Now, Light Our Darkest Hour
May 5, 2014 9:34 PM Subscribe
As the hype builds for Michael Bay's latest assault on the eyes and eardrums: Transformers 4: Age of Extinction, let's take a walk down memory lane to happier times: Beyond good. Beyond evil. Beyond your wildest imagination.
Background
* The TF Wiki (Previously)
* Wikipedia
* TV Tropes
Background
* The TF Wiki (Previously)
* Wikipedia
* TV Tropes
Mod note: Post edited to remove background highlighting. Background color is happening in this MetaTalk thread; goofing in there is fine but let's not roll it out elsewhere on the site. Thanks.
posted by LobsterMitten (staff) at 9:43 PM on May 5, 2014
posted by LobsterMitten (staff) at 9:43 PM on May 5, 2014
"Morning, Peter."
"Morning, Mr Bay."
"Okay, Cullen, here are your lines for today. When you're ready."
"Hurr!...Nyarrgh!...Urrgh!...Hnng!...Arrr!...Oooh!"
"Aaand...petrol bombs! Great, that's a wrap! To post!"
posted by turbid dahlia at 9:43 PM on May 5, 2014 [6 favorites]
"Morning, Mr Bay."
"Okay, Cullen, here are your lines for today. When you're ready."
"Hurr!...Nyarrgh!...Urrgh!...Hnng!...Arrr!...Oooh!"
"Aaand...petrol bombs! Great, that's a wrap! To post!"
posted by turbid dahlia at 9:43 PM on May 5, 2014 [6 favorites]
“It’s all good. He’s a good guy, but three movies, the same guy, it’s time, you know what I’m saying?
Does Michael Bay even listen to himself talk?
posted by turbid dahlia at 9:47 PM on May 5, 2014 [4 favorites]
Does Michael Bay even listen to himself talk?
posted by turbid dahlia at 9:47 PM on May 5, 2014 [4 favorites]
Everybody I know who grew up in that era can recite at least two things from memory: the Contra code and the Universal Greeting.
posted by cribcage at 9:55 PM on May 5, 2014 [6 favorites]
posted by cribcage at 9:55 PM on May 5, 2014 [6 favorites]
Um I think we should be more concerned that Esau can apparently leave the island.
posted by littlesq at 9:58 PM on May 5, 2014
posted by littlesq at 9:58 PM on May 5, 2014
And the Fresh Prince theme song.
posted by bleep at 9:59 PM on May 5, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by bleep at 9:59 PM on May 5, 2014 [1 favorite]
Happier times?
[Spoilers for Transformers 1986]
So my young self was very excited that there was a transformers movie coming out. I loved the cartoon and I had a lot of the toys: Optimus Prime, Ironside, Prowl, Hound. I was attached enough that I still remember the names.
Most of them were dead within the first ten minutes of the movie. They stayed dead. A handful of Autobots escape the early massacres and are then hunted down. One image burned in my brain is a robot dropped in a tank of boiling metal and melting slowly, screaming.
I know this was done for cynical reasons, to try to get young me to buy a set of new toys to replace the dead. It doesn't matter - it works as drama. When [spoiler] the good guys win it feels like an earned victory at great cost against impossible odds. I can't think about it except through a lens of nostalgia but it might actually be worth watching some lazy Saturday morning.
Also, it had the most 80s soundtrack ever "...better believe you can survive..."
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 10:02 PM on May 5, 2014 [5 favorites]
[Spoilers for Transformers 1986]
So my young self was very excited that there was a transformers movie coming out. I loved the cartoon and I had a lot of the toys: Optimus Prime, Ironside, Prowl, Hound. I was attached enough that I still remember the names.
Most of them were dead within the first ten minutes of the movie. They stayed dead. A handful of Autobots escape the early massacres and are then hunted down. One image burned in my brain is a robot dropped in a tank of boiling metal and melting slowly, screaming.
I know this was done for cynical reasons, to try to get young me to buy a set of new toys to replace the dead. It doesn't matter - it works as drama. When [spoiler] the good guys win it feels like an earned victory at great cost against impossible odds. I can't think about it except through a lens of nostalgia but it might actually be worth watching some lazy Saturday morning.
Also, it had the most 80s soundtrack ever "...better believe you can survive..."
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 10:02 PM on May 5, 2014 [5 favorites]
Looking at the cast list for Transformers 4 I have to wonder: Is there any movie which cannot be made worse with the addition of Mark Wahlberg?
posted by Justinian at 10:04 PM on May 5, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by Justinian at 10:04 PM on May 5, 2014 [1 favorite]
More Transformers 1986: Orson Welles describing his role as Unicron:
You know what I did this morning? I played the voice of a toy. Some terrible robot toys from Japan that changed from one thing to another. The Japanese have funded a full-length animated cartoon about the doings of these toys, which is all bad outer-space stuff. I play a planet. I menace somebody called Something-or-other. Then I'm destroyed. My plan to destroy Whoever-it-is is thwarted and I tear myself apart on the screen.
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 10:05 PM on May 5, 2014 [23 favorites]
You know what I did this morning? I played the voice of a toy. Some terrible robot toys from Japan that changed from one thing to another. The Japanese have funded a full-length animated cartoon about the doings of these toys, which is all bad outer-space stuff. I play a planet. I menace somebody called Something-or-other. Then I'm destroyed. My plan to destroy Whoever-it-is is thwarted and I tear myself apart on the screen.
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 10:05 PM on May 5, 2014 [23 favorites]
The galaxy is full of planets of robots who speak English and live on some sort of fossil fuel, but there's very little life, sentient or otherwise, to speak of.
WHO DISRUPTS MY CORONATION?
posted by infinitewindow at 10:24 PM on May 5, 2014 [1 favorite]
WHO DISRUPTS MY CORONATION?
posted by infinitewindow at 10:24 PM on May 5, 2014 [1 favorite]
Well, we know what the sequel is.
posted by His thoughts were red thoughts at 10:25 PM on May 5, 2014 [3 favorites]
posted by His thoughts were red thoughts at 10:25 PM on May 5, 2014 [3 favorites]
The galaxy is full of planets of robots who speak English and live on some sort of fossil fuel, but there's very little life, sentient or otherwise, to speak of.
The comics are worse than the show ever was. Quoting from issue #1, page 1:
posted by cribcage at 10:39 PM on May 5, 2014 [3 favorites]
The comics are worse than the show ever was. Quoting from issue #1, page 1:
Whereas life elsewhere in the cosmos usually evolved through carbon-bonding, here it was the interaction of naturally occurring gears, levers and pulleys that miraculously brought forth sentient beings.That's right, folks. You thought Michael Bay was bad? "Naturally occurring gears, levers and pulleys." Move over, E.T. for Atari, because the people involved with the Transformers comic don't get nearly enough credit for being galactically terrible at their jobs. Those were some godawful comic books.
posted by cribcage at 10:39 PM on May 5, 2014 [3 favorites]
Here's something weird. My sister got a My Little Pony toy and audio cassette combo when she was little. The cassette was mislabeled, though, and contained a Transformers radio play that used off-model voicing and characterization. You can listen to it here (it's a little sped up and higher pitched than I recall my copy being).
SO BAD
posted by infinitewindow at 10:46 PM on May 5, 2014 [3 favorites]
SO BAD
posted by infinitewindow at 10:46 PM on May 5, 2014 [3 favorites]
Whereas life elsewhere in the cosmos usually evolved through carbon-bonding, here it was the interaction of naturally occurring gears, levers and pulleys that miraculously brought forth sentient beings.
TEACH THE CONTROVERSY.
posted by The Tensor at 10:48 PM on May 5, 2014 [32 favorites]
TEACH THE CONTROVERSY.
posted by The Tensor at 10:48 PM on May 5, 2014 [32 favorites]
Eh, at the micro scale, it's not that different from gears, levers, and pulleys. Meat is the ultimate micro machine.
posted by effugas at 10:51 PM on May 5, 2014 [2 favorites]
posted by effugas at 10:51 PM on May 5, 2014 [2 favorites]
So much awesome. My little sister and I made it a point to be at the very first matinee showing on its opening day--nearly alone in the theatre, if I remember correctly. I don't think I've ever expended that much effort since, for any movie, no matter how breathlessly excited I've been to see something.
More recently, it was a real trip to rock out to Stan Bush's cheeseball anthem "The Touch" which is available as downloadable content for Rock Band 3. The song itself is beyond 80s corny, but enjoyable with like-minded nerds at Ground Kontrol's 'Rock Band Tuesdays' here in Portland... there's certainly some 'what is this shit?' eyebrow-arching, but lots of knowing smirks-and-nods too.
posted by rodeoclown at 11:21 PM on May 5, 2014 [1 favorite]
More recently, it was a real trip to rock out to Stan Bush's cheeseball anthem "The Touch" which is available as downloadable content for Rock Band 3. The song itself is beyond 80s corny, but enjoyable with like-minded nerds at Ground Kontrol's 'Rock Band Tuesdays' here in Portland... there's certainly some 'what is this shit?' eyebrow-arching, but lots of knowing smirks-and-nods too.
posted by rodeoclown at 11:21 PM on May 5, 2014 [1 favorite]
When I saw that "beyond good beyond evil" text I first thought it might be a link to the trailer for Zardoz.
posted by JHarris at 11:49 PM on May 5, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by JHarris at 11:49 PM on May 5, 2014 [1 favorite]
Dirk Diggler - You Got the Touch
We've come full circle.
posted by XhaustedProphet at 12:20 AM on May 6, 2014 [8 favorites]
We've come full circle.
posted by XhaustedProphet at 12:20 AM on May 6, 2014 [8 favorites]
For me, this movie contained the very best of Transformers (Ultra Magnus!) and the very worst (Hot Rod/Rodimus Prime). Obviously, I feel nothing but bitterness about the events of the movie.
posted by KingEdRa at 4:39 AM on May 6, 2014
posted by KingEdRa at 4:39 AM on May 6, 2014
The opening synths of "The Touch" still give 12-year-old me chills. Megatron must be stopped, no matter the cost!
posted by echocollate at 5:29 AM on May 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by echocollate at 5:29 AM on May 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
I LOVE the 86 Transformers movie. My mom took a friend and I to see it in the theaters, and like many other 11-year-olds of the time, I was both shocked by the changes the movie made to the Transformers universe and enthralled by the more "sophisticated" presentation of what I had only seen on 22-minute cartoons.
I still remember seeing ads in my G.I. Joe comic books with the Transformers in silhouette, lined up on a horizon. I bought a few of the early issues, but the art was much too clunky compared to the precision of Rod Whigham and, later, Ron Wagner on G.I. Joe. I couldn't really afford the toys outside of birthdays and Christmas, but I still managed to get some of the major characters, a few of which I still have. I remember getting Grimlock for my 11th birthday.
So, I had some of the toys and a real love for the Transformers' world when I went to the theater for the movie. On some level I sensed that the animation was much more detailed, with much greater emphasis on mechanical precision. At the same time, the characters, particularly the new generation of Hot Rod, Kup, Springer, Ultra Magnus, etc. had more distinction and definition than the characters on the afternoon cartoon.
The death of Optimus Prime (SPOILER!) in the first 20 minutes was quite a shock. I can't think of a franchise from the era that would have done that, although I think there was a draft of the G.I. Joe cartoon movie wherein Duke died. As others have pointed out, Hasbro/Takara just wanted to encourage kids to buy the new toys. Still, for a young viewer it lent a seriousness to the movie that was unexpected. With Optimus' death, the movie felt more like "The Last Unicorn" or "Legend" to me as a young viewer - I found Optimus' death to be melancholic, and certainly not "rad." I guess I did fall for HasTak's trick, though, because I fell in love with Hot Rod. I think I cajoled my Mom into getting me the toy right after we left the movie theater.
Fast forward about 25 years. I hadn't seen the movie since childhood, and so I rented it from Netflix. I still loved it! Granted, I was willing to overlook its flaws, such as an occasionally wonky and pointless meandering of the plot. But as a designer/illustrator I definitely appreciate the artistry of the animation. I really love the oddball cast! The movie doesn't just have Orson Welles as Unicron, it also has Leonard Nimoy as Galvatron, Robert Stack as Ultra Magnus, Judd Nelson as Hot Rod and Scatman Crothers, briefly, as Jazz.
I put a copy of the movie on our iPad so that I can dip into it now and then when I'm stuck in a doctor's waiting room or something. We take the iPad with us on long car trips to Kentucky for my 3-year-old daughter to look at. Surprisingly, she found the movie and watched the whole thing enraptured. She asked me lots of questions about the movie and occasionally asks to watch it again. My favorite bit is that she sometimes randomly says lines from the movie, like "Hot Rod, there's a hole in the shuttle!" and "Not today, Galvatron!"
In honor of the Ultra Magnus fan upthread:
"Prime, I'm just a soldier." "I don't have time for that now!"
posted by Slothrop at 5:36 AM on May 6, 2014 [8 favorites]
I still remember seeing ads in my G.I. Joe comic books with the Transformers in silhouette, lined up on a horizon. I bought a few of the early issues, but the art was much too clunky compared to the precision of Rod Whigham and, later, Ron Wagner on G.I. Joe. I couldn't really afford the toys outside of birthdays and Christmas, but I still managed to get some of the major characters, a few of which I still have. I remember getting Grimlock for my 11th birthday.
So, I had some of the toys and a real love for the Transformers' world when I went to the theater for the movie. On some level I sensed that the animation was much more detailed, with much greater emphasis on mechanical precision. At the same time, the characters, particularly the new generation of Hot Rod, Kup, Springer, Ultra Magnus, etc. had more distinction and definition than the characters on the afternoon cartoon.
The death of Optimus Prime (SPOILER!) in the first 20 minutes was quite a shock. I can't think of a franchise from the era that would have done that, although I think there was a draft of the G.I. Joe cartoon movie wherein Duke died. As others have pointed out, Hasbro/Takara just wanted to encourage kids to buy the new toys. Still, for a young viewer it lent a seriousness to the movie that was unexpected. With Optimus' death, the movie felt more like "The Last Unicorn" or "Legend" to me as a young viewer - I found Optimus' death to be melancholic, and certainly not "rad." I guess I did fall for HasTak's trick, though, because I fell in love with Hot Rod. I think I cajoled my Mom into getting me the toy right after we left the movie theater.
Fast forward about 25 years. I hadn't seen the movie since childhood, and so I rented it from Netflix. I still loved it! Granted, I was willing to overlook its flaws, such as an occasionally wonky and pointless meandering of the plot. But as a designer/illustrator I definitely appreciate the artistry of the animation. I really love the oddball cast! The movie doesn't just have Orson Welles as Unicron, it also has Leonard Nimoy as Galvatron, Robert Stack as Ultra Magnus, Judd Nelson as Hot Rod and Scatman Crothers, briefly, as Jazz.
I put a copy of the movie on our iPad so that I can dip into it now and then when I'm stuck in a doctor's waiting room or something. We take the iPad with us on long car trips to Kentucky for my 3-year-old daughter to look at. Surprisingly, she found the movie and watched the whole thing enraptured. She asked me lots of questions about the movie and occasionally asks to watch it again. My favorite bit is that she sometimes randomly says lines from the movie, like "Hot Rod, there's a hole in the shuttle!" and "Not today, Galvatron!"
In honor of the Ultra Magnus fan upthread:
"Prime, I'm just a soldier." "I don't have time for that now!"
posted by Slothrop at 5:36 AM on May 6, 2014 [8 favorites]
The opening synths of "The Touch" still give 12-year-old me chills. Megatron must be stopped, no matter the cost!
In college, I went to a showing of the Transformers movie. When "The Touch" started up, basically everyone in the theater started singing along. It was awesome, but really fucking weird.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 5:44 AM on May 6, 2014 [3 favorites]
In college, I went to a showing of the Transformers movie. When "The Touch" started up, basically everyone in the theater started singing along. It was awesome, but really fucking weird.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 5:44 AM on May 6, 2014 [3 favorites]
I know this was done for cynical reasons, to try to get young me to buy a set of new toys to replace the dead. It doesn't matter - it works as drama. When [spoiler] the good guys win it feels like an earned victory at great cost against impossible odds.
My own feelings are very divided here. On the one hand, yeah, you're right, they really did ratchet up what was at stake, which makes the victory more meaningful. On the other hand, it was, as you pointed out, all done in the name of crass, crass marketing to sell new toys (when they could have just given them a new paintjob or whatever).
This is literally like killing Luke Skywalker to have DUKE HIGHTALKER come back to fight Darth Vader, who, wait, I mean, Vader died and came back as GARTH RADER, yeah, that's the ticket.
They were so focused on gritty-ing up things that, IIRC, there's even a "SHIT!" shouted out halfway through this children's movie for no reason at all.
Okay, I guess my feelings aren't that divided.
posted by middleclasstool at 5:45 AM on May 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
My own feelings are very divided here. On the one hand, yeah, you're right, they really did ratchet up what was at stake, which makes the victory more meaningful. On the other hand, it was, as you pointed out, all done in the name of crass, crass marketing to sell new toys (when they could have just given them a new paintjob or whatever).
This is literally like killing Luke Skywalker to have DUKE HIGHTALKER come back to fight Darth Vader, who, wait, I mean, Vader died and came back as GARTH RADER, yeah, that's the ticket.
They were so focused on gritty-ing up things that, IIRC, there's even a "SHIT!" shouted out halfway through this children's movie for no reason at all.
Okay, I guess my feelings aren't that divided.
posted by middleclasstool at 5:45 AM on May 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
I actually like that setup of a farmer/mechanic/whatever finding a defunct Autobot and bringing him back. It's a shame that it's going to suck.
posted by middleclasstool at 5:46 AM on May 6, 2014
posted by middleclasstool at 5:46 AM on May 6, 2014
So here's a story.
A while back, one of the classes at a school I went to was taught by an excellent fellow who'd had a hell of a storied career. He'd been a radio DJ, he'd been an ad man, and he'd worked for Hasbro. I don't know exactly what his job title at Hasbro was, but he'd tell us stories about it sometime. Apparently he'd been in marketing, at least in the general sense. He was one of a few people who'd get together and decide the direction of the franchise.
One day, he mentioned that he was one of the people who'd made the decision to go ahead and kill Optimus Prime. His reasoning was sound, it all made sense, et cetera. What he hadn't anticipated was an onslaught of angry letters from parents.
"It was crazy," he told us. "We'd get these letter from parents, yelling at us. They'd be all, 'You killed my son's hero!' Telling us their kid couldn't sleep now and everything."
He sighed, and said, "Your son's hero. It's a friggin' truck!"
They were so focused on gritty-ing up things that, IIRC, there's even a "SHIT!" shouted out halfway through this children's movie for no reason at all.
There was a reason, but it was no less crass. The swear was put in to guarantee a PG rating; at the time, a G movie couldn't be shown as many times in a day as a PG movie could. There's also the fact that PG meant it was more likely you'd have to see it with a parent, which meant they'd sell two tickets instead of one. And also, that meant that your mom or dad would be right there after the movie for you to pester to buy you the new toys you just saw.
I mean, from a simple marketing standpoint, it's all pretty brilliant: The consumer pays for the product and they pay to watch the commercials.
posted by FAMOUS MONSTER at 5:51 AM on May 6, 2014 [16 favorites]
A while back, one of the classes at a school I went to was taught by an excellent fellow who'd had a hell of a storied career. He'd been a radio DJ, he'd been an ad man, and he'd worked for Hasbro. I don't know exactly what his job title at Hasbro was, but he'd tell us stories about it sometime. Apparently he'd been in marketing, at least in the general sense. He was one of a few people who'd get together and decide the direction of the franchise.
One day, he mentioned that he was one of the people who'd made the decision to go ahead and kill Optimus Prime. His reasoning was sound, it all made sense, et cetera. What he hadn't anticipated was an onslaught of angry letters from parents.
"It was crazy," he told us. "We'd get these letter from parents, yelling at us. They'd be all, 'You killed my son's hero!' Telling us their kid couldn't sleep now and everything."
He sighed, and said, "Your son's hero. It's a friggin' truck!"
They were so focused on gritty-ing up things that, IIRC, there's even a "SHIT!" shouted out halfway through this children's movie for no reason at all.
There was a reason, but it was no less crass. The swear was put in to guarantee a PG rating; at the time, a G movie couldn't be shown as many times in a day as a PG movie could. There's also the fact that PG meant it was more likely you'd have to see it with a parent, which meant they'd sell two tickets instead of one. And also, that meant that your mom or dad would be right there after the movie for you to pester to buy you the new toys you just saw.
I mean, from a simple marketing standpoint, it's all pretty brilliant: The consumer pays for the product and they pay to watch the commercials.
posted by FAMOUS MONSTER at 5:51 AM on May 6, 2014 [16 favorites]
Apparently Grimlock will be in this movie, but I bet he won't do anything 1/10 as great as saying "Tell Grimlock about petro-rabbits" while resting his adorable dinosaur robot head between the seats in the front of the ship.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 6:01 AM on May 6, 2014 [5 favorites]
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 6:01 AM on May 6, 2014 [5 favorites]
When TFTM came out, I was just right on that cusp between playing with Transformers and collecting Transformers. I remember walking out of the movie -- literally, before I got to the parking lot, thinking, They only did all that so I would buy more Transformers. That sucked. It wasn't until years later that I saw the movie again and thought, Yeah, despite that, it's still pretty good.
posted by Etrigan at 6:04 AM on May 6, 2014
posted by Etrigan at 6:04 AM on May 6, 2014
The time has most assuredly come for a Go-Bots movie. Who wouldn't want to see Cy-Kill in all it's glory, the only transforming robot with nicotine stained teeth?
posted by dr_dank at 6:16 AM on May 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
posted by dr_dank at 6:16 AM on May 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
Metafilter: "Not today, Galvatron!"
posted by robocop is bleeding at 6:30 AM on May 6, 2014 [4 favorites]
posted by robocop is bleeding at 6:30 AM on May 6, 2014 [4 favorites]
>Everybody I know who grew up in that era can recite at least two things from memory: the Contra code and the Universal Greeting.
Baah weep graah naah weep ni ni bong!
posted by mgrichmond at 6:36 AM on May 6, 2014
Baah weep graah naah weep ni ni bong!
posted by mgrichmond at 6:36 AM on May 6, 2014
Metafilter: It was awesome, but really fucking weird.
posted by Rangeboy at 7:13 AM on May 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
posted by Rangeboy at 7:13 AM on May 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
When I went back to that movie as an adult, the thing I remember sticking out to me (aside from the way it started really strong and then fell into meandering) was just how great Leonard Nimoy's voice is. His Galvatron dominates every scene he appears in just by sounding menacing. It's tough to out-menace Frank Welker, but Nimoy nails it.
posted by COBRA! at 7:21 AM on May 6, 2014
posted by COBRA! at 7:21 AM on May 6, 2014
"Your son's hero. It's a friggin' truck!"
Well, many children may think more highly of trucks than people. Can't stay I blame them, in all cases. Also: he was probably perfectly real to them - you can see and hear him right there, on TV. When I delivered pizzas, I used to routinely see children who seemed to be expecting that the real, physical Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles were going to be riding with me.
posted by thelonius at 7:41 AM on May 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
Well, many children may think more highly of trucks than people. Can't stay I blame them, in all cases. Also: he was probably perfectly real to them - you can see and hear him right there, on TV. When I delivered pizzas, I used to routinely see children who seemed to be expecting that the real, physical Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles were going to be riding with me.
posted by thelonius at 7:41 AM on May 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
"Whereas life elsewhere in the cosmos usually evolved through carbon-bonding, here it was the interaction of naturally occurring gears, levers and pulleys that miraculously brought forth sentient beings." ... Move over, E.T. for Atari, because the people involved with the Transformers comic don't get nearly enough credit for being galactically terrible at their jobs.
Are you kidding? That line is hilariously great. If I gave someone the job of writing back-story for a planet of robots that transform into vehicles, I'd award them a bonus for coming up with something so pitch-perfectly serious/ridiculous.
posted by straight at 7:54 AM on May 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
Are you kidding? That line is hilariously great. If I gave someone the job of writing back-story for a planet of robots that transform into vehicles, I'd award them a bonus for coming up with something so pitch-perfectly serious/ridiculous.
posted by straight at 7:54 AM on May 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
I don't know about elsewhere, but the consensus among us boys when The Movie came out was that it was AWESOME that they killed off characters.
The thing with Saturday Morning Cartoons was always that nobody died or was injured. EVER. It was super lame. But the TM kicked it up a notch and it made for a really dark KIDS movie.
Plus, look at what else came out that year. Aliens, Stand By Me, Ferris Bueller, Labyrinth, Highlander, Top Gun...
I don't recall any other year where I spent as much time going to see movies as that one.
posted by Pogo_Fuzzybutt at 8:18 AM on May 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
The thing with Saturday Morning Cartoons was always that nobody died or was injured. EVER. It was super lame. But the TM kicked it up a notch and it made for a really dark KIDS movie.
Plus, look at what else came out that year. Aliens, Stand By Me, Ferris Bueller, Labyrinth, Highlander, Top Gun...
I don't recall any other year where I spent as much time going to see movies as that one.
posted by Pogo_Fuzzybutt at 8:18 AM on May 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
He sighed, and said, "Your son's hero. It's a friggin' truck!"
Bambi is a deer. You kinda wish anyone in the room during that decision would have been possessed of a little more imagination than is reflected in that li'l insight, but hey, that's the world.
posted by cribcage at 8:22 AM on May 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
Bambi is a deer. You kinda wish anyone in the room during that decision would have been possessed of a little more imagination than is reflected in that li'l insight, but hey, that's the world.
posted by cribcage at 8:22 AM on May 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
it made for a really dark KIDS movie
...but not the sort of grimdark that has passed for mature in comics since the 1990s. NOT TODAY, GALVATRON! It's a movie about hope, hope of the most shamelessly optimistic kind, hope flourishing in the most hopeless of circumstances. In the words of the Nostalgia Chick, "I don't think I have enough irony in me."
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 8:42 AM on May 6, 2014
...but not the sort of grimdark that has passed for mature in comics since the 1990s. NOT TODAY, GALVATRON! It's a movie about hope, hope of the most shamelessly optimistic kind, hope flourishing in the most hopeless of circumstances. In the words of the Nostalgia Chick, "I don't think I have enough irony in me."
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 8:42 AM on May 6, 2014
I don't know about elsewhere, but the consensus among us boys when The Movie came out was that it was AWESOME that they killed off characters.
I like to believe that a youthful exposure to Transformers: The Movie psychologically prepared us for the brutality of Game of Thrones.
Also, less facetiously, I do recall around that time that the other popular cartoon about transforming robots was Robotech, and in this cartoon, characters did die, and there was plot continuity and consequences to actions. So, seeing something like Transformers start to take on that level of sophistication was all, "yeah, American animation! Get on that bandwagon."
Except ... not so much in retrospect. Looking back, it does feel like the Transformers Movie was the last touchstone that I had with American cartoons before plunging knee deep into the then new world of Japanese anime. Once Akira came out two years later, I never looked back.
posted by bl1nk at 9:03 AM on May 6, 2014
I like to believe that a youthful exposure to Transformers: The Movie psychologically prepared us for the brutality of Game of Thrones.
Also, less facetiously, I do recall around that time that the other popular cartoon about transforming robots was Robotech, and in this cartoon, characters did die, and there was plot continuity and consequences to actions. So, seeing something like Transformers start to take on that level of sophistication was all, "yeah, American animation! Get on that bandwagon."
Except ... not so much in retrospect. Looking back, it does feel like the Transformers Movie was the last touchstone that I had with American cartoons before plunging knee deep into the then new world of Japanese anime. Once Akira came out two years later, I never looked back.
posted by bl1nk at 9:03 AM on May 6, 2014
Oh, god, the memories. When i was in 2nd grade, i loved the Transformers more than pretty much anything. I had a best friend whose name i wish i could remember (Perry Gruber, maybe?) and all we did was watch Transformers, play with Transformers, and draw Transformers. But when the movie came out, i was barely aware of it -- since my family never went to see movies in the theater, the idea of seeing movies anywhere except on our tiny 13" black-and-white TV was completely foreign to me.
One day, i was randomly going to Perry's apartment and i saw that he and his parents were going somewhere. Turns out they were going to see "The Transfomers Movie" and asked if i would like to come along.
First movie. Mind blown. And yeah, the deaths were not traumatizing, they were amazing.
I really gotta watch it again, though. The last time i saw it was in college. Very stoned. I think it held up.
posted by ELF Radio at 9:29 AM on May 6, 2014
One day, i was randomly going to Perry's apartment and i saw that he and his parents were going somewhere. Turns out they were going to see "The Transfomers Movie" and asked if i would like to come along.
First movie. Mind blown. And yeah, the deaths were not traumatizing, they were amazing.
I really gotta watch it again, though. The last time i saw it was in college. Very stoned. I think it held up.
posted by ELF Radio at 9:29 AM on May 6, 2014
The new series, Transformers Prime, was decent. They pared down the cast drastically, added four human sidekicks (three of whom were children) and focused on serialized stories. Over its run, they killed off two or three characters on the show and revisited their losses in subsequent episodes. The CGI was stylized but fun to watch. The show included humor to mixed effect. But the continuity made it interesting, as did the characterizations. Plus a few television scifi veterans were in the voice cast, including Gina Torres, Jeffrey Combs, Ernie Hudson, Adam Baldwin, Michael Ironside, Tony Todd, George Takei, and John Noble.
During season two, they introduced a nearly invincible Apex Armor for transformers. Then during an episode in season three, Miko, by far the most annoying human character, has a fun scene.
posted by zarq at 9:44 AM on May 6, 2014
During season two, they introduced a nearly invincible Apex Armor for transformers. Then during an episode in season three, Miko, by far the most annoying human character, has a fun scene.
posted by zarq at 9:44 AM on May 6, 2014
Transformers
Stand up for your rights
Get up, stand up
Robots in disguise
posted by Anything at 9:44 AM on May 6, 2014 [7 favorites]
Stand up for your rights
Get up, stand up
Robots in disguise
posted by Anything at 9:44 AM on May 6, 2014 [7 favorites]
...added four human sidekicks
This was, by far, the worst part of every Transformers story: the humans. Seriously, is there anyone among the Transformers generation who cared about, let alone identified with, Spike or Buster or Daniel? We loved Optimus Prime and Grimlock and Jetfire (or Skyfire or whatever) and Beachcomber, who by the way was awesome. Some damned adult decided there always needed to be humans present so kids could "relate"—personally I could relate just fine to a robot who transforms into a T-rex—and so we ended up with characters like Circuit Breaker and Jar Jar LaBeouf.
posted by cribcage at 10:02 AM on May 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
This was, by far, the worst part of every Transformers story: the humans. Seriously, is there anyone among the Transformers generation who cared about, let alone identified with, Spike or Buster or Daniel? We loved Optimus Prime and Grimlock and Jetfire (or Skyfire or whatever) and Beachcomber, who by the way was awesome. Some damned adult decided there always needed to be humans present so kids could "relate"—personally I could relate just fine to a robot who transforms into a T-rex—and so we ended up with characters like Circuit Breaker and Jar Jar LaBeouf.
posted by cribcage at 10:02 AM on May 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
Our local theatre never got Transformers The Movie. We did, however, get GoBots: Battle of the Rock Lords, starring Telly Savalas as a robot that turned to a rock. Yes, it was as bad as it sounds.
And has no one mentioned The Cybertronic Spree yet? They cover the amazing soundtrack from Transformers The Movie in full costume, with Hot Rod on bass and vocals, Arcee on keys and vocals, Spike Witwicky on bass, Rumble on drums, and Unicron on lead guitar. And yes that is Unicron's real moustache.
It's strange how influential the original Transformers movie remains in the popular consciousness of a very specific generation, yet it gets entirely ignored by the Michael Bay brain trust currently running the franchise. Does anyone think that in 20 years there's going to be a band covering the sound track to the Bay films in full costume?
posted by thecjm at 10:22 AM on May 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
And has no one mentioned The Cybertronic Spree yet? They cover the amazing soundtrack from Transformers The Movie in full costume, with Hot Rod on bass and vocals, Arcee on keys and vocals, Spike Witwicky on bass, Rumble on drums, and Unicron on lead guitar. And yes that is Unicron's real moustache.
It's strange how influential the original Transformers movie remains in the popular consciousness of a very specific generation, yet it gets entirely ignored by the Michael Bay brain trust currently running the franchise. Does anyone think that in 20 years there's going to be a band covering the sound track to the Bay films in full costume?
posted by thecjm at 10:22 AM on May 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
It's strange how influential the original Transformers movie remains in the popular consciousness of a very specific generation, yet it gets entirely ignored by the Michael Bay brain trust currently running the franchise.
TFTM isn't influential so much as it's fondly remembered. That is, no one wishes Rodimus Prime was still the star of the franchise and that Optimus Prime were still dead.
Plus, TFTM made back its budget. The Bay TF movies have made two billion dollars of profit.
posted by Etrigan at 10:46 AM on May 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
TFTM isn't influential so much as it's fondly remembered. That is, no one wishes Rodimus Prime was still the star of the franchise and that Optimus Prime were still dead.
Plus, TFTM made back its budget. The Bay TF movies have made two billion dollars of profit.
posted by Etrigan at 10:46 AM on May 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
Some damned adult decided there always needed to be humans present so kids could "relate"—
Pixar sure must regret firing that guy before they made Cars.
posted by straight at 11:00 AM on May 6, 2014
Pixar sure must regret firing that guy before they made Cars.
posted by straight at 11:00 AM on May 6, 2014
Prime's death was sad - the heroic death - but what really messed me up was seeing Prowl die with smoke billowing out of his mouth and eyes going dark. That kind of gruesome imagery stays with you!
Having the rest of the deaths in the shuttle attack scene handled so unceremoniously was an introduction for young me to the business of toys and the brutality of war.
posted by Therapeutic Amputations at 11:19 AM on May 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
Having the rest of the deaths in the shuttle attack scene handled so unceremoniously was an introduction for young me to the business of toys and the brutality of war.
posted by Therapeutic Amputations at 11:19 AM on May 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
Also, less facetiously, I do recall around that time that the other popular cartoon about transforming robots was Robotech, and in this cartoon, characters did die, and there was plot continuity and consequences to actions.
For the curious, the Robotech producers banged up the series out of three Japanese anime shows.
The first season, with the people flying around in transforming robot airplanes inside a giant transforming robot spaceship, was cut together out of Super Dimension Fortress Macross. The second, with the tanks and battlesuits, was made out of Super Dimension Cavalry Southern Cross, which is a barely-related spinoff of Macross. The third season, with the cross-dressing rock singer, was conflugalized out of Genesis Climber Mospeada.
The original Macross is pretty easy to find either subbed or dubbed but Southern Cross and Mospeada less so.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 12:16 PM on May 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
For the curious, the Robotech producers banged up the series out of three Japanese anime shows.
The first season, with the people flying around in transforming robot airplanes inside a giant transforming robot spaceship, was cut together out of Super Dimension Fortress Macross. The second, with the tanks and battlesuits, was made out of Super Dimension Cavalry Southern Cross, which is a barely-related spinoff of Macross. The third season, with the cross-dressing rock singer, was conflugalized out of Genesis Climber Mospeada.
The original Macross is pretty easy to find either subbed or dubbed but Southern Cross and Mospeada less so.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 12:16 PM on May 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
I wasn't sure where the post was going when I started reading it, but I'm glad it went where it did.
I don't know what a grownup seeing it for the first time would think, but it holds up to me pretty well. There's some clever jokes, like the petro-rabbits, which a lot of writers probably wouldn't even bother including for a kids movie back then. And I love the sight gag where they catch a fish, which is a "whopper" next to Daniel, but a sardine next to Hot Rod.
I was 8, watched the show religiously but for whatever reason I wasn't too phased by the deaths, I was probably too confused. But I loved all the new characters, and the futuristic setting. Reruns of pre-movie episodes felt a little more mundane afterwards.
I was surprised to first learn the show had just three seasons, and we never even got the Saturday morning first season. And while Welker was great as Megatron, his Galvatron was terrible compared to Nimoy's, whose cold menacing version I wish they'd stuck with.
I was optimistic about a potential live-action reboot, only to have Bay announce he was coming back. But I can't blame him for the fact that people pay to see his crap.
And I still have the TFTM sticker book. I never did get that Snarl backpack.
posted by TheSecretDecoderRing at 2:39 PM on May 6, 2014
I don't know what a grownup seeing it for the first time would think, but it holds up to me pretty well. There's some clever jokes, like the petro-rabbits, which a lot of writers probably wouldn't even bother including for a kids movie back then. And I love the sight gag where they catch a fish, which is a "whopper" next to Daniel, but a sardine next to Hot Rod.
I was 8, watched the show religiously but for whatever reason I wasn't too phased by the deaths, I was probably too confused. But I loved all the new characters, and the futuristic setting. Reruns of pre-movie episodes felt a little more mundane afterwards.
I was surprised to first learn the show had just three seasons, and we never even got the Saturday morning first season. And while Welker was great as Megatron, his Galvatron was terrible compared to Nimoy's, whose cold menacing version I wish they'd stuck with.
I was optimistic about a potential live-action reboot, only to have Bay announce he was coming back. But I can't blame him for the fact that people pay to see his crap.
And I still have the TFTM sticker book. I never did get that Snarl backpack.
posted by TheSecretDecoderRing at 2:39 PM on May 6, 2014
Oh, and the other day I saw that a book on the original line's packaging art is due in June. Just loitering the toy aisle looking at the art and profiles of all the TFs was another indelible part of the franchise (ditto GI Joe).
posted by TheSecretDecoderRing at 2:45 PM on May 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by TheSecretDecoderRing at 2:45 PM on May 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
Something else for the nostalgic - a Transformers/GI Joe crossover comic set firmly in the early 80's and drawn by the ghost of Jack Kirby guiding Tom Scioli's hand. Issue #0 was part of Free Comic Book Day and it was spectacular.
posted by thecjm at 2:56 PM on May 6, 2014
posted by thecjm at 2:56 PM on May 6, 2014
Something else for the nostalgic - a Transformers/GI Joe crossover comic set firmly in the early 80's...
There was an actual Transformers/GI Joe crossover in the actual '80s. It was... not spectacular.
posted by Etrigan at 3:10 PM on May 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
There was an actual Transformers/GI Joe crossover in the actual '80s. It was... not spectacular.
posted by Etrigan at 3:10 PM on May 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
I was optimistic about a potential live-action reboot, only to have Bay announce he was coming back.
Agreed. I feel the same about Peter Jackson and The Hobbit, and I'd feel the same if Christopher Nolan were doing more Batman. For me, it's less about whether these people handled the franchises well or poorly. I just want to see someone different take the reins. Half the fun of the first movie was seeing what the characters would look like. (The robots...not Megan Fox.) Sure, I'm looking forward to Grimlock, but I'd love to see a different director's take on which Transformers should be included and how they would look.
posted by cribcage at 3:15 PM on May 6, 2014
Agreed. I feel the same about Peter Jackson and The Hobbit, and I'd feel the same if Christopher Nolan were doing more Batman. For me, it's less about whether these people handled the franchises well or poorly. I just want to see someone different take the reins. Half the fun of the first movie was seeing what the characters would look like. (The robots...not Megan Fox.) Sure, I'm looking forward to Grimlock, but I'd love to see a different director's take on which Transformers should be included and how they would look.
posted by cribcage at 3:15 PM on May 6, 2014
Here's something weird. My sister got a My Little Pony toy and audio cassette combo when she was little. The cassette was mislabeled, though, and contained a Transformers radio play that used off-model voicing and characterization.
I had one of these as well. There was a scene where Starscream and Megatron are on a submarine.
Starscream: "Shall we dive?"
Megatron: "Yes, let's."
I listened to that tape hundreds and hundreds of times, but every time I misheard that exchange as:
Starscream: "Shall we die?"
Megatron: "Yes, let's."
I think that tape explains a lot about me.
posted by brundlefly at 2:54 PM on May 8, 2014 [1 favorite]
I had one of these as well. There was a scene where Starscream and Megatron are on a submarine.
Starscream: "Shall we dive?"
Megatron: "Yes, let's."
I listened to that tape hundreds and hundreds of times, but every time I misheard that exchange as:
Starscream: "Shall we die?"
Megatron: "Yes, let's."
I think that tape explains a lot about me.
posted by brundlefly at 2:54 PM on May 8, 2014 [1 favorite]
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