New information from a very old brain

October 29, 2013 11:19 AM

Some sites are calling this the oldest brain found. However, there have been other finds and at least one major site in Florida that holds older remains. The trick now is to extract DNA and information that can aid in medical advances.
posted by Eicats (18 comments total)

I'm available to help.
posted by brain_drain at 11:29 AM on October 29, 2013 [6 favorites]

Shaken, scorched and boiled in its own juices

This is exactly how I order my brains at Waffle House.
posted by Metroid Baby at 11:35 AM on October 29, 2013 [14 favorites]

Then, one day in 1982, a backhoe operator who was demucking the pond during work for a new housing development noticed bones sticking out of the ground. The police were called in, but they quickly determined these deaths were not recent.

Let 'em rest in peace and all that, but I think it would be pretty cool to be at the center of a crime scene investigation in a few thousand years.

*See that liver.... looks like he was poisoned.*
posted by three blind mice at 11:36 AM on October 29, 2013

Is it just a coincidence that a story about extracting braaaaaains runs so close to halloween?

Also: Is it just me or does it look like a Vegas showgirl stopped by the dig in this shot?*

*I think it's me. The color makes the hot pants look gold and the white object in the background looks like dangly earrings. Either that or somebody wore platform shoes, gold lame hot pants, and dangly earrings to a dig. It was 1982 after all.
posted by The 10th Regiment of Foot at 11:37 AM on October 29, 2013 [5 favorites]

The 10th Regiment of Foot: "*I think it's me. The color makes the hot pants look gold and the white object in the background looks like dangly earrings. Either that or somebody wore platform shoes, gold lame hot pants, and dangly earrings to a dig. It was 1982 after all."

Khaki shorts, a swimsuit underneath, and the "platform shoes" is a quart-bottle behind one of her feet.

Seriously: get off the internet and go get laid. I'm saying this as your doctor.

IANYD.
posted by IAmBroom at 12:09 PM on October 29, 2013 [7 favorites]

Khaki shorts, a swimsuit underneath, and the "platform shoes" is a quart-bottle behind one of her feet.

Sad thing is there aren't any women in any of the other photos so the "swimsuit" could be an apron on a shirtless guy. Then again, it could be a guy in a women's backless one-piece too.
posted by The 10th Regiment of Foot at 12:18 PM on October 29, 2013 [1 favorite]

This is exactly how I order my brains at Waffle House.

And by the time the scientists are finished with it, it'll probably be Scattered, Chunked, and Diced as well.
posted by Greg_Ace at 12:30 PM on October 29, 2013 [1 favorite]

Please, the terms are Aliquotted, Homogenized, and Lysed.
posted by maryr at 12:46 PM on October 29, 2013 [5 favorites]

Ehh...tomayto, tomahto.
posted by Greg_Ace at 12:56 PM on October 29, 2013

Come to think of it, I don't think tomato is an option; just salsa
posted by Greg_Ace at 12:58 PM on October 29, 2013

I believe you mean Solanum lycopersicum.
posted by maryr at 12:58 PM on October 29, 2013 [2 favorites]

Greg_Ace: "This is exactly how I order my brains at Waffle House.

And by the time the scientists are finished with it, it'll probably be Scattered, Chunked, and Diced as well."

Great, now I have the munchies for Waffle House brains.

Which are generally in short supply. (ba-dum tish!)
posted by IAmBroom at 1:26 PM on October 29, 2013

Oh hell. You mean in addition to the alligators, stingrays, sharks, feral hogs, chupacabras, retirees' driving skills, and Skunk Apes, I now have to worry about the Revenge of the Bog People?

I can't take much more of you, Florida.
posted by cmyk at 1:51 PM on October 29, 2013

Metafilter: get off the internet and go get laid.
posted by Halloween Jack at 2:26 PM on October 29, 2013 [1 favorite]

"... this small, peat-bottomed pond situated roughly between Cape Canaveral and Disney World ..."

Hey, that's my id!
posted by Devonian at 2:42 PM on October 29, 2013 [2 favorites]

Come on you guys, we totally need to figure out a way to hook this up and speak to it!

(I actually had a sci-fi story idea that involved John the Baptist's beheaded brain preserved and serving as an AI in a multinational corporation fountain (the corporation was owned by JHVH, natch) which initiates could bathe in to gain eternal life via nano-tech infusion, programmed by said disembodied JtB brain....)
posted by symbioid at 4:19 PM on October 29, 2013 [1 favorite]

I have a feeling that even if you could reboot a disembodied brain it would just be like a baby when it came back online. It wouldn't remember anything.
posted by bleep at 6:32 PM on October 29, 2013 [1 favorite]

I just use a tennis racket when they come flying at me in the dark.
posted by Mr. Yuck at 11:24 AM on October 30, 2013 [1 favorite]