I've got the powa!

September 7, 2012 2:45 PM

So, uh, apparently Jet Boards are a thing. Maybe you knew this? I did not. At first I just thought that video was kinda neat, and the idea was interesting. Then I looked at their website and found a ton of amazing photos, a lot more SCIENCE! explanations of stuff than I would have expected, and finally this promovideo which features both an endearingly cheesy original themesong, as well as lightning and explosions (GIF!). Soooooooooo yeah. Jet Boards. Apparently invented as early as 1965. Pretty sweet.
posted by lazaruslong (24 comments total)

Dear God. So much lost time to make up for.
posted by saladin at 2:48 PM on September 7, 2012 [1 favorite]

Aren't these like stand-up jet skis?
posted by Malice at 2:52 PM on September 7, 2012

Sort of? I think the idea is that there is more balancing / maneuverability / speed / g-force going on because it's kind of like a surfboard down there? I dunno, I'm not a surfer but it looks more like that.
posted by lazaruslong at 2:54 PM on September 7, 2012

But...they don't work over water! Oh, that was hoverboards? Nevermind. Please carry on.
posted by mosk at 3:06 PM on September 7, 2012

Jet Boards::Jet Skis as Skateboards::Scooters, so of course they exist.
posted by davejay at 3:16 PM on September 7, 2012 [1 favorite]

Aren't these like stand-up jet skis?

Jet Skis are stand-up...
posted by Huck500 at 3:16 PM on September 7, 2012 [3 favorites]

But...they don't work over water! Oh, that was hoverboards? Nevermind. Please carry on

Warning! You may find this depressing.
posted by phaedon at 3:22 PM on September 7, 2012 [1 favorite]

Cheap version: hop on a normal surfboard behind a ski boat. Bonus: you get to play on the wake.
posted by polyglot at 3:28 PM on September 7, 2012

Jet Boards::Jet Skis as The Cat::Duane Dibbley.
posted by pont at 3:33 PM on September 7, 2012

Uh huh. The first video, which starts with a pack of riders tearing across calm, glassy water, conveniently omits what must sound like a mob of angry hornets on cocaine. (translation - they're probably frigging noisy)

As a sailor whose preferred mode of water propulsion is inaudible... I guess I'm just grateful that where I like to be is too wavy or inaccessible for these beach-toys.

Filed under Jetskis.
posted by Artful Codger at 3:44 PM on September 7, 2012 [4 favorites]

God forbid these become popular on my river!
posted by HuronBob at 3:54 PM on September 7, 2012

polyglot, wake surfing is definitely a thing. a thing I spent a lot of time doing this summer. but cheap it is not. when you sink the entire starboard side of the boat with 1,000lbs of ballast to make the wake curl over, what you're also doing is adding enormous amounts of drag. the boat isn't going to plane out and as a result it is very fuel-intensive.

however, it is also cool. you can surf basically as long as you can stay up. you get right in that spot where you're riding the edge of the wave and it's pulling you along and you get lost in it..

these jet board things seem like wakeboarding and surfing combined. but I think I'd rather be behind the tow boat..
posted by ninjew at 4:33 PM on September 7, 2012

Price, c'mon someone here knows but isn't telling...
posted by RolandOfEld at 4:52 PM on September 7, 2012

I clicked on the thingy to buy via paypal because I was curious too. $4,400.
posted by lazaruslong at 4:54 PM on September 7, 2012

Warning! You may find this depressing.

Wait. If memory serves me, doesn't Marty go to 2015 in the second film?
posted by Hicksu at 5:04 PM on September 7, 2012

Wait. If memory serves me, doesn't Marty go to 2015 in the second film?

Not only was the year not 2012, the image looks badly faked. Seven-segment displays do not work that way.
posted by Pruitt-Igoe at 5:30 PM on September 7, 2012

Here is a real screen capture.
posted by Pruitt-Igoe at 5:31 PM on September 7, 2012 [2 favorites]

Perhaps the most interesting part is how the engine is laid out.
posted by trackofalljades at 6:15 PM on September 7, 2012

Perhaps the most interesting part is how the engine is laid out.

Neat design, but dear god that video has some of the worst copy I've ever heard.
posted by Popular Ethics at 6:44 PM on September 7, 2012

Next thing will be Yoga on them, no doubt.
posted by nostrada at 7:32 PM on September 7, 2012

some of the worst copy I've ever heard

But at least it's being read by Troy McClure!
posted by silkyd at 8:15 PM on September 7, 2012 [1 favorite]

When do the autobots get these?
posted by Chekhovian at 9:45 PM on September 7, 2012

I Was on one when working on the Isle Of Man during summer 87. Mad fun. Haven't seen one since.
posted by GallonOfAlan at 3:30 AM on September 8, 2012

More than 20 years ago I had a friend that owned one of these. It was a ton of fun to ride. Took a few tries to get the hang of.
posted by Justin Case at 1:31 PM on September 8, 2012