Been Caught Stealin'
April 13, 2011 6:45 AM Subscribe
The urge is mightier than the pen for Vaclav Klaus. Of course, it goes viral, even though Chilean officials say it was a gift.
Officially it's a non-incident, but still, that video is pretty funny. The body language of President Vaclav "Yoink!" Klaus is textbook I-have-absolutely-no-idea-of-any-activities-that-may-be-occurring-at-the-end-of-my-arm.
posted by Faint of Butt at 7:03 AM on April 13, 2011 [2 favorites]
posted by Faint of Butt at 7:03 AM on April 13, 2011 [2 favorites]
I see nothing!
posted by cjorgensen at 7:23 AM on April 13, 2011
posted by cjorgensen at 7:23 AM on April 13, 2011
Why don't politicians just assume that they always have a camera on them?
posted by thsmchnekllsfascists at 7:33 AM on April 13, 2011 [2 favorites]
posted by thsmchnekllsfascists at 7:33 AM on April 13, 2011 [2 favorites]
I could tell before clicking the Wikipedia link that he was a right wing politician. I think it's the late-stage Cheneyfication.
posted by theodolite at 7:34 AM on April 13, 2011 [3 favorites]
posted by theodolite at 7:34 AM on April 13, 2011 [3 favorites]
Vaclav Klaus also borrowed a Sharpie from my desk and never returned it. Pretty sure it was him.
posted by orme at 7:35 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]
posted by orme at 7:35 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]
INSIDE THE MIND OF VACLAV KLAUS
Wha-what is this? A pen - encrusted with semi-precious lapis lazuili! Who could resist such a triumphant geegaw? Would only that I were encrusted with semi-precious lapis lazuili ... then, surely I would receive the devotion and respect that befits a bejewelled conqueror. Oh, how resplendent I would shine under the sun of the Czech Republic. And my enemies - those noxious fungoid-men who defy my every whim! - why, they would weep, WEEP before my coruscating thorax! I MUST have this gem-crusted stylus, I MUST! Yes, yes, Chilean President - I will sign your infernal treaty, promising you most-favoured nation status for the purposes of the supply of petting zoo products - it will be my "pleasure" - you FOOL! For I shall surreptitiously pocket this mighty pen, this lapis lazuili-laden wonder, and then Vaclav Klaus shall be King! HA HA HA HA HA! LORD OF LAPIS LAZUILI, ALL WILL WORSHIP Mwait - what? What is this I spy on the Chilean President's wrist? A watch with a tiny calculator on its face? A MAGIC CALCULATOR WATCH, THAT COMBINES THE ARTS OF CHRONOLOGY AND CALCULATION??? I MUST have this incredible device for my own! Yes - yes, and then Vaclav Klaus will be Lord of Time! [etc]
Next week on "INSIDE THE MIND OF" - Torgyán József, Hungarian Minister for Agriculture and Regional Development, meets a child eating a sticky bun.
posted by the quidnunc kid at 7:36 AM on April 13, 2011 [29 favorites]
Wha-what is this? A pen - encrusted with semi-precious lapis lazuili! Who could resist such a triumphant geegaw? Would only that I were encrusted with semi-precious lapis lazuili ... then, surely I would receive the devotion and respect that befits a bejewelled conqueror. Oh, how resplendent I would shine under the sun of the Czech Republic. And my enemies - those noxious fungoid-men who defy my every whim! - why, they would weep, WEEP before my coruscating thorax! I MUST have this gem-crusted stylus, I MUST! Yes, yes, Chilean President - I will sign your infernal treaty, promising you most-favoured nation status for the purposes of the supply of petting zoo products - it will be my "pleasure" - you FOOL! For I shall surreptitiously pocket this mighty pen, this lapis lazuili-laden wonder, and then Vaclav Klaus shall be King! HA HA HA HA HA! LORD OF LAPIS LAZUILI, ALL WILL WORSHIP Mwait - what? What is this I spy on the Chilean President's wrist? A watch with a tiny calculator on its face? A MAGIC CALCULATOR WATCH, THAT COMBINES THE ARTS OF CHRONOLOGY AND CALCULATION??? I MUST have this incredible device for my own! Yes - yes, and then Vaclav Klaus will be Lord of Time! [etc]
Next week on "INSIDE THE MIND OF" - Torgyán József, Hungarian Minister for Agriculture and Regional Development, meets a child eating a sticky bun.
posted by the quidnunc kid at 7:36 AM on April 13, 2011 [29 favorites]
If that's a gift, then I'd like to know why the subterfuge? Also, who opens the gift while being introduced, doesn't thank anyone and leaves the box on the table?
posted by DU at 8:02 AM on April 13, 2011
posted by DU at 8:02 AM on April 13, 2011
I love that gift is the Swedish word for poison and to be married. All relevant metaphorical concepts somehow.
posted by Foci for Analysis at 8:05 AM on April 13, 2011
posted by Foci for Analysis at 8:05 AM on April 13, 2011
I believe it was Vaclav Klaus that took my virginity as well... that little stinker!
posted by tomswift at 8:06 AM on April 13, 2011
posted by tomswift at 8:06 AM on April 13, 2011
Some people are really possessive of their pens.
posted by chambers at 8:07 AM on April 13, 2011 [2 favorites]
posted by chambers at 8:07 AM on April 13, 2011 [2 favorites]
Anyone have a picture of the pen itself? I want to see if I'd steal it too.
posted by rmless at 8:17 AM on April 13, 2011
posted by rmless at 8:17 AM on April 13, 2011
It'll probably end up in the back of a drawer somewhere with all the other once-coveted pens; stripped of status, forgotten, unused. Meanwhile, Klaus will raid the supply closet and snag far more cheap Pilot ballpoints than he'll ever need.
That's usually how it went when I used to work in a government office, anyway.
posted by Greg_Ace at 8:22 AM on April 13, 2011
That's usually how it went when I used to work in a government office, anyway.
posted by Greg_Ace at 8:22 AM on April 13, 2011
Next, Vaclav Klaus meets with the diplomatic contingent from Pen Island.
posted by peeedro at 8:32 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]
posted by peeedro at 8:32 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]
Some people are really possessive of their pens.
posted by chambers at 9:07 AM
My LINNNNNK!
Someone stole my LINK!
posted by mazola at 8:57 AM on April 13, 2011
posted by chambers at 9:07 AM
My Pen!
posted by mazola at 9:42 AM
My LINNNNNK!
Someone stole my LINK!
posted by mazola at 8:57 AM on April 13, 2011
I love the music the news people used for this video.
posted by of strange foe at 10:55 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]
posted by of strange foe at 10:55 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]
It's weird to see Chile in a FPP. I always think "Oh god, what did we do now?".
posted by Memo at 11:21 AM on April 13, 2011 [2 favorites]
posted by Memo at 11:21 AM on April 13, 2011 [2 favorites]
I could tell before clicking the Wikipedia link that he was a right wing politician.
A pen stealing incident turned me into a conservative. This is what happened. I was at a seminar one time, we were seated at tables next to each other arranged in a horseshoe configuration with the speaker at the front. They sent a sign-up sheet around and when it got to me, I signed it. I noticed that my neighbor didn't have a pen so I let him borrow my VERY NICE GOLD-COLORED PEN expecting him to return it after writing his name. But he didn't do it. Instead he passed my VERY NICE PEN to his neighbor. By now, the speaker had started his talk so I couldn't very well get up and retrieve it. And my pen started going around the horseshoe, getting further and further away as the seminar went on. I wanted to hear what the speaker was saying so I convinced myself that I'd just wait until the seminar was over and get the pen back then. But at some point I looked over and noticed that although the sign up sheet was still going around, the pen accompanying it was no longer a VERY NICE PEN. It was a cheap plastic BIC thing with a chewed-up twist cap.
Anyhow at the end of the seminar, i was torn about what to do. It was just a pen, but it was a VERY NICE one. But more than that, I decided I wasn't going to let someone get away with it. I went over to the place in the horseshoe where I guessed it had disappeared and announced in a loud voice: "Has anyone seen my PEN?" and then made harsh fascistic eye contact with the prime suspects. After an awkward silence, one of them a senior citizen said "yes" and sheepishly removed it from his pocket.
So the lesson I learned from this was that
a) pen stealing turns likeable people like myself into fascists
b) senior citizens should be punished.
posted by storybored at 11:54 AM on April 13, 2011 [5 favorites]
A pen stealing incident turned me into a conservative. This is what happened. I was at a seminar one time, we were seated at tables next to each other arranged in a horseshoe configuration with the speaker at the front. They sent a sign-up sheet around and when it got to me, I signed it. I noticed that my neighbor didn't have a pen so I let him borrow my VERY NICE GOLD-COLORED PEN expecting him to return it after writing his name. But he didn't do it. Instead he passed my VERY NICE PEN to his neighbor. By now, the speaker had started his talk so I couldn't very well get up and retrieve it. And my pen started going around the horseshoe, getting further and further away as the seminar went on. I wanted to hear what the speaker was saying so I convinced myself that I'd just wait until the seminar was over and get the pen back then. But at some point I looked over and noticed that although the sign up sheet was still going around, the pen accompanying it was no longer a VERY NICE PEN. It was a cheap plastic BIC thing with a chewed-up twist cap.
Anyhow at the end of the seminar, i was torn about what to do. It was just a pen, but it was a VERY NICE one. But more than that, I decided I wasn't going to let someone get away with it. I went over to the place in the horseshoe where I guessed it had disappeared and announced in a loud voice: "Has anyone seen my PEN?" and then made harsh fascistic eye contact with the prime suspects. After an awkward silence, one of them a senior citizen said "yes" and sheepishly removed it from his pocket.
So the lesson I learned from this was that
a) pen stealing turns likeable people like myself into fascists
b) senior citizens should be punished.
posted by storybored at 11:54 AM on April 13, 2011 [5 favorites]
I actually carry around a shit pen to lend to foolish people without their own.
posted by typewriter at 7:37 PM on April 13, 2011
posted by typewriter at 7:37 PM on April 13, 2011
The secret to lending pens and getting them back:
- Never lend retractable pens; only lend pens with removable caps.
- Never lend the cap with the pen.
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posted by jmccw at 6:57 AM on April 13, 2011 [2 favorites]