part-time Einstein
April 2, 2015 6:44 AM Subscribe
In 1940, Albert Einstein was rejected by the US Army for wartime work. He didn't help the war effort until 1943, when he worked part-time for the Navy. The proof? his timecards.
from Mefi's Own JF Ptak, part of The History of Blank and Empty Things, including POW postcards, a form that becomes SECRET (when filled in) and asks where do left-out details go?
Einstein was recruited to the Navy's Bureau of Ordinance by Stephen Brunauer, who wrote about his work with Einstein in the Navy.
from Mefi's Own JF Ptak, part of The History of Blank and Empty Things, including POW postcards, a form that becomes SECRET (when filled in) and asks where do left-out details go?
Einstein was recruited to the Navy's Bureau of Ordinance by Stephen Brunauer, who wrote about his work with Einstein in the Navy.
The FBI thought him not trustworthy
Oh, those scamps. They had a big dirt file On him, probably because he had communist looking hair or said hello to a black person once.
posted by Artw at 7:00 AM on April 2, 2015 [9 favorites]
Oh, those scamps. They had a big dirt file On him, probably because he had communist looking hair or said hello to a black person once.
posted by Artw at 7:00 AM on April 2, 2015 [9 favorites]
Well that's disappointing, the biography is paywalled.
posted by charlie don't surf at 7:23 AM on April 2, 2015
posted by charlie don't surf at 7:23 AM on April 2, 2015
[Insert snappy *time is relative* joke here]
I don't have a snappy Einstein joke, but I do have a snappy Werner Heisenberg joke, and so I'm going to tell it and you can't stop me.
So it seems that during the '50s, Heisenberg went through a pretty serious midlife crisis. He'd done his best work in his 20s, won the Nobel at 31, and now here he was 20 years later wondering if the rest of his life was going to be all downhill from there... basically it hit him pretty hard. So at one point he bought himself a little red sports car, a convertible, and started going out for a spin in it every day after lunch and driving way too fast. He developed kind of a local reputation and people learned to look out for him and keep out of his way.
Everyone knew it would happen eventually, and sure enough one day he got pulled over. This was on a pretty straight stretch of highway, so he'd really been hauling. And Heisenberg is pissed. The cop is shaking his head as he comes up to the side of the car. And the cop checks Heisenberg's license and registration, and then he says "Sir, do you know I clocked you doing 92 miles per hour back there?"
And Heisenberg throws up his hands and goes, "Great. Thanks a lot. Now I'm lost."
Thank you, I'm here all week.
posted by Naberius at 7:28 AM on April 2, 2015 [32 favorites]
I don't have a snappy Einstein joke, but I do have a snappy Werner Heisenberg joke, and so I'm going to tell it and you can't stop me.
So it seems that during the '50s, Heisenberg went through a pretty serious midlife crisis. He'd done his best work in his 20s, won the Nobel at 31, and now here he was 20 years later wondering if the rest of his life was going to be all downhill from there... basically it hit him pretty hard. So at one point he bought himself a little red sports car, a convertible, and started going out for a spin in it every day after lunch and driving way too fast. He developed kind of a local reputation and people learned to look out for him and keep out of his way.
Everyone knew it would happen eventually, and sure enough one day he got pulled over. This was on a pretty straight stretch of highway, so he'd really been hauling. And Heisenberg is pissed. The cop is shaking his head as he comes up to the side of the car. And the cop checks Heisenberg's license and registration, and then he says "Sir, do you know I clocked you doing 92 miles per hour back there?"
And Heisenberg throws up his hands and goes, "Great. Thanks a lot. Now I'm lost."
Thank you, I'm here all week.
posted by Naberius at 7:28 AM on April 2, 2015 [32 favorites]
I'm here all week.
Not quite. Let's just say, in the vicinity.
posted by Gyan at 7:41 AM on April 2, 2015 [22 favorites]
Not quite. Let's just say, in the vicinity.
posted by Gyan at 7:41 AM on April 2, 2015 [22 favorites]
Oh, those scamps.
Considering Hoover's approach to things, I am sure that being Jewish made Einstein suspect. For a certain type of person, you apparently couldn't separate "Jewish" and "Bolshevik" in their heads....
posted by GenjiandProust at 7:44 AM on April 2, 2015 [1 favorite]
Considering Hoover's approach to things, I am sure that being Jewish made Einstein suspect. For a certain type of person, you apparently couldn't separate "Jewish" and "Bolshevik" in their heads....
posted by GenjiandProust at 7:44 AM on April 2, 2015 [1 favorite]
Sure, you know how long you'll be here, but who knows how much energy you'll have?
posted by OnceUponATime at 8:49 AM on April 2, 2015 [5 favorites]
posted by OnceUponATime at 8:49 AM on April 2, 2015 [5 favorites]
The FBI thought him not trustworthy
The FBI seems to be suspicious of anyone intelligent.
This is a neat little glimpse into history. Thanks!
posted by saulgoodman at 9:17 AM on April 2, 2015
The FBI seems to be suspicious of anyone intelligent.
This is a neat little glimpse into history. Thanks!
posted by saulgoodman at 9:17 AM on April 2, 2015
My favorite Heisenberg joke is really something from Star Trek. One of the perennial questions about the transporters on the show was, how do they work with the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle? Well, one of the show's staffers came up with the Heisenberg compensator and stuck it in the show's tech references. Time magazine asked Michael Okuda how they worked, and he said, "They work just fine, thank you."
posted by Halloween Jack at 9:29 AM on April 2, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by Halloween Jack at 9:29 AM on April 2, 2015 [3 favorites]
Sure, you know how long you'll be here, but who knows how much energy you'll have?
This joke seems to be losing its momentum.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 9:37 AM on April 2, 2015 [4 favorites]
This joke seems to be losing its momentum.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 9:37 AM on April 2, 2015 [4 favorites]
Considering Hoover's approach to things, I am sure that being Jewish made Einstein suspect. For a certain type of person, you apparently couldn't separate "Jewish" and "Bolshevik" in their heads....
Yet, Oppenheimer was made head of the bomb effort. You'd be suspicious if a rich New York left-leaning jew didn't have any evidence of being a communist during that period.
The difference is that Oppenheimer came from money, which meant he had people to speak for him, possibly Roosevelts even... and that Einstein had put his name is public causes, particularly civil rights causes. Because, the purpose of surveillance is never about foiling dastardly blocks but about political control. And, keeping black people down was always Hoover's numero uno mission.
posted by ennui.bz at 9:58 AM on April 2, 2015 [1 favorite]
Yet, Oppenheimer was made head of the bomb effort. You'd be suspicious if a rich New York left-leaning jew didn't have any evidence of being a communist during that period.
The difference is that Oppenheimer came from money, which meant he had people to speak for him, possibly Roosevelts even... and that Einstein had put his name is public causes, particularly civil rights causes. Because, the purpose of surveillance is never about foiling dastardly blocks but about political control. And, keeping black people down was always Hoover's numero uno mission.
posted by ennui.bz at 9:58 AM on April 2, 2015 [1 favorite]
The FBI really were totally shitbags till the late 80s/early 90s when they shifted their focus to fighting serial killers and the supernatural.
posted by Artw at 10:20 AM on April 2, 2015 [5 favorites]
posted by Artw at 10:20 AM on April 2, 2015 [5 favorites]
We don't want snappy jokes, dammit, we want puns!
Why was his hair white but his mustache black? Did the FBI psychoanalyze that?
posted by discopolo at 10:57 AM on April 2, 2015
Why was his hair white but his mustache black? Did the FBI psychoanalyze that?
posted by discopolo at 10:57 AM on April 2, 2015
Actually, the FBI and the army were all pretty suspicious of Oppenheimer as well. In fact, after the war he was called before the House Unamerican Activities Commitee and blacklisted If I remeber from his biography.
posted by herda05 at 1:20 PM on April 2, 2015
posted by herda05 at 1:20 PM on April 2, 2015
The FBI was hardly being paranoid.
They knew very well that the Manhattan Project and its immediate successors were actively targeted by Communist spies acting through the instrumentality of American employees. That spying was actually successful in the end, as it happened.
The fact that Einstein was kept out of the Manhattan Project, and yet it thoroughly achieved its objectives, is a nice lesson in the principle that there really is no such thing as an essential person.
posted by MattD at 2:53 PM on April 2, 2015 [1 favorite]
They knew very well that the Manhattan Project and its immediate successors were actively targeted by Communist spies acting through the instrumentality of American employees. That spying was actually successful in the end, as it happened.
The fact that Einstein was kept out of the Manhattan Project, and yet it thoroughly achieved its objectives, is a nice lesson in the principle that there really is no such thing as an essential person.
posted by MattD at 2:53 PM on April 2, 2015 [1 favorite]
The fact that Einstein was kept out of the Manhattan Project, and yet it thoroughly achieved its objectives, is a nice lesson in the principle that there really is no such thing as an essential person.
I dunno, man… Led Zeppelin called it quits when Bonzo died. That's some knowing that there is such a thing as an essential person.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 8:41 AM on April 3, 2015
I dunno, man… Led Zeppelin called it quits when Bonzo died. That's some knowing that there is such a thing as an essential person.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 8:41 AM on April 3, 2015
In the Led Zep case he was instrumental, you could say.
posted by Rumple at 11:49 AM on April 3, 2015
posted by Rumple at 11:49 AM on April 3, 2015
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[Insert snappy *time is relative* joke here]
posted by flapjax at midnite at 6:53 AM on April 2, 2015 [9 favorites]