Not enough chocolate to give a characteristic flavor or to warrant name
November 5, 2014 6:12 PM Subscribe
Not quite chocolate, not quite caramel, not quite taffy.
Durable. Rugged. Stands the test of time. That’s what you expect from radial tires. Not so much from candy.
And what happened to Leo Hirschfeld?
Tootsie is for the sporting types as well, as we see Lady offering a morsel to a burly line backer.
an epic battle of the generations over control for the nation’s Tootsie Rolls.
on the elusive trail of “Tootsie.”
Bonus Korean War story: "We were calling for ammunition and other supplies and they heard some of us shouting in the background, 'send us more Tootsie Rolls.' "
Durable. Rugged. Stands the test of time. That’s what you expect from radial tires. Not so much from candy.
And what happened to Leo Hirschfeld?
Tootsie is for the sporting types as well, as we see Lady offering a morsel to a burly line backer.
an epic battle of the generations over control for the nation’s Tootsie Rolls.
on the elusive trail of “Tootsie.”
Bonus Korean War story: "We were calling for ammunition and other supplies and they heard some of us shouting in the background, 'send us more Tootsie Rolls.' "
Enjoyment of Tootsie Rolls is dependent on their age, and somewhat similar to ice cream, is dependent on the outside temperature. As the Tootsie Roll becomes older and colder it transitions from a chewy chocolate treat to a slightly flavored dental tool.
posted by vapidave at 6:40 PM on November 5, 2014 [8 favorites]
posted by vapidave at 6:40 PM on November 5, 2014 [8 favorites]
Bro-man-gel-on is indeed wonderful, but I say the real story here is the Candy Professor blog itself. Great find!
posted by Atom Eyes at 6:42 PM on November 5, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by Atom Eyes at 6:42 PM on November 5, 2014 [1 favorite]
Tootsie Rolls are crap. I always knew they were crap. A Tootsie Roll Pop is a good lollipop spoiled. Whenever I got a Tootsie Roll as a kid, I would think, gross, it's a Tootsie Roll. And then I would eat it anyway. Always. I no longer understand this. I think you have to be a child to know why.
Addendum: Vanilla Tootsie Rolls aren't bad. But then it's just plain taffy, anyway.
posted by Countess Elena at 6:42 PM on November 5, 2014 [7 favorites]
Addendum: Vanilla Tootsie Rolls aren't bad. But then it's just plain taffy, anyway.
posted by Countess Elena at 6:42 PM on November 5, 2014 [7 favorites]
Vanilla Tootsie Rolls are bad and you should feel bad.
posted by Atom Eyes at 6:46 PM on November 5, 2014 [17 favorites]
posted by Atom Eyes at 6:46 PM on November 5, 2014 [17 favorites]
I have been on a Tootsie Roll bender ever since the day after Halloween. We had a huge turnout of trick-or-treaters, and had no leftover candy. So I bought a bag of Tootsie Roll midgies, and I haven't looked back.
posted by bakerina at 6:51 PM on November 5, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by bakerina at 6:51 PM on November 5, 2014 [1 favorite]
Every year I tell my kid about the candy of yore, the awesome and the awful. I swear 90% of our Hallowe'en bags was made up of a combo of Tootsie Rolls, Kraft Caramels, "candy pills" (aka Rockets) and those cruddy suckers wrapped in square cellophane. She couldn't care less as she digs into a bag made up entirely of chocolate bars (TWO full sized bars!) and chips. Kids these days.
posted by looli at 7:00 PM on November 5, 2014 [3 favorites]
posted by looli at 7:00 PM on November 5, 2014 [3 favorites]
I loved Tootsie Rolls so much as a kid that when my parents finally got me a puppy, I insisted on naming her "Tootsie Roll" and correcting anyone who tried to call her "Tootsie" or "Toots."
posted by 256 at 7:03 PM on November 5, 2014 [3 favorites]
posted by 256 at 7:03 PM on November 5, 2014 [3 favorites]
Tootsie Rolls are one step up from Necco Wafers, which is to say, only to be used in times of desperation.
posted by benito.strauss at 7:11 PM on November 5, 2014 [4 favorites]
posted by benito.strauss at 7:11 PM on November 5, 2014 [4 favorites]
"Necco Wafers [...] only to be used in times of desperation"
Tom drew a line in the dust with his big toe, and said:
"I dare you to step over that, and I'll lick you till you can't stand up. Anybody that'll take a dare will steal sheep."
posted by komara at 7:17 PM on November 5, 2014 [3 favorites]
Tom drew a line in the dust with his big toe, and said:
"I dare you to step over that, and I'll lick you till you can't stand up. Anybody that'll take a dare will steal sheep."
posted by komara at 7:17 PM on November 5, 2014 [3 favorites]
My friend discovered that if you eat a handful of equal parts M&Ms and Skittles, it tastes exactly like a Tootsie Roll. I tried it and can confirm. I really don't know what I expect anyone to do with this information, but it seemed apropos.
posted by valrus at 7:17 PM on November 5, 2014 [19 favorites]
posted by valrus at 7:17 PM on November 5, 2014 [19 favorites]
My college boyfriend once ate so many Tootsie Rolls, that his nose started running violently, and the snot was tinged Tootsie Roll brown. That certainly didn't improve my opinion of Tootsie Rolls.
posted by Coatlicue at 7:28 PM on November 5, 2014
posted by Coatlicue at 7:28 PM on November 5, 2014
Tootsie Rolls are one step up from Necco Wafers,
Actually, you can kinda slide-insert Necco Wafers into a Tootsie Roll, enlivening the look AND creating your own 'two-of-the-worst-candies-in-the-world-together-AT-LAST' sorta thing.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 7:50 PM on November 5, 2014
Actually, you can kinda slide-insert Necco Wafers into a Tootsie Roll, enlivening the look AND creating your own 'two-of-the-worst-candies-in-the-world-together-AT-LAST' sorta thing.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 7:50 PM on November 5, 2014
My wife is from a country that doesn't have Tootsie Rolls and so her first experience of them was trying one as an adult. She actually likes them and would buy them to give to kids for Halloween, eating all the leftovers over time. But she also likes natto so it may just be something with her.
posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 7:51 PM on November 5, 2014 [2 favorites]
posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 7:51 PM on November 5, 2014 [2 favorites]
The trick is to wash your Tootsie midgies down with an unassuming single malt. I recommend Auchentoshan.
posted by Iridic at 7:53 PM on November 5, 2014 [4 favorites]
posted by Iridic at 7:53 PM on November 5, 2014 [4 favorites]
You know, I've come to accept that my liking Necco wafers is just something that is genetically bred into me by virtue of having been born in New England - just like my following the Red Sox or something.
But glad to see so many other people don't get Tootsie Rolls. I always tried to eat them because they claimed to be chocolate, and I loved chocolate, but there always just seemed to be some point I was missing about them or something. And then I grew up and was buying my own candy and decided fuck Tootsie Rolls and that was that.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 8:03 PM on November 5, 2014 [2 favorites]
But glad to see so many other people don't get Tootsie Rolls. I always tried to eat them because they claimed to be chocolate, and I loved chocolate, but there always just seemed to be some point I was missing about them or something. And then I grew up and was buying my own candy and decided fuck Tootsie Rolls and that was that.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 8:03 PM on November 5, 2014 [2 favorites]
damn, I'm stuck here at work and the idea of tootsie rolls and scotch is really appealing right now.
posted by 5_13_23_42_69_666 at 8:04 PM on November 5, 2014 [2 favorites]
posted by 5_13_23_42_69_666 at 8:04 PM on November 5, 2014 [2 favorites]
I'm sorry, a Tootsie Roll post without this???
Mister Owl...
posted by evilcolonel at 8:08 PM on November 5, 2014 [2 favorites]
Mister Owl...
posted by evilcolonel at 8:08 PM on November 5, 2014 [2 favorites]
> Actually, you can kinda slide-insert Necco Wafers into a Tootsie Roll, enlivening the look AND creating your own 'two-of-the-worst-candies-in-the-world-together-AT-LAST' sorta thing.
Which just confirms my belief that Tootsies and Neccos work better as a rainy-day emergency substitute for K'nex than as candy. As a bonus, they attract ants.
posted by benito.strauss at 8:08 PM on November 5, 2014
Which just confirms my belief that Tootsies and Neccos work better as a rainy-day emergency substitute for K'nex than as candy. As a bonus, they attract ants.
posted by benito.strauss at 8:08 PM on November 5, 2014
Tootsie Rolls are one step up from Necco Wafers, which is to say, only to be used in times of desperation.
The Necco factory has gone biotech, but last I knew, you could still smell Tootsie Rolls being made in the right corner of Cambridge, MA. I haven't been over there in a while - it's probably gone the way of luxury condos now (edit: my roommate says she thinks it's still there).
posted by maryr at 8:30 PM on November 5, 2014
The Necco factory has gone biotech, but last I knew, you could still smell Tootsie Rolls being made in the right corner of Cambridge, MA. I haven't been over there in a while - it's probably gone the way of luxury condos now (edit: my roommate says she thinks it's still there).
posted by maryr at 8:30 PM on November 5, 2014
See, I like tootsie rolls. Maybe I'll go steal some from the kids' Halloween stash right now.
posted by leahwrenn at 8:31 PM on November 5, 2014 [3 favorites]
posted by leahwrenn at 8:31 PM on November 5, 2014 [3 favorites]
I was not allowed to eat chocolate as a kid--was supposed to be allergic to it (though experiments conducted later in life have not borne this out). As someone who was obliged to consider various candidates for substitution, I feel I'm able to speak with authority on this subject.
Eating a Tootsie Roll is like eating a warmed-up brown crayon along with an only-partly-chewed stick of gum to add some sugar and help you get it down. If I was marooned on an island, the Tootsie Rolls would be gone before the Circus Peanuts... but the slugs, clams, and catchable bugs would be gone before the Tootsie Rolls.
posted by Sing Or Swim at 8:41 PM on November 5, 2014 [3 favorites]
Eating a Tootsie Roll is like eating a warmed-up brown crayon along with an only-partly-chewed stick of gum to add some sugar and help you get it down. If I was marooned on an island, the Tootsie Rolls would be gone before the Circus Peanuts... but the slugs, clams, and catchable bugs would be gone before the Tootsie Rolls.
posted by Sing Or Swim at 8:41 PM on November 5, 2014 [3 favorites]
We had this Chitty Chitty Bang Bang toy back in the day, and I remember thinking that they tasted better.
(found a YouTube video demonstration of the process...)
posted by 1367 at 9:03 PM on November 5, 2014
(found a YouTube video demonstration of the process...)
posted by 1367 at 9:03 PM on November 5, 2014
My college domicile was right across the street from the necco factory before it went lab space - it was such a weird thing to wake up to mint and chocolate smells emanating from the factory in too thick clouds that clung to your nose for the walk to campus. At least later in the day the oregano and garlic from the greek pizza joint would wash it away.
posted by drewbage1847 at 9:22 PM on November 5, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by drewbage1847 at 9:22 PM on November 5, 2014 [1 favorite]
Pretty sure my mom will kick anyone's ass dissing on her favorite Tootsie Rolls. Yup.
posted by Purposeful Grimace at 9:30 PM on November 5, 2014
posted by Purposeful Grimace at 9:30 PM on November 5, 2014
I was in my 5th decade before I realized Tootsie Rolls were supposed to be some bastardized form of chocolate.
On the one hand there was chocolate. Then there's waxed paper wrapped cat turds.
posted by BlueHorse at 9:46 PM on November 5, 2014 [2 favorites]
On the one hand there was chocolate. Then there's waxed paper wrapped cat turds.
posted by BlueHorse at 9:46 PM on November 5, 2014 [2 favorites]
Necco wafers are the best b-b gun targets. They shatter in a pleasing way.
posted by idiopath at 9:53 PM on November 5, 2014 [3 favorites]
posted by idiopath at 9:53 PM on November 5, 2014 [3 favorites]
See Tootsie Rolls are basically the perfect stoned snack. They're tasty enough, you can chew on a small piece for a long time and satisfy the need to eat something, and most importantly you salivate like crazy while eating Tootsie Rolls, which combats the dry mouth. They are basically Scooby snacks for potheads.
posted by Hoopo at 9:59 PM on November 5, 2014 [2 favorites]
posted by Hoopo at 9:59 PM on November 5, 2014 [2 favorites]
Mister Owl...
Ms. Happy..
Spoiler alert: 703 licks.
posted by smidgen at 10:59 PM on November 5, 2014 [1 favorite]
Ms. Happy..
Spoiler alert: 703 licks.
posted by smidgen at 10:59 PM on November 5, 2014 [1 favorite]
I'm not really a fan of regular Tootsie Rolls, but I loves me some Tootsie Roll Pops. Especially the orange flavor. The sharp sweetness of the lollipop with the bland sweetness of the Tootsie Roll is a nice combo.
posted by zardoz at 1:34 AM on November 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
posted by zardoz at 1:34 AM on November 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
My middle school religion teacher, Father Doffing, used to throw little Tootsie Rolls at us during class for getting correct answers, and also for having the best-polished shoes. I had enjoyed them before, but once they were used for Pavlovian conditioning the bond was unbreakable!
posted by wenestvedt at 3:29 AM on November 6, 2014
posted by wenestvedt at 3:29 AM on November 6, 2014
could still smell Tootsie Rolls being made in the right corner of Cambridge, MA.
I walked down that street one morning, just a short nondescript warehouse area, and as you walked counted at least four distinct smells of different candies cooking. Steps in the process I guess.
Workers dressed in clean whites would be taking a smoke, you could tell they'd been at this their entire lives.
posted by sammyo at 3:44 AM on November 6, 2014 [4 favorites]
I walked down that street one morning, just a short nondescript warehouse area, and as you walked counted at least four distinct smells of different candies cooking. Steps in the process I guess.
Workers dressed in clean whites would be taking a smoke, you could tell they'd been at this their entire lives.
posted by sammyo at 3:44 AM on November 6, 2014 [4 favorites]
We kept a candy jar of the small ones at home. Our vet always fed one to our dog to make the visit less frightening. So, I guess I've always considered Tootsie Rolls to be dog food. I confirmed this once by eating one...
posted by jim in austin at 3:55 AM on November 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
posted by jim in austin at 3:55 AM on November 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
It's a little known true fact that Tootsie Rolls are made by boiling down Yoo-Hoo.
posted by sonascope at 4:33 AM on November 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by sonascope at 4:33 AM on November 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
As a relative to Tootsie Rolls, last night I dared to give a Tootsie Pop a go. Good grief...I couldn't believe how tiny they make them now. I mean...The pop itself was so ridiculously small, the Tootsie stuff in the middle must have been the size of a singularity.
Unfortunately, I didn't get to whatever center there may have been, as the candy shell tasted like...well...something bad. The wrapper said "raspberry" but...no...that wasn't raspberry. Not even artificial raspberry. Not in this universe, anyway. I had to toss it away.
posted by Thorzdad at 4:47 AM on November 6, 2014
Unfortunately, I didn't get to whatever center there may have been, as the candy shell tasted like...well...something bad. The wrapper said "raspberry" but...no...that wasn't raspberry. Not even artificial raspberry. Not in this universe, anyway. I had to toss it away.
posted by Thorzdad at 4:47 AM on November 6, 2014
You probably had a mini Tootsie Pop. They still make the full-sized ones.
You're right about raspberry being awful. It's pretty clearly the worst flavor.
(Tootsie Pop flavor hierarchy
You're right about raspberry being awful. It's pretty clearly the worst flavor.
(Tootsie Pop flavor hierarchy
- orange
- grape
- cherry
- chocolate
- candy cane (seasonal)
- "sixth flavor"
- raspberry)
candy cane (seasonal)
*gasp* Whaaaat? That's a thing? Why did I not know that's a thing?
posted by Lyn Never at 7:18 AM on November 6, 2014
*gasp* Whaaaat? That's a thing? Why did I not know that's a thing?
posted by Lyn Never at 7:18 AM on November 6, 2014
Oh god, they're pops covered in candy cane. No! No, bad!
I thought we were talking rolls, like orange or raspberry, except peppermint.
posted by Lyn Never at 7:20 AM on November 6, 2014
I thought we were talking rolls, like orange or raspberry, except peppermint.
posted by Lyn Never at 7:20 AM on November 6, 2014
Mr. Kitty has an obsession with Frooties which are NOT the fruit flavored tootsie rolls - but something else entirely. The taste like a tootsie roll and a jolly rancher had a baby.
I special ordered him a 5 lb bag for Christmas one year and it was demolished by New Years.
posted by Suffocating Kitty at 7:22 AM on November 6, 2014
I special ordered him a 5 lb bag for Christmas one year and it was demolished by New Years.
posted by Suffocating Kitty at 7:22 AM on November 6, 2014
Tootsie rolls are a fucking abomination, a dread evil from the abyss, a culinary slap in the face to all lovers of candy. But they're still not as bad as candy corn.
posted by poffin boffin at 7:49 AM on November 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
posted by poffin boffin at 7:49 AM on November 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
I always liked the Tootsie Roll logs but not the midges or minnies or whatever they are.
posted by maryr at 7:49 AM on November 6, 2014
posted by maryr at 7:49 AM on November 6, 2014
Tootsie Rolls are the Velveeta of candy. Even though Darrell Green claimed "...they make you run fast."
But some people love Velveeta, so who am I to condemn: I still love Mary Jane's.
posted by umberto at 7:58 AM on November 6, 2014
But some people love Velveeta, so who am I to condemn: I still love Mary Jane's.
posted by umberto at 7:58 AM on November 6, 2014
My five favourite candies are (in descending order) Necco Wafers, Circus Peanuts, Tootsie Rolls, spice flavoured jelly beans, and that weird soap-flavoured gum.
There I said it.
You can blame people like me for the continued existence of these candies.
I also like candy corn. But not Halloween Kisses.
There are limits.
posted by fimbulvetr at 7:59 AM on November 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
There I said it.
You can blame people like me for the continued existence of these candies.
I also like candy corn. But not Halloween Kisses.
There are limits.
posted by fimbulvetr at 7:59 AM on November 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
They are basically Scooby snacks for potheads.
So... Scooby snacks?
posted by PlasticSupernova at 8:07 AM on November 6, 2014 [5 favorites]
So... Scooby snacks?
posted by PlasticSupernova at 8:07 AM on November 6, 2014 [5 favorites]
I have always found the inherent waxiness of non-chocolate Tootsie Rolls oddly appealing.
posted by Halloween Jack at 8:16 AM on November 6, 2014
posted by Halloween Jack at 8:16 AM on November 6, 2014
I think you're a time-traveler, fimbulbvetr. You clearly developed your candy preferences somewhere around 1926. Is your favorite baseball team the Brooklyn Robins?
posted by benito.strauss at 8:25 AM on November 6, 2014 [5 favorites]
posted by benito.strauss at 8:25 AM on November 6, 2014 [5 favorites]
How timely. I was just eating a tootsie roll yesterday and thinking: what ARE these things? WWII era chocolate rations?
Not that it stopped me from eating it, because I am an animal.
posted by St. Peepsburg at 8:28 AM on November 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
Not that it stopped me from eating it, because I am an animal.
posted by St. Peepsburg at 8:28 AM on November 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
Man, everybody is so harsh on Tootsie Rolls. I love them. Hell, I'll eat a full-sized Tootsie Roll when the mood strikes.
And yeah, from 2001-2004 or so I walked past the Tootsie Roll factory on the way to work every day. The best days were when they were making Junior Mints (which are one of my top favorite candies). The most disturbing part is when you see the corn syrup truck pull up and pump corn syrup in through an external pipe.
posted by uncleozzy at 8:53 AM on November 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
And yeah, from 2001-2004 or so I walked past the Tootsie Roll factory on the way to work every day. The best days were when they were making Junior Mints (which are one of my top favorite candies). The most disturbing part is when you see the corn syrup truck pull up and pump corn syrup in through an external pipe.
posted by uncleozzy at 8:53 AM on November 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
Count me in the pile of Tootsie Roll lovers. My sister sent me a bag of Midgees for my birthday yesterday and I've been in heaven since.
Cherry is my preferred Tootsie Pop flavor. And the owl is wrong. It takes WAY more than 3 licks. Way more.
posted by yoga at 9:28 AM on November 6, 2014
Cherry is my preferred Tootsie Pop flavor. And the owl is wrong. It takes WAY more than 3 licks. Way more.
posted by yoga at 9:28 AM on November 6, 2014
Tootsie Rolls are one step up from Necco Wafers, which is to say, only to be used in times of desperation.
That may be true now, but back in the day, Necco wafers worked as a substitute for quarters in IL's automated toll booth baskets. A entirely different sort of desperation.
posted by rtimmel at 9:32 AM on November 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
That may be true now, but back in the day, Necco wafers worked as a substitute for quarters in IL's automated toll booth baskets. A entirely different sort of desperation.
posted by rtimmel at 9:32 AM on November 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
Tootsie Rolls were pretty far down the Halloween Candy Desirability Scale when I was a kid. The bottom of the list would have gone something like this:
97. Tootsie Rolls
98. Those shitty toffee things with Halloween-themed wrappers
99. A rock
100. Thrills
posted by The Card Cheat at 9:36 AM on November 6, 2014
97. Tootsie Rolls
98. Those shitty toffee things with Halloween-themed wrappers
99. A rock
100. Thrills
posted by The Card Cheat at 9:36 AM on November 6, 2014
I still love Mary Jane's.
You and these so-called "candies" and the company that continues to make them are an abomination.
posted by Sophie1 at 9:37 AM on November 6, 2014
You and these so-called "candies" and the company that continues to make them are an abomination.
posted by Sophie1 at 9:37 AM on November 6, 2014
Oh, yeah, I love Mary Janes and Bit-O-Honey, too. Basically all of the terrible candies except Circus Peanuts, which are an outright abomination.
posted by uncleozzy at 9:40 AM on November 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by uncleozzy at 9:40 AM on November 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
Shit I might have to flame out after watching this tootsie roll hate fest. What is wrong with you people? JFC, WTF. Perhaps you just had stale ones or have been brainwashed by Tootsie Roll Hate Stalin (a cousin of the more famous Stalin).
Especially traumatic after watching so many people fawning over largely craptastic "fruity candy" in a Halloween related thread.
posted by aydeejones at 9:53 AM on November 6, 2014
Especially traumatic after watching so many people fawning over largely craptastic "fruity candy" in a Halloween related thread.
posted by aydeejones at 9:53 AM on November 6, 2014
Haters gonna hate, but just last weekend I ate my first Tootsie Rolls in probably 15 years (dish of free Halloween candy at a local antiques store) and they were FUCKING AWESOME.
Also, their importance in granting scatological verisimilitude to the ever-festive kitty litter cake is not to be underestimated.
posted by Dr. Wu at 10:02 AM on November 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
Also, their importance in granting scatological verisimilitude to the ever-festive kitty litter cake is not to be underestimated.
posted by Dr. Wu at 10:02 AM on November 6, 2014 [2 favorites]
I'm not sure where all of this tootsie roll hate comes from. Especially since all of your comments seem to imply that candy corn is not the worst thing to get trick-or-treating.
posted by ckape at 10:03 AM on November 6, 2014
posted by ckape at 10:03 AM on November 6, 2014
100. Thrills
Yes, Thrills! That is the name of that weird soap-flavoured gum! There used to be a store in Guelph that sold Thrills in bulk. Those were happy days indeed.
posted by fimbulvetr at 10:12 AM on November 6, 2014
Yes, Thrills! That is the name of that weird soap-flavoured gum! There used to be a store in Guelph that sold Thrills in bulk. Those were happy days indeed.
posted by fimbulvetr at 10:12 AM on November 6, 2014
I think you're a time-traveler, fimbulbvetr.
I will neither confirm nor deny this completely spurious claim.
posted by fimbulvetr at 10:14 AM on November 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
I will neither confirm nor deny this completely spurious claim.
posted by fimbulvetr at 10:14 AM on November 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
that weird soap-flavoured gum
Somebody's making cilantro-flavored gum?!?!
posted by asterix at 10:18 AM on November 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
Somebody's making cilantro-flavored gum?!?!
posted by asterix at 10:18 AM on November 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
Nope, rosewater! (I had to google it — seems like it's Canadian.)
It is well known for its purple colour and its distinctive floral rosewater flavour. Comparisons of its flavour to soap are so prevalent that recent packaging states "it still tastes like soap!"posted by benito.strauss at 10:21 AM on November 6, 2014
You can still get Thrills at Bulk Barn in Ontario.
My brother actually liked Thrills when we were kids, so trying to get anything in return when we traded Halloween candy was an early lesson in leverage and economics. He knew I was just going to throw them in the trash if I didn't trade them, so the exchange rate ran at roughly 100 packs of Thrills = one piece of candy I barely wanted.
posted by The Card Cheat at 12:39 PM on November 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
My brother actually liked Thrills when we were kids, so trying to get anything in return when we traded Halloween candy was an early lesson in leverage and economics. He knew I was just going to throw them in the trash if I didn't trade them, so the exchange rate ran at roughly 100 packs of Thrills = one piece of candy I barely wanted.
posted by The Card Cheat at 12:39 PM on November 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
I LOVE THE BULK BARN.
I got gummy hockey players and a tiny dinosaur cookie cutter last time I went.
posted by maryr at 12:45 PM on November 6, 2014
I got gummy hockey players and a tiny dinosaur cookie cutter last time I went.
posted by maryr at 12:45 PM on November 6, 2014
I can imagine Tootsie Rolls being crap to people who like chocolate, but as someone who grew up not liking chocolate, they were just interesting enough a candy to not throw out on Halloween. I like them like I like Taco Bell. They aren't authentic anything but Tootsieness.
posted by rhizome at 12:59 PM on November 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by rhizome at 12:59 PM on November 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
Man, screw the hate. I love Tootsie Rolls, and Necco Wafers. If you don't like them, you are a bad person who should feel bad.
(Of course, my favorite candy by far is those weird fake raspberries that are like a gumdrop covered in candy spheres, so what do I know? Also, circus peanuts can only have sprung from the devil's anus, and anyone who says otherwise should not be trusted)
posted by tocts at 1:28 PM on November 6, 2014
(Of course, my favorite candy by far is those weird fake raspberries that are like a gumdrop covered in candy spheres, so what do I know? Also, circus peanuts can only have sprung from the devil's anus, and anyone who says otherwise should not be trusted)
posted by tocts at 1:28 PM on November 6, 2014
halloween kisses! that's what those were called. they were either orange or purpley brown, had halloween themed wrapper, and the rumour was that they were made from all the candy that got spilled on the candy factory floor. I loved them anyway.
posted by 5_13_23_42_69_666 at 1:32 PM on November 6, 2014
posted by 5_13_23_42_69_666 at 1:32 PM on November 6, 2014
tocts those are Trolli raspberries/blackberries and I'm pretty sure they changed the recipe some years ago to make them blander. Either that or my candy palate is increasingly jaded and maybe the last time I thought they were of sufficient pungency was before Cry Babies and Warheads were invented. Either way, every time I impulse buy them I experience amnesiac disapointment.
posted by rhizome at 2:05 PM on November 6, 2014
posted by rhizome at 2:05 PM on November 6, 2014
Yeah, yeah, yeah, Tootsie Rolls, whatever: they'll do if there's no other candy around I suppose. And maybe a week ago that might have been the case in our house.
BUT I DISCOVERED SOMETHING LAST WEEK. I was listening to a very old episode of "Jordan, Jesse, Go!" and they had some comedy team on as guests, discussing their Top 5 Weird Candy Bars (or something like that). And one of the items on the list was on the list not because it was particularly weird, but because it was a still-in-production British version of what used to be called a Marathon bar in the US. They're called Curly-Wurly bars!
I immediately clicked over to Amazon and ordered a box of 20 of them. And they are smaller than the Marathon bars I remember, but still awesome.
I guess what I'm saying is, if you want something chocolately-caramelly-chewy, order some Curly-Wurlies. Not Tootsie Rolls.
posted by Ipsifendus at 2:52 PM on November 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
BUT I DISCOVERED SOMETHING LAST WEEK. I was listening to a very old episode of "Jordan, Jesse, Go!" and they had some comedy team on as guests, discussing their Top 5 Weird Candy Bars (or something like that). And one of the items on the list was on the list not because it was particularly weird, but because it was a still-in-production British version of what used to be called a Marathon bar in the US. They're called Curly-Wurly bars!
I immediately clicked over to Amazon and ordered a box of 20 of them. And they are smaller than the Marathon bars I remember, but still awesome.
I guess what I'm saying is, if you want something chocolately-caramelly-chewy, order some Curly-Wurlies. Not Tootsie Rolls.
posted by Ipsifendus at 2:52 PM on November 6, 2014 [1 favorite]
The Curly-Wurly/Marathon bar is indeed one of the all-time greats, smaller though the modern version may be. I always figured it's because the greater the percentage of chocolate by weight, the higher the margins since "chocolate" can be so varied. You're about to get into Reggie Bar territory, though.
posted by rhizome at 7:54 PM on November 6, 2014
posted by rhizome at 7:54 PM on November 6, 2014
So first, to state my bonafides for liking disgusting candy, I tend to eat about a pound of candy corn every Halloween. I don't hand it out, I just eat the stuff in three or four sittings. It's fantastic.
Tootsie rolls that are flavored with some kind of fruit flavor are like inferior shell-less Skittles. They'll do, but they aren't great. The brown ones, well, I could never tell what flavor they were supposed to be. It's not chocolate. If it was chocolate, they would never have made chocolate covered tootsie rolls. They're horrible things. But they are better than Now and Laters, which I am convinced were designed by dentists to drum up more business by extracting fillings. Those were always lower down on my list than tootsie rolls. But not by much.
posted by Hactar at 11:06 PM on November 8, 2014
Tootsie rolls that are flavored with some kind of fruit flavor are like inferior shell-less Skittles. They'll do, but they aren't great. The brown ones, well, I could never tell what flavor they were supposed to be. It's not chocolate. If it was chocolate, they would never have made chocolate covered tootsie rolls. They're horrible things. But they are better than Now and Laters, which I am convinced were designed by dentists to drum up more business by extracting fillings. Those were always lower down on my list than tootsie rolls. But not by much.
posted by Hactar at 11:06 PM on November 8, 2014
Coatlicue: "My college boyfriend once ate so many Tootsie Rolls, that his nose started running violently, and the snot was tinged Tootsie Roll brown. That certainly didn't improve my opinion of Tootsie Rolls."
Related: Once in college, I ate a whole package of Twizzlers before going out to drink heavily.
I had Twizzler bits coming out when I blew my nose for two days.
posted by Chrysostom at 8:01 AM on November 13, 2014
Related: Once in college, I ate a whole package of Twizzlers before going out to drink heavily.
I had Twizzler bits coming out when I blew my nose for two days.
posted by Chrysostom at 8:01 AM on November 13, 2014
Thanks The Card Cheat! I went down to Bulk Barn and picked up some Thrills. I gave some to my kids (5 and 7) and they both loved the stuff. They keep asking if I have any more of that "soap gum."
My wife says it must be genetic.
posted by fimbulvetr at 10:30 AM on November 14, 2014
My wife says it must be genetic.
posted by fimbulvetr at 10:30 AM on November 14, 2014
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posted by jepler at 6:36 PM on November 5, 2014 [4 favorites]