Tomato sauce! Cheese! Canned Fruit Cocktail! Chocolate!
September 3, 2015 2:32 PM Subscribe
Tomato sauce! Cheese! Canned Fruit Cocktail! Chocolate!
In Sweden, its culinary landscape has created - out of necessity and osmosis - a national blanket of works of art that reach such a deeply fucked surreal and counter-intuitive culinary splendor that the most absurd creations by high-concept experimental artists, experimental chefs or artist-chef-experimental-weirdos wither in comparison. HuffPoUK's Johan Kugelberg on Swedish Pizza.
The rudimentary basic here is a wide variety of combinations of toppings that are given mysterious or enticing monikers on the menu of the pizzeria. These names correspond in a mannerism-fashion to Italy and exoticism not unlike how a tiki-bar relates to the lives of Micronesian natives. These pizzas don't really have that much to do with stuff like the California Pizza Kitchen, or those grim UK/Oz gastro-pub pizzas, except for shared notions o the picturesque, Swedish pizza is its own thing, based on convoluted notions of exotica and on the base cravings that can attach themselves to base commerce.
In Sweden, its culinary landscape has created - out of necessity and osmosis - a national blanket of works of art that reach such a deeply fucked surreal and counter-intuitive culinary splendor that the most absurd creations by high-concept experimental artists, experimental chefs or artist-chef-experimental-weirdos wither in comparison. HuffPoUK's Johan Kugelberg on Swedish Pizza.
The rudimentary basic here is a wide variety of combinations of toppings that are given mysterious or enticing monikers on the menu of the pizzeria. These names correspond in a mannerism-fashion to Italy and exoticism not unlike how a tiki-bar relates to the lives of Micronesian natives. These pizzas don't really have that much to do with stuff like the California Pizza Kitchen, or those grim UK/Oz gastro-pub pizzas, except for shared notions o the picturesque, Swedish pizza is its own thing, based on convoluted notions of exotica and on the base cravings that can attach themselves to base commerce.
No one take this guy to Pizza My Heart:
Green Apple Slices!
Pepperoni!
Sausage!
Bacon!
Green Onions!
Gorgonzola!
Garlic!
No Red Sauce!
(The Watsonville Apple available at PMH in malls everywhere)
posted by GuyZero at 2:46 PM on September 3, 2015
Green Apple Slices!
Pepperoni!
Sausage!
Bacon!
Green Onions!
Gorgonzola!
Garlic!
No Red Sauce!
(The Watsonville Apple available at PMH in malls everywhere)
posted by GuyZero at 2:46 PM on September 3, 2015
Not sure about fruit cocktail and chocolate outside of a "dessert pizza", but in the right configurations a lot of these could be quite nice and I could imagine seeing on the occasional menu in Canada. Japan had options like mayo, seaweed, squid, octopus, raw fish, roe, and corn on pizza and I was down for that. Corn and mayo though -- corn and mayo was everywhere, actually, it almost seemed like any Western-style food was seen as a possible means to distribute corn and mayo.
posted by Hoopo at 2:48 PM on September 3, 2015
posted by Hoopo at 2:48 PM on September 3, 2015
Banana!? No. Pineapple on a pizza is bad enough - but Banana!?!? But what do you expect from a country that eats salty liquorish and Surströmming
posted by helmutdog at 2:49 PM on September 3, 2015
posted by helmutdog at 2:49 PM on September 3, 2015
OMG A BOX REFERENCE
posted by davelog at 2:52 PM on September 3, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by davelog at 2:52 PM on September 3, 2015 [2 favorites]
I knew someone would someday beat out the worst pizza I ever had (tomato paste + Velveeta + broccoli), but I never guessed it'd be fruit cocktail & chocolate.
posted by BrotherCaine at 2:55 PM on September 3, 2015
posted by BrotherCaine at 2:55 PM on September 3, 2015
There is also Pizza salad - a bland coleslaw as un-Italian as a full term prime minister which legend has it pizza shop owners were encouraged to buy from one source controlled by Yugoslav mafia types. It's the only explanation which makes sense as it is served in EVERY pizza shop.
posted by three blind mice at 3:22 PM on September 3, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by three blind mice at 3:22 PM on September 3, 2015 [2 favorites]
There's actually a reason for the large amount of banana/curry/peanut combos. These are (but a few) of the elements in the beloved dish Flygande (flying) Jacob . Go read the ingredients list. I will wait. Seventies comfort food at it's finest. It feels like it was invented by someone who forgot he had the kids this weekend and is severely hungover.
Pizzarias are traditionally run by the Turks here. On a similar note fish-n-chip shops in Ireland are traditionally Italian. Pizza salad is a wonderous thing, vinegary and crunchy and ideally with warm bits of pizza bread while you wait.
posted by Iteki at 3:34 PM on September 3, 2015 [5 favorites]
Pizzarias are traditionally run by the Turks here. On a similar note fish-n-chip shops in Ireland are traditionally Italian. Pizza salad is a wonderous thing, vinegary and crunchy and ideally with warm bits of pizza bread while you wait.
posted by Iteki at 3:34 PM on September 3, 2015 [5 favorites]
Gummi Bears! Herring! Mayonnaise!
posted by indubitable at 3:38 PM on September 3, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by indubitable at 3:38 PM on September 3, 2015 [1 favorite]
I knew someone would someday beat out the worst pizza I ever had (tomato paste + Velveeta + broccoli)
oh you visited st louis too huh?
posted by indubitable at 3:40 PM on September 3, 2015 [6 favorites]
oh you visited st louis too huh?
posted by indubitable at 3:40 PM on September 3, 2015 [6 favorites]
I have been to Sweden four times and never tried Swedish pizza. I'd love to, but my (Swedish) wife doesn't like it. Same story for lutfisk and surströmming.
posted by pravit at 3:43 PM on September 3, 2015
posted by pravit at 3:43 PM on September 3, 2015
A Swedish person I knew introduced me to Swedish pizza, as a sort of party concept, where each person made their own pizza from the available ingredients, and I realized that the trick is to switch off 'pizza mode.' Just abandon your perceptions of what a pizza should be and eat the thing you made. I think I ended up with sauce, cheese, bananas, onion, tuna, and curry powder, and it was very good.
This is actually a trick I use on all kinds of food categories. Not every pizza has to be your platonic ideal of a pizza. Same goes with burritos, tacos, chili, and pretty much every other divisive food category.
Disclaimer: My favorite non-NY style pizza is pineapple and jalapeno, and yes, I will be happy to fight you.
posted by ernielundquist at 3:53 PM on September 3, 2015 [4 favorites]
This is actually a trick I use on all kinds of food categories. Not every pizza has to be your platonic ideal of a pizza. Same goes with burritos, tacos, chili, and pretty much every other divisive food category.
Disclaimer: My favorite non-NY style pizza is pineapple and jalapeno, and yes, I will be happy to fight you.
posted by ernielundquist at 3:53 PM on September 3, 2015 [4 favorites]
Don't knock banana pizza until you've tried it. The kind I had was just an ordinary cheese pizza with banana slices as a topping, and it works surprisingly well. The banana caramelizes a bit in the oven.
posted by wanderingmind at 3:57 PM on September 3, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by wanderingmind at 3:57 PM on September 3, 2015 [2 favorites]
My kid, who still lives in Stockholm, introduced me to adding bananas to pizza. On her homemade pizza. It was totally tasty, no kidding.
posted by Bella Donna at 4:48 PM on September 3, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by Bella Donna at 4:48 PM on September 3, 2015 [1 favorite]
Ham, Spam, Clam, and Jam! (The ultimate!)
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 5:15 PM on September 3, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 5:15 PM on September 3, 2015 [3 favorites]
Ham, Spam, Clam, and Jam! (The ultimate!)
posted by Chocolate Pickle
ಠ_ಠ
posted by Room 641-A at 5:56 PM on September 3, 2015 [6 favorites]
posted by Chocolate Pickle
ಠ_ಠ
posted by Room 641-A at 5:56 PM on September 3, 2015 [6 favorites]
None of these combos make me frown as much as the ones featured on Mr. Pizza's menu. And I'm someone who seconds the idea that pineapple and jalapeno is pretty much the perfect pizza.
posted by queensissy at 5:57 PM on September 3, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by queensissy at 5:57 PM on September 3, 2015 [2 favorites]
In rural Sweden, you drive for half an hour to get this. It's a special treat. And there are no alternatives (well, the same place may sell kebabs and burgers, but better not).
You have to be less than or more than a normal developed country to engineer this.
posted by Devonian at 7:56 PM on September 3, 2015 [1 favorite]
You have to be less than or more than a normal developed country to engineer this.
posted by Devonian at 7:56 PM on September 3, 2015 [1 favorite]
Well that's gonna happen when somebody else operates your hands.
posted by BiggerJ at 9:32 PM on September 3, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by BiggerJ at 9:32 PM on September 3, 2015 [2 favorites]
Tomato sauce!
Cheese!
Clementines!
Pineapple!
Mushrooms!
Bolognese Sauce!
this pizza is a mess
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 10:13 PM on September 3, 2015
Cheese!
Clementines!
Pineapple!
Mushrooms!
Bolognese Sauce!
this pizza is a mess
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 10:13 PM on September 3, 2015
There's actually a reason for the large amount of banana/curry/peanut combos. These are (but a few) of the elements in the beloved dish Flygande (flying) Jacob.
Which is, most likely, a riff on the Swiss national dish "Riz Casimir" (rice and chicken in a mild curry sauce, typically topped with pineapple, banana, and cashew nuts or similar) which was first served by the Mövenpick restaurants in 1952.
posted by effbot at 11:32 PM on September 3, 2015 [1 favorite]
Which is, most likely, a riff on the Swiss national dish "Riz Casimir" (rice and chicken in a mild curry sauce, typically topped with pineapple, banana, and cashew nuts or similar) which was first served by the Mövenpick restaurants in 1952.
posted by effbot at 11:32 PM on September 3, 2015 [1 favorite]
That was a delightful article in celebration of something that I’m altogether sure ought really be celebrated - thanks, Room 641-A. I’m reminded of that eerily foggy November day on Öland that I made the mistake of ordering the kebabpizza from a place in Färjestaden, a mistake I then compounded by eating it; and three blind mice’s comment took me back to my initial bafflement on being presented with some plastic tubs full of pizzasallad when I first ordered a takeaway from the Cleopatra pizzeria in Karlskrona, not yet understanding its role as a obligatory and all-but-unavoidable accompaniment to Swedish pizza.
posted by misteraitch at 1:16 AM on September 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by misteraitch at 1:16 AM on September 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
The béarnaise/jalapeno combination is surprisingly tasty - nice and creamy, with a savory tang (the peppers are never more than mildly flavorful, and wouldn't know 'hot' if tossed into Mt Doom itself). And of course, the sweetness of banana or pineapple is a nice contrast to salty ham and cheese (pineapple melted cheese toasties are most definitely still a thing people make at home). The "sirloin" is never worth it, though - it might even be a good thing that all pizza places tend to be extremely stingy with these sad ribbons of shoe leather, as I'm not sure what ingesting great quantities of it would do to you.
That said, a lot of these ingredients (including the dessert pizzas) I've never seen in Sweden? French fries?
Raisins?? That's just weird. I'm sure it exists, but it's definitely not standard fare like salami and sliced tomatoes.
Really, the only place I've ever had a french fry pizza was in Japan - another country that does a great job of taking the concept of "pizza" and adapting it to local tastes. Curiously, almost every pizza I had delivered there came with a small sachet of Tabasco - surprisingly tasty with almost all toppings! And I still miss some of my favorite Japanese combos. Mmmm, meat-mayo.
posted by harujion at 1:31 AM on September 4, 2015
That said, a lot of these ingredients (including the dessert pizzas) I've never seen in Sweden? French fries?
Raisins?? That's just weird. I'm sure it exists, but it's definitely not standard fare like salami and sliced tomatoes.
Really, the only place I've ever had a french fry pizza was in Japan - another country that does a great job of taking the concept of "pizza" and adapting it to local tastes. Curiously, almost every pizza I had delivered there came with a small sachet of Tabasco - surprisingly tasty with almost all toppings! And I still miss some of my favorite Japanese combos. Mmmm, meat-mayo.
posted by harujion at 1:31 AM on September 4, 2015
So I'm guessing this is where the Watson recipe program ended up?
posted by Segundus at 1:34 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by Segundus at 1:34 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
French fries? Raisins?? That's just weird.
Fries on pizza is the latest trend in Italy, or so I'm told.
posted by effbot at 3:11 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
Fries on pizza is the latest trend in Italy, or so I'm told.
posted by effbot at 3:11 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
I like a food challenge... so.. chocolate on pizza...how about this.
Pizza, with a tomato sauce base, except the tomato sauce is cooked with a dash of mollasses to darken it and something umami-ish, like maybe a worcester sauce type ingredient.
Add some cheese... maybe a lightly wood smoked mozzarella.
On that you get some chicken, marinated in a chilli sauce. Red chillies, it's sharp and fresh. That chicken is flame grilled. Maybe you add some green peppers, but I'm not sure about that.
THEN, grate over the top a dark chocolate.
posted by Just this guy, y'know at 4:03 AM on September 4, 2015
Pizza, with a tomato sauce base, except the tomato sauce is cooked with a dash of mollasses to darken it and something umami-ish, like maybe a worcester sauce type ingredient.
Add some cheese... maybe a lightly wood smoked mozzarella.
On that you get some chicken, marinated in a chilli sauce. Red chillies, it's sharp and fresh. That chicken is flame grilled. Maybe you add some green peppers, but I'm not sure about that.
THEN, grate over the top a dark chocolate.
posted by Just this guy, y'know at 4:03 AM on September 4, 2015
As a yearly visitor to Sweden, I am super excited that they appear to love the same toppings I do on Pizza. Ham and Mushroom (skinka and svamp) is, without fail, in the top of the menu listings at almost every Pizza place in Sweden. Clearly after my heart they are.
Also, a friend and fellow Mefite once described Swedish pizza to me "as if it was made by someone who had been given a really good description of what pizza is without ever having seen one themselves."
posted by Twain Device at 4:19 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
Also, a friend and fellow Mefite once described Swedish pizza to me "as if it was made by someone who had been given a really good description of what pizza is without ever having seen one themselves."
posted by Twain Device at 4:19 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
> Fries on pizza is the latest trend in Italy, or so I'm told.
French fries are apparently the newest thing on an "Italian" pizza from an American chain, in Germany.
What a time to be alive!
posted by kcds at 4:38 AM on September 4, 2015
French fries are apparently the newest thing on an "Italian" pizza from an American chain, in Germany.
What a time to be alive!
posted by kcds at 4:38 AM on September 4, 2015
I don't particularly like cooked mushrooms, but pairing them with pineapple is a good way to get me to barf on your 'pizza'. Without ever tasting it.
posted by Splunge at 7:00 AM on September 4, 2015
posted by Splunge at 7:00 AM on September 4, 2015
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