Meanwhile, on the blue, the thread is flagged as newsfilter

December 21, 2013 5:59 PM

How the media will report the (zombie) apocalypse.
posted by MartinWisse (31 comments total)

Yay! I was hoping someone would post this (but was too shy to do so myself) -- I think these are super well-done and funny and am kind of amazed by the attention to detail.

I LOVE the Buzzfeed "If Disney Princesses Also Died Horribly in the Apocalypse".
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 6:09 PM on December 21, 2013 [3 favorites]

I feel like the Guardian would also have that same shot of Miliband they always do and possibly something linking this to Scottish independence/the high speed rail plans.
posted by lesbiassparrow at 6:13 PM on December 21, 2013 [2 favorites]

ONLY GOATS MATTER
posted by cjorgensen at 6:25 PM on December 21, 2013 [5 favorites]

Pretty sure that Slate actually published theirs.
posted by Foci for Analysis at 6:37 PM on December 21, 2013

The Shipping Forecast is a beautiful thing.

I laughed out loud at the Daily Express one, though.

bitcoin now worth 1,000 rat carcasses
posted by BungaDunga at 6:50 PM on December 21, 2013 [4 favorites]

Challenge: What it will look like on MetaFilter?
posted by benito.strauss at 6:57 PM on December 21, 2013

Ha, that was pretty well-done!
posted by aka burlap at 7:08 PM on December 21, 2013

Metafilter: World yawns as another George Romero script is greenlighted.
posted by dances_with_sneetches at 7:18 PM on December 21, 2013

meta

"all of you who have been killed in the zombie apocolypse, check in here, and let us know how you're doing"
posted by pyramid termite at 7:18 PM on December 21, 2013 [9 favorites]

Oh my god, the scroll on the Fox News gif.
posted by Rustic Etruscan at 7:27 PM on December 21, 2013

MetaTalk: I'm getting a little tired of the constant demonization of the undead here.
posted by jquinby at 7:29 PM on December 21, 2013 [4 favorites]

I survived the Apocalypse using this One Weird Old Trick
posted by The Whelk at 7:30 PM on December 21, 2013 [2 favorites]

VICE magazine's Brave New World: Bullets and Beans Will Get You Laid
posted by jquinby at 7:31 PM on December 21, 2013 [1 favorite]

Challenge: What it will look like on MetaFilter?

Dear AskMe, I think I cracked open this skull maybe... a week ago? Then I got kind of distracted, and I forgot about it till just now. Are these brains still good?
posted by Flunkie at 7:37 PM on December 21, 2013 [8 favorites]

"why the chattering classes of Twitter are the REAL zombies" was so perfect it kinda went out and formed it's own not-even-a-joke level of unreality
posted by The Whelk at 7:37 PM on December 21, 2013 [1 favorite]

On kuro5hin, nobody will notice that anything is different.
posted by localroger at 7:41 PM on December 21, 2013 [3 favorites]

Maxim: But The Answer Is Still Axe Bodyspray
posted by Rustic Etruscan at 7:42 PM on December 21, 2013 [2 favorites]

Have we pointed out before that Tom is MeFi's Own? He's been linked here before, and he has been killing it at Buzzfeed.
posted by middleclasstool at 7:43 PM on December 21, 2013 [1 favorite]

oh man I once directed him toward finely made soaps.
posted by The Whelk at 7:47 PM on December 21, 2013 [1 favorite]

This post was deleted for the following reason: double -- jessamyn

This post was deleted for the following reason: double -- cortex

This post was deleted for the following reason: double -- restless_nomad

This post was deleted for the following reason: cat pictures seem a little lightweight considering IT'S THE END OF THE FUCKING WORLD -- mathowie

This post was deleted for the following reason: dead links -- goodnewsforthetinsane

This post was deleted for the following reason: undead links (I always wanted to make this joke) -- cortex

This post was deleted for the following reason: hello... is anybody out there still alive? hello... -- taz
posted by oneswellfoop at 7:49 PM on December 21, 2013 [21 favorites]

Apparently even "mainstream media" is just another niche pov. How can one rebel anymore except by metaizing.
posted by stbalbach at 7:50 PM on December 21, 2013 [1 favorite]

HAVE WE ALL FORGOTTEN IAN A.T'S DEFINITIVE METAFILTER POST-APOCALYPTIC STORY, REALLY?!
posted by The Whelk at 7:54 PM on December 21, 2013 [8 favorites]

New Yorker: Andy Borowitz Not Only Not Dead, But Only Surviving Writer. Enjoy
posted by Rustic Etruscan at 8:27 PM on December 21, 2013 [2 favorites]

They missed an opportunity with The Guardian:

The ancient town of Megiddo at the edge of the Palestinian Territories gave its name to Armageddon, the apocalyptic battle between good and evil at the end of days. But Israeli checkpoints and increasingly heavy-handed searches mean that locals wonder whether the apocalypse will come at all this year ...

This is illustrated by a cartoon by Steve Bell showing Benjamin Netanyahu standing on a mountain of skulls and extinguishing (or possibly fueling) a fire, with a fountain of blood coming from his firehose (or possibly his monstrously-enlarged penis).
posted by Joe in Australia at 8:41 PM on December 21, 2013

there's only one thing to say at a time like this

thanks, obama
posted by pyramid termite at 8:57 PM on December 21, 2013 [1 favorite]

I remember seeing a very similar but more elaborate apocalyptic internet thing, maybe two or three years back. As I recall, that one got a lot darker... like there was a heartbreaking Craigslist post where some lonely soul was looking for somebody to cuddle with as they waited for the end. That one may have included Metafilter too, I'm not sure.
posted by Ursula Hitler at 11:28 PM on December 21, 2013

The Times paywall was spot on. Daily Express couldn't have been anything else, perfected by the forecast being sun and showers.
posted by arcticseal at 11:59 PM on December 21, 2013 [1 favorite]

I was scrolling for more a good while before I realized that I'm laughing at the regular Buzzfeed sidebar and comments. How embarrassing.
posted by hat_eater at 3:50 AM on December 22, 2013 [2 favorites]

Ha! I noticed that, too hat_eater! I eventually became confused about what was satire and what was the actual site.
posted by taz at 4:20 AM on December 22, 2013

Can't view Buzzfeed because: hosts file.
posted by Twang at 7:31 AM on December 22, 2013

I'd love to see more of these (MeFi FPP, CBC, etc).
posted by Canageek at 1:56 PM on December 22, 2013