I'm gonna kill that kid!
November 2, 2015 9:00 AM   Subscribe

 
Flagged as too early for Christmas.
posted by HeroZero at 9:40 AM on November 2, 2015 [3 favorites]


But it's also too late for Halloween!
posted by me3dia at 9:49 AM on November 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


I had a coworker who is obsessed with this movie. She watches it every day of December.

But she hates scary movies- they give her nightmares. Somehow, this movie is okay.
posted by Monday at 10:22 AM on November 2, 2015


I've always called You're Next a bloodier, gorier version of Home Alone.
posted by imnotasquirrel at 10:24 AM on November 2, 2015 [8 favorites]


Flagged as too early for Christmas.

They're re-releasing the movie in theaters next week. Next week. That's the equivalent of playing Christmas music right after Halloween. It's just not right.

...Still going to watch, though.
posted by imnotasquirrel at 10:26 AM on November 2, 2015


This is where lack of film literacy meets fan theorizing. Home Alone is not a slasher film, it's a home invasion film. In these films, the protagonist hero is menaced by intruders (often criminals) in the protagonist's home, and must fight them off.

It's not Friday the 13th for kids. It's Straw Dogs for kids.
posted by maxsparber at 10:39 AM on November 2, 2015 [24 favorites]


Assault on Precinct 13 the McAllister Residence
posted by infinitewindow at 10:44 AM on November 2, 2015 [5 favorites]


MetaFilter: It's Straw Dogs for kids.
posted by me3dia at 10:59 AM on November 2, 2015 [6 favorites]


This movie clarified for me that I hate slapstick-that-would-actually-kill-you-in-real-life. At least Tom and Jerry could use cartoon physics, but seeing movies try to convince you that real people would survive that kind of violence is unsettling.

So uh, thanks for that, movie.

They're re-releasing the movie in theaters next week. Next week. That's the equivalent of playing Christmas music right after Halloween. It's just not right.

Also, Target had really cute felt Countdown to Christmas calendars on sale for 3.00 today, and I bought one. I am Part of the Problem.

I am trying to enjoy the five more minutes of music playing in my head that isn't Christmas carols. I expect that will end by sundown.
posted by emjaybee at 11:03 AM on November 2, 2015 [2 favorites]


Did Kevin grow up to be Jigsaw?

That's preposterous. Kevin obviously grows up to be the The Collector (2009).
posted by dgaicun at 11:32 AM on November 2, 2015


imnotasquirrel: I've always called You're Next a bloodier, gorier version of Home Alone.

Yep. SEE ALSO: the last act of Skyfall.
posted by brundlefly at 11:57 AM on November 2, 2015 [2 favorites]


Home Alone cannot be a slasher film because I have some small appreciation for slasher films.

Also, why would they re-release this for "the holidays" (groddamned xmas creep...) but not the far superior christmas film, Die Hard?
posted by phearlez at 12:22 PM on November 2, 2015 [1 favorite]




brundlefly: "imnotasquirrel: I've always called You're Next a bloodier, gorier version of Home Alone.

Yep. SEE ALSO: the last act of Skyfall.
"

I've seen the recent Equalizer remake described as Home Alone in Home Depot.
posted by octothorpe at 12:44 PM on November 2, 2015 [2 favorites]


But she hates scary movies- they give her nightmares. Somehow, this movie is okay.

Um so she WASN'T freaked out about the furnace in the basement??
posted by littlesq at 2:52 PM on November 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


I think I may be the last Western human alive that has never seen this movie. See also that movie with the kid and the BB gun, that one with the train and creepy animation, and apparently a host of other feel-good holiday fare. (I also don't care for that Chevy chase one.). I am apparently the grinch.
posted by SecretAgentSockpuppet at 5:19 PM on November 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


See also that movie with the kid and the BB gun...

I didn't see Christmas Story until I was an adult. I guess nostalgia does a lot for it.
posted by brundlefly at 6:00 PM on November 2, 2015 [3 favorites]


SecretAgentSockPuppet, I also dislike the Chevy Chase one! And if you are talking about the Uncanny Valley CGI crapfest that is The Polar Express, that just shows you have a soul.

Home Alone is supposed to be a Christmas movie, but it never made me feel all that Christmas-y.
posted by emjaybee at 6:56 PM on November 2, 2015 [2 favorites]


Home Alone is supposed to be a Christmas movie, but it never made me feel all that Christmas-y.

I think we need to distinguish between movies that merely take place at Christmas (e.g., Home Alone) and true Christmas movies (e.g., Die Hard).
posted by Faint of Butt at 7:16 PM on November 2, 2015 [7 favorites]


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