"As with other online businesses, the site promised convenience and efficiency."
March 11, 2012 7:48 AM Subscribe
Need a spouse or uncooperative business associate taken care of? Have no fear! HitmanForHire.net is here.
Well, if there was going to be a female associate, it would be HitPERSON for Hire now, wouldn't it?
posted by Samizdata at 8:06 AM on March 11, 2012
posted by Samizdata at 8:06 AM on March 11, 2012
The various news blurbs made it sound like he got caught because of the blatant website, but really, it was because he tried to blackmail the victims instead of killing them.
posted by 445supermag at 8:08 AM on March 11, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by 445supermag at 8:08 AM on March 11, 2012 [1 favorite]
Yes.
oh, wait, that was a rhetorical question, wasn't it?
posted by HuronBob at 8:10 AM on March 11, 2012
oh, wait, that was a rhetorical question, wasn't it?
posted by HuronBob at 8:10 AM on March 11, 2012
Neckties...
Cyanide...
High voltage....
Done dirt cheap.
posted by GallonOfAlan at 8:23 AM on March 11, 2012 [4 favorites]
Cyanide...
High voltage....
Done dirt cheap.
posted by GallonOfAlan at 8:23 AM on March 11, 2012 [4 favorites]
Wait, am I missing something? What happened to the ricin in the lens case?
posted by triggerfinger at 8:26 AM on March 11, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by triggerfinger at 8:26 AM on March 11, 2012 [1 favorite]
So...Where would one go to really find a real hitman(person)?
Just wonderin'.
For a...um...
...friend.
posted by Thorzdad at 8:30 AM on March 11, 2012
Just wonderin'.
For a...um...
...friend.
posted by Thorzdad at 8:30 AM on March 11, 2012
I can provide 100% organic, boutique, locally sourced small batch killings for sustainable murder for hire.
posted by The Whelk at 8:51 AM on March 11, 2012 [2 favorites]
posted by The Whelk at 8:51 AM on March 11, 2012 [2 favorites]
craigslist
posted by LogicalDash at 8:57 AM on March 11, 2012
posted by LogicalDash at 8:57 AM on March 11, 2012
For an extra fee I will feed the body to my wild, free range, organic mushrooms. Which you can then cook into a nice victory risotto.
posted by Pink Fuzzy Bunny at 8:57 AM on March 11, 2012
posted by Pink Fuzzy Bunny at 8:57 AM on March 11, 2012
So...Where would one go to really find a real hitman(person)?
The way most inquiries of the type seem to be resolved, you can save a lot of time by putting the question to the nice people who answer the telephone at number 911.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 9:05 AM on March 11, 2012
The way most inquiries of the type seem to be resolved, you can save a lot of time by putting the question to the nice people who answer the telephone at number 911.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 9:05 AM on March 11, 2012
The Hit Man and Her... er, wait, I think I might have misunderstood this FPP.
posted by marienbad at 9:22 AM on March 11, 2012
posted by marienbad at 9:22 AM on March 11, 2012
If the site had lasted, its IPO would've been bigger than Facebook's.
posted by oneswellfoop at 9:50 AM on March 11, 2012
posted by oneswellfoop at 9:50 AM on March 11, 2012
This story reads like an angeliajolie movie.
More better: DIY.
posted by mule98J at 9:55 AM on March 11, 2012
More better: DIY.
posted by mule98J at 9:55 AM on March 11, 2012
Jeezus, it was real?
I came across the site in question a few years ago and although it seemed genuine, I thought to myself that no one would be so blase about something like that and chalked it up as a joke.
posted by DuchessProzac at 11:53 AM on March 11, 2012
I came across the site in question a few years ago and although it seemed genuine, I thought to myself that no one would be so blase about something like that and chalked it up as a joke.
posted by DuchessProzac at 11:53 AM on March 11, 2012
I inferred that the site was intended as a joke, but some people took it seriously enough that this fellow got away with blackmail using the site. Did he actually run the site? I wasn't clear on that.
posted by LogicalDash at 12:21 PM on March 11, 2012
posted by LogicalDash at 12:21 PM on March 11, 2012
There was almost certainly no actual ricin in the lens case. The recipe they referred to won't actually create any ricin.
posted by empath at 1:10 PM on March 11, 2012
posted by empath at 1:10 PM on March 11, 2012
The article said there was ricin!
Then there were the lab results that came back from the lens case: It tested positive for traces of ricin.
This detail will drive me nuts.
posted by triggerfinger at 4:07 PM on March 11, 2012
Then there were the lab results that came back from the lens case: It tested positive for traces of ricin.
This detail will drive me nuts.
posted by triggerfinger at 4:07 PM on March 11, 2012
They probably detect some castor oil byproducts, but there's zero chance there was ever any ricin. Certainly not enough to kill anyone.
Don't trust a journalist's description of a report when he has no expertise. See Peedro's links here.
posted by empath at 4:29 PM on March 11, 2012
Don't trust a journalist's description of a report when he has no expertise. See Peedro's links here.
posted by empath at 4:29 PM on March 11, 2012
I inferred that the site was intended as a joke, but some people took it seriously enough that this fellow got away with blackmail using the site.
This seems like it would make a good novel ala Dortmunder.
posted by hattifattener at 3:36 AM on March 13, 2012
This seems like it would make a good novel ala Dortmunder.
posted by hattifattener at 3:36 AM on March 13, 2012
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Maybe hitwomen are just smart enough not to be caught.
posted by Philosopher Dirtbike at 8:04 AM on March 11, 2012