CAUTION OSTRICH BITE

June 4, 2011 2:06 PM

Stewart's Petrified Wood is a shop off of I-40 in Holbrook, Arizona with giant animatronic dinosaurs eating, and sometimes being ridden by, somewhat decrepit mannequins. Also, there's an ostrich farm.

Yelp page. Flickr photos. Roadtrip memoirs entry.

posted by NoraReed (22 comments total)

I've been to the area. There are better petrified wood shops, for sure, but you'd be hard-pressed to find better dinosaurs anywhere south of the Hoover Dam.
posted by phunniemee at 2:13 PM on June 4, 2011 [2 favorites]

I thought this was going to be about Patrick Stewart at first.
posted by The Whelk at 2:15 PM on June 4, 2011

Stewart's Petrified Wood?
posted by ranchocalamari at 2:18 PM on June 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

Yeah, but have you seen . . . The THING?
posted by fourcheesemac at 2:20 PM on June 4, 2011 [2 favorites]

Wall Drug in SD use to have vaguely creepy animatronics in the back courtyard, including a (real) stuffed animal band that whirled around and "played" instruments or danced when you put money in. The rabbit's front leg had come partially off and as it whirled around the leg would flop about madly in a macabre fashion... it was great.

Then they went and redid the whole area and it's all 21st century touristy tame now
posted by edgeways at 2:27 PM on June 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

Stewart's Petrified Wood sounds like the title of a Daily Show update on the Weiner's weiner story.
posted by oneswellfoop at 3:49 PM on June 4, 2011

It's best to prepare for a visit to Stewart's by sleeping in a wigwam the night before.
posted by Biblio at 4:36 PM on June 4, 2011

"This wood has been hard for thousands of years. No one knows how this wood got quite so hard."
posted by drjimmy11 at 4:41 PM on June 4, 2011 [2 favorites]

Highway 40 through Arizona is a hoot. (Although The THING? is off Hwy 10) Tons of concrete dinosaurs, tourist traps, and plenty of excuses to leave the highway. (which is the entire point, of course)

Holbrook was a favorite place to stop, though I'd also highly recommend Oatman, AZ for cheesy touristy fun.
posted by ShutterBun at 6:12 PM on June 4, 2011 [2 favorites]

Here it is, Jackrabbit Trading Post, Joseph City, AZ.
posted by birdherder at 6:15 PM on June 4, 2011 [2 favorites]

this is the kind of art that should get nea funding
posted by PinkMoose at 6:48 PM on June 4, 2011

It's usually characterized as an out-of-the-way offramp in the middle of the desert, but let me tell you, New Hampshire, Vermont and upstate New York is riddled with this stuff. Storybook Land, North Pole NY - anyplace that advertises "Alpine Slides" will have a dozen different tourist traps within an hour's drive that will make this one seem exotic and exemplary.
posted by Slap*Happy at 8:10 PM on June 4, 2011

It's too bad that Arizona has had such a powerful string of bad press lately. It used to just seem like a quirky place to live.
posted by Roman Graves at 9:22 PM on June 4, 2011

It's too bad that Arizona has had such a powerful string of bad press lately. It used to just seem like a quirky place to live.

Arizona is a positively lovely place to live, provided that one stays as far away from Maricopa County as possible.
posted by kjh at 10:29 PM on June 4, 2011

My tax dollars are currently funding a Noah's Ark theme park, so...I'm used to it.
posted by Roman Graves at 11:12 PM on June 4, 2011

Any petrified porn in the petrified wood?
posted by uncanny hengeman at 11:15 PM on June 4, 2011

It's best to prepare for a visit to Stewart's by sleeping in a wigwam the night before.

I know it's called the Wigwam Motel, but c'mon: wigwam, teepee
posted by Sys Rq at 11:52 PM on June 4, 2011

Yeah... the 40 has all kinds of weird stuff going on, somewhat because parts of it dovetail with Route 66. I didn't have a chance to actually roll through, but over the weekend I saw Bearizona, a drive-through animal park in Williams, AZ.
posted by ph00dz at 5:04 AM on June 5, 2011

I will now always regret not stopping at Stewarts Petrified Wood.

Albierto's Taco House was good, though...
posted by SPUTNIK at 5:29 AM on June 5, 2011

Haha. To be ridden by someone has a hilarious double meaning in British English.
posted by dougrayrankin at 10:09 AM on June 5, 2011

I did the Route 66 drive a few years ago from Barstow to Gallup. A lot of it was kind of sad, as many of the attractions had fallen into disrepair. Stewart's Ostrich Ranch was definitely one of the saddest. The dinosaurs were decrepit, the "gift shop" was tacky, and the owner was not obviously not into it any more. I did enjoy the ostriches, though. The signs on the ostrich pens were also amusing: "CAUTION OSTRICH BITE" and "NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ACCIDENTS" (it later occurred to me that an "accident" involving an ostrich bite would involve two intentional actions: a person intending to stick their finger in the ostrich pen and the ostrich then intending to bite said finger).

The Wigwam Motel mentioned upthread is not to be missed. The original owner's daughter (now in her 70's-80's) runs the place and can tell you all about its history. The furniture in the wigwams is vintage and in immaculate condition.
posted by oozy rat in a sanitary zoo at 1:02 PM on June 5, 2011

Er, "obviously not into it", rather than "not obviously not".
posted by oozy rat in a sanitary zoo at 1:03 PM on June 5, 2011