"It’s going to run rampant. People are going to bring a pizza."

July 26, 2016 6:28 PM

New York Times: "...last week, Gov. Andrew M. Cuomo, a Democrat, signed a law permitting funeral parlors to serve light refreshments and nonalcoholic drinks, joining 46 other states..." The article also mentions funeral potatoes and funeral pie , but omits Koliva and funeral biscuits.
posted by Wordshore (83 comments total)

"The common people in the Colonies tended toward dense shortbread funeral biscuits flavored with molasses, ginger or caraway. Resembling modern-day cookies in size and shape, these were often formed in hand-carved wooden stamping molds that embossed a cross, heart, death's head or cherub on their tops." Fascinating, thanks!

Also: Funeral Cookies: A Collection Of Recipes.
posted by MonkeyToes at 6:38 PM on July 26, 2016 [4 favorites]

I like the concept that funeral homes were going to drive restaurants out of business with their finger foods and light refreshments and lack of tables or chairs or waitstaff or chefs. This was such a danger that only legislation could prevent disaster.
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 6:44 PM on July 26, 2016 [22 favorites]

hey, apparently people were dying to get in

I'll be here all w
posted by threeants at 6:48 PM on July 26, 2016 [22 favorites]

The dead hate it when you eat in front of them.
Also, if you don't eat in front of them.
And they will not be mocked. FYI.
posted by Auden at 6:50 PM on July 26, 2016 [5 favorites]

There are moments when I get the appeal of libertarianism.
posted by Alluring Mouthbreather at 6:52 PM on July 26, 2016 [21 favorites]

". . . the woman of the house prepared leavened dough and placed it to rise on the linen-covered chest of the corpse."

aaaaahhhhhh

ewwwwwww

no wonder people died like flies of communicable diseases
posted by ostro at 6:55 PM on July 26, 2016 [4 favorites]

There will absolutely be pizza. There will be people who order delivery pizza. I have seen pizza delivered to outdoor festivals, school field days, flower viewing parties, and campsites. If it is legal to order pizza delivery somewhere, people will do it.

Not that it's a bad thing, per se, as long as everyone at the funeral is on the same page about it. "Killa J loved his Dominos and his Faygo, and we're gonna respect that at his funeral. RIP, bro."
posted by Bugbread at 6:58 PM on July 26, 2016 [30 favorites]

I'm going to have a stipulation in my will that when I die, there must be pizza at my funeral for the mourners. Good pizza. None of this chain pizzeria shit.
posted by SansPoint at 6:58 PM on July 26, 2016 [13 favorites]

I know I have expressed it before but here it comes anyway: I love funeral sandwiches. The little triangular wonder-bread and industrial grade dolphin-harmful tuna salad in particular. I don't know what it is that makes them so good but you can bet your boots that I will be circling the table after every funeral. Plus it's the only time you get proper ham salad anymore.

I mean it's not like I can't make perfectly good tuna and ham salad sandwiches but they're not the same.

Death just makes food taste better.
posted by the uncomplicated soups of my childhood at 7:00 PM on July 26, 2016 [20 favorites]

the uncomplicated soups of my childhood: "Death just makes food taste better."

I will admit that every steak I've had tasted better than chewing on a cow while it was still alive. I had assumed it was the cooking that made the difference, but maybe it was actually the cow being dead.
posted by Bugbread at 7:03 PM on July 26, 2016 [51 favorites]

5 Cheese pies, 8 Greek veg, 10 Meat Supreme. Thank you
for a tip, here is the most prized cat from his porcelain cat collection,
he loved it the most, well second most, he loved that little piece, it was his heart, take it, take it
posted by Auden at 7:05 PM on July 26, 2016 [12 favorites]

That cow had a family and you're ordering it as pizza at a funeral!
posted by the uncomplicated soups of my childhood at 7:05 PM on July 26, 2016 [5 favorites]

Little would change for funeral homes in the city, where restaurants abound and a funeral parlor might struggle to entice people to eat there instead.

Depends. Do they also do delivery? They could monetize that hearse downtime. Like one of those "Uber for takeout" dealios. But in a hearse.

Neighbour: "I'm so sorry for your loss."

You: "My what? Oh, that. No. That was just the sushi we ordered last night."
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 7:07 PM on July 26, 2016 [13 favorites]

It's about time somebody put the "fun" back in funerals.
posted by dr_dank at 7:14 PM on July 26, 2016 [9 favorites]

And don't forget to visit our new salad bar!
posted by Greg_Ace at 7:16 PM on July 26, 2016 [6 favorites]

I will admit that every steak I've had tasted better than chewing on a cow while it was still alive.

I would pay a dollar to watch you test this theory.
posted by Greg_Ace at 7:20 PM on July 26, 2016 [10 favorites]

My wife and I got pre-paid funeral plans last year, and the options for food and drink were pretty amazing, including full bar service.
posted by Thorzdad at 7:35 PM on July 26, 2016 [3 favorites]

I guess I can see the appeal for families who are overwhelmed and can't find another place for the post-funeral gathering, or who simply can't find one. But I always felt like leaving the funeral home or the grave site to go elsewhere to eat and talk was a part of my grieving process.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 7:43 PM on July 26, 2016 [2 favorites]

I think if ham rolls as the go-to funeral food.
posted by Alluring Mouthbreather at 7:44 PM on July 26, 2016 [2 favorites]

"the options for food and drink were pretty amazing, including full bar service."

Wait, there are people who have funerals without full bar service?
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 7:45 PM on July 26, 2016 [11 favorites]

"Funeral cookies" reminds me of that thing you do when you're a kid and you lie down on the floor and put Oreos on your eyes like coins and fold your hands across your chest.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 7:46 PM on July 26, 2016 [13 favorites]

hand-carved wooden stamping molds that embossed a cross, heart, death's head or cherub on their tops

Fun fact! The popularity of funerary symbols can be graphed and used to date incomplete gravestones pretty accurately. You'd probably have been more likely to nosh on a death's head cookie up until maybe the 1770s, when you would have started seeing more cherub cookies. And so on.
posted by teponaztli at 8:18 PM on July 26, 2016 [8 favorites]

It's about time somebody put the "fun" back in funerals.

My dad died last month -- on father's day, actually. While I was back there, the funeral home called a number of times for various things. In a universe-is-laughing-at-you kind of irony, the name of my hometown is just the perfect length. The first time they called, the caller ID read "[Hometown] Fun."

Turns out part of grieving involves rapidly cycling through weird and odd emotions in a seemingly random fashion, and the first time that became real to me was the moment I realized that the "Fun" promised on the caller ID wasn't actually any kind of fun at all. Because for a moment there, there was a brief respite, and it was exciting and a relief, and then it was heartbreaking.

Now who wants snacks?
posted by mudpuppie at 8:39 PM on July 26, 2016 [23 favorites]

Funeral potatoes are probably the most comforting carb I've ever eaten. But I always hope for baked meats and I am always disappointed.
posted by notquitemaryann at 8:40 PM on July 26, 2016 [3 favorites]

When we were (more or less, not being particularly observant) sitting shiva for my mother, my coworkers sent a large platter of sandwiches, and the New York branch of the family sent a variety pack from Zabar's.

Death just makes food taste better.

You jest, the uncomplicated soups of my childhood, but I can't deny that having prepared food on hand was both marvelously distracting and life-affirming. It tasted like being okay, and that's as good of a seasoning as I can imagine.
posted by lumensimus at 8:42 PM on July 26, 2016 [13 favorites]

Question for lawyers: How can I make pizza and margaritas a requirement for my funeral?
posted by clorox at 8:53 PM on July 26, 2016 [3 favorites]

My grandmother died and we realized halfway through the (long) visitation that the family needed to eat. My cousins and I went to the nearest grocery store but they refused to sell us deli platters without 24 hours notice. So I found myself in the funeral home basement arranging meats artfully on a platter (they sold us the meats and the tray separately, so thoughtfully). A year later when my grandfather died, my very first thought was, "I'd better call the caterer." So the food was much better that time around.
posted by jeweled accumulation at 9:30 PM on July 26, 2016 [7 favorites]

that thing you do when you're a kid and you lie down on the floor and put Oreos on your eyes like coins and fold your hands across your chest

You were an "interesting" child, weren't you?
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 9:36 PM on July 26, 2016 [13 favorites]

Holy shit this thread is pure metafilter gold.
posted by Annika Cicada at 9:45 PM on July 26, 2016 [5 favorites]

they refused to sell us deli platters without 24 hours notice

If you are ever in need of last-minute catering platters and stuff, and are within driving distance of a Costco, they've got you covered.
posted by schmod at 9:59 PM on July 26, 2016 [6 favorites]

They also sell caskets. I smell a new market oppotunity for Costco...
posted by namewithoutwords at 10:06 PM on July 26, 2016 [6 favorites]

It would have to be enough for the whole family though.
posted by Annika Cicada at 10:07 PM on July 26, 2016 [5 favorites]

As in...enough caskets to bury the whole family...if Costco sold funeral packages...err...okay I'll leave the jokes to the actually funny people...
posted by Annika Cicada at 10:10 PM on July 26, 2016 [8 favorites]

Costco? Why not go to Casket Depot?
posted by Marky at 11:03 PM on July 26, 2016 [1 favorite]

I don't know what the hell led to the mayhem in this thread, but dear god, I hope it never stops.
posted by FelliniBlank at 11:29 PM on July 26, 2016 [3 favorites]

Why not go to Casket Depot?

On the bypass access road, right next to Enbalmers backward-R Us!
posted by Greg_Ace at 11:44 PM on July 26, 2016 [1 favorite]

Question for the clergy: How rich do I have to be to make pizza and margaritas replace the crackers and wine at my Catholic funeral?
posted by clorox at 12:15 AM on July 27, 2016 [2 favorites]

I will admit that every steak I've had tasted better than chewing on a cow while it was still alive.

They say that hot fresh blood from a live cow, Masai style, tastes like the divine essence of steak.
posted by Segundus at 12:31 AM on July 27, 2016 [1 favorite]

Pizza and margaritas are for the funeral afterparty. Do you even Catholic, bro?

(I have literally never attended a Catholic funeral that didn't end with people in the church lobby working out the logistics of a beer run for the afterparty while waiting for the hearse to be loaded.)
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 12:35 AM on July 27, 2016 [12 favorites]

I can't deny that having prepared food on hand was both marvelously distracting and life-affirming.

So machine-made sandwiches at funerals are like a milder equivalent of emergency sex?
posted by acb at 2:06 AM on July 27, 2016 [1 favorite]

The funeral place my extended family occasionally use has a recurring issue with a chippy (deep fried fish and chips, served in paper) that opened a few doors down in 2012. Namely, that the smell of fish and chips wafts around and through the place at times; a smell many English people find almost genetically programmed to act on.

I asked the director last year if anyone had ever tried to bring a bag of fish and chips in, and he looked at me with weary eyes and said "You have NO idea...". Left it at that, but his assistant overheard and later said that they were asked if they had any salt or vinegar by mourners/diners on a regular basis.
posted by Wordshore at 2:48 AM on July 27, 2016 [11 favorites]

One of the best comment threads i have ever read on Metafilter!
posted by Agave at 2:58 AM on July 27, 2016 [2 favorites]

(I have literally never attended a Catholic funeral that didn't end with people in the church lobby working out the logistics of a beer run for the afterparty while waiting for the hearse to be loaded.)

Those weren't true Catholics, then. A for-real Catholic funeral would already have the beer on-ice back at whomever's house the after-funeral was being held. Working out those details in the church lobby shows a failure in catechism.
posted by Thorzdad at 4:53 AM on July 27, 2016 [9 favorites]

I'm going to have a stipulation in my will that when I die, there must be pizza at my funeral for the mourners. Good pizza. None of this chain pizzeria shit.

Just stipulate "good pizza" and you can rest assured that you will have caused the worst fight your family has ever had.
posted by srboisvert at 5:33 AM on July 27, 2016 [24 favorites]

I always have this mixed-up feeling when I realize I'm enjoying drinking with my relatives at the post-funeral get-together. My cousin's suicide was a horrible tragedy that really messed up a lot of us for years, and we still had a great party after his funeral.

As for funeral cookies, my wife bakes them. Her Presbyterian church (as a mixed-up former UU I attend, but am not a member) keeps lots of cookies on hand (frozen, I think) for post-funeral receptions. Every so often she and the other volunteer bakers get told that supplies are running low and then she bakes a few more batches.
posted by Alluring Mouthbreather at 6:20 AM on July 27, 2016 [3 favorites]

Question for lawyers: How can I make pizza and margaritas a requirement for my funeral?

IANAL. Depends on jurisdiction on the format, and whether certain special conditions can attach, but it could be as easy as including in your will a direction with specific funeral instructions. You could include an article that reads something like "I direct that the expenses of my funeral and related expenses be paid out of my estate in such amount as my Personal Representative may deem proper. I also direct that as part of my funeral, pizza and margaritas are served."

Of course, that depends on partially on whether you trust your PR to make the right decision as to the right pizza and margaritas, someone might end up bringing a chicago style tomato pie and try to call that pizza and then you'd have a real problem, in which case I'd recommend giving specific directions as to pizza from a specific shop, style, toppings, etc.

If you REALLY want to make sure it gets carried out you can potentially add a special condition that attaches to the beneficiaries of your estate so that they have a vested interest in making sure that the funeral goes to your wishes, something like "Any beneficiaries that bring weak-ass pizza like that plastic garbage from Papa John's with the grody garlic butter sauce instead of my designated pizza shall be deemed to be deceased for all purposes of this instrument and will receive nothing from my estate."

Courts won't enforce provisions that break the law however, so you'll have to make arrangements for what you define as "funeral" if you're in a state that has laws that forbid food in a funeral home.
posted by Karaage at 6:39 AM on July 27, 2016 [5 favorites]

Costco? Why not go to Casket Depot?

$1,795 marked down from $4,995? With those kinds of savings, I can't afford NOT to die!
posted by The Underpants Monster at 6:44 AM on July 27, 2016 [13 favorites]

I'm smelling a new business opportunity for coldchef.
posted by fizzix at 7:05 AM on July 27, 2016 [4 favorites]

From the article:

“I feel absolutely that there should be a social gathering,” she said. “After a wake.”

Is a wake not a social gathering?
posted by explosion at 7:24 AM on July 27, 2016 [1 favorite]

I'm at the Pizza Hut what
I'm at the Taco Bell funeral yeah
I'm at the combination Pizza Hut and funeral
posted by backseatpilot at 7:35 AM on July 27, 2016 [9 favorites]

The best part of Jewish funerals is the food! My father-in-law was born Jewish, but his parents converted to Southern Baptist when he was a teenager. My father-in-law became a long-time Methodist, his brother an Evangelical Christian (pastor, sort of; it's all very complicated). When my father-in-law was older he began to reclaim his Jewish culture if not the religion, and so he had a Jewish funeral complete with rabbi. His brother's wife brought a ham.
posted by tippiedog at 7:47 AM on July 27, 2016 [4 favorites]

The best part of Jewish funerals any Jewish gathering is the food.
posted by tippiedog at 7:48 AM on July 27, 2016 [3 favorites]

Having a quick look at funeral (or post-funeral) food pictures on Flickr, and there's some interesting ones:

- sushi
- roast beef
- canapes
- varied
- Korean and more
- fried chicken?
- pasta
- cake
- Mexican?
- cold meat buffet
- sushi (wake)
- meats
- big buffet
- funeral home food
posted by Wordshore at 8:40 AM on July 27, 2016 [1 favorite]

Cuomo is clearly in the pocket of Big Tablescape
posted by sallybrown at 8:47 AM on July 27, 2016 [2 favorites]

Pro tip: don't put your funeral pizza instructions in your will. Nobody reads the will until after the funeral and then you're SOL on the pizza.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 8:48 AM on July 27, 2016 [5 favorites]

Wait, who eats at the funeral home? Is that a thing? Most of the funeral homes I've been to are pretty minimal.

All funerals I've been to go:
1. Funeral at church
2. Follow hearse to graveside
3. Reception at church or someone's house--that's when you have the food. Which people have been bringing over for days, there's lots of casseroles, hams, fried chicken (at my dad's: SO MUCH fried chicken) and desserts.

And since we were Southern Baptists, I have not yet been to a funeral with booze. Weep for me, Catholics.
posted by emjaybee at 9:12 AM on July 27, 2016 [4 favorites]

I imagine laying there in the hospital bed, my kids and grandkids in the room. I have trouble speaking loudly, so I gesture to indicate they should lean in. They do hoping to hear some final bit of wisdom, a reflection on my life, or a message of love. I whisper, "Thin crust from Beek's, party cut, bacon, onion, and anchovies. Have it delivered at the end of the service so it will still be warm."
posted by Alluring Mouthbreather at 9:14 AM on July 27, 2016 [6 favorites]

The best part of Jewish funerals is the food!

My great uncle was the person everyone in my family looked up to. His death was a huge blow to everyone. His funeral was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. It was also the first time I'd been to NYC in a number of years, after having spent a lot of my childhood there.

We all went back to my great aunt's apartment after the service for the reception. The only food was a big tray with bagels and lox. I hadn't eaten all day, so I had, like, four. And I remember thinking "wow, it's really awful that [great uncle's name] died, but these bagels are great!"

So now any time I hear New Yorkers complaining about bagels outside NY, I automatically think of my great uncle and his funeral bagels.
posted by teponaztli at 9:25 AM on July 27, 2016 [9 favorites]

"Funeral cookies" reminds me of that thing you do when you're a kid and you lie down on the floor and put Oreos on your eyes like coins and fold your hands across your chest.

The ferryman I'm imagining for this toll is delightful
posted by Kitteh at 9:27 AM on July 27, 2016 [7 favorites]

So does the ferryman eat the middle out of the Oreos and you're left with crumbs and smashed cookie pieces hastily arranged over your eyes?
posted by tilde at 9:59 AM on July 27, 2016 [8 favorites]

Question for lawyers: How can I make pizza and margaritas a requirement for my funeral?

Serious answer: echoing eyebrows, forget the Will. The real trick is, how do you get the information to your bereaved in time? Depending upon your religious persuasion and method of burial, you could be in the ground within a couple days of death. The funeral home will want you to decide upon arrangements and also get paid.

One option might be to set up a funeral trust that disperses funds immediately upon your death (some insurance companies sell these), along with specific funeral instructions. Here's where you could include your food order. The kids will go to the trust to get the money to cover the funeral (so they don't have to dig into their own pockets) and get the pizza order along with it.
posted by leotrotsky at 9:59 AM on July 27, 2016 [5 favorites]

As an aside, I plan to be cremated and have funds set aside for an annual croquet tournament in my honor. In addition to a small cash prize, there will be funds allocated for an open bar.

The 1st prize trophy will contain my ashes.
posted by leotrotsky at 10:03 AM on July 27, 2016 [4 favorites]

Hey guys, what if the ferryman is just a Kneebler elf
posted by Kitteh at 10:04 AM on July 27, 2016 [3 favorites]

If you eat enough cookies, the keebler elf eventually will be the ferryman
posted by mightshould at 10:11 AM on July 27, 2016 [5 favorites]

Hey guys, what if the ferryman is just a Kneebler elf

Who is the only elf for whom we regularly leave cookies? That's right, the ferryman is Santa. Taking us across the River Styx is his regular gig.
posted by Alluring Mouthbreather at 10:11 AM on July 27, 2016 [7 favorites]

I imagine laying there in the hospital bed, my kids and grandkids in the room. I have trouble speaking loudly, so I gesture to indicate they should lean in. They do hoping to hear some final bit of wisdom, a reflection on my life, or a message of love. I whisper, "Thin crust from Beek's, party cut, bacon, onion, and anchovies. Have it delivered at the end of the service so it will still be warm."

The unfortunate point wherein you have to smother a loved one.
posted by the uncomplicated soups of my childhood at 10:21 AM on July 27, 2016 [6 favorites]

If you eat enough cookies, the keebler elf eventually will be the ferryman

Ben and Jerry will be carrying my casket, I'm sure.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 10:26 AM on July 27, 2016 [4 favorites]

"I'm obviously going to the wrong funerals" - a thing I thought three times reading this thread.
posted by MCMikeNamara at 10:45 AM on July 27, 2016 [4 favorites]

There will absolutely be pizza. There will be people who order delivery pizza. I have seen pizza delivered to outdoor festivals, school field days, flower viewing parties, and campsites. If it is legal to order pizza delivery somewhere, people will do it.

a summer camp friend of mine's dad was a dentist and one visiting day he regaled us with safe-for-kids (non-terrifying) dentist horror stories, one of which was the teenage patient with braces who ordered a pizza to be delivered to his waiting room, the cheese and toppings from which he was later forced to pick out of her braces during the exam
posted by poffin boffin at 11:03 AM on July 27, 2016 [2 favorites]

Wakes are often multi-hour drop-in receptions at the funeral home so, yeah, food is helpful. And as fewer people are religious, more funerals are being held AT the funeral home. So it is nice for a grieving family,e specially if they're out of towners, to be able to do the wake-funeral-reception all in one place with the venue in charge of organizing it.

That said, my family's funeral receptions not only involve alcohol but polka to live accordion music and that may be a step too far for the dignity of a funeral home, drunk Catholics getting their polka on.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 11:11 AM on July 27, 2016 [8 favorites]

> The best part of Jewish funerals is the food!

Seconded, and the best part of MetaFilter is this thread!

"...and an extra pizza for Charon, he's hungry today. No anchovies."
posted by languagehat at 11:22 AM on July 27, 2016 [2 favorites]

That said, my family's funeral receptions not only involve alcohol but polka to live accordion music and that may be a step too far for the dignity of a funeral home, drunk Catholics getting their polka on.


Now it's four.
posted by MCMikeNamara at 11:38 AM on July 27, 2016 [2 favorites]

I've only been to one funeral gathering with alcohol, and that was a cash bar.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 11:38 AM on July 27, 2016 [1 favorite]

What do you serve at a funerary bar? A stiff drink!

I'll be here all week, but don't worry folks, he won't.
posted by the uncomplicated soups of my childhood at 11:51 AM on July 27, 2016 [12 favorites]

The best part of Jewish funerals is the food!

The best part of anything Jewish is the food! A former co-worker finally got around to doing her Bat Mitzvah and we were invited to the party afterward. Good lord, I ate so well.
posted by Thorzdad at 1:09 PM on July 27, 2016 [3 favorites]

That's mostly true, but had sweet gefilte fish at my last Seder, and it definitely was NOT the best part of the evening. Gefilte fish I like, but this was gefilte fish in syrup. Would not recommend.
posted by teponaztli at 3:03 PM on July 27, 2016 [1 favorite]

I'm almost afraid to ask, but what's emergency sex?

(Or what isn't?)
posted by clew at 5:39 PM on July 27, 2016 [1 favorite]

More on funeral cookies @ Table Matters: A Snack Called Death by Meg Favreau

I personally can't think of too much food that is explicitly funereal in my culture, most of the cookies and such do double duty for the high holidays. However, there is a food that I associate with funerals that the rest of my family does not. There's this kind of sandwich - white bread, crusts cut off, the filling is finely chopped ham mixed with either sweet pickle or relish - which is always served at funerals. And always the first to go! Any time my dad eats one of these sandwiches, his favorite next to a Map-O-Spread sandwich, I always ask him who died and he always shakes his head and wonders out loud why he had such a weird kid.
posted by Ashwagandha at 6:22 PM on July 27, 2016 [2 favorites]

My parents and I don't always get along, but I must say that their wishes for their funerals when they eventually pass are on point. Their plan consists of: Take the money that would have been spent on a memorial service and rent the back patio of a local restaurant, preferably on the water. Buy at least the first round for all attendees, and toast profusely.
posted by PearlRose at 7:18 AM on July 28, 2016 [1 favorite]

My requirements:

Green funeral/disposal of remains/no grave
Flattering photos of me *only*--at high resolution! I have seen so many shitty slideshows, ya'll. Or no photos. Or just one. Whatever. Just don't make me look like a blurry troll with bad hair. I'd rather have no photo than that.
No recorded music at my service (they always gets the sound levels wrong, also my favorite songs are weird and not crowd-friendly) ESPECIALLY no glurgy organ music.
Live music: instrumental only, classical or possibly blues is ok.
Upbeat eulogy: I did mostly what I wanted with my life, and now it's over. Do what you want with your life, you only get one.
A kickass buffet spread at my church, with good booze, and also stuff for kids to do, like color or go on the playground. I hate to see children being bored. People should bring their favorite dish in the world to share.
At some point later, have people come to my house and take as many of my books as they want (family first obviously). But they must take at least one. There can be booze at this also.
posted by emjaybee at 7:53 AM on July 28, 2016 [3 favorites]

Now I'm imagine-tasting memories of bean salad. Three- through nine-bean. And when I pan fried them a couple days into mourning with noodles like a Good fried rice, man .... I blew the family's ever-lovin' minds.

Of course, now we have the internets and I'm sure there are a million recipes for X-bean salad leftovers everywhere ....
posted by tilde at 7:41 PM on July 28, 2016 [1 favorite]

And when I was first of driving age, a few friends had a parent die. Damn straight I showed up with a mess of pizzas. Teenagers aren't gonna eat frickin four-bean salad.
posted by tilde at 7:43 PM on July 28, 2016 [2 favorites]

There was Coors Light at my grandmother's funeral.
But that was because my uncle put a 6 pack into the coffin with my grandmother.
Because of reasons.
posted by plinth at 12:43 PM on July 31, 2016