Figure N is an isometric view of the middle finger of his right hand.

May 12, 2014 9:29 AM

Tranform any text into a patent application
posted by a snickering nuthatch (11 comments total)

Brilliant:

"Figure 3 is a perspective view of the completely satisfied spectator"

Reads like a patent from a u/dys-topian future world.
posted by sp160n at 9:42 AM on May 12, 2014 [1 favorite]

Fantastic. The inventor of this tool should apply for a patent.
posted by mcstayinskool at 10:11 AM on May 12, 2014 [2 favorites]

Figure 1 is an isometric view of the progressive historical development of the proletariat.

I like this.
posted by schmod at 10:23 AM on May 12, 2014 [3 favorites]

Love it.
posted by benito.strauss at 10:36 AM on May 12, 2014 [1 favorite]

Wall-Street: "a system and method for fluctuating between proletariat and bourgeoisie"
posted by Monkey0nCrack at 10:48 AM on May 12, 2014 [1 favorite]

The author of this is my new hero.
posted by benzenedream at 11:11 AM on May 12, 2014 [1 favorite]

Now, we just need to figure out how to work this out in reverse, so we can take all the inane patent applications and figure out what they're actually trying to patent.
posted by Hamusutaa at 11:44 AM on May 12, 2014 [1 favorite]

figure out what they're actually trying to patent

Well, whaddya got?
posted by brennen at 12:03 PM on May 12, 2014

Given how accommodating the USPTO has been lately, this alternately amuses and terrifies me.
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 12:08 PM on May 12, 2014 [2 favorites]

this is so beautiful yes please yes
posted by lokta at 7:38 PM on May 12, 2014

Maybe you should have waited for the author to post the promise web version. I remember when the swing-ifier was posted on Metafilter but only as code, and the inputs were different between the different provided programs, causing the average non-coder-type-person to curl up in a ball and weep at its impenetrably inscrutable behavior. Of course, as things stand now, if anyone posts the web version on the front page when it comes out, the most likely response will be 'dupe, flagged, mod plz delete'. Yay.
posted by BiggerJ at 1:18 AM on May 13, 2014