up, my ex and I got back into touch, and he's now a good friend of mine. I still knit, so he asked me if I could knit him a piano scarf. I told him the story of the piano scarf he had never gotten. He got all wistful, but I was unmoved. I'll knit him a blue scarf sometime, to go with his blue eyes and now silvered hair. And for the man I currently have my sights set on, I have a sweater pattern and a colour mentally selected. I've gotten very sure of my taste in the past 15 or so years, both in knitting projects and in men.
posted by orange swan at 7:03 AM on April 8, 2008 [4 favorites]
If you read some of the other stories you'll see many of them are poignant and even sweet. People are trying to make sense out of their past and shape their burden of memories so that they're more comfortable to carry when moving forward. As everyone does....
A former roommate of mine was once given a promise ring by a boyfriend. He claimed it was very expensive, that he had broken the bank to buy it for her. Later she discovered it came from the Avon catalogue and cost $20. Whenever she was depressed about being single she would get it out and laugh at it.
A college boyfriend of mine asked me to knit him a piano scarf. I dutifully began making him one for Christmas, though I found it just beyond tacky and cheesy and had to drive myself to make something that was so at odds with my own taste. We broke up in early December. He didn't behave that well, so I didn't want to go ahead and give him the scarf, but I was at a loss as to what to do with it. There was no point ravelling it out because as a poor college student I'd used a poor yarn. I gave it to my sister, because she plays the piano, but she didn't really want it either. So it wound up in the dress up/toy box in my parents' basement and my nieces and nephews played with it. I think it might still be there, though it would be in rough shape by now. I resolved that I would never again make something that was so against the grain of my own aesthetic standards - and I never have. If someone I care about wants something, I find a way to make it so that it's pleasing to both the recipient and me.
A year and a half ago, 13 years after we'd broken up, my ex and I got back into touch, and he's now a good friend of mine. I still knit, so he asked me if I could knit him a piano scarf. I told him the story of the piano scarf he had never gotten. He got all wistful, but I was unmoved. I'll knit him a blue scarf sometime, to go with his blue eyes and now silvered hair. And for the man I currently have my sights set on, I have a sweater pattern and a colour mentally selected. I've gotten very sure of my taste in the past 15 or so years, both in knitting projects and in men.
posted by orange swan at 7:03 AM on April 8, 2008 [4 favorites]
Wow, orange swan, I didn't know the sweater curse applied to scarves too...
posted by jenfullmoon at 8:41 AM on April 8, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by jenfullmoon at 8:41 AM on April 8, 2008 [1 favorite]
Oh yeah. One time I was knitting a scarf for someone for Christmas when he called me, again in early December, and dumped me. I almost immediately sat down in my kitchen and ravelled it out, returned the unused skeins, and used the one I'd begun to make something else. I think it went into a friend's little son's sweater. I could learn from yarn. It's so forgiving and adaptable.
posted by orange swan at 9:17 AM on April 8, 2008 [6 favorites]
posted by orange swan at 9:17 AM on April 8, 2008 [6 favorites]
Kickass song, grounded.
Also, I think the prosthetic leg takes the cake.
posted by Rangeboy at 9:21 AM on April 8, 2008
Also, I think the prosthetic leg takes the cake.
posted by Rangeboy at 9:21 AM on April 8, 2008
(Re: The Bowl)
"You wanted me to bake bread. Because a woman kneading dough is so erotic. You probably thought I’d work up such a sweat that it would drip from my brasts directly into the bowl."
Damn, I hate typos. Do I get all hot and bothered over the mental image of a nubile young woman with naked breasts gleaming with the perspiration of hard work, or mentally skip right past the gripe from some kludge who's ticked because she just sweated all over the German sausage?
It makes a difference, people! Be more careful next time.
posted by Mike D at 10:59 AM on April 8, 2008
"You wanted me to bake bread. Because a woman kneading dough is so erotic. You probably thought I’d work up such a sweat that it would drip from my brasts directly into the bowl."
Damn, I hate typos. Do I get all hot and bothered over the mental image of a nubile young woman with naked breasts gleaming with the perspiration of hard work, or mentally skip right past the gripe from some kludge who's ticked because she just sweated all over the German sausage?
It makes a difference, people! Be more careful next time.
posted by Mike D at 10:59 AM on April 8, 2008
People are trying to make sense out of their past and shape their burden of memories so that they're more comfortable to carry when moving forward. As everyone does....
Fair enough Orange Swan. Keeping an item is a way to keep the memory - sweet, poignant, bitter or whatever it may be - in a state where it is tolerable.
I guess I'm not one to look behind without some of those uncomfortable feelings. My museum of broken relationships has lots of halls and no exhibits.
Just the exit signs glowing a dull green.
posted by three blind mice at 1:11 PM on April 8, 2008
Fair enough Orange Swan. Keeping an item is a way to keep the memory - sweet, poignant, bitter or whatever it may be - in a state where it is tolerable.
I guess I'm not one to look behind without some of those uncomfortable feelings. My museum of broken relationships has lots of halls and no exhibits.
Just the exit signs glowing a dull green.
posted by three blind mice at 1:11 PM on April 8, 2008
This is depressing to read and more than a little voyeuristic, but some of the stories make it worth it.
posted by Phire at 9:01 PM on April 8, 2008
posted by Phire at 9:01 PM on April 8, 2008
Would Lisa Left Eye Lopez be in the museum's hall of fame?
posted by dasheekeejones at 4:07 AM on April 9, 2008
posted by dasheekeejones at 4:07 AM on April 9, 2008
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posted by LSK at 5:05 AM on April 8, 2008