Get Er Done

November 18, 2012 8:30 AM

Miranda July's Foolproof Tips to Combat Procrastination. (YouTube video)

A short film by Miranda July, deleted from her movie The Future.
Miranda previously. Via Good.is

posted by sweetkid (29 comments total)

Best part of that movie, a free button in the lobby saying "I Have Seen The Future."
posted by leotrotsky at 8:34 AM on November 18, 2012

Judging from the first video, Leonard Cohen was right - it does look a bit like murder.
posted by WalkingAround at 8:43 AM on November 18, 2012 [2 favorites]

Easily foiled with a straw. Needs something more sinister, like gasoline or bleach instead of grape juice.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 8:46 AM on November 18, 2012 [4 favorites]

I expected that step 2 would involve a hammer.
posted by TwelveTwo at 8:48 AM on November 18, 2012 [1 favorite]

Foolproof tip #1: DON'T VISIT YOUTUBE
posted by infinitewindow at 8:55 AM on November 18, 2012 [4 favorites]

If it wasn't for procrastination I'd never get anything done.
posted by The Whelk at 8:59 AM on November 18, 2012 [2 favorites]

Foolproof tip #1: DON'T VISIT YOUTUBE Metafilter.
posted by 445supermag at 9:00 AM on November 18, 2012 [3 favorites]

I cannot trap all the distracting things, because *everything* is a distracting thing. Perhaps I can trap myself, instead.
posted by nat at 9:22 AM on November 18, 2012 [5 favorites]

I'll watch it later.
posted by Greg_Ace at 9:24 AM on November 18, 2012 [8 favorites]

This'll help.
posted by Artw at 9:28 AM on November 18, 2012

I cannot trap all the distracting things, because *everything* is a distracting thing. Perhaps I can trap myself, instead.

You're gonna need a bigger bowl.
posted by peeedro at 9:35 AM on November 18, 2012 [2 favorites]

That was quirky!
posted by craniac at 9:35 AM on November 18, 2012 [1 favorite]

I'm confused, how can this be a Miranda July clip when nothing random and overtly sexual happened 2/3 of the way through
posted by en forme de poire at 9:50 AM on November 18, 2012

Miranda July is a national treasure.
posted by oddman at 10:13 AM on November 18, 2012 [1 favorite]

I loved those old iBooks. They have a rough time with the web now though. I still use one at work to access an old database.
posted by Brocktoon at 10:35 AM on November 18, 2012

And those iSights go for a pretty penny now.
posted by Brocktoon at 10:36 AM on November 18, 2012

I procrastinated by watching this video.
posted by killdevil at 10:40 AM on November 18, 2012 [3 favorites]

I could put everything I own under a bowl and still procrastinate... stare out of the window or go for a walk.

Though seriously, since I switched to Autofocus, I've cut down procrastination by about 90% (although using it you do tend to concentrate on the easy trivial stuff, the hard stuff does get done eventually)
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 11:54 AM on November 18, 2012 [2 favorites]

I'm staggered by the revelation that July went out with Megatron (who can only have been about twelve at the time). But they're both tall so I suppose it makes sense.
posted by tigrefacile at 12:02 PM on November 18, 2012

Brows Held High reviews You And Me And Everyone We Know (which he doesn't like)

and The Future (which he likes better and goes deeper into July's oeuvre, so to speak)

Also introducing us to the phrase Miranda July-a-like, which is just fun to say.
posted by The Whelk at 12:39 PM on November 18, 2012

*spends the next two hours "freeing the hostage" instead of doing laundry*
posted by samsara at 2:09 PM on November 18, 2012

BUT I NEED THE DISTRACTING THING IN ORDER TO BE PRODUCTIVE
posted by bicyclefish at 5:32 PM on November 18, 2012

But how do you get the hostage out when you're done? Do you have to lap up and/or drink the juice with a straw? Finish your work before it evaporates and/or attracts ants? What if the smell of grape juice distracts you?
posted by NoraReed at 11:04 PM on November 18, 2012

Tweezers? Really?
posted by gern at 11:27 PM on November 18, 2012

Tweezers, absolutely: it's unclear how I can possibly finish writing my dissertation in the next week, but I can absolutely succeed at having perfectly plucked eyebrows and no hairs on my chin.
posted by ecsh at 5:47 AM on November 19, 2012

Next scene : Reading MeFi in my new pink dress
posted by fullerine at 6:16 AM on November 19, 2012

I'll watch it later.
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:24 AM on November 18

I was going to make this joke, but I kept putting it off.
posted by Trochanter at 9:10 AM on November 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

But how do you get the hostage out when you're done? Do you have to lap up and/or drink the juice with a straw? Finish your work before it evaporates and/or attracts ants? What if the smell of grape juice distracts you?

I have no idea, I was wondering that myself.
posted by sweetkid at 9:17 AM on November 19, 2012

If it wasn't for procrastination I'd never get anything done.

You are very welcome!
posted by procrastination at 9:55 AM on November 19, 2012 [1 favorite]