A Beautiful Angel
July 16, 2013 12:19 PM Subscribe
Talia Castellano, the 13-year-old terminal cancer patient whose makeup tips made her a YouTube star, an honorary Cover Girl and a guest on Ellen DeGeneres's talk show, has died at age 13.
Talia's journey had previously been mentioned in this thread.
Talia's journey had previously been mentioned in this thread.
I'm just gonna go over here and throw some things and yell "FUCK CANCER" for a while. Be back in a bit when I'm coherent.
posted by Tomorrowful at 12:28 PM on July 16, 2013 [5 favorites]
posted by Tomorrowful at 12:28 PM on July 16, 2013 [5 favorites]
:(.
posted by Katjusa Roquette at 12:41 PM on July 16, 2013
posted by Katjusa Roquette at 12:41 PM on July 16, 2013
.
This strikes close to home.
Cancer has affected me deeply in the last couple of years and for the record, I absolutely detest the "fuck cancer" slogan people throw around. It's probably just me but it seems pitifully trite. YMMV.
posted by Rumple at 12:55 PM on July 16, 2013 [22 favorites]
This strikes close to home.
Cancer has affected me deeply in the last couple of years and for the record, I absolutely detest the "fuck cancer" slogan people throw around. It's probably just me but it seems pitifully trite. YMMV.
posted by Rumple at 12:55 PM on July 16, 2013 [22 favorites]
I'm trying to watch the vlogs on her website about her time in the hospital. But I'm a father and I have to hit pause, get up, and walk away from the computer every fifteen seconds.
posted by 256 at 12:55 PM on July 16, 2013
posted by 256 at 12:55 PM on July 16, 2013
Wishing as hard as I can every ounce of love and hope and peace I could possibly muster for her family and friends, because... holy shit this hurts.
Safe travels Talia.
posted by BigHeartedGuy at 12:56 PM on July 16, 2013
Safe travels Talia.
posted by BigHeartedGuy at 12:56 PM on July 16, 2013
.
posted by scaryblackdeath at 12:58 PM on July 16, 2013
posted by scaryblackdeath at 12:58 PM on July 16, 2013
Argh. What a brave girl. Just keep swimming. You leave a lot of gratitude in your wake.
posted by phaedon at 1:03 PM on July 16, 2013 [2 favorites]
posted by phaedon at 1:03 PM on July 16, 2013 [2 favorites]
.
posted by mean cheez at 1:03 PM on July 16, 2013
posted by mean cheez at 1:03 PM on July 16, 2013
That's so sad. I had seen her on Ellen and thought she seemed a beautiful young girl, inside and out.
posted by CrazyLemonade at 1:22 PM on July 16, 2013
posted by CrazyLemonade at 1:22 PM on July 16, 2013
Glad she got the chance to make her mark. Oh, and fuck cancer.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 1:22 PM on July 16, 2013
posted by The Underpants Monster at 1:22 PM on July 16, 2013
The closest I get to believing in "afterlife" is witnessing the love of life and gratitude for it that just burns through from this kid in a stupid five-minute talk show clip. That can't just end up extinguished.
posted by thinkpiece at 1:24 PM on July 16, 2013 [2 favorites]
posted by thinkpiece at 1:24 PM on July 16, 2013 [2 favorites]
.
posted by Halloween Jack at 1:27 PM on July 16, 2013
posted by Halloween Jack at 1:27 PM on July 16, 2013
.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 1:31 PM on July 16, 2013
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 1:31 PM on July 16, 2013
Cancer is something nobody should have to go through, let alone a child.
I hope someday humanity will be like Naked Mole Rats.
God Bless the family.
posted by QueerAngel28 at 1:37 PM on July 16, 2013
I hope someday humanity will be like Naked Mole Rats.
God Bless the family.
posted by QueerAngel28 at 1:37 PM on July 16, 2013
A baby niece of mine died of ATRT so "Fuck Cancer" is a phrase I use a lot. Eloquent and uniquely insightful it's not, but it expresses how I feel pretty well. That experience is part of why I was following Talia's story. She was an amazing, bright, good person and I'm sorry to see her gone.
.
posted by Drinky Die at 1:43 PM on July 16, 2013 [2 favorites]
.
posted by Drinky Die at 1:43 PM on July 16, 2013 [2 favorites]
:(
I'm gonna go watch some of her videos and see if I can do 1/8 as good a job on my makeup as she did on hers.
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posted by Sophie1 at 1:56 PM on July 16, 2013
I'm gonna go watch some of her videos and see if I can do 1/8 as good a job on my makeup as she did on hers.
.
posted by Sophie1 at 1:56 PM on July 16, 2013
The pain of loss is always harder the younger and brighter they are.
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posted by Mojojojo at 2:31 PM on July 16, 2013
.
posted by Mojojojo at 2:31 PM on July 16, 2013
Well, Rumple, maybe you think its trite to say Fuck Cancer, but as I've lost a 9 year old nephew to a brain tumour, one of my oldest best friends lost his 6 year old to neuroblastoma, my mom lost her husband to bladder cancer, I lost my (non-smoking) uncle to lung cancer, my (non-drinking) aunt to liver cancer, and my wife's best friend got a very odd, rare cardiac cancer that struck and killed this mom of 3 within a month this Christmas, I don't really know what else to say but Fuck Cancer.
Please advise for some more useful reaction, I could use it.
posted by C.A.S. at 2:42 PM on July 16, 2013 [11 favorites]
Please advise for some more useful reaction, I could use it.
posted by C.A.S. at 2:42 PM on July 16, 2013 [11 favorites]
Everyone's different, but yeah, both prior to and since my own diagnosis, I've been in the Fuck Cancer corner. No stupid-ass pink ribbons for me. I want to rage.
posted by etaoin at 3:30 PM on July 16, 2013 [7 favorites]
posted by etaoin at 3:30 PM on July 16, 2013 [7 favorites]
.
posted by oceanjesse at 3:57 PM on July 16, 2013
posted by oceanjesse at 3:57 PM on July 16, 2013
Person 1: I am so upset by something so unspeakably horrible!
Person 2: (Rolls eyes) uggggh, that emotion is so last season.
Fuck cancer.
posted by basicchannel at 4:20 PM on July 16, 2013 [3 favorites]
Person 2: (Rolls eyes) uggggh, that emotion is so last season.
Fuck cancer.
posted by basicchannel at 4:20 PM on July 16, 2013 [3 favorites]
.
posted by LittleMissCranky at 5:00 PM on July 16, 2013
posted by LittleMissCranky at 5:00 PM on July 16, 2013
Sleep well, beautiful girl.
posted by kimberussell at 5:34 PM on July 16, 2013
posted by kimberussell at 5:34 PM on July 16, 2013
.
posted by jim in austin at 5:38 PM on July 16, 2013
posted by jim in austin at 5:38 PM on July 16, 2013
.
posted by cristinacristinacristina at 6:09 PM on July 16, 2013
posted by cristinacristinacristina at 6:09 PM on July 16, 2013
Everyone's different, but yeah, both prior to and since my own diagnosis, I've been in the Fuck Cancer corner. No stupid-ass pink ribbons for me. I want to rage.
I'm the same way. Ever since my diagnosis at 33 I am all about the rage against the disease. None of that "positivity will save you; cancer is a gift bull shit" here.
Fuck cancer.
Rest in peace, Talia. I'm so sorry this horrible damn thing took you away from your family so very young.
posted by SuzySmith at 8:17 PM on July 16, 2013 [1 favorite]
I'm the same way. Ever since my diagnosis at 33 I am all about the rage against the disease. None of that "positivity will save you; cancer is a gift bull shit" here.
Fuck cancer.
Rest in peace, Talia. I'm so sorry this horrible damn thing took you away from your family so very young.
posted by SuzySmith at 8:17 PM on July 16, 2013 [1 favorite]
I have a toddler with cancer so I think at the least I am entitled to my opinion on the "fuck cancer" meme.
But to each their own.
posted by Rumple at 8:38 PM on July 16, 2013 [1 favorite]
But to each their own.
posted by Rumple at 8:38 PM on July 16, 2013 [1 favorite]
Cancer is such an asshole.
Talia was a bright and shining star, and I am grateful for her time in this world, even though it was entirely too short. Sleep sweet, beautiful Talia. We should all be as optimistic and cheery as you.
.
posted by MissySedai at 9:25 PM on July 16, 2013
Talia was a bright and shining star, and I am grateful for her time in this world, even though it was entirely too short. Sleep sweet, beautiful Talia. We should all be as optimistic and cheery as you.
.
posted by MissySedai at 9:25 PM on July 16, 2013
If my cancer had worked its way much further down my uterus, I'd have been literally fucking cancer, so I feel entitled to the epithet.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 10:07 PM on July 16, 2013 [1 favorite]
posted by The Underpants Monster at 10:07 PM on July 16, 2013 [1 favorite]
Rumple, of course. I'm not arguing with you; just reaching a different conclusion about how I see it. As I said, everyone's different. And peace to you and your family.
posted by etaoin at 10:15 PM on July 16, 2013
posted by etaoin at 10:15 PM on July 16, 2013
Everyone is entitled to an opinion, but nobody is extra-entitled to an especially judgmental passive-aggressive "fucking detestable pitifully trite but to each his own YMMV" response to other people who probably share their own feelings about a unanimously horrible thing in a different way. I guess the trite / banal thing is simply expressing a dislike of cancer in a sloganeering sort of way, kind of like the "." and I've sometimes shared your sentiment but never felt it appropriate to declare it out loud.
What I got from your comment that I don't get from "fuck cancer" was "hey everyone, cancer affects me in a way none of you probably understand, and you're just banally saying something thoughtlessly because you don't really get it like I do, or maybe you do and that's just how you deal, whatever." That's a hugely insensitive brush to tar everyone with especially considering how likely it is that others are directly affected by the disease.
Like, I can't stand people who say "I'll pray for you" or whatever, but I don't walk into rooms full of people saying that and tell them they're [saying] fucking pitiful [things] to blithely make each other feel good about themselves.
It's terrible what you're going through, I wish you and your toddler the best.
posted by lordaych at 10:27 PM on July 16, 2013 [3 favorites]
What I got from your comment that I don't get from "fuck cancer" was "hey everyone, cancer affects me in a way none of you probably understand, and you're just banally saying something thoughtlessly because you don't really get it like I do, or maybe you do and that's just how you deal, whatever." That's a hugely insensitive brush to tar everyone with especially considering how likely it is that others are directly affected by the disease.
Like, I can't stand people who say "I'll pray for you" or whatever, but I don't walk into rooms full of people saying that and tell them they're [saying] fucking pitiful [things] to blithely make each other feel good about themselves.
It's terrible what you're going through, I wish you and your toddler the best.
posted by lordaych at 10:27 PM on July 16, 2013 [3 favorites]
.
Talia was adorable, spirited and smart, and I enjoyed her videos despite the fact I'm about as makeup-oriented as the average cabbage.
posted by gingerest at 11:01 PM on July 16, 2013
Talia was adorable, spirited and smart, and I enjoyed her videos despite the fact I'm about as makeup-oriented as the average cabbage.
posted by gingerest at 11:01 PM on July 16, 2013
.
posted by Golden Eternity at 11:06 PM on July 16, 2013
posted by Golden Eternity at 11:06 PM on July 16, 2013
Pursuant to Rumple’s comment on the “Fuck cancer” reaction and other people’s responses to it:
To this day I have a viscerally negative reaction to “fuck cancer.” In 2006 my uncle/surrogate father (it’s complicated) was taken by lymphoma. I remember feeling “No no no, no” and “Take it back, no, I can’t” and “please god, no” and sometimes – I’m not proud of it, but sometimes – “Fuck you for leaving me, why did you wait so long to go to the doctor? This is your fault, you did this.” But mostly “Please god, bring him back, Please, I can’t do this, please no.”
‘Fuck cancer’ never occurred to me. After the funeral I came back to New York and my job in a macho division of an artsy industry where I had hoped to find comfort from friends and colleagues, but when I told people what happened, who I had lost and how, the standard reply was, “Fuck cancer.” And then a change of subject. It came across as though they didn’t want to engage with my grief, and this was the best way to show solidarity without opening the floodgates for my emotions. I wanted a hug. I wanted to cry on someone’s shoulder and be soothed and supported but all I got was “Fuck cancer.”
Two years later my cousin’s three-year-old was diagnosed with rhabdomyosarcoma. I sat with her on one of those uncomfortable and impossibly narrow benches/beds meant for parents in her son’s room at the children’s hospital while the nurse administered his first ever round of chemo. When he wanted to use the bathroom the nurse showed my cousin how to position the plastic pad on her hip before lifting him so that if any urine leaked on their way to the toilet she would be protected. “My baby’s first radioactive pee,” she said.
An hour later, one glass each into the bottle of wine I had smuggled inside, she looked at her toddler, sleeping with his mouth open because the tumor was blocking his nasal passages, and said, “Fuck cancer.” Yeah. Fuck cancer.
posted by philotes at 1:46 AM on July 17, 2013 [2 favorites]
To this day I have a viscerally negative reaction to “fuck cancer.” In 2006 my uncle/surrogate father (it’s complicated) was taken by lymphoma. I remember feeling “No no no, no” and “Take it back, no, I can’t” and “please god, no” and sometimes – I’m not proud of it, but sometimes – “Fuck you for leaving me, why did you wait so long to go to the doctor? This is your fault, you did this.” But mostly “Please god, bring him back, Please, I can’t do this, please no.”
‘Fuck cancer’ never occurred to me. After the funeral I came back to New York and my job in a macho division of an artsy industry where I had hoped to find comfort from friends and colleagues, but when I told people what happened, who I had lost and how, the standard reply was, “Fuck cancer.” And then a change of subject. It came across as though they didn’t want to engage with my grief, and this was the best way to show solidarity without opening the floodgates for my emotions. I wanted a hug. I wanted to cry on someone’s shoulder and be soothed and supported but all I got was “Fuck cancer.”
Two years later my cousin’s three-year-old was diagnosed with rhabdomyosarcoma. I sat with her on one of those uncomfortable and impossibly narrow benches/beds meant for parents in her son’s room at the children’s hospital while the nurse administered his first ever round of chemo. When he wanted to use the bathroom the nurse showed my cousin how to position the plastic pad on her hip before lifting him so that if any urine leaked on their way to the toilet she would be protected. “My baby’s first radioactive pee,” she said.
An hour later, one glass each into the bottle of wine I had smuggled inside, she looked at her toddler, sleeping with his mouth open because the tumor was blocking his nasal passages, and said, “Fuck cancer.” Yeah. Fuck cancer.
posted by philotes at 1:46 AM on July 17, 2013 [2 favorites]
Mod note: Just a note: There might be an extended conversation/debate to be had about the "fuck cancer" catch phrase and how people feel about it in another sort of thread, but since this is an obit post for Talia Castellano, it might be better not to let it take over here. Thanks.
posted by taz (staff) at 2:47 AM on July 17, 2013 [3 favorites]
posted by taz (staff) at 2:47 AM on July 17, 2013 [3 favorites]
To expand on spitbull's comment: cancer is not just one disease (PhD comics).
posted by lalochezia at 5:40 AM on July 17, 2013 [2 favorites]
posted by lalochezia at 5:40 AM on July 17, 2013 [2 favorites]
Once you enter CancerWorld you see how much like regular life it all is.
I'm sure you mean something I'm not getting? You can get out, but you can never leave. It's not like regular life at all. Not at all. After four times, I'm in a parallel existence. I can fake it very well, mind you, but regular life is a thing of the past.
But I can't remember what it's like to not black-worry every time a bruise heals slowly, or a funny pain crops up in my back, or a headache strikes. Not to mention, the permanent game-face so my anxiety is not contagious to friends and family (of course they're supportive, but all anyone really wants is for me to be OK).
What I will say sounds corny: it can be the most incredible gift. Life may not be regular, but it's so sweet I weep with gratitude fairly frequently! I shrug off the small stuff, that's for sure.
posted by thinkpiece at 7:40 AM on July 17, 2013
I'm sure you mean something I'm not getting? You can get out, but you can never leave. It's not like regular life at all. Not at all. After four times, I'm in a parallel existence. I can fake it very well, mind you, but regular life is a thing of the past.
But I can't remember what it's like to not black-worry every time a bruise heals slowly, or a funny pain crops up in my back, or a headache strikes. Not to mention, the permanent game-face so my anxiety is not contagious to friends and family (of course they're supportive, but all anyone really wants is for me to be OK).
What I will say sounds corny: it can be the most incredible gift. Life may not be regular, but it's so sweet I weep with gratitude fairly frequently! I shrug off the small stuff, that's for sure.
posted by thinkpiece at 7:40 AM on July 17, 2013
OK, then, fuck all cancers. Fuck the one that I narrowly escaped, will almost certainly never recur, but left me with permanent side effects. Fuck the one that killed my dear friend within a month of diagnosis. Fuck the one my coworker is living a full, happy life with with day-to-day, and probably will for many years the same way I do with my chronic illnesses. Fuck the one that made my Grandma's last months painful, even though she'd lived a long, full life and was ready to go. Fuck the three different ones that have left another friend weaker each time. I have enough fucks to go around.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 11:34 AM on July 17, 2013
posted by The Underpants Monster at 11:34 AM on July 17, 2013
I sincerely apologize for the hurt feelings and offense caused by my emotional response to "fuck cancer", and the ensuent derail.
I wish peace and good health to all and their loved ones.
posted by Rumple at 11:51 AM on July 17, 2013 [2 favorites]
I wish peace and good health to all and their loved ones.
posted by Rumple at 11:51 AM on July 17, 2013 [2 favorites]
.
posted by mistersquid at 12:58 PM on July 17, 2013
posted by mistersquid at 12:58 PM on July 17, 2013
Rumple, no hurt feelings on my part at all, peace to you as well, lets all get through these wars together however it works for any of us
posted by C.A.S. at 1:43 PM on July 17, 2013 [1 favorite]
posted by C.A.S. at 1:43 PM on July 17, 2013 [1 favorite]
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