Take Better Selfies
September 4, 2015 7:25 AM Subscribe
Also, take more of them. But better.
Anand Prasad offers a guide to selfies for men, and more importantly: why we should take them.
Anand Prasad offers a guide to selfies for men, and more importantly: why we should take them.
Maybe you haven’t seen it, but something extraordinary is growing on social media: a culture of unconditional self-acceptance and mutual reinforcement. It was never planned by the people who made Twitter or Instagram, never designed as a product feature, but it’s happening, and it’s empowering and healing people every day. Selfies are a huge part of the process, each one a focal point for loving ourselves or others.Now if you'll excuse me, I'm having a good hair day and have a date with Instagram.
I understand that this is a joke, but I don't understand why it's funny or why anyone ever needs to take a selfie ever.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 7:28 AM on September 4, 2015 [8 favorites]
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 7:28 AM on September 4, 2015 [8 favorites]
(Also, I forgot to give a hat tip to Deb Chachra for sharing this on Twitter.)
posted by SansPoint at 7:30 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by SansPoint at 7:30 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
Is it a joke? if it's a joke, the irony's over my head.
posted by Fraxas at 7:33 AM on September 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by Fraxas at 7:33 AM on September 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
(And keep throwing that magnum, Anand!)
posted by Annika Cicada at 7:33 AM on September 4, 2015
posted by Annika Cicada at 7:33 AM on September 4, 2015
For me, selfies were a lot more fun back before they were called selfies and because the camera used film you not only didn't know whether everyone's head was going go be cut off half way but you didn't get to see the results for days or sometimes even months,
posted by slkinsey at 7:34 AM on September 4, 2015 [5 favorites]
posted by slkinsey at 7:34 AM on September 4, 2015 [5 favorites]
Lost it at "Bathroom mirror selfies where you’ve got one foot on the edge of the sink are excellent."
Selfies are a fantastic means of self-expression, self-esteem and humor and fun!
posted by griphus at 7:35 AM on September 4, 2015 [6 favorites]
Selfies are a fantastic means of self-expression, self-esteem and humor and fun!
posted by griphus at 7:35 AM on September 4, 2015 [6 favorites]
griphus I miss #dudetime. MeFi favorite Jess Zimmerman turned me on to it, and lo, it was wonderful.
posted by SansPoint at 7:38 AM on September 4, 2015
posted by SansPoint at 7:38 AM on September 4, 2015
Every statement this man has composed is completely orthogonally 100% wrong. Discuss. Also for full context please state your full demographic information to reveal your likely experience and biases.
>RW:A42:GM:SC:RM:EB:PWCP:LNEUS<
posted by BlackPebble at 7:40 AM on September 4, 2015
>RW:A42:GM:SC:RM:EB:PWCP:LNEUS<
posted by BlackPebble at 7:40 AM on September 4, 2015
I wish I could find it again, but someone pointed out that selfies are a way for POCs to see themselves in a visual landscape that often ignores them, especially WOC.
Junot Diaz says something similar here.
So I'm here for this.
posted by Lemmy Caution at 7:41 AM on September 4, 2015 [23 favorites]
Junot Diaz says something similar here.
So I'm here for this.
posted by Lemmy Caution at 7:41 AM on September 4, 2015 [23 favorites]
Maybe you haven’t seen it, but something extraordinary is growing on social media: a culture of unconditional self-acceptance and mutual reinforcement. It was never planned by the people who made Twitter or Instagram, never designed as a product feature, but it’s happening, and it’s empowering and healing people every day. Selfies are a huge part of the process, each one a focal point for loving ourselves or others.This is most definitely not a joke.
Men can’t show vulnerability, can barely even show love, except in a small number of culturally-mandated forms. And so we can’t call ourselves beautiful, or celebrate our beauty and one another’s — that would mean admitting to vulnerability, admitting to love.
We ignore the effects of unchecked masculinity on us at huge cost. It’s poisoning us quietly, from youth through adulthood, stifling us, making us both harmed and harmful. It’s on us to end this, and it starts with radical self-love. Let’s be beautiful and vulnerable together.
It might not be technically correct to categorize this as feminism, but it hits on a lot of the same notes.
posted by schmod at 7:41 AM on September 4, 2015 [40 favorites]
"didn't know whether everyone's head was going go be cut off half way"
Just follow the truck driver rule: If you can't see the camera's lens clearly then the camera's lens can't clearly see you.
posted by I-baLL at 7:41 AM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
Just follow the truck driver rule: If you can't see the camera's lens clearly then the camera's lens can't clearly see you.
posted by I-baLL at 7:41 AM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
I understand that this is a joke, but I don't understand why it's funny or why anyone ever needs to take a selfie ever.
I dunno. I'm probably the least egotistical guy you'll ever meet, and I like taking selfies. It's nice going through them and seeing how I've aged, or remembering things I was doing/experiencing at that time.
I do share them on FB, but if I'm being honest, I care less about if anyone in my network ever looks at them and more about having an easy offsite backup of them. I lost a lifetime of photos and memorabilia* in a fire when I was 24, and it was devastating.
(*including a signed polaroid of me hanging out with Dave Grohl, Krist Novacelic and Kurt Cobain, which was my favorite thing ever, forever and ever amen.)
posted by Pogo_Fuzzybutt at 7:42 AM on September 4, 2015 [5 favorites]
I dunno. I'm probably the least egotistical guy you'll ever meet, and I like taking selfies. It's nice going through them and seeing how I've aged, or remembering things I was doing/experiencing at that time.
I do share them on FB, but if I'm being honest, I care less about if anyone in my network ever looks at them and more about having an easy offsite backup of them. I lost a lifetime of photos and memorabilia* in a fire when I was 24, and it was devastating.
(*including a signed polaroid of me hanging out with Dave Grohl, Krist Novacelic and Kurt Cobain, which was my favorite thing ever, forever and ever amen.)
posted by Pogo_Fuzzybutt at 7:42 AM on September 4, 2015 [5 favorites]
If ever a thread cries out for the return of the img tag it's this one!
posted by TedW at 7:42 AM on September 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by TedW at 7:42 AM on September 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
I am all for more dude selfies. If my husband weren't so anti picture-taking, I'd encourage him more. (I am equally anti picture-taking too so it's not like I have a leg to stand on.)
posted by Kitteh at 7:46 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by Kitteh at 7:46 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
Once you get your lighting and location worked out, set your camera to take a photo every second and do stuff in front of it for ten minutes (look toward the camera, away, talk, laugh, etc.) You'll probably find a couple good shots.
posted by straight at 7:46 AM on September 4, 2015 [4 favorites]
posted by straight at 7:46 AM on September 4, 2015 [4 favorites]
Um, so feminism means I have to increase my consumption of Facebook and high-end camera phones?
In the next issue, men should buy more clothing! Capitalism = feminism.
posted by splitpeasoup at 7:51 AM on September 4, 2015 [6 favorites]
In the next issue, men should buy more clothing! Capitalism = feminism.
posted by splitpeasoup at 7:51 AM on September 4, 2015 [6 favorites]
I hate with the blinding power of a thousand supernovae pictures of myself in nearly any circumstance. Would that I didn't not have this curious genetic thing where I look like I've either just eaten a slightly less rotund version of myself or am in the midst of a particularly bad bout of constipation. Seriously, my dad and sister tend in this direction too. I might be open to taking a selfie were this not true.
posted by Emperor SnooKloze at 7:52 AM on September 4, 2015
posted by Emperor SnooKloze at 7:52 AM on September 4, 2015
Sokka shot first Here is all the explanation you need, from the originator.
TL;DR: "The basic idea behind #dudetime was to playfully flip the idea of #girltime in a way that took the creepiness of the male gaze out of it, and to provide a space for equal-opportunity objectification."
posted by SansPoint at 7:53 AM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
TL;DR: "The basic idea behind #dudetime was to playfully flip the idea of #girltime in a way that took the creepiness of the male gaze out of it, and to provide a space for equal-opportunity objectification."
posted by SansPoint at 7:53 AM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
Wait, what is/was #dudetime...?
"The basic idea behind #dudetime was to playfully flip the idea of #girltime in a way that took the creepiness of the male gaze out of it, and to provide a space for equal-opportunity objectification."
posted by griphus at 7:53 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
"The basic idea behind #dudetime was to playfully flip the idea of #girltime in a way that took the creepiness of the male gaze out of it, and to provide a space for equal-opportunity objectification."
posted by griphus at 7:53 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
Um, so feminism means I have to increase my consumption of Facebook and high-end camera phones?
In the next issue, men should buy more clothing! Capitalism = feminism..
It just means realizing that our social ills stem from a lack of preoccupation with ourselves in especially superficial ways.
posted by deathmaven at 7:54 AM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
In the next issue, men should buy more clothing! Capitalism = feminism..
It just means realizing that our social ills stem from a lack of preoccupation with ourselves in especially superficial ways.
posted by deathmaven at 7:54 AM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
I, admittedly, am a bit of an egomaniac so I fully support this. I also happen to always look nice in pictures. My wife, on the other hand, is completely unrecognizable in photographs. She becomes this ungainly, awkward creature, all teeth, knees and elbows. So I guess what I am saying is take selfies or not, as you wish.
posted by Literaryhero at 8:00 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by Literaryhero at 8:00 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
Also, stop taking pictures of your dicks.
posted by maryr at 8:00 AM on September 4, 2015 [20 favorites]
posted by maryr at 8:00 AM on September 4, 2015 [20 favorites]
"The basic idea behind #dudetime was to playfully flip the idea of #girltime in a way that took the creepiness of the male gaze out of it, and to provide a space for equal-opportunity objectification."
I'm fascinated by this explanation for its multitude of bizarre presumptions. That either #girltime is immediately intuitive enough to need no further explanation or else a genuine cultural touchstone that everyone would be expected to know about, and that the concept is meaningful enough on it's own that "flipping" it would be subversive.
posted by deathmaven at 8:00 AM on September 4, 2015 [4 favorites]
I'm fascinated by this explanation for its multitude of bizarre presumptions. That either #girltime is immediately intuitive enough to need no further explanation or else a genuine cultural touchstone that everyone would be expected to know about, and that the concept is meaningful enough on it's own that "flipping" it would be subversive.
posted by deathmaven at 8:00 AM on September 4, 2015 [4 favorites]
I found this article entirely charming!
posted by misskaz at 8:02 AM on September 4, 2015 [4 favorites]
posted by misskaz at 8:02 AM on September 4, 2015 [4 favorites]
If selfies help people overcome their own insecurities and gain some self-esteem, sure, why not. But more often than not the people I know that looooove selfies could really use some humility.
posted by numaner at 8:03 AM on September 4, 2015
posted by numaner at 8:03 AM on September 4, 2015
That either #girltime is immediately intuitive enough to need no further explanation...
Did you click on the link?
"It was based on rapper Lil B’s Twitter feature, #girltime, where girls who follow Lil B send him photos of themselves and he retweets them."
posted by griphus at 8:03 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
Did you click on the link?
"It was based on rapper Lil B’s Twitter feature, #girltime, where girls who follow Lil B send him photos of themselves and he retweets them."
posted by griphus at 8:03 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
I swear, I take the worst selfies. I don't photograph well normally and trying to do it myself is even worse with my giant head and t-rex arms. Maybe this will help.
posted by snuffleupagus at 8:04 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by snuffleupagus at 8:04 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
Most of my photos on instagram are a blend of photos of random selfies, books, coffee, & pizza that I just finished eating.
posted by Fizz at 8:08 AM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by Fizz at 8:08 AM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
^As someone who follows Fizz on Instagram, I can attest this is true.^
posted by Kitteh at 8:11 AM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by Kitteh at 8:11 AM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
I finally got a smartphone and god I am so bad at this.
On balance though I'm gonna go with "nobody should take photographs of anything, ever, thanks for listening."
posted by atoxyl at 8:13 AM on September 4, 2015
On balance though I'm gonna go with "nobody should take photographs of anything, ever, thanks for listening."
posted by atoxyl at 8:13 AM on September 4, 2015
Kitteh, those are the things I love in my life: books, coffee, pizza, and myself. So those are the things I choose to share. I like to think that I'm not annoying about the amount that I share. Glad you follow along. :)
posted by Fizz at 8:15 AM on September 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by Fizz at 8:15 AM on September 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
flood thread with selfies
I'm at the office wearing business really, really far too casual.
posted by griphus at 8:27 AM on September 4, 2015 [19 favorites]
I'm at the office wearing business really, really far too casual.
posted by griphus at 8:27 AM on September 4, 2015 [19 favorites]
RW:A42:GM:SC:RM:EB:PWCP:LNEUSOkay, I'll bite: is this a scheme that existed before this post? I think I've got the first three, but then it becomes harder.
posted by BlackPebble at 7:40 on September 4
eats: beans
principle weapon: crisp poppadoms
lives now: eastern US
If you ask me, cis men on average could do with a little less unconditional self-acceptance and mutual reinforcement and a little more paying attention to the world around them and thinking about the experiences of other people. . . but, it seems unlikely encouraging us to take more selfies will do any harm.
posted by eotvos at 8:27 AM on September 4, 2015 [5 favorites]
As someone who battles dysmorphia and depression, selfies help. I'm sobbing on my couch hating myself and I'll open my photo app and flick back through photos of when I was happy and it reminds me that hey, I'm not a total waste of space and remember that time you smiled? So yeah... I get what he's saying. They can be positive and constructive so long as you don't get lost in them, like many other things in life.
posted by msbutah at 8:31 AM on September 4, 2015 [12 favorites]
posted by msbutah at 8:31 AM on September 4, 2015 [12 favorites]
Holy cow, this thread makes me feel old.
posted by aught at 8:34 AM on September 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by aught at 8:34 AM on September 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
flood thread with selfies
See profile pic. Me and my boys, hurtling down the west side of Vail Pass on I70. It was their first time in the mountains, and it took me a while to cotton to the fact that descents made their ears uncomfortable, and so they were clinging to me for comfort.
A selfie, a few treats and all was well - they went back to sleep in their hammock.
posted by Pogo_Fuzzybutt at 8:35 AM on September 4, 2015 [8 favorites]
See profile pic. Me and my boys, hurtling down the west side of Vail Pass on I70. It was their first time in the mountains, and it took me a while to cotton to the fact that descents made their ears uncomfortable, and so they were clinging to me for comfort.
A selfie, a few treats and all was well - they went back to sleep in their hammock.
posted by Pogo_Fuzzybutt at 8:35 AM on September 4, 2015 [8 favorites]
Also, stop taking pictures of your dicks.
I mean, look, take pix of whatever part of your own body that you want to have pictures of. But never fucking send them to someone who hasn't specifically and explicitly asked for them. No, responding to your "'sup" message on OKC with "uh, nothing" is not someone who has asked to see your penis. Neither is someone who exists and is female on the internet asking to see your dick solely by dint of their female existence. And if you are not able to say "hey, would you like to see a photo of my dick?" to someone and then take their answer seriously and abide by their dick-seeing wishes then you don't deserve to have any kind of personal dick enjoyment ever.
posted by poffin boffin at 8:39 AM on September 4, 2015 [30 favorites]
I mean, look, take pix of whatever part of your own body that you want to have pictures of. But never fucking send them to someone who hasn't specifically and explicitly asked for them. No, responding to your "'sup" message on OKC with "uh, nothing" is not someone who has asked to see your penis. Neither is someone who exists and is female on the internet asking to see your dick solely by dint of their female existence. And if you are not able to say "hey, would you like to see a photo of my dick?" to someone and then take their answer seriously and abide by their dick-seeing wishes then you don't deserve to have any kind of personal dick enjoyment ever.
posted by poffin boffin at 8:39 AM on September 4, 2015 [30 favorites]
hurtling down the west side of Vail Pass on I70.
... You were driving and taking selfies? I am all for other people taking selfies generally but maybe not that kind.
posted by asperity at 8:40 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
... You were driving and taking selfies? I am all for other people taking selfies generally but maybe not that kind.
posted by asperity at 8:40 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
This is me (with my son) not quite getting the hang of the selfie process.
posted by Greg_Ace at 8:40 AM on September 4, 2015 [16 favorites]
posted by Greg_Ace at 8:40 AM on September 4, 2015 [16 favorites]
Selfies are great, and anyone who wants to take and share them should not be shamed for doing so. Calling people who don't like selfies "trash" and suggesting that they are fundamental parts of the process of self-acceptance, however, is way off-base. Not everyone is an exhibitionist, and people are entitled to their opinions of subjects as anodyne as selfies without being denigrated.
posted by grumpybear69 at 8:45 AM on September 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by grumpybear69 at 8:45 AM on September 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
A gentleman hires a proper painter to render a portrait. A "selfie" is vulgar.
posted by theorique at 9:04 AM on September 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by theorique at 9:04 AM on September 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
As was recently proven on MetaFilter, the proper way to get people to look at your dick pics willingly is to Photoshop arms and a face on your deal and make it have wacky adventures.
posted by prize bull octorok at 9:04 AM on September 4, 2015 [16 favorites]
posted by prize bull octorok at 9:04 AM on September 4, 2015 [16 favorites]
I take selfies of myself with strangers' dogs and hashtag them #selfwithnotmydog. I copied the idea from a friend, and a few other friends started doing it too. Here's one of my favorites.
posted by BuddhaInABucket at 9:10 AM on September 4, 2015 [21 favorites]
posted by BuddhaInABucket at 9:10 AM on September 4, 2015 [21 favorites]
#boytime #boysnightout #boystoys #iamaboyama
posted by oceanjesse at 9:14 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by oceanjesse at 9:14 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
And here's my overdue good hair day selfie for the thread!
posted by SansPoint at 9:35 AM on September 4, 2015 [15 favorites]
posted by SansPoint at 9:35 AM on September 4, 2015 [15 favorites]
I wish I could find it again, but someone pointed out that selfies are a way for POCs to see themselves in a visual landscape that often ignores them, especially WOC.
It's been said more than once, but here's the one I know how to find.
It's been said more than once, but here's the one I know how to find.
There is no longer only one way to be proper, or only one way to be beautiful. On the internet we can see transgender men and women, people of color, women of color, queer and fat folk taking pictures of themselves and posting it on Tumblr, Instagram, Facebook — and we can the invariable likes, favorites, reblogs increasing. People are now encouraged to think for themselves: what is beauty to them?posted by babelfish at 10:02 AM on September 4, 2015 [5 favorites]
Back when I coined the term "goatse.cx" for selfies, no one seem to much appreciate mine. Humph.
posted by maxwelton at 10:03 AM on September 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by maxwelton at 10:03 AM on September 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
I found this piece very funny and full of good tips for myself, but it seems like this thread is showing me that the men of Metafilter already have some fairly solid selfie-game.
posted by MCMikeNamara at 10:16 AM on September 4, 2015 [4 favorites]
posted by MCMikeNamara at 10:16 AM on September 4, 2015 [4 favorites]
Kitteh: If my husband weren't so anti picture-taking, I'd encourage him more
Is he against taking photos, or people taking photos of him? If it's the latter, then this is for him.
My mother-in-law is notoriously hard to photograph, and she always complains that she doesn't photograph well, while she says my father-in-law always looks good. I tend to agree with her, for the simple fact that he smiles and she doesn't. She's the generally happier of the two (FIL named himself "grumpa" because he's so often grumpy, but can also joke about it), but frets a lot about her appearance, while he is happy to smile for a camera, even if he isn't done up.
In short, I support the idea of being comfortable as yourself to the point you can take photos of yourself without obsessing about them. Selfies are often awkward, so if you're comfortable with awkward photos of yourself, you're doing well.
posted by filthy light thief at 10:18 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
Is he against taking photos, or people taking photos of him? If it's the latter, then this is for him.
My mother-in-law is notoriously hard to photograph, and she always complains that she doesn't photograph well, while she says my father-in-law always looks good. I tend to agree with her, for the simple fact that he smiles and she doesn't. She's the generally happier of the two (FIL named himself "grumpa" because he's so often grumpy, but can also joke about it), but frets a lot about her appearance, while he is happy to smile for a camera, even if he isn't done up.
In short, I support the idea of being comfortable as yourself to the point you can take photos of yourself without obsessing about them. Selfies are often awkward, so if you're comfortable with awkward photos of yourself, you're doing well.
posted by filthy light thief at 10:18 AM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
I don't take selfies, but this is a good reminder to take more self-portraits.
(Because I'm kinda pretentious, tbh.)
posted by klangklangston at 10:30 AM on September 4, 2015
(Because I'm kinda pretentious, tbh.)
posted by klangklangston at 10:30 AM on September 4, 2015
Me with my burn-after-photographing mustache.
posted by grumpybear69 at 10:36 AM on September 4, 2015 [10 favorites]
posted by grumpybear69 at 10:36 AM on September 4, 2015 [10 favorites]
No.
posted by smidgen at 10:40 AM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by smidgen at 10:40 AM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
My day off selfie which means I'm currently being run over by my 11th month old.
posted by Stynxno at 10:41 AM on September 4, 2015 [15 favorites]
posted by Stynxno at 10:41 AM on September 4, 2015 [15 favorites]
WHO RUN BARTERTOWN
posted by griphus at 10:46 AM on September 4, 2015 [6 favorites]
posted by griphus at 10:46 AM on September 4, 2015 [6 favorites]
My first ridiculously self-indulgent, self-consciously-trying-to-look-attractive selfie over here on my Facebook author page. It really took a lot for me to summon up the nerve to post it because I'm all shirtless and posing like I think too much of myself in it, which as anybody who knows me well knows is totally out of character for me. I lost a lot of weight (over 40 lbs) over the last six months or so, and I've always had terrible body image anxieties (being that guy who never, ever went shirtless in public even at the beach or swimming pool). There's also a photo of what I looked like before I lost the weight. So anyway, there's my breakthrough selfie moment for you, in the spirit of the thread.
posted by saulgoodman at 11:04 AM on September 4, 2015 [20 favorites]
posted by saulgoodman at 11:04 AM on September 4, 2015 [20 favorites]
Dang Saulgoodman, you a looker ;-)
posted by Annika Cicada at 11:15 AM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by Annika Cicada at 11:15 AM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
I'm selfie-aversed, but I enjoy documenting other people's selfies
posted by numaner at 11:48 AM on September 4, 2015 [7 favorites]
posted by numaner at 11:48 AM on September 4, 2015 [7 favorites]
oh god i love this thread so much
posted by alby at 11:53 AM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by alby at 11:53 AM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
guys guys how do i favourite a comment twice on metafilter dot com
posted by alby at 11:54 AM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by alby at 11:54 AM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
I'm loving these selfies you guys look good!
I am one of those people who has pretty much always hated pictures of myself, although I think I look fine in the mirror. But takiing pictures of myself in the mirror did not make it better.
It's been helpful having the ability to practice taking selfies for those times when others insist on taking your picture AND THEN SHOWING I T TO YOU FFS
posted by maggiemaggie at 12:09 PM on September 4, 2015
I am one of those people who has pretty much always hated pictures of myself, although I think I look fine in the mirror. But takiing pictures of myself in the mirror did not make it better.
It's been helpful having the ability to practice taking selfies for those times when others insist on taking your picture AND THEN SHOWING I T TO YOU FFS
posted by maggiemaggie at 12:09 PM on September 4, 2015
Hrm. This is tricky for me to grapple with. I mean, the advice seems sound, and useful to some people, but I'm still generally someone who wants to avoid photos-of-self or anything that draws attention to me. I don't want to be beautiful. Solid-green or grey t-shirt, earth-tone shorts/pants; that sort of thing. Be invisible/unremarked upon rather than noticed (or even drawing attention to myself).
posted by CrystalDave at 12:21 PM on September 4, 2015 [4 favorites]
posted by CrystalDave at 12:21 PM on September 4, 2015 [4 favorites]
Use the mirror as the viewfinder! Turn that camera around and shoot direct.
posted by the man of twists and turns at 12:37 PM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by the man of twists and turns at 12:37 PM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
Aw, thanks Annika Cicada... I needed that. (Blushes kicks ground with toe.)
posted by saulgoodman at 12:43 PM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by saulgoodman at 12:43 PM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
You have to use a narcissistick to get a proper selfie.
posted by njohnson23 at 12:45 PM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by njohnson23 at 12:45 PM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
But I wouldn't want to appear selfie-sh!
posted by Greg_Ace at 12:58 PM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by Greg_Ace at 12:58 PM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
I love this thread, and love seeing everyone's selfies. You all have a new follower on Instagram.
I did a self-portrait personal project, because I'd get so nervous taking shots of myself for photography homework that I'd have to go throw up first before I could shoot. About a zillion crappy shots later, I can now be in front of the camera without feeling like I'm going to die.
posted by culfinglin at 1:17 PM on September 4, 2015 [7 favorites]
I did a self-portrait personal project, because I'd get so nervous taking shots of myself for photography homework that I'd have to go throw up first before I could shoot. About a zillion crappy shots later, I can now be in front of the camera without feeling like I'm going to die.
posted by culfinglin at 1:17 PM on September 4, 2015 [7 favorites]
Greg Nog, I followed you on instagram solely on the strength of that selfie.
I have a similar "HEY BROTHER" photo from back in the day but this is my typical look.
posted by a halcyon day at 1:22 PM on September 4, 2015 [8 favorites]
I have a similar "HEY BROTHER" photo from back in the day but this is my typical look.
posted by a halcyon day at 1:22 PM on September 4, 2015 [8 favorites]
I take selfies of myself with strangers' dogs and hashtag them #selfwithnotmydog. I copied the idea from a friend, and a few other friends started doing it too. Here's one of my favorites.
posted by BuddhaInABucket at 9:10 AM on September 4 [12 favorites −] Favorite added! [!]
How does this comment not have more favorites? That picture is PERFECTION.
Being decrepit and out of touch, I always had exactly the negative opinion of selfies that you would expect from the decrepit and out of touch. But last week I was looking at the instagram feed of my friend's teenage daughter and now I kind of get it. It was basically all cute selfies, each followed by a dozen adorable and often funny comments from her young friends telling her how beautiful and loved she is, and I imagine she is commenting similarly on their feeds. This would have been a very good thing to have as a teen. I approve.
posted by HotToddy at 1:44 PM on September 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by BuddhaInABucket at 9:10 AM on September 4 [12 favorites −] Favorite added! [!]
How does this comment not have more favorites? That picture is PERFECTION.
Being decrepit and out of touch, I always had exactly the negative opinion of selfies that you would expect from the decrepit and out of touch. But last week I was looking at the instagram feed of my friend's teenage daughter and now I kind of get it. It was basically all cute selfies, each followed by a dozen adorable and often funny comments from her young friends telling her how beautiful and loved she is, and I imagine she is commenting similarly on their feeds. This would have been a very good thing to have as a teen. I approve.
posted by HotToddy at 1:44 PM on September 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
"this is my typical look."
Salvation Mountain?
posted by klangklangston at 1:49 PM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
Salvation Mountain?
posted by klangklangston at 1:49 PM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
Yep, Salvation Mountain. I don't live in Slab City, though.
posted by a halcyon day at 2:22 PM on September 4, 2015
posted by a halcyon day at 2:22 PM on September 4, 2015
I have always been prone to taking pictures of myself whenever I'm left unattended with a camera.
One day at work I got into the curtains to make a DIY photobooth to document my My Little Pony hair.
As a fat lady, fat babe selfie culture on Tumblr makes me feel better about existing in my body. Thanks internet!
posted by Saminal at 2:58 PM on September 4, 2015 [9 favorites]
One day at work I got into the curtains to make a DIY photobooth to document my My Little Pony hair.
As a fat lady, fat babe selfie culture on Tumblr makes me feel better about existing in my body. Thanks internet!
posted by Saminal at 2:58 PM on September 4, 2015 [9 favorites]
I like to experiment with the form of selfies
posted by The Whelk at 3:03 PM on September 4, 2015 [9 favorites]
posted by The Whelk at 3:03 PM on September 4, 2015 [9 favorites]
The very idea that what is wrong with the modern world is a lack of self - regard and ego is so very very wrong that I don't know where to start.
posted by wilful at 3:42 PM on September 4, 2015
posted by wilful at 3:42 PM on September 4, 2015
Dude should probably have taken the Werther's out between his teeth and lips before taking the pictures, tho'. Unless #echidnaface is a thing and I missed it.
posted by scruss at 4:15 PM on September 4, 2015
posted by scruss at 4:15 PM on September 4, 2015
I only do selfies because I primarily do wearable crafts, and by the time I finish them (late at night at home) there's nobody around to photograph the evidence. Either that or I got a new hairdo and have a similar situation going on.
I don't really like doing them much and mostly feel kinda ashamed to, so it baffles me that it's so trendy.
posted by jenfullmoon at 4:17 PM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
I don't really like doing them much and mostly feel kinda ashamed to, so it baffles me that it's so trendy.
posted by jenfullmoon at 4:17 PM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
No one tell my boyfriend that metafilter is full of so many hot dudes, or he'll resent how much time I spend on it more than he already does!
posted by misskaz at 4:42 PM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by misskaz at 4:42 PM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
Metafilter is full of the hawtness.
posted by culfinglin at 4:45 PM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by culfinglin at 4:45 PM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
#echidnaface
Some of us of his extraction come with those big, protruding lips as standard. They can be quite handy at times like, for example, when you are 8 years old and going downhill on your bicycle and need to really open up the throttle.
posted by Freelance Demiurge at 6:04 PM on September 4, 2015
Some of us of his extraction come with those big, protruding lips as standard. They can be quite handy at times like, for example, when you are 8 years old and going downhill on your bicycle and need to really open up the throttle.
posted by Freelance Demiurge at 6:04 PM on September 4, 2015
selfies can be a nice way to remind yourself that you think you look pretty fi-i-ine even though nobody on okcupid seems to agree what the fuck??
heard this from a friend, anyway
posted by threeants at 7:28 PM on September 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
heard this from a friend, anyway
posted by threeants at 7:28 PM on September 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
There exist no pictures of me where I don't look terrible and I can't figure out if I'm delusional when I think I look cute in the mirror or what's going on. So I mostly just feel left out when other people can take cute pics.
posted by dame at 7:37 PM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by dame at 7:37 PM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
There exist no pictures of me where I don't look terrible
A. Nah, you are actually, truly, being far too critical. Probably out of habit.
B. So what if your pictures don't look good. You will never look any better - time makes us all.... well, look not so young.
C. Sometimes, the camera on your phone will show you not the mirror image you are used to seeing. It's the image others actually see (no Left-right reversal). This can be extremely disconcerting if you're not expecting it.
posted by Pogo_Fuzzybutt at 7:44 PM on September 4, 2015 [4 favorites]
A. Nah, you are actually, truly, being far too critical. Probably out of habit.
B. So what if your pictures don't look good. You will never look any better - time makes us all.... well, look not so young.
C. Sometimes, the camera on your phone will show you not the mirror image you are used to seeing. It's the image others actually see (no Left-right reversal). This can be extremely disconcerting if you're not expecting it.
posted by Pogo_Fuzzybutt at 7:44 PM on September 4, 2015 [4 favorites]
No seriously. I am not okay with pictures of me. It's not like "a little off". It's like "why don't children go running". Some of us are just not photogenic. And some lucky fuckers look better in photos than in real life. Oh well.
posted by dame at 7:55 PM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by dame at 7:55 PM on September 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
If you think selfies are bad for any reason, I don’t want to know. I suggest getting in a bin and sharing your bad opinions with the other trash.
People who disagree with him are garbage? Enjoy your selfies, fine fellow.
posted by jayder at 8:01 PM on September 4, 2015
People who disagree with him are garbage? Enjoy your selfies, fine fellow.
posted by jayder at 8:01 PM on September 4, 2015
Yes! So many cute men in my life and I want mooorrre pictures of them. You guys too!
Body positivity is for everyone and cute selfies are a great start!
Thanks to all the men sharing here.
posted by littlewater at 9:56 PM on September 4, 2015
Body positivity is for everyone and cute selfies are a great start!
Thanks to all the men sharing here.
posted by littlewater at 9:56 PM on September 4, 2015
I am about eight years old at heart and view a selfie as a chance to play with all the crazy filters and effects. Life's too short to fear looking silly or lowbrow, that's my philosophy.
posted by DrMew at 10:31 PM on September 4, 2015 [7 favorites]
posted by DrMew at 10:31 PM on September 4, 2015 [7 favorites]
I don't really like doing them much and mostly feel kinda ashamed to, so it baffles me that it's so trendy.
I feel like that's sort of the unwritten point of this essay in some ways--that we should be taking selfies in part because we're ashamed to do it. Like, I'm horrified by the idea of selfies and only do them rarely, because I feel so guilty and weird being like HEY PEOPLE LOOK AT MY FACE. And--why do I feel like that?
(essay on probable causes deleted)
And the thing about selfie culture, about tumblr and twitter and instagram and whatever, is that you almost never see people responding meanly. you post a selfie and half a dozen people favorite it and someone says that your eyebrows look nice and you're reminded that the way that you see yourself is not necessarily the way that other people see you, and even if they're just doing it to be kind, they're still willing to do that on your behalf. That even if they're just doing it to be kind, they didn't have to.
A while back I posted a picture of my face to tumblr, asking the not-terribly-many-people who follow me there for eyebrow advice. Someone who I've never spoken to, who doesn't even follow me and must've hit my blog in a random search or something, sent me a message that started, 'hey, beautiful! first off, your eyes are amazing, and i think that your brows look great! if you wanted to step up your game, tho...'
It made me cry because it was so fucking kind. I saved the message. I started crying again when I opened it to type that out, because seriously, when was the last time that someone said to you hey, you look beautiful and it wasn't creepy or weird or aggressive, it was just...kind. That's what selfie culture can be like. The user who sent the message has changed her url or deleted her blog. I'm never going to talk to her. But I kinda wish I could, just to say thanks.
posted by MeghanC at 11:03 PM on September 4, 2015 [10 favorites]
I feel like that's sort of the unwritten point of this essay in some ways--that we should be taking selfies in part because we're ashamed to do it. Like, I'm horrified by the idea of selfies and only do them rarely, because I feel so guilty and weird being like HEY PEOPLE LOOK AT MY FACE. And--why do I feel like that?
(essay on probable causes deleted)
And the thing about selfie culture, about tumblr and twitter and instagram and whatever, is that you almost never see people responding meanly. you post a selfie and half a dozen people favorite it and someone says that your eyebrows look nice and you're reminded that the way that you see yourself is not necessarily the way that other people see you, and even if they're just doing it to be kind, they're still willing to do that on your behalf. That even if they're just doing it to be kind, they didn't have to.
A while back I posted a picture of my face to tumblr, asking the not-terribly-many-people who follow me there for eyebrow advice. Someone who I've never spoken to, who doesn't even follow me and must've hit my blog in a random search or something, sent me a message that started, 'hey, beautiful! first off, your eyes are amazing, and i think that your brows look great! if you wanted to step up your game, tho...'
It made me cry because it was so fucking kind. I saved the message. I started crying again when I opened it to type that out, because seriously, when was the last time that someone said to you hey, you look beautiful and it wasn't creepy or weird or aggressive, it was just...kind. That's what selfie culture can be like. The user who sent the message has changed her url or deleted her blog. I'm never going to talk to her. But I kinda wish I could, just to say thanks.
posted by MeghanC at 11:03 PM on September 4, 2015 [10 favorites]
One thing that helped me solve the issues of looking wretched in all my shots was to learn how to light and pose other people. William Mortensen's book on how to work with models was priceless. If you can find a copy, it's worth it.
posted by culfinglin at 11:09 PM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by culfinglin at 11:09 PM on September 4, 2015 [2 favorites]
Oh, cool! Anand is a friend of a friend, so I saw this through twitter. If you check out his feed, he's tweeting a lot of responses to this, many of which are very, very hostile - it seems masculinity is especially fragile when it comes to taking nice pictures of oneself.
Having hung in a reasonably similar crowd online, I can absolutely back up the idea that the selfie phenomenon has helped many people get right with and feel happy about how they look. It's amazing to watch people start to feel good about themselves. Just brilliant. I can't help but feel sorry for people whose reaction to this is a knee jerk snorting about vanity or superficiality or getting the hump about a silly joke about getting in the bin. They have in a very literal sense no idea what they are talking about.
posted by ominous_paws at 12:36 AM on September 5, 2015 [1 favorite]
Having hung in a reasonably similar crowd online, I can absolutely back up the idea that the selfie phenomenon has helped many people get right with and feel happy about how they look. It's amazing to watch people start to feel good about themselves. Just brilliant. I can't help but feel sorry for people whose reaction to this is a knee jerk snorting about vanity or superficiality or getting the hump about a silly joke about getting in the bin. They have in a very literal sense no idea what they are talking about.
posted by ominous_paws at 12:36 AM on September 5, 2015 [1 favorite]
I am cursed with an incredibly photogenic husband and a not-so-photogenic self. But, out of a batch of a zillion selfies usually one or two come out alright. And even the ones where I frown at the weird lumpenness of my face my friends still love me for. Even the 'lady, are you trying to murder someone with your eyes' are still okay.
I have major issues recognising myself - I read something once, about how in people with eating disorders when they see themselves specifically everything gets routed through emotion before it hits processing. Which happens with me - I will see part of myself, or not expect to see myself, and in that moment I can recognise certain things about my appearance that once I see it as me become worthless and offputting and terrible. Selfies help with that, in terms of actually looking at myself more than usual, and seeing how lighting and angles change everything about my face.
I'm never going to look effortlessly attractive in casual photos the way my partner does. I take some terrible selfies too. But my friends still love my face, so I take them and post them and deal.
I have a few friends who refuse to show their faces (online friends) or who have this select set of photos that reveal almost nothing about their appearance. It's heart-breaking, as their friend, to watch them loathe themselves, their bodies, SO much. Both are dudes, for what it's worth, and both have had not great experiences with people judging their appearances from what I can gather. But, the thing is, when you love someone they are beautiful. Not that they look beautiful, the are. I don't know how to help them see that, it's probably not my place to, but I wish they'd get on this selfie thing. Because more love makes things better, not worse, and selfie culture (in my experience) has been overwhelmingly about love.
posted by geek anachronism at 1:34 AM on September 5, 2015 [3 favorites]
I have major issues recognising myself - I read something once, about how in people with eating disorders when they see themselves specifically everything gets routed through emotion before it hits processing. Which happens with me - I will see part of myself, or not expect to see myself, and in that moment I can recognise certain things about my appearance that once I see it as me become worthless and offputting and terrible. Selfies help with that, in terms of actually looking at myself more than usual, and seeing how lighting and angles change everything about my face.
I'm never going to look effortlessly attractive in casual photos the way my partner does. I take some terrible selfies too. But my friends still love my face, so I take them and post them and deal.
I have a few friends who refuse to show their faces (online friends) or who have this select set of photos that reveal almost nothing about their appearance. It's heart-breaking, as their friend, to watch them loathe themselves, their bodies, SO much. Both are dudes, for what it's worth, and both have had not great experiences with people judging their appearances from what I can gather. But, the thing is, when you love someone they are beautiful. Not that they look beautiful, the are. I don't know how to help them see that, it's probably not my place to, but I wish they'd get on this selfie thing. Because more love makes things better, not worse, and selfie culture (in my experience) has been overwhelmingly about love.
posted by geek anachronism at 1:34 AM on September 5, 2015 [3 favorites]
Gamechanger thread for another out of touch person - I am totally a product of the last century, no doubt about that now. It's so weird to me that this is considered an ok thing to do. Until this thread, I've felt (not really thought about in a considered way) that taking selfies is a somehow inappropriately serious thing to do. Taking yourself as an object in that way just feels a bit wrong; making the end result public (possibly available to just anyone!) feels extra super wrong (because I miss privacy and things being more tangible and less permanent, and jfc, some people's photos wind up embarrassing them by taking flight into hilarious memedom, maybe I'll be embarrassed in a hilarious meme? How do I know who the people I know know? Or who those people know? I haven't vetted any of them ). And, I had the idea that what seemed like a desire for approval was, not wrong, but maybe a little unseemly, definitely vulnerable.
But it appears that it's not that way at all. It's not essentially, or only, about a desire for approval (which is a normal thing to want, why wouldn't it be), it's just participating in life as it is now, and avoiding seriousness with such seriousness is the really tragic thing.
You guys all look fantastic.
posted by cotton dress sock at 2:45 AM on September 5, 2015 [6 favorites]
But it appears that it's not that way at all. It's not essentially, or only, about a desire for approval (which is a normal thing to want, why wouldn't it be), it's just participating in life as it is now, and avoiding seriousness with such seriousness is the really tragic thing.
You guys all look fantastic.
posted by cotton dress sock at 2:45 AM on September 5, 2015 [6 favorites]
But, the thing is, when you love someone they are beautiful. Not that they look beautiful, the are.
Most adults don't fall in love with strangers, but instead grow to love them over time. If this process begins with dating, as opposed to getting to know each other in a non-romantic context, then I think it's fair to say that appearance plays a role. It's the first thing people see about you and judge you on (and in the case of online dating, often the last).
Whether a person possesses the qualities that actually matter for love such as kindness, patience, and devotion can only be reliably determined after interacting with them for months. Strangers mostly have only the superficial to go on when they are deciding whether they should invest their time and emotion into a relationship with this person.
To a person who believes themselves to be hideous, the idea that someone they find attractive might want to talk to them, much less spend time getting to know and accept them, is simply alien. They see their faces and bodies as flaws to be compensated for with other superficials like charisma, personality, wealth, etc. If they don't posses any of those either, convincing someone to 'give them a chance' may as well be impossible.
Fwiw, I don't disagree with your points. I'm just articulating my own views because I personally have been down this road many times. I've tried to keep it universal since gender is clearly no obstacle for dysmorphias and self-hatred, but it is obviously a male-centric view.
posted by Freelance Demiurge at 4:36 AM on September 5, 2015 [1 favorite]
Most adults don't fall in love with strangers, but instead grow to love them over time. If this process begins with dating, as opposed to getting to know each other in a non-romantic context, then I think it's fair to say that appearance plays a role. It's the first thing people see about you and judge you on (and in the case of online dating, often the last).
Whether a person possesses the qualities that actually matter for love such as kindness, patience, and devotion can only be reliably determined after interacting with them for months. Strangers mostly have only the superficial to go on when they are deciding whether they should invest their time and emotion into a relationship with this person.
To a person who believes themselves to be hideous, the idea that someone they find attractive might want to talk to them, much less spend time getting to know and accept them, is simply alien. They see their faces and bodies as flaws to be compensated for with other superficials like charisma, personality, wealth, etc. If they don't posses any of those either, convincing someone to 'give them a chance' may as well be impossible.
Fwiw, I don't disagree with your points. I'm just articulating my own views because I personally have been down this road many times. I've tried to keep it universal since gender is clearly no obstacle for dysmorphias and self-hatred, but it is obviously a male-centric view.
posted by Freelance Demiurge at 4:36 AM on September 5, 2015 [1 favorite]
Aw man I really love a sick-day selfie. While still staged (like everything) they tend to be more honestly scrubby than #nomakeup shots.
I swear, breaking my arm and being all dopey on pain meds produced some nice selfies.
Then I got a hinged brace after surgery and moved up to some next level shit. Since I can't reach my face with my right hand, they were for the most part sans makeup (not that I didn't compensate with some effects, because I cannot help myself.)
I felt self conscious about posting selfies, and said so, but they made me feel good. I get to play this sleek, sexy, powerful character, even though I can't hold a can of soda. It's a way to be creative that doesn't overwhelm my injured arm.
I am not naturally photogenic at all. Candids of me tend to look really awful. It took a lot of practice to be able to shoot myself reasonably well.
posted by louche mustachio at 5:03 AM on September 5, 2015 [3 favorites]
As was recently proven on MetaFilter, the proper way to get people to look at your dick pics willingly is to Photoshop arms and a face on your deal and make it have wacky adventures.
The way to deal with unsolicited dick pics is to Photoshop them onto the face of the sender.
For some reason I don't ever get unsolicited dick pics though, so I have not yet had the opportunity to put that into practice. /notcomplaining
posted by louche mustachio at 5:14 AM on September 5, 2015 [1 favorite]
I'm not very photogenic, pretty camera shy, and I don't usually take (or post!!) selfies, but MetaFilter has been great about nudging me out of my comfort zone so before I have coffee, way down here at the bottom of the thread, I'm going to post this accidental selfie taken a couple of weeks ago when my oldest and dearest BFF and his husband came to town. And now I'm going to hit post. Here I go. Ugh.
posted by Room 641-A at 7:06 AM on September 5, 2015 [9 favorites]
posted by Room 641-A at 7:06 AM on September 5, 2015 [9 favorites]
There exist no pictures of me where I don't look terrible and I can't figure out if I'm delusional when I think I look cute in the mirror or what's going on.
This is me exactly, and when I try to explain people say "oh everyone thinks they look horrible in pictures!". It's not that, though. I can think I look cute in the mirror and take a photo *right* then in the mirror and suddenly ew, WTF. Could be some Dorian Grey shit, but I don't think I'm that bad a person. The disconnect between what I see and what I see in the camera is really disconcerting.
posted by oneirodynia at 9:22 AM on September 5, 2015 [1 favorite]
This is me exactly, and when I try to explain people say "oh everyone thinks they look horrible in pictures!". It's not that, though. I can think I look cute in the mirror and take a photo *right* then in the mirror and suddenly ew, WTF. Could be some Dorian Grey shit, but I don't think I'm that bad a person. The disconnect between what I see and what I see in the camera is really disconcerting.
posted by oneirodynia at 9:22 AM on September 5, 2015 [1 favorite]
I like to experiment with the form of selfies
Me, too, The Whelk! Here's a Borges-inspired take on selfies I like to call a "no-selfie" I took recently.
posted by saulgoodman at 9:59 AM on September 5, 2015 [1 favorite]
Me, too, The Whelk! Here's a Borges-inspired take on selfies I like to call a "no-selfie" I took recently.
posted by saulgoodman at 9:59 AM on September 5, 2015 [1 favorite]
This is the greatest selfie I've ever taken. In an elevator in Brooklyn. Rebirth yourself!
posted by wemayfreeze at 9:38 PM on September 5, 2015 [5 favorites]
posted by wemayfreeze at 9:38 PM on September 5, 2015 [5 favorites]
The disconnect between what I see and what I see in the camera is really disconcerting.
I was going to say that I've just given up on being objective, and seeing ifdssn9's sweet comment brings that home because obviously (?) I think it's a flattering picture, but I don't really know if it's accurate? And it goes both ways, with good pictures and bad (or good days and bad.) I think I sort of attach the compliment (or dig) to the photo, if that makes sense.
Anyway I do think selfies and fb and all the "looking inward" needs to be dialed back some (that ship may have sailed) but I do see a lot more of the value now, especially looking at it as a 20-something on tumblr. Or younger probably! I'm old! It's okay! Go take selfies of your fabulous selves.
posted by Room 641-A at 9:05 AM on September 6, 2015 [1 favorite]
I was going to say that I've just given up on being objective, and seeing ifdssn9's sweet comment brings that home because obviously (?) I think it's a flattering picture, but I don't really know if it's accurate? And it goes both ways, with good pictures and bad (or good days and bad.) I think I sort of attach the compliment (or dig) to the photo, if that makes sense.
Anyway I do think selfies and fb and all the "looking inward" needs to be dialed back some (that ship may have sailed) but I do see a lot more of the value now, especially looking at it as a 20-something on tumblr. Or younger probably! I'm old! It's okay! Go take selfies of your fabulous selves.
posted by Room 641-A at 9:05 AM on September 6, 2015 [1 favorite]
"dame, I don't know about you, but my face is insanely hard to light correctly. I read somewhere that a lot of white people have a banana face and it's a lot easier to light than my particular kind of face? "
Eh… Really dark skin can be harder to light, especially against things that you want really light detail in (e.g. wedding dresses), but that's because of the dynamic range. Darker skin isn't inherently harder to light, it just requires metering for a different exposure and watching for highlight/shadow balance. What might be happening is that cameras set to auto may be better at capturing white faces, but learning to use manual settings is part of getting better shots anyway (even on camera phones). The color balance can be different too, especially since most of these are digital — brown in screen and RGB schemes is pretty much just a low-luminosity orange, so increasing blue on top of darker skin can get wonky in a way that it's less prone to do on lighter skin.
"This is me exactly, and when I try to explain people say "oh everyone thinks they look horrible in pictures!". It's not that, though. I can think I look cute in the mirror and take a photo *right* then in the mirror and suddenly ew, WTF. Could be some Dorian Grey shit, but I don't think I'm that bad a person. The disconnect between what I see and what I see in the camera is really disconcerting."
There are a couple of things that can be going on just on the difference between your eye and a camera: Your eyes have a much better dynamic range than pretty much any display, and one of the things that subtle shifts in color helps with is sensing depth — that, combined with the literal flattening from three dimensions to two, is a big part of the "camera adds ten pounds" trope.
Something else that's part of why you may look significantly different is that most camera phones have a wide-angle lens, which distorts images and is known for making faces, especially from close up, look more bulbous than you are. (And I don't think any of the major photosharing software has a good filter to correct for the wide angle.)
posted by klangklangston at 1:42 PM on September 6, 2015 [2 favorites]
Eh… Really dark skin can be harder to light, especially against things that you want really light detail in (e.g. wedding dresses), but that's because of the dynamic range. Darker skin isn't inherently harder to light, it just requires metering for a different exposure and watching for highlight/shadow balance. What might be happening is that cameras set to auto may be better at capturing white faces, but learning to use manual settings is part of getting better shots anyway (even on camera phones). The color balance can be different too, especially since most of these are digital — brown in screen and RGB schemes is pretty much just a low-luminosity orange, so increasing blue on top of darker skin can get wonky in a way that it's less prone to do on lighter skin.
"This is me exactly, and when I try to explain people say "oh everyone thinks they look horrible in pictures!". It's not that, though. I can think I look cute in the mirror and take a photo *right* then in the mirror and suddenly ew, WTF. Could be some Dorian Grey shit, but I don't think I'm that bad a person. The disconnect between what I see and what I see in the camera is really disconcerting."
There are a couple of things that can be going on just on the difference between your eye and a camera: Your eyes have a much better dynamic range than pretty much any display, and one of the things that subtle shifts in color helps with is sensing depth — that, combined with the literal flattening from three dimensions to two, is a big part of the "camera adds ten pounds" trope.
Something else that's part of why you may look significantly different is that most camera phones have a wide-angle lens, which distorts images and is known for making faces, especially from close up, look more bulbous than you are. (And I don't think any of the major photosharing software has a good filter to correct for the wide angle.)
posted by klangklangston at 1:42 PM on September 6, 2015 [2 favorites]
I love all the selfies you're posting. You all look fantastic. :)
posted by triggerfinger at 5:06 PM on September 6, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by triggerfinger at 5:06 PM on September 6, 2015 [1 favorite]
I wish I could find it again, but someone pointed out that selfies are a way for POCs to see themselves in a visual landscape that often ignores them, especially WOC.
This may not be what you're thinking of, but here's one place that talks about it.
Here's another:
I live in a world where either body privilege or race privilege is always against me. So I point my camera at my face, most often when I am alone, and possibly bored, and I click; I upload it to instagram, and I hold my breath because the world is cruel and I am what some would call ugly, but I don’t see it. At first I clicked so I could see what others saw, but I don’t. So now I click and post and breathe, waiting for others to see what I see: beautiful dark skin, Afrika’s son, a dream un-deferred, pretty eyes,and nice lips, and a nose that fits my face; I want them, you, to see that I am human, and there is a reason why I got to this size, but I owe you no explanation or justification for any part of my existence I owe you no explanation or justification for my smile or my swag or my selfie. Hell I didn’t even owe you this.
Like I said, I owe you nothing, but I owe myself everything.
posted by triggerfinger at 5:27 PM on September 6, 2015 [2 favorites]
This may not be what you're thinking of, but here's one place that talks about it.
Here's another:
I live in a world where either body privilege or race privilege is always against me. So I point my camera at my face, most often when I am alone, and possibly bored, and I click; I upload it to instagram, and I hold my breath because the world is cruel and I am what some would call ugly, but I don’t see it. At first I clicked so I could see what others saw, but I don’t. So now I click and post and breathe, waiting for others to see what I see: beautiful dark skin, Afrika’s son, a dream un-deferred, pretty eyes,and nice lips, and a nose that fits my face; I want them, you, to see that I am human, and there is a reason why I got to this size, but I owe you no explanation or justification for any part of my existence I owe you no explanation or justification for my smile or my swag or my selfie. Hell I didn’t even owe you this.
Like I said, I owe you nothing, but I owe myself everything.
posted by triggerfinger at 5:27 PM on September 6, 2015 [2 favorites]
Missed this post the first time around, caught it on the podcast. Anyway, I wanted to point out the posts by Janice Waugh of The Solo Traveler Blog of How to Take a Selfie [originally written in 2011 before the term "selfie" became widespread, since edited to include the term] and In Defense of the Selfie. Naturally focuses on travel selfies, oh, and Janice's selfies look great, especially in the second post.
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 6:47 AM on September 15, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 6:47 AM on September 15, 2015 [1 favorite]
Just catching up and I want to say that you all look great in your selfies! I think it's really helped me to take selfies. I still hate pictures that most other people take of me, but selfies have definitely helped me to learn about angles and lighting and all that fun stuff.
(And I might have followed a lot of you on instagram, hi.)
posted by angelchrys at 7:56 PM on September 29, 2015 [2 favorites]
(And I might have followed a lot of you on instagram, hi.)
posted by angelchrys at 7:56 PM on September 29, 2015 [2 favorites]
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posted by Annika Cicada at 7:28 AM on September 4, 2015 [12 favorites]