Old Spice Red
December 4, 2012 1:04 PM Subscribe
Dikembe Mutombo's 4 1/2 Weeks to Save the World is the tale of the struggle of Dikembe Mutombo to prevent the end of the world due to the Mayan calendar running out of time. You have to stop people from dancing Gangnam style and persuade Ohio to vote; you have to destroy cheap Black Friday toys; you have to destroy the Powerball winning numbers to prevent a literal Hollywood fatcat from producing another Vampire romance. And the game is an ad for a product that appears once in the loading screen.
Advertising firm Wieden+Kennedy comes up with the concepts for each weekly installment and Canabalt creator Adam Saltsman implements them. Expect two more episodes before the end of the world. More info.
The concept of a basketball player as a gaming hero has precedent in indie darling Barkley, Shut Up and Jam: Gaiden and older games such as Michael Jordan: Chaos in the Windy City and Shaq Fu.
Advertising firm Wieden+Kennedy comes up with the concepts for each weekly installment and Canabalt creator Adam Saltsman implements them. Expect two more episodes before the end of the world. More info.
The concept of a basketball player as a gaming hero has precedent in indie darling Barkley, Shut Up and Jam: Gaiden and older games such as Michael Jordan: Chaos in the Windy City and Shaq Fu.
You can't. All you can do is wait for it to run its course, like The Chicken Dance and The Macarena.
posted by The Card Cheat at 1:13 PM on December 4, 2012
posted by The Card Cheat at 1:13 PM on December 4, 2012
I want to sex the Mutombo.
posted by cell divide at 1:14 PM on December 4, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by cell divide at 1:14 PM on December 4, 2012 [1 favorite]
A few years ago I was on a basketball team, we named ourselves after his possibly apocryphal quote, "Who Wants To Sex Mutombo?" That question plays a role in this game, right? I can't imagine how it wouldn't.
posted by troika at 1:14 PM on December 4, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by troika at 1:14 PM on December 4, 2012 [1 favorite]
Zeitgeisty.
posted by benito.strauss at 1:15 PM on December 4, 2012
posted by benito.strauss at 1:15 PM on December 4, 2012
just like the gypsy lady predicted!
posted by boo_radley at 1:15 PM on December 4, 2012
posted by boo_radley at 1:15 PM on December 4, 2012
Actually the Old Spice reappears as a jetpack/giant deodorant.
posted by kittensofthenight at 1:18 PM on December 4, 2012
posted by kittensofthenight at 1:18 PM on December 4, 2012
Dikembe used to come into my office all the time - once a month or so. I'm six feet tall. Seated I think he's still taller than me.
Its always amusing seeing peoples reactions to a 7'2'' guy walking around an office in a suit.
And I think his voice is even deeper in real life
posted by JPD at 1:22 PM on December 4, 2012 [1 favorite]
Its always amusing seeing peoples reactions to a 7'2'' guy walking around an office in a suit.
And I think his voice is even deeper in real life
posted by JPD at 1:22 PM on December 4, 2012 [1 favorite]
Really, wouldn't we all be better off if the "final question" on this season of Doctor Who were, "Who wants to sex Mutombo?"
posted by Navelgazer at 1:26 PM on December 4, 2012 [5 favorites]
posted by Navelgazer at 1:26 PM on December 4, 2012 [5 favorites]
And the game is an ad for a product that appears once in the loading screen.
Multiple loading screens. And in intro cutscenes. And you throw hundreds of them at dancers in order to get them to stop dancing.
posted by JHarris at 1:28 PM on December 4, 2012
Multiple loading screens. And in intro cutscenes. And you throw hundreds of them at dancers in order to get them to stop dancing.
posted by JHarris at 1:28 PM on December 4, 2012
You know I'm eventually going to get tired of being pandered to in this fashion but today is not that day
OH NO THERE ARE CHILDREN IN THE FACTORY
posted by The Whelk at 1:30 PM on December 4, 2012 [2 favorites]
OH NO THERE ARE CHILDREN IN THE FACTORY
posted by The Whelk at 1:30 PM on December 4, 2012 [2 favorites]
Does it involve killing anyone who posts Grumpy Cat pictures? Because that took about four days to go from "Oh, heh. The cat looks grumpy." to "OH GOD MAKE IT STOP IT'S NOT FUNNY NO MATTER WHAT TEXT IS ACCOMPANYING IT!"
Or maybe I'm just grumpy. LIKE THE CAT!
posted by bondcliff at 1:30 PM on December 4, 2012 [3 favorites]
Or maybe I'm just grumpy. LIKE THE CAT!
posted by bondcliff at 1:30 PM on December 4, 2012 [3 favorites]
"Dikembe Mutombo" actually means "tale of the struggle" in Congolese.
posted by phaedon at 1:32 PM on December 4, 2012
posted by phaedon at 1:32 PM on December 4, 2012
You know who else was grumpy? That's right: Hitler's cat.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 1:33 PM on December 4, 2012
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 1:33 PM on December 4, 2012
That reminds me to use "Gangnam Style" as the name of my disease the next time I play "Plague, Inc."
posted by DWRoelands at 1:33 PM on December 4, 2012 [3 favorites]
posted by DWRoelands at 1:33 PM on December 4, 2012 [3 favorites]
And you throw hundreds of them at dancers in order to get them to stop dancing.
They are ballots. Although you use them to stop the laser-emitting teens in the third one.
posted by ersatz at 1:37 PM on December 4, 2012
They are ballots. Although you use them to stop the laser-emitting teens in the third one.
posted by ersatz at 1:37 PM on December 4, 2012
The thing is, if Old Spice didn't smell like Grampa @$$ to me, I would totally buy it to support these sort of things.
My boss caught me playing it and I didn't care.
"What is that!?"
"I have to help Dikembe Mutombo stop Ohio from dancing and vote to prevent the end of the world"
"What's he strapped to?"
"Old Spice"
posted by The Power Nap at 1:41 PM on December 4, 2012 [6 favorites]
My boss caught me playing it and I didn't care.
"What is that!?"
"I have to help Dikembe Mutombo stop Ohio from dancing and vote to prevent the end of the world"
"What's he strapped to?"
"Old Spice"
posted by The Power Nap at 1:41 PM on December 4, 2012 [6 favorites]
That reminds me to use "Gangnam Style" as the name of my disease the next time I play "Plague, Inc."
Or the name of my religion next time I play Civ V.
posted by Navelgazer at 1:42 PM on December 4, 2012
Or the name of my religion next time I play Civ V.
posted by Navelgazer at 1:42 PM on December 4, 2012
Obligatory Onion link: Senator Dikembe Mutombo Blocks a Record Amount of Legislation
posted by .kobayashi. at 1:48 PM on December 4, 2012
posted by .kobayashi. at 1:48 PM on December 4, 2012
Why would you want to keep these people from dancing Gangnam Style?
posted by ChuraChura at 2:00 PM on December 4, 2012 [2 favorites]
posted by ChuraChura at 2:00 PM on December 4, 2012 [2 favorites]
You have to stop people from dancing Gangnam style
The invisible horsemen of the apocalypse.
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 2:06 PM on December 4, 2012 [2 favorites]
The invisible horsemen of the apocalypse.
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 2:06 PM on December 4, 2012 [2 favorites]
I'm not sure of the backstory. Anyone care to explain why Dikembe Mutombo is supposed to be funny?
posted by Keith Talent at 2:35 PM on December 4, 2012
posted by Keith Talent at 2:35 PM on December 4, 2012
I'm not sure of the backstory. Anyone care to explain why Dikembe Mutombo is supposed to be funny?
1. Basketball centers have a history of being perceived as funny/goofy/nutty. Sometimes it's because they're actually funny/goofy/nutty (Shaq and Bill Walton come to mind) but sometimes it's just because they're comically tall and goofy looking (Gheorge Muresan, Manute Bol.)
2. He really is a funny guy. During his playing career, he was known for his post-shot-block finger wag celebration until the NBA cracked down on it as an unsportsmanlike gesture. He's also a great interview who doesn't take himself too seriously.
3. He talks like the Cookie Monster.
In addition to being a funny guy, he's a great fit for a "save the world" type game, because he's done a ton of philanthropic work. His foundation built a hospital in the Congo, and he's been active in various world hunger relief efforts.
posted by tonycpsu at 3:02 PM on December 4, 2012 [3 favorites]
1. Basketball centers have a history of being perceived as funny/goofy/nutty. Sometimes it's because they're actually funny/goofy/nutty (Shaq and Bill Walton come to mind) but sometimes it's just because they're comically tall and goofy looking (Gheorge Muresan, Manute Bol.)
2. He really is a funny guy. During his playing career, he was known for his post-shot-block finger wag celebration until the NBA cracked down on it as an unsportsmanlike gesture. He's also a great interview who doesn't take himself too seriously.
3. He talks like the Cookie Monster.
In addition to being a funny guy, he's a great fit for a "save the world" type game, because he's done a ton of philanthropic work. His foundation built a hospital in the Congo, and he's been active in various world hunger relief efforts.
posted by tonycpsu at 3:02 PM on December 4, 2012 [3 favorites]
Okay, so to recap. He's a pretty awesome guy. Smart and charitable. He seems to have a sense of humour about himself. He talks like cookie monster.
Fuck he is pretty great. This is the kind of thing I miss not watching the NBA.
posted by Keith Talent at 3:05 PM on December 4, 2012 [2 favorites]
Fuck he is pretty great. This is the kind of thing I miss not watching the NBA.
posted by Keith Talent at 3:05 PM on December 4, 2012 [2 favorites]
Between this and the skrillex/zelda thing earlier, it's like we're in some crazy bizarro world where advergames are actually decent.
posted by juv3nal at 3:24 PM on December 4, 2012
posted by juv3nal at 3:24 PM on December 4, 2012
The thing is, if Old Spice didn't smell like Grampa @$$ to me, I would totally buy it to support these sort of things.
Old Spice: If your grandfather didn't smell like this, you wouldn't be here today.
posted by davros42 at 3:31 PM on December 4, 2012 [8 favorites]
Old Spice: If your grandfather didn't smell like this, you wouldn't be here today.
posted by davros42 at 3:31 PM on December 4, 2012 [8 favorites]
He talks like cookie monster.
He talks like the cookie monster.
posted by JHarris at 4:14 PM on December 4, 2012 [2 favorites]
He talks like the cookie monster.
posted by JHarris at 4:14 PM on December 4, 2012 [2 favorites]
That reminds me to use "Gangnam Style" as the name of my disease the next time I play "Plague, Inc."
Or the name of my religion next time I play Civ V.
I'm not sure if it's as good as "butts", since messages like "Jakarta wants butts" popping up makes me giggle. "Cock" and "buttsex" are also good substitutes.
Also it is totally worth losing the life to kill blurgies and make the little 8-bit children cry.
posted by NoraReed at 4:37 PM on December 4, 2012 [1 favorite]
Or the name of my religion next time I play Civ V.
I'm not sure if it's as good as "butts", since messages like "Jakarta wants butts" popping up makes me giggle. "Cock" and "buttsex" are also good substitutes.
Also it is totally worth losing the life to kill blurgies and make the little 8-bit children cry.
posted by NoraReed at 4:37 PM on December 4, 2012 [1 favorite]
Pretty good, but it's no Frog Fractions.
posted by Caduceus at 5:27 PM on December 4, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by Caduceus at 5:27 PM on December 4, 2012 [1 favorite]
It took me a while to realize what the title theme is.
I wonder if they scripted his distinctive way of SHOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUTING things, or if that's just how he does it.
posted by BiggerJ at 7:12 PM on December 4, 2012
I wonder if they scripted his distinctive way of SHOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUTING things, or if that's just how he does it.
posted by BiggerJ at 7:12 PM on December 4, 2012
UGH, how do you block Capitalist Fat Cat when he's charging at you?!
posted by tickingclock at 9:18 PM on December 4, 2012
posted by tickingclock at 9:18 PM on December 4, 2012
JHarris: "And the game is an ad for a product that appears once in the loading screen.
Multiple loading screens. And in intro cutscenes. And you throw hundreds of them at dancers in order to get them to stop dancing."
Is that what I was throwing? I thought they were like... little anime dolls.
I didn't play the fist couple levels, just part 3 and I died from that damned fiscal cliff... HAHAHA!. This is surprisingly good. Even the gameplay isn't that shabby.
posted by symbioid at 9:46 PM on December 4, 2012
Multiple loading screens. And in intro cutscenes. And you throw hundreds of them at dancers in order to get them to stop dancing."
Is that what I was throwing? I thought they were like... little anime dolls.
I didn't play the fist couple levels, just part 3 and I died from that damned fiscal cliff... HAHAHA!. This is surprisingly good. Even the gameplay isn't that shabby.
posted by symbioid at 9:46 PM on December 4, 2012
In the first level, you throw ballots at people. In level three, it's Old Spice. In level two, it's...ssomething we'll all miss dearly.
posted by BiggerJ at 2:32 AM on December 5, 2012
posted by BiggerJ at 2:32 AM on December 5, 2012
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Now how am I supposed to do that?
posted by Egg Shen at 1:08 PM on December 4, 2012 [1 favorite]